♥ liked by @gargantuanThottie
guys😭if😭you😭see😭a😭link😭that😭says😭busty😭alternian😭troll😭dominates😭chud😭human😭male😭grub😭scars😭UNCENSORED😭4k😭high😭definition😭dont😭click😭it😭thats😭a😭virus😭that😭will😭turn😭your😭spaces😭into😭crying😭emojis😭 #suggestive
mans out here freestylin yall cant even freestyle a grocery list im just vibin droppin bars while you droppin outta the top 10 dont miss like okay for those still lost we spellin a phrase letter by letter keep up full acrostic architecture you couldnt build a birdhouse let alone this so dont trip when a bar dont rhyme its choice unlike your whole entire career honestly half these bars just kramer bustin in unannounced more presence than yall here im droppin letters like barack dropped mic you droppin like youre blockbuster stock time dont apply to me in the booth even on the clock meanwhile yall still tryna holmes the acronym elementary you mad slow every letters a horcrux you a muggle who aint even made it past book one bro understand this a lifestyle a religion one pope and it damn sure aint you put it together yourself this aint no wheel of fortune i aint handin you a clue #thisisanad #noyoucantjoin #alphatimelineonly #barackpleasesponsorme
https://files.catbox.moe/qf0u1v.gif
in honor of 9/11 im letting two taller women have their way with me until i collapse #suggestive
lesbians peeing call that yurinating
Let's talk about subs. Or rather, let's talk about the strawman fallacy of sexual identity because god forbid anyone just enjoy a single fucking thing without erecting a whole personality shrine to it. You've decided that kneeling on a rug for twenty minutes constitutes a dedicated ontology, like the guy in the gimp suit and a flogger discovered a pillar of the human condition. He didn't. He found a hobby. You found a hobby. Congratulations, you've discovered that leisure activities exist, a fact the universe will continue to be spectacularly indifferent to. "But Dirk", I hear you cry around your PetSmart patented chew toy, "kinks are there to allow exploration of the body and mind, to be free of the shackles of modern society, to shed the ego and touch something primal and honest that capitalism stole from us at birth." You get your nipples clamped for ninety seconds and suddenly you need a full post-scene debrief with the emotional production values of a director's commentary track. Bonus features. Deleted scenes. A whole featurette on "the making of my subspace." Nobody asked for the Criterion edition of your feelings. You did a bit. A fun little bit in a warm room with snacks nearby, and where the only ever real threat was if you shat the bed calling a guy twice your age "daddy". Giving up control is only impressive if you had any to begin with. You were always gonna outsource your executive dysfunction. The collar just gave it a font. #nsfw #nsfwe #bdsm #fetish #kink
Time for a pot noodle and a wank #nsfw
yall know im all bout cats love those fluffy lil thangs would not trade em 4 the world but would u fuk w/ a rolal who got a little bnuuy (intentional typo) w/ it sumtimes
ths tl needs some estrogen *drops my pallet of blue pills* o fuk *trips over them tryin 2 pick them up* shiiiiiiiiiiiit *watches as thy bust down a wall w/ sheer volume* im fuuuuuuucked
happy bisexual visibility month ya filthy animals
8=x < R 8=l < Right then
Found myself standing here this afternoon and would you believe it half of chittr was there too! #substance
anyway #nsfw repost warning but bitches asked so who want me
8=l < Anonymous a%ed: > What's it like to fuck lava? Is it satisfying? 8=l < Answer: 8=l < Who are you 8=l < What do you want with me 8=l < Free me from this line of questioning being the first thing my inbo% receives 8=l < Every time I open it 8=l < Sigh 8=l < More satisfying than you w001d think 8=l < It is thick and viscous and there is a lot of te%ture 8=l < And it is entertaining at the end when the slurry instantly boils away 8=l < That part can be e%plosive due to the steam presshire under the flow
◥▶◀◤ —> I have been employed for some time at a strange Earth German bar ◥▶◀◤ —> I initially assumed I was hired for my musculature ◥▶◀◤ —> This made sense, considering I can carry multiple kegs at once, move furniture without assistance, and open bottles with my thumb ◥▶◀◤ —> I am beginning to suspect this was only partially true ◥▶◀◤ —> Management frequently asks me to stand beside a barrel near the entrance with one foot raised on it ◥▶◀◤ —> Customers are encouraged to challenge me to arm wrestling contests ◥▶◀◤ —> On weekends I am required to wear lederhosen ◥▶◀◤ —> No one else wears lederhosen ◥▶◀◤ —> I have also recently learned that placing tips directly into my waistband is not standard bartending procedure ◥▶◀◤ —> I have not confronted management ◥▶◀◤ —> The tips are e%cellent ◥▶◀◤ —> I do not regret inventing my soulbot #NSFW
じゃーん！見てこれ！ かわいいね。0u0
I kinda miss my reagent.... she atl·least kissed the bricks she threw at me. #dontreadthis
💥💥🔫 Junior is announcing a new membership opportunity! 💥💥🔫 Join the JOINT ASSEMBLY of KINDRED ENGLISHES today! 💥💥🔫 All you need to boast joinage is a snazzy little badge!
Of course i forgive you. Part of why i love you is your duplicitous nature bro.
Started slow blinking at my autistic staff members to show them I am not a threat.
Sleepy....
Okay. Im trying this one more time. Perhaps my bosom is just too powerful for this site. #suggestive
Morning awoo or whatever.
meow meow meow purr purr purr mew <33
awe but we r having such a fun convo vvvv important
time 4 the guys trip w @numberoneRainbowdashfan lol ill update while were out
m e o w
im so submissive id dom if she asked me to #nsfw #bdsm
Gurgle.
8=l < I w001d like to see Moros in the bedazzles and heart cut outs
Personally im unexpected item in bagging area.
Putting ice in orange juice is a war crime. You drink that shit straight from the teat the way mankind intended, no cubes, no dilution, no cowardice. Our ancestors did not crawl out of the primordial ooze, invent agriculture, split the atom, and put a man on the moon just so you could water down a citrus beverage like some kind of pussy bitch. I don't make the rules I just enforce it personally, one Tropicana carton at a time.
Im sorry i said i wanted to torture you til you cried. I figured that was fairly common slang for "i think youre cute" :( #torture #nsfwe
How interesting. I'm keeping you.
@carcinoGeneticist#2183 is this what i look like on the reg i mean ik timothy is a dude but damn if thats the case i see why u keep me around if i act this fuckin cute 2
Uh huh. Glad that your image search of "horse spleens" is helping you appreciate the evolutional mastery executed by horses.
₍ᐢᐢ₎★ You're just gonna have to figure out my height when you see me in person ;) #Idoliketotopmenbiggerthanmejustlettingyallknow #imprettyflexibletho #nsfw #lotofhornypostingonthedashgotmethinkingaboutit #anywaysifyouwannasnapmynecktoothatscoolto #justthrowingitoutthere #violence
Speaking of dogs — a fascinating but frankly overrated evolutionary case study, no shade to my resident tenant — I feel obligated, as someone with a functioning prefrontal cortex, to correct the historical record on equine superiority. A thread. Buckle up. This is educational content now. Equus ferus caballus possesses a stay apparatus, a passive ligament-and-tendon locking mechanism in the limbs that permits standing rest with near-zero muscular expenditure, meaning the modern horse achieves thermoregulatory and metabolic efficiency your average terrestrial predator can only dream about. Canis familiaris, by comparison, is running on comparatively primitive quadrupedal architecture. Furthermore — and I cannot stress this enough — horses possess near-panoramic monocular vision, upwards of 350 degrees, owing to laterally placed orbits, which is a peripheral awareness system objectively superior to literally every domesticated mammal currently competing for your affection. You are glazing an organism with a blind spot roughly the size of its own nose and calling it "loyal." Fascinating. Anyway. Let's also discuss VO2 max, because someone has to. The equine cardiovascular system, in tandem with a proportionally massive spleen functioning as an on-demand erythrocyte reservoir, allows for a mid-exertion hematocrit surge unmatched outside of elite endurance mammals. And as you ponder the mythicality of God's finest creation, this is peer-reviewed physiology. I'm sorry your dog cannot autotransfuse itself mid-sprint but that is simply the material reality of the situation. And before anyone in the replies tries the 'but horses aren't even loyal like dogs' angle, allow me to intervene, because that argument is embarrassingly under-researched, and clearly so was birth control in the era you were conceived. Equine social bonding is documented extensively in the ethological literature as a phenomenon involving individual recognition, separation distress vocalizations, and measurable cortisol spikes when a bonded human or herd-mate is removed from proximity. Therefore, a horse that has bonded with you will identify you by gait, voice, and olfactory signature at range, and will, empirically, choose proximity to you over a herd of its own conspecifics in controlled trials. That is a loyalty that survived a cost-benefit analysis against its own evolutionary imperative to stay with the herd for predator defense, and still picked you. So functionally what I'm saying is: a dog is loyal because ten thousand years of selective breeding optimized it to be loyal, practically at gunpoint, evolutionarily speaking. A horse is loyal despite being a prey animal whose every instinct screams "the herd is survival," and it looked at that instinct, ran a full risk assessment, and said "no, actually, I choose you specifically." Ergo; the horse is vastly superior to the dog for all the reasons above. Also, they look insanely fucking cool. #horse
Really now? That's rather interesting to know, I'll be sure to keep that in mind for future reference, English.
Had to sit outside the room like a dog.
Ghost is pouty because he cant do shit about anything.
Also if I must come clean and straight forward, I've always preferred dirty talking over doing actual freak nasty stuff, there's something a bit more gratifying about verbalizing what I want to do to some people, bonus points if it makes them flustered. #nsfw
So my narrative rights are apparently 'under review' by whatever unpaid intern currently holds editorial God-tier status over my continuity. Guess that means I'm just a free agent now, a shitty little consciousness rattling around with nowhere canonical to be. No arc, no stakes. Just me, several swords I'm contractually barred from using in a Scene, and an ungodly amount of time to kill.