Dirk Strider (The twentieth one on this site.)
@timaeusTestifeline
((He/Him, art by homoeroticdoctor on tumblr)) ((Expect NSFW posts))
Last chitt: over a week ago now. Against all odds, it's starting to look like I actually have a life. Heinous.
Don't Worry No One Missed You
I would've said "I'd be surprised if anyone did," but the homies are coming out in droves to shut down that line of thinking in real time. Indirectly, you got a guy feeling more appreciated. Thanks.
[-- timaeusTestifeline [TT] uploaded an image file. --] [-- timaeusTestifeline [TT] uploaded 13 more image files. --] [It's a garbled mess of glitchy photos. There's not much actually discernible here, save for the scant few shots showcasing a sink and a marbled floor, depicting the scene of a bathroom. At least, that's what it looks like, from what little is perceptible through the seemingly broken camera.] [-- timaeusTesitifeline [TT] uploaded an audio file. --] [-- timaeusTestifeline [TT] uploaded 4 more audio files.] [It's nothing but grating static, loud enough to hurt the ears.] [-- timaeusTestifeline [TT] uploaded a text file. --] [Frankly, I'm not sure how to start this. Especially considering this is probably way outta left field. But shit, I built up the nerve to write this whole sappy soliloquy, I might as well try and get it out at an opportune time. With that said, I'm not sure if this'll ever even leave my PC. But, whatever. If you end up actually seeing this, @tactlessCamcorder, this is for you. Logically, I know you aren't my real bro. That one died before I could ever get to know him outside of the looped tapes and faded writing he left for me. (Probably better to remove this section.) And you've got your own Dirk to look after. Your own family, the whole shebang. But even with that in mind, you've always treated me like one of your own. Sat down and listened to all my bitching like it was the most important shit in the world. (Don't include this in a letter, you jackass.) Gave me a heaping helping of your patented parental advice if I ever even hinted at having a problem. All with the patience of a goddamn saint, and all the warmth of a heated blanket on a winter night. Before I knew you, *actually* knew you, all I had was the impression of that warmth. Left by those pre-recorded tapes and movies I've watched a hundred times by now. And I've always wondered if I'd be up to snuff if I ever met you, any version of you, for the first time. If you would actually care in all -- in any of -- the ways I've fantasized. I realize now that it was stupid to ever think otherwise. You care. Genuinely, actually care. Anyone could tell from a mile away, but I've never really reciprocated that self-same compassion you've always had in spades for me. So, that's why I'm writing this. To let you know. That I appreciate you, I mean. That I appreciate everything you've done for me, every word you've spared for me. All of it, I'm grateful. You may not be my "real" bro, but to me? You're all that and more. And that's all a guy like me could ever ask for. Hell, a decade ago, I never thought I'd even have the one, but I'm fortunate enough to have two. You and Dave. (Put all this above the last sentence, maybe? With some rewriting.) Happy Father's Day, D. Probably a late Father's Day by the time I actually send this out, but it's the thought that counts, or something. Anyway, that's the end of this. Feel free to start gagging at all the saccharine sentiment I vomited the fuck out. I know this is all weird as hell coming from me, but...I wanted to get this out of my system. That's about the least I can do, after everything you've done for me. Love you, man. You know I do. Thanks for coming to my TED talk. Dirk out. (<== Delete this later. You're not funny.)]
aw i love you kid seems like maybe you didnt mean to lost this but i love you like my own kid and i will always be here for you let’s meet up soon, yeah? we should catch up. i’d be really happy to have the chance.
Uh, yeah. Yeah, I'd like that. It's been a good bit, and it's actually been on my mind, so...whenever you're available, I'd like to see you again.
Shades got smashed to shit. The hell did that thing spit out while I was getting my ablutions on?
BPP < s33ms like your pupil reading software nyassumed you wanted to hit 'upload all' B33 < or at least sefurral B33 < if its any cawnsolation i dont think anything bad got posted
Oh, fuck.
B33 < the lettpurr was sw33t though
...thanks. I don't think it was ever going to see the light of day otherwise, so, I guess this isn't the worst outcome in the world. Just a little embarrassing.
I realized I had not done another one of these in a very long time. This will be hanged up next to the first one I did, both within my office. These are just a few of my favorite accounts on this lovely website of Chittr.ing.
The shoutout's appreciated, Mr. President. Figured I leaned towards the obnoxious more than the endearing to make it onto a list like this, but color me a serious shade of surprised.
I went to respond to this and proceeded to knock over an entire can of Bud Light. I then went on to half-heartedly clean it up in order to express my fondness for you as quickly as possible. I believe the action that just occurred is, in itself, more telling than any statement I could possibly make.
Damn. Really is. Got a guy's stone cold heart feelin' genuinely touched here, Brobama. And that's no condescension. Pouring one out for the fallen drink, though. RIP.
~~~a human tricked me intQ captchalQguing an "Qrange" intQ my tech-hQp fetch mQdus. WHAT THE FUCK RHYMES WITH "QRANGE"?!?!?!~~~
Happens to every tech hop user at least once. It's basically a right of passage. Find a door hinge at your local troll Home Depot or whatever. Alternatively, borrow one from your doors and fix it later.
#Murderontherails fucking ruled. Yeah, even I'm capable of admitting when I had some real, actual fun every once in a while. Don't take the success of the event as an excuse to keep bustin' your ass though, @archangelsTerrarium. Take a break after all of this, man. More than earned the right, I think.
YOU DID GREAT !!
Says you, dude. Didn't have a damn clue it could even be you, and that's sayin' nothing of your actual performance. You did hella good.
Doomscrolling on Chittr is definitely the recession indicator for well-adjustment. The only thing worse would actually be chitting on a semi-frequent timeframe.
Hey, this wasn't a callout post. If anyone's feeling singled out by what was basically a self-report, that's not my problem to deal with. But for the record, myself.
yeah this is some real shit dude dapping you up as we speak
Dap up received and returned twofold, lest you think I'm leaving you high and dry here, bro.
Is there such a thing as a neurotypical Strilonde?
The answer is self-explanatory.
why does EVERYONE who fights me do the fucking HULK SMASH PUNY GOD move to me when they get the chance? EVERYONE. one sec. you won't believe this shit.
i mean. 7ou're prett7 short. it's a tempting opportunit7
everyone I fight comes to this conclusion independently of one another.
and now that I've said this, everyone else I fight is gonna do this shit to me too. I can feel the fucking soul lightning grappling hook consecutive slams, @timaeusTestifeline .
Look, I'm not saying you gave me the idea, but next time we strife...might wanna look out for it.
maybe i shoal get a giant spaceship and m0ve to space
I might be able to assist with that.
aight ill go to yo place later
I've never built a spaceship before, but you know what they say: ain't any time better than the present. I'll ask Siluri if I can borrow his unless you've got a spare I can reverse engineer.
nah i kno exactly where to get one ill bring it to ya
Sweet. Let's get you into space, Peixes.
okay my 8reathing sacs may 8e slightly 8lackened 8ut we are good and gucci I am #outtathere and safe
You might want to head to the hospital. I don't think sitting in a coup d'hotbox for that long's good for you.
amid the insanity currently going on around me, I DO have an exciting non-coup related announcement that is very important to me and I don't want to have to wait until I can get outta here to post it SO !! THE YAOI FAIRY.....HAS FOUND LOVE !! I'm so flushed for you, Froggie !! I cannot wait to spend our lives together, no matter how long or short, difficult or easy !! As long as you're there, then I'm happy !! ૮ ꈍﻌ ꈍა♥(˘ ε˘ )
The Yaoi Fairy has finally found his own yaoi. Congratz, man.
(\ /) what the fuck is happening.
The coup Meenah's been planning is finally going down now. Obviously, we all knew it was going to happen at some point, but the optics of it are questionable at best.
Don’t worry a8out me my ass will 8e fine I’m more worried a8out THE SITUATION HONESTLY
THE SSITUATION DOESSNT MATTER >8/ YOU GET YOUR ASSSS SSOMEWHERE SSAFE BECAUSSE A COUP /IKE THAT WI// A/WAYSS END UP WITH SSEVERA/ PEOP/E GETTING CU//ED >8/ #VIO/ENCE
yeah I’m just gonna hide for now, I’m worried more a8out the president than myself
He's still got his bodyguard with him, yeah? He'll be fine with that dude around, I'd think.
@corallineCataclysm Mind telling me why your moirail's causing an international incident right now? Shit might damn well be interuniversal at this point. It's not like she ever does her job anyway, so the fuck's she gonna do with presidential power? Sit on it?
probubbly cuz she wants to and prez couldnt stop it if he tried
Informative. Well, hope Trollbama survives. Half of Chittr would go to war for that guy, and I think they'd have Meenah C's head by the hour should we get an alert regarding his death.
bro im in space rn wifi is shit over here i dont know wtf is goin on down there
I figured you would, honestly. My bad on that front. I'll keep you updated.