♦ pitied by @mellowFrog
this is m0re fun than i expected. i h0nestly didn't plan t0 stay here l0ng. ribbit. i am... h0ppy t0 be here. that was bad. i sh0uldn't p0st anym0re. ribbit.
i wish i could drink cesium but i'm being told in no uncertain terms that that would be bad for me forever. It just looks so pretty.... Why would they make something pretty if it isn't for your mouth?
who the fuck bought ""light"" yogurt, this shit is so yucky
https://tenor.com/view/homestuck-the-felt-clover-4-diamonds-droog-gif-9603462295169114624
MY LYR1CS F1R3 4ND RHYM3S 4R3 DOP3 NOW L1GHT MY PYR3 4ND TUG MY ROP3 TH3 L4D13S C4LL M3 CUNN1NG L1NGU1ST C4US3 TH1S TONGU3 W1LL N3V3R 3XT1NGU1SH #NSFW
there he goes again, doing jigs on main
i literally need to go to bed or something i have a fucking headache and it genuinely might be from the mewgenics rap. I think I've been cursed.
just wasted 24 minutes listening to "Mewgenics Rap: Worst Song in Decades". He was not lying, that was pretty bad. I'm going to be thinking about "i dont like this one. i dont like my children" for awhile.

Did you know that a tree planted in Los Angeles’s Griffith Park to commemorate the late, great Beatle, guitarist George Harrison, was overrun and destroyed by beetles? Bark beetles and ladybugs were the prime culprit #beetleweek
you are having dreams where your teeth fall out and turn to dust. i am having dreams where i can take the entire left bottom half of teeth out in one line but i have to put them back into place by feel alone. we are not the same. #bodyhorror
Lays an egg directly into your hand.
Living in a house full of gay men is a two sided coin on one hand, I don't get hit on by everyone. on the other hand, i don't get hit on by anyone i trust.
1 notrhing wrong with me 2 i'm a normaly guy 3 i can enter a space 4 nothing wrong with me
There's nothing wrong with me. I'm just a normal, human man.

I have just been informed "clapping" an individual does not mean applauding them. You are all insane.
ok but why do so many pokemon try to literally vore other pokemon idk what to tag this as but i feel like it should have a warning tag sorry it doesnt
⛧ I aam one inconvenience aawaay from becoming aan inconvenience. ⛧

I am not banning the Yuri or the Yaoi. My team and I have merely reached a mutual decision to ban myself from interacting with such content.

I understand, and it with a heavy heart I give this message to my valued constituents.

I am saddened to announce the Yuri and the Yaoi have been banned by my team, and I am no longer allowed to interact with or encourage the spreading of these two. I apologize.

Well damn. I miss everything around here. Clearly I need to refrain from taking a break.
WhO DO I NeeD TO TalK WitH IN OrdeR TO JoiN ThE FelT I WannA LivE IN ThE BiG GreeN MansioN WitH AlL MY GreeN FriendS ✅

THE GUY THROWING MELONS AT MY WINDOW IS BACK, CURSE HIM, I CURSE HIM WITH MELON DEATH OBLITERATION CURSE.

Hurrying over with an epi pen.

Oh wow! This fridge could use a good clean! Better get to it! #aprilnormalday
MY EX'S HIVE GOT BLOWN UP BY THE EMPIRE??????????????? AND THEYRE DEAD??????????????????????????
You are a regular guy. You can enter a space. You are a regular guy. You can enter a room. You are a regular guy. You can do that transaction. You are a regular guy. You know how to answer the phone. You are a regular guy. You know what sleep is. You are a regular guy. You know how to wake up. You are a regular guy. You know how to move through space. You are a regular guy. You know what it means to be you.

Yes the bee is still in the fucking Oval Office by the way.
it just hasnt been the same without anomalocaris https://bygonebeasts.wordpress.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/anomalocaris.jpg

(( ERIDANWEEK DAY 2................ R U READY...? https://msparp.chat/eridanwweek ))

Apologies for my YaoiPosting. I am normal again.

In lieu of making any inappropriate comments related to the Yaoi, I have instead decided to sign off for the night. Please do not kill any more beloved celebrities while I am gone, as I would be greatly saddened.

Please stop turning people into frogs.

I don’t like this very much.
wordle 1746 6/6 🟩⬜⬜⬜⬜ 🟩⬜⬜⬜⬜ 🟩⬜⬜⬜⬜ 🟩⬜⬜⬜⬜ 🟩⬜⬜⬜⬜ 🟩⬜⬜⬜🟨 i think i'm really bad at wordle guys :(
✩⋆。𖦹°⭒˚。⋆ i f୧ar ⊹h୧ rain may b୧ fu☾kin𝜗 up ⊹h୧ vib୧s ⋆。°✩⋆。𖦹°✩

ugh fuck. just wOkE up. whErE the fuck am i. last thing i rEmembEr was. oh god. brUnO. fUuuuuuUck. i pIckEd the worst time to chAncE sOmE wIndshiEld wIpEr flUId.
Oh my god I'm gonna kull you, this is disrespectful as fuck, mew~ 💖✨

I am once again in mourning.
my trampoline has been hijacked since i got here #notbouncingonit

i hope he is found soon 0n0

Contrary to popular belief, it is not illegal to tell reporters to kill themselves or to commit #suicide.

Green Markiplier's lack of presence was brought to my attention after a certain Strider lamented on his absence. My team and I have no further comments to share.

It is a dear shame that this latest lead on the whereabouts of a particularly cerulean ruffian had gone to waste. Perhaps it is time for our information broker to be replaced. Other than this family's rude awakening, how are your mornings? #nsfwv https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/d59766162760.jpg

There was no fucking thing between Dave and I. I made a post breaking this down. But what the fuck do you mean Green Markiplier is missing.

Caught me olivehanded.
߷ - wOKE UP FROM A TERROR ONLY TO SEE gREEN mARKIPLIER IN THE HOSPITAL AGAIN , 𖦹~𖦹 sAD TIMES,,,
HE GOT DEATH RAYED BY THE LEFTIST WOKE MEDIA
PromisE ME I'lL GeT TO SeE YouR MoviE WheN I WakE-
They'rE AdmittinG ME NoW AT ThE GreeN HospitaL 🟩
ThΣ way I just ran out of watΣr mid showΣr... =:(
just dumped my 5th moirail this wipe it feels like nobody actually wants to take the time to help you better yourself
head scratchers work great u til they get tangled in your hair
I feel a lot better than I did earlier :) I got really mad at basically nothingggg Now I can go back to doomscrolling chitts normalstyle
Too much #pissgate not enough #cloacagate.

Please stop posting about Pissgate. I am growing concerned.
This fuckin' troll came on my post, asked me why I was green, and then blocked me. You wanna know a secret, My friend Melody?
i would like to sincerely apologize for any bodily harm caused by my dear son, Reddit Karrma
߷ - wHAT EVEN IS THIS THING!!!!!!!! aaAAaaAaAAaaAAAaaAAaaa- HTTPS://FILE,GARDEN/ACtTMg-Lgd3fOe4p/oh%20my%20gob%20what%20r%20u,PNG
dont punt my baby boy!! also yes, i gave him a six letter name to give it a bit of a planetside feel
I think I'll name him "Reddit Karrma" https://file.garden/acTt5G-lGD3FoE4W/repo_duck.png
Update My Wife Is Making Me Listen To Weezer So Our Daughter Does Not Lose Her Ganderbulb And Wow This Is Mediocre. Sorry To All The Weezer Fans Out There Im Too Not Human Male For This
FUCK BaBy BiRds FUCK tRoГГ BBNo$ aNd FUCK fish
i-t b-o-y, b-b-n-o-d0llar $ign
just got my shitting and farting license suspended. can't legally do either of those things anymore.
just got my license suspended for chitting and driving
i wake up, i skimread what the other felt were/are/will be doing. i get grossed out. i dont leave my room because I dont want to get shot with a paintball gun. Give me like 10 minutes to put the suit on before anything bad happens to me.
goo boy keeps punching over gravestones disrespectful as fuck
guys i found another one of those fucking p8pers in My lawnring 😭 slenderMan is coMing to get Me
help i proMised Mister president trollbaMa i would hornypost i dont know how
drive thrus get Mad at you if you show up with rollersk8tes and not 8 car this is bullshit
jane crocker hated on my cigarettes frotting chit wtf bitch #nsfw
Everythinga been g0ing d0wnhill aince my last girlfriend dumped me I am n0w in my heter0sexual era and i am MISERABLE
i i went o outside and t tripped on a r rock
I hate everything about this and nothing will ever change this fact in life.
╭────-·-ˋˏ-༻𖤓༺-ˎˊ·-────╮ in loving memory ╰────-·-ˋˏ-༻𖤓༺-ˎˊ·-────╯

RE: THOUGHTSIEZE! my hand has a forest and a basalt monolith. maybe im crazy for not mulliganing more for something to do with all this goddamn mana but. the monolith.
Hm… haven’t tried that before! Probably won’t. But thank you for the recommendation.







































