Miss Lalonde
@tenebrousGuardian
just a middle aged alien who still tags selfies with #gpoy if youre that curious. thoroughly entangled with @pulchritudePowerhouse. [[all character art is my own]]
i wasnt the one who shot him dead but i dream about it often. #violence
i really should have expected that the semi- to fully aquatic userbase would tilt the scales towards "beach" on that poll but then again that was probably always going to win the poll regardless. any complaints that people have about too much sand and too much sun really do shrink to nothing in the face of how nice those things feel when you get there.
early summer poll. <3 - beach <> - lake <3< - pool c3< - garden hose
my answer to this one is always very basic and predictable but how about everyone else? what are your favorite flowers?
we must mind miss frieda. her being queen of the castle and all. but you shouldnt have that problem with orchids. they just take a bit more care than other houseplants might.
i never considered myself a human who expressed a lot of gratitude until very recently. but thats the thing isnt it? im a human and youre a troll and neither one of us is a carnation. were a bit more complex than that.
id say so! but youve been doing a lot better at all those word puzzles than i have.
wordle i did actually solve but connections bested me. i have about a 20% success rate with it so far.
bAyHoPs. UsEd tO Be aBoUt tHe oNlY ThInG WiLlInG To gRoW BaCk oN ThE BeAcH I CaMe uP On. EvErYtHiNg eLsE GoT BeAtEn dOwN By tHe sAlT, tHe wInD, aNd tHe sTuBbOrNnEsS Of tHe cOaSt. BuT NoT ThEm. ThEm lItTlE MoThErFuCkErS HeLd oN. pReTtIeSt dAmN GiFtS Of tHe gReEn yOu'd eVeR LaId eYeS On, ToO. :o) aNyTiMe i gOt aLl fUcKeD Up aNd tUmMy-tRoUbLeD, i'd wAnDeR OuT AnD SnAcK On a fEw. OlD ReMeDy. mIrAcUlOuS LiL' tHaNgS. hOnK.
I got very lucky with connections today, wordle I swear I guessed every other possible combination of letters except the correct last one.
also known as goats foot! used topically to relieve jellyfish stings. i also have a lot of admiration for hearty and persistent flowers. not everything beautiful has to be so delicate and temperamental. other wildflowers i love include clovers and thistles.
oh. this is the first time ive seen a face on here that made me genuinely angry. and ive seen a lot of faces on here. #vaguepost #notelaborating
mister sternwood was very insistent that if i was going to be tagging along with team sleuth i had to abide by the dress code. i think i pull it off fairly well. #gpoy #columbobignaturals https://images.squidge.org/images/2026/05/23/teamsleuth.png
you didnt even have this extreme of a reaction when i was all dolled up for the gala. i feel like im learning things about you.
I'm normal. I'm normal about you. I'm absolutely not havin' a harder time keepin' that normalcy under wraps. The very notion I'm not strikes me as ridiculous.
im trying to think of any way i can feign innocence and spin that to mean anything else but im coming up empty handed. hello jade sweetheart.
hiiii auntie! dont worry its kind of funny seeing what youre like with other people and yknow im 24 my glasses may be thick but im not exactly blind here i know where rose gets it from
do i need to be worried about this distracting you too much whenever i tag along for your work?
ABSOLUTELY NOT. If anything my senses will be SHARPER THAN EVER if you're around and in that outfit and also wear that really nice perfume you wear or whatever it is that smells real nice.
i was thinking i should look into a new cologne to complete the ensemble. it just feels right i think. would you like to help me pick one out?
Yeeees ma'am. Understood ma'am. Literally anything you wish is my command, ma'am.
well yes i guess thats one thing she also gets from you you both think youre very funny! and unfortunately i do too which makes it worse because im enabling it all the time!
later this evening im picking up some new work attire from my favorite tailor. hes the one who fitted rosie for her prom suit and phil for the gala. he was very excited to get to choose something for me this time. ill share a picture later.
i didnt realize how much id been taking my big comfy bed for granted until i spent last night upright in a chair. my back was stiff all day.
Sorry about that, babe...
dont be. if youd had it your way i would have been curled up in that hospital bed with you. ... and still would have had a stiff back from it.
Yeah, let's just curl up in our big soft nice bed instead. I didn't say anything embarrassing when I was doped up by the way, right?
do you mean to me or to chittr? not that it matters which one you mean. the answer will be the same.
Now I did. Think I might need to take a shower for the next couple-a days on account of suicide bein' off the table, I'm guessing?
lol could you imagine?
i know that im the one who made a lying thread for lying in but im too vain of a woman. i cannot make myself say these words even out of commitment to the bit. https://images.squidge.org/images/2026/05/18/IMG_8848.jpeg
oh i have a much better idea. ask me questions and i promise i will lie to you. would you like some misinformation? ask away.
Have you finally leashed that man of yours?
hmm? no he has entirely free reign of the house and surrounding property. i cant imagine why i would keep a grown man on something as degrading as a collar and leash.
when relationships are based on mutual respect the appeal of belittling or insulting a mans basic human dignity just doesnt feel that compelling.
It's enrichment for them, Lalonde. They liked to be tugged around on a leash by beautiful women.
when youre someone like me who is extremely selective with the information you volunteer about yourself most other people wouldnt know which questions to ask if theyre even interested in knowing more to start with.
this q&a trend seems interesting but i would probably just keep it as a thread on site instead of opening an ask box somewhere else. assuming anyone would even have anything to ask me. the line between "mysterious" and "boring" can be a fuzzy one.
the timing is a shame i wouldve loved to go to a costume ball. maybe i can still talk mister sleuth into a dance anyway before the night is over. he was a fantastic partner for the one dance we got to share at the last gala.
We don't need an excuse to dance, doll. I'm your huckleberry. Any time, any place.
ill have to ask you to go easier on me this time. we have a lot of space at home but its still not a ballroom. how about i put on some sinatra and we can slow dance?
You know just what to say to fly me to the moon, beautiful. In other words; hold my hand, darling.
the last time someone asked me about the mausoleum in the back yard they had assumed from how dearly i spoke of the interred that the monument held roses father. i did eventually correct this misunderstanding. while i dont have any proof that he (the father not the entombed) is still alive no one has been able to prove that he is dead either. #violence just in case since im pondering on #death.
every now and then ill set aside some time to sit on the porch and listen to the waterfall. its a bit loud for me to be calling it "peaceful" but it is a nice sound. comforting in a numbing sort of way.
Sometimes I put on headphones and play Limp Bizkit at full volume while it hurts my ears and I can't focus on anything. Probably the same thing.
that waterfall is always my favoUrite part of visiting the maryam-lalondes. such a darling hoUse yoU have!
while i appreciate the compliment i will have to take offense on behalf of zazzerpan the learned for not earning the number one spot of best feature of my house.
alas, he was lost before my time. his sacrifice, i'm told, was heroic.
that may be the saddest thing ive yet to hear on this site. did... did he get a proper send off? a memorial service at least?
as big as this house is there are very few rooms that weve yet to "christen" during this sort of honeymoon phase. and following this train of thought ive realized i havent shown him the observatory yet. youd think it would come up sooner but as ive mentioned weve been a bit distracted. #suggestive #nsfw
You have an observatory??? What the hell are there any more secrets in this house I should know about? Some sort of underground river I should know about next?
Also oh shit I just got what you meant by "christen!"
hey baby lets go for a little walk outside. get some fresh air. you only ever come and go through the fenestrated plane connecting to your office. i think you should get a better feel for the property.
Y'know that's fair. I haven't really gotten to experience this Earth that you called home very much. It can't be that bad-a place if it's where you're at.
@tipsyGalactica how are you doing by the way roro? we didnt get to speak for very long at the gala there was so much going on.
i was going to say "last weeks gala" but that really was ten whole days ago. that week and a half really got away from me.
oh i totlly get that honestly ive been so buried in lab stuff these past few days i didnt even realize its been that long since the gala lmao (which probably says somethin about my current work/life balance but w/e) idk, even if it can get a lil exhaustin sometimes, workin on stuff that might actually improve ppls lives feels pretty rewarding in itself so i cant complain TOO much yk but enough abt me lol howv u been, maam? :3
im so glad to hear that youve found rewarding work. a vibrant and brilliant young man like you should be able to spend his days doing things that he enjoys. please do make sure to enjoy it though. make time for breaks and recuperation. or at least a very very good meal. daily lifes been improving for me since the gala. for a while it was just executus and me at home and as nice as he is for company it did feel a bit lonely. bringing in a housemate was a wonderful change. the house is still a bit big for just two adults and one cat but we will probably be downsizing in the near future which im even more excited for honestly.
that was a depressive streak of posts. heres a palette cleanser to break it up. #wizard #wizardposting https://images.squidge.org/images/2026/05/14/image_2026-05-14_204646910.png
Ddo you think the gemstone+feather headpiece has some sort of function? Or maybe some sort of denotation of rank..
for some reason this is the track I picture while he's riding the beam. https://open.spotify.com/track/5uFkLykDNRQ5Mi3ZETxsN9?si=a50340adeb304667
HOYLY SHITTT hes usin his own majyyk missile as a hoverboard!!!!!! im defo gettin this framed n hang it on my wall
i like to seem them as protective charms. one on his hat for bodily protection one on his bag to protect against theft.
extremely good and extremely fitting. i love this. thank you.
I entirely missed the satchel gem! Yyour perceptive skills trump mine..
just imagine how fast he must be moving on such a projectile. and yet he maintains this level of composure. i find more and more reasons to be impressed by him every time i look.
gogsh ur so rite.... the law of inertia aint got shit on this guy judgin by how unbothered he is if u told me this wozard was an archmage, highest among his peers, id totes buy it, cuz he definitely looks the part
there was a girl who grew up with a ticking timer over her head. every day the numbers stared her down dropping steadily-- years, months, days, hours, minutes, seconds getting smaller. "when this timer reaches zero" an old man told her "the whole world is going to end." the timer was such a constant in her life that even when she wasnt looking at it she knew exactly what it would read, how close it was to zero, to the very second. "inevitable" "inescapable" it was supposed to be this thing twined inseparably with the very nature of the world she was created in. when the timer reached zero her world still stood. the destruction that was supposed to rain from the sky didnt come. but it was supposed to. she knew that it was supposed to. the timer wasnt meant to read zero but for a fraction of a second before it was obliterated with everything else. but it stared at her and kept staring for years. it kept staring for a decade. the girl could not be relieved that the world still stood. there was something more precious to her that could not continue to exist without that destruction. she feared every day that it might disappear as though it had never been there in the first place because without the destruction it wouldnt have been created. so the girl spends that decade examining everything as closely as possible, testing every possibility, making every adjustment, trying and trying and trying to bring that destruction she had been promised. the precious thing starts to hate her and she lets it. she doesnt need for it to think well of her she just needs it to live. the precious thing doesnt disappear and the girl cant prove that it isnt in part due to her efforts. maybe the work shes doing is promise enough of a coming destruction that the universe wont write it off as a failure just yet. but what if she eases up? what if she becomes satisfied with a decade of undisturbed status quo and decides that nothing has any consequences after all? what if that choice to stop is what kills her precious thing? i dont know how to resolve this story satisfactorily. im sorry that i cant give you a nice conclusion.
Don't need to apologise. Sstories can be revised. Maybe you'll figure out the ending later, you know?
Might be one of those stories where the ending comes to you through serendipity rather than rackin' your brain to figure out how to end it.
oh i dont watch very much scifi. i find it too depressing. ill take your word on the similarities.
thank you. there are a few more chapters to go im sure. the next one is already in progress actually but its too early to share very much.
maybe. though i did have a rather charming gentleman offer to be my coauthor. what he pitched me was very tempting. do you think it would be alright to let him take some of the trickier bits off of my plate? it wouldnt feel like im taking advantage of his good will?
I think any gentleman worth his salt would do anything for a dame in need, even if there weren't any rewards to reap. So you shouldn't worry 'bout any-a that.
Not usually a fan of happy endings but I hope this eventually has one.
this isnt an excuse and the situation is still difficult beyond words but i didnt put the gun in his hand. he took it from me himself. whether im glad that he did or not... i cant tell. #violence