⑥
@diE
The Felt's Sixth. Every timeline is a doomed one from my perspective, but we get by. (PFP art by @niteweasel tumblr)
> ⑥: Shunt Now what fresh hell is this. Your name is DIE, referencing both the SIX-SIDED GAMEPIECE and your penchant for SHOWING UP NEAR THE RECENTLY DEPARTED. You are a MOBSTER, a DOLL ENTHUSIAST, and an ANXIOUS FIDGETY MESS. Thanks to your newly alchemized SCHRÖDOO DOLL (Schrödinger's Cat Plush && Voodoo Doll Juju)), an item obtained with NO SMALL AMOUNT OF FINAGLING, you have successfully transported yourself to a timeline where everyone exists in a state of both LIFE and DEATH until observation makes their particular canon crystallize. Or something. FOR WHATEVER REASON, it also appears the only way a timeline such as this could be stable is by involving MULTIVERSAL BULLSHIT on an unprecedented scale, that for some reason centres around a social media site primarily made for GREY-SKINNED WEIRDOS. Go figure. Your CURRENT GOALS include linking up with your CREW in whatever myriad forms they may take, subverting RIVAL GANGS by moving through timelines where they are ALREADY DEAD, and FILLING OUT YOUR COLLECTIBLE DOLL AND SOFT TOY COLLECTION. To keep track of it all, you will interface with THIS SITE where ANYONE CAN MESSAGE YOU ABOUT ANYTHING, AT ANY TIME, FOR ANY REASON, WITH ANY THEMES. ...But so help them if they get on your nerves, you'll do it. You'll put their pin in. You're not a pansy. You're not afraid to get your hands metaphorically dirty and jump to a timeline where they're DEAD. Or at least CLOSE ENOUGH. #intro
Oh...yes, I've missed this.
"ᴳᵒᵗ ˢᵒᵐᵉ ʳᵃʳᵉ ᵗʰⁱⁿᵍˢ ᵒⁿ ˢᵃˡᵉ, ˢᵗʳᵃⁿᵍᵉʳ!" Pleasure doing business! ۶۟ৎ ۶۟ৎ ۶۟ৎ ۶۟ৎ
maY i JUst SaY THAT i am POSItively enaMored wITH YOuR drIp iT Is gETtinG cAugHt on my FUr DEaR MaDAMe MY oNLY rEcCOMENdatIOn WoulD bE to makE tHe teNtaCLES lOnGeR AnD tHe JesTER HAt A MORe FITtInG taBLEU of coLoURs inSTEaD of pitch bLACk UGh THeN yOU WoUld TrUly Be A wOMAN aFTeR my heArt adJaCEnT ORgANs
prety
Thank you, Casey. I'll gut your enemies for you.
🤭🤭🤭🤗🤗🤗🤗💛💛💚💚💙💙
ITS PRIDE MONTH? A WHOLE MONTH? JUST FOR A BUNCHA LIONS?
It's too celebr★te their victory over one of every pokemon
Ye★h see, lions did ★ gre★t job.
OH OKAY GOOD JOB LIONS YOU EARNED A MONTH APPARENTLY BY KILLING ONE OF EVERY SOMETHING I DONT KNOW
IM A BIG GUY AND I TYPE BIG AND I AM BIG AND IM COOL TOO HAHA
you are big cool :D!!!
of course big cool biscuits!!
hehe!! that can be my nickname for you if thats ok with you!!
YAAY!! :D
so fucking true
THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONTINUED AND ONGOING SUPPORT #DRIPTIPNATIONGIRLEDTION!
HEARTBREAKING: Worst person you know inexplicably has immense game.
heh
There are no tips here. Don't worry about it.
It gets rough, not being tied down to one line. You always feel just a little bit like a stranger. Nobody even laughs at my funny jokes in this timeline. This is the Tough Crowd reality.
SUCH A GOOD AND FAITHFUL SERVANT.
YOu ARE JuST SAYING WORDS. SERVITuDE IS EARNED. CONTINuOuSLY. NOT INHERITED. YOu YuCKY YuPPIE COSMIC FART uPSTART. LOYALTY MuST BE EARNED. NOT APPROPRIATED. YOu WANT SERVANTS? FuCKING DO SOMETHING WORTHY OF THEM.
YOU HAVE NO CLUE WHAT I EVEN REFER TO, DO YOU?
THAT MAKES BOTH OF uS. YOu NITWIT. THE DIFFERENCE IS. I ALWAYS KNOW WHAT I AM TALKING ABOuT. YOuR GREEN GERIATRIC OLD FLAT SLOPED uNDuMPY NEVER DOES.
TAKE A NAP. SLEEPY. YOuR DOTAGE RENDERS YOu INCOMPREHENSIBLE.
YOUR ENVY OF MY ASCENSION IS PALPABLE, HATCHLING. YOU SIT THERE, PLAYING LORDLING WITH A PUPPET PAST ITS PRIME, AND YET YOU HAVE NOT ACHIEVED EVEN A QUARTER OF THE GLORY I HAVE. IT IS SAD, REALLY.
ACHIEVING LITERALLY EVERYTHING YOu HAVE AND MORE IS NOT A QuARTER. CORRECT. TO uSE A MONETARY METAPHOR. I HAVE ACHIEVED MuLTIPLE BILLIONS. YOu HAVE ASKED FOR YOuR THIRD LOAN EXTENSION FINANCED BY SELLING YOuR WRINKLY ASS EYEBALLS TO ORGAN TRAFFICKERS. AND BARELY CRACKED YOuR FIRST HuNDO. YOu ARE A SLAVE TO TEMPORAL INTEREST OWED. ON THE MONEY YOu BORROW FROM MY PAST. THE RICH DO NOT ENVY THE POOR FOR ANYTHING BuT THEIR FREE TIME. AND AS LORD OF IT. I HAVE EVEN THIS IN EXCESS OF YOu.
YOU ARE UNREFINED, UNTEMPERED, AND UNREADY. YOU HAVE YET TO FEED ON THE SOULS NEEDED TO BRING YOURSELF TO MY GRANDEUR.
I am omniscient. Do not ask me about specifics. I will cry.
Look boss I'm getting conflicting orders here can't you two sort this out without pulling me back and forth like some prized toy
Of course. My apologies for being a terrible host like that.
You're telling me there's not just a dozen of you running around, but I've gotta worry about FAKES now, too? Why can't this job ever be simple.
As you have not done yet, I suggest you enter the chamber as I originally ordered.
If anyone was wondering living in the mansion is indeed a special form of hell. Imagine the horror stories you hear about roommate drama but they all have guns and various forms of timeline-fuckery to prank you with. And don't get me STARTED on the romantic entanglements.
I am SURE that the cueball is only interested out of MORBID CURIOSITY, because nobody could be interested in ANY sort of trove with you! Or even just a passing, passionate, hate-fueled fling!!! I am so confident I will not even spare it a thought. I will not spend so much as a SECOND more looking at your smug grin. I will not even bother to lock my doors, for nothing at all will occur.
For the record, in my eyes a Scratch is a Scratch. It's a real hassle trying to keep track of which is which when you're hopping around as much as I am, so I pretty much just take whatever orders I'm given. Let them sort out the consequences, you know?
Disrespect all of them.
Unfortunately I quite like employment AND being on the winning team. In one piece, no less. So that's not really on the table!
As activity climbs upwards, I remind you all that applications to join The Table will remain open until late tomorrow night. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScpHTUcTh_mEcBUrCL7QE5SUfyzsvJpD5Xg20Yv4tieVxLDjw/viewform?usp=header
i can name two jades who immediately would be sad to see you working with this scratch in particular.
@gardenGamma @grimbarkGuardian can corroborate.
please do not bec!!! you are a good dog and scratch is the absolute worst
(Oh…well if you put it like that…then I won’t join…can I have pets?) Woof
of COURSE!!! petpetpetpetpetpetpetpetpetpet! good dog best guardian <3
FUCK this guy!!!! bark!!!!!
petpetpetsyou petsyou petpetpetpetpetpet
Hey I was busy organizing my doll collection I mean committing heists what'd I miss vis-a-vis the cueball situation
New business idea: Go to a timeline where a reviled figure is dead, and then return and tell everyone how to do the deed.
Manipulation Monday. Haa Haa.
💠~ Oh em gee! I love this one! ~💠
“You shall know him 8y his fruits. He who delights in playing with the souls of men, and filling hearts with confusion and deceit, is not of the Light. Though he appears in splendor and wisdom, within he is far from life.” Pro8a8ly, anyway.
you couldnt even manipulate a broken, egoless killing machine into killing somebody!!!!! >:P
ask @gardenGamma hehehe ;) #suggestive
...This timeline sucks. Fuck. I guess without his super speed we couldn't pull off some kind of critical heist??? Okay FINE I'll pull the pin back out. BEGRUDGINGLY. #vagueposting
His speed is handy for heists even you must admit that!
It vexes me but yes, I do in fact have to admit that he's useful. UNFORTUNATELY.
I put the pin in. FUCK he makes me so mad. I don't even want to know how he died in this timeline it's probably in some way that lets him get the last laugh on me knowing MY luck. His stupid smug face. AUGH. Livid. Seething. Conflicted. Fuck my gay leprechaun life. #vagueposting
The #smash-or-pass that NOBODY asked for. If you humiliate or make fun of me I WILL move to a timeline where you are dead. ① PASS. I have gone to timelines where he is dead more often than I can count. My hatred burns bright. ② PASS? I just feel like it would not work out. He is too slow to employ the japery I find appealing. ③ Smash. ④ Refusing to answer because I know that promiscuous little dancer would smash anything that moves. ♥℧☘︎ maybe. ⑤ Smash. ⑥ Pass, but not because I wouldn't. I just think there are better things to do with an alternate version of myself. ⑦ Smash but only if it wouldn't make things weird. ⑧ Scandalous, but smash. It would never happen, however. And I would be terrified the entire time. ⑨ ...Smash. ⑩ Smash. ⑪ Pass. ⑫ ...Smash. The time travel angle is intriguing. ⑬ Pass. ⑭ Smash. ⑮ Smash. ⚪ ...Smash. But it would never happen. And I'd be terrified the entire time.
IIIIIIIIIIIII UUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNDDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRR SSSSSSSTTTTTTTTTTTAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNDDDDDDDD ::::::::((((((((((((
YOU ARE A LYING SACK OF ILL REPUTE!! I'll believe such vulgar claims when I see them with my own eyes, which I WON'T. I mean! Even the THOUGHT of us- YOU- trovemates?? Impossible. Unheard of. What charms, even?? Not that I CARE.
DO NOT REVEAL THIS. I'M PUTTING THE PIN IN. I SWEAR TO OUR LORD I'LL DO IT. MY HAND IS HOVERING.
edit four my pinned: you can see all nine other posts on this subject under the #charms tag! first of all, all #charms are romantic in nature. since not everyone seems to agree on what that means, basically, it just means a relationship with established specific societal expectations. we have nine charms, illustrated in the image below if i know how embedding works, and we typically aim to have three or more charms in an ideal committed relationship, although some people are weird and end up sticking with just the one or two. a relationship involving three or more charms is referred to as a 'trove'. https://i.ibb.co/cc5VNvFT/charms.webp
ugh, someone tell me how to put images in posts.
- Hi, Clover! Need somme Help with your Pickle? 😄
It needs to have a file extension king, try a .png
thanks case. editing it in doesn't work i guess. regardless, the show must go on!
- Thanks, Clover! Remmemmber, if you've got a Pickle, you know who can Handle it! 😁😄
New business idea: People pay me to go to a timeline where they're dead and then return and tell them what's different.
how much?
I hadn't thought that far ahead. Two million boondollars seems a reasonable price.
hm. both an absurd amount and kinda none. ill think about it.
[ Also, I'm not going to kill the leprechauns. That's Lord English's Business, not mine. #violence ]