Dirk Ultima
@transcendedTherian
Narration rights currently under review.
Am i still a virgin if ive never really been me when canoodled? #nsfw
Look everyone we got a brand new member for the council of CHUD's.
You think I could convince people to do things if I started calling myself "The Prince in Pink"?
Round that off with some glitter heels and a sparkly tiara and you'll have them kissing your feet. Source: trust me bro.
somedays youre jovial merriment, getting win after win after win but somedays youre OOB, stuck in a hell dimension of your own making surrounded by the twisted shadows of your every insecurity
choose thine horse
God, fuck, I'm weeping tears of straight joy over here, shit's the best fucking thing I've seen all week. A winner if I've ever seen one.
Smells like some high-school therian bullshit. My girl's innocent until proven guilty, and it sounds like the only thing she's guilty of is being a hero.
There is something oddly fitting about starting a wave of bullshit nonsense in the middle of seemingly a genuine crisis.
Contrary to belief, they go hand-in-hand. A veritable ouroboros of shit guzzling and shit production.
maybe i should repost some of my preferred puppet gifs. i feel bad for everybody new who doesn’t get to see the best ones. maybe i could make a master post.
#puppet https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/978a8e1d86db.gif
thanks. the #puppet tag has a lot of my posts if you ever feel like going through. or the #puppetfucker tag if you wanna get crazy.
Nice play getting the 404 black screen to reflect my depravity.
how thick does a string have to be to end up considered a rope?
You're looking at it all wrong man. How thin does a string have to be to be a deli wire.
No, you're not "puppyboy" or "catgirl". You're 27 and unemployed. Get a job.
Finally, someone said it.
Close. 33.
m e o w
♡૮₍ฅ ᵔ ꈊ ᵔ ฅ₎ა --(woof!)
o w o meow mew
૮ ฅ• ﻌ -ฅ ა arf ! 🦴
w i n k meow meow purr purr mew 🎾
Holy fuck, please stop encouraging him to debase himself. It's bad enough he's picked *that* as his profile picture.
awe but we r having such a fun convo vvvv important
THE SECRET TO EVERY PU̶PPET IS THAT WHEN YOU̶ TAKE THEM FROM THEIR DOMAIN OF ABSOLU̶TE KNOWLEDGE AND CONTROL, THEY ARE U̶LTIMATELY SPOILED BRATS DEEP DOWN.
:33 < MASSIVE PURREAKING MEWS!! Meow this is a big one! :33 < Lanrol Dersch, the mayor of Funich has gotten herself into hot water ofur leaked expense repurrts that came across her desk. :33 < It is alleged that Dersch has pushed furward a purroposal fur a new ShrodrCorp headquarters to be constructed nearby, after purressure and pushback furom the company. :33 < There is some reason to believe that the expansion would not only serve as a corporate headquarter fur the company, but also to aid in less than ethical research and development! :33 < As of yet it is unknown what may be purroposed to go on behind closed doors, but regulatory bodies are in a stir. :33 < Mayor Dersch has b33n a very loud purroponent of the "Quadrant Values" campaign, stating publicly that she believes in loyalty to her quad, and has b33n in a long standing and very public kismesitude. Despite this, it has b33n rumeowred and all but confurmed that Dersch has had quite the romantic exchanges with her ShrodrCorp company contact! :33 < We received some purroof of the communications betw33n Dersch and the nameless contact, but it is apparent that the Mayor is quite bad at sexting! It is unknown if her Mistress felt genuinely or whether this was a seduction meant to smooth ofur the construction. :33 < We have omitted the photos involved to purrotect the identity alleged mistress. Although most were innocuous, the pair was pictured together enough to build quite the pattern! :33 < It is not clear if this was anything verging on a possible matespurritship, or if the mistress was seducing Mayor Dersch in order to facilitate quick construction of the ShrodrCorp headquarter. :33 < We have attached some of the rather embarrassing text transcripts betw33n the pair as purroof. #Gossip #Drama #ShrodrCorp #MayoralRace #Infidelity #CheatingScandal #QuadrantValuesCampaign #Affair #BlindItem #SubmittedStory #CorpoDrama
Once again proving that everything is about sex, except for sex, which is about furthering the capitalist agenda.
Putting ice in orange juice is a war crime. You drink that shit straight from the teat the way mankind intended, no cubes, no dilution, no cowardice. Our ancestors did not crawl out of the primordial ooze, invent agriculture, split the atom, and put a man on the moon just so you could water down a citrus beverage like some kind of pussy bitch. I don't make the rules I just enforce it personally, one Tropicana carton at a time.
Golly babe darling light of my spectral non-existence 𝐌𝐲 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠. I want you to know i am 100000% in your corner on this citrus crusade. That said gosh isnt it just downright SPIFFING that a beverage temperature preference has become like a whole personality arc for you? Most fellows collect stamps or take up fencing but you decided to declare holy war on ice cubes. Capital use of your time brometheus truly inspiring *\ (>o<) /*
Living rent free in my head does not grant free reign to be a little shit about my hydration choices. I got your eviction notice right here on my desk. Just waiting be signed, sealed and delivered.
You know what? Here. Flemish Horse on your timeline. You're welcome. #horseposting
