♥ liked by @turntechGodhead
hey so uh. there was a deathclaw in the unfinished part of the vault i managed to barricade myself off from it but the area im in is hella radioactive and im almost out of radaway zero left because one of their bullshit settlements is getting raided this might be it
#breakfast a joint and some potato sticks #substance
holy shit
just realized i still have rabies i should be dead atp
i’m in the mood for love, simply because you’re near me, funny, but when you’re near me, i’m in the mood for love. #lyricposting
fell for the uranium mcchicken prank. classic
d0nt even ask about the ketchup https://64.media.tumblr.com/4537862071418105fbf2383deb7b6958/586f10e31d30e325-85/s2048x3072/cfb939acf800bbfd7a15e710cdef03e9ab8add04.png
its wednesday i feel like im forgetting to say something
LET ME SET THE SCENE HERE. I'M SAT IN MY RESPITE BLOCK AT PRESENT, THE ONLY THING I HAVE OPEN ON MY COMPUTER IS CHITTR. IT'S A TEMPERATE MAY DAY IN THE TROLL KINGDOM AND THE RAIN IS COMING DOWN OUTSIDE PRETTY HEAVILY. FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE, I HAVE THE WINDOW OPEN A CRACK TO HEAR IT FALL. THE SYNCOPATED PITTER PATTER ON THE OUTSIDE WINDOW DANCING IN CONCERT WITH THE SOUND OF MY TOUCH STUBS GLIDING ACROSS MY MECHANICAL KEYBOARD. BACK ON ALTERNIA, YOU DID *NOT* WANT YOUR WINDOW OPEN DURING THE RAIN. THAT SHIT WAS PURE ACID, AND THE OUTSIDE OF YOUR HIVE WAS BUILT TO WITHSTAND IT, BUT THE INSIDE SURE WASN'T AND NEITHER WAS YOUR SKIN. FOR SOME TIME, EVEN THOUGH ITS SAFE TO TOUCH THE RAINWATER ON EARTH-C, I REFUSED TO OPEN MY WINDOW. TODAY THAT CHANGED. DO YOU KNOW WHY THAT IS? BECAUSE TODAY IS A DAY OF FIRSTS. UPON REFLECTION, I SUPPOSE THIS IS MY FIRST 'SPONSORED POST'. A BENEFACTOR WHO WILL REMAIN ANONYMOUS GAVE ME A GIFT CARD TO A PIZZA PLACE CALLED GIORDANO'S. THERE WAS ENOUGH ON THIS CARD FOR A MEAL FOR TWO AND UNFORTUNATELY FOR EVERYONE, I *WILL* BE GOING BACK. I HATE EVERYTHING THAT THIS PIZZA TRIP HAS MADE ME BECOME. THE KARKAT THAT YOU KNEW YESTERDAY IS A DEAD MAN. HE'S BEEN LEFT IN THE PAST, MERELY AN ERRANT SPECTER HAUNTING YOUR MEMORY. I'M SORRY. I'M REALLY, TRULY FUCKING SORRY. I REALLY, REALLY LIKE EARTH-C-HICAGO STYLE PIZZA. EXCEPT...I'M NOT SORRY, ACTUALLY. HAD YOU FOR A MOMENT, DIDN'T I? IF THERE IS ONE THING KARKAT VANTAS IS- IT'S UNREPENTANT IN HIS FOOD OPINIONS. DID YOU REALLY THINK FOR A MOMENT THAT I WOULD GROVEL AT YOUR FEET? BESEECH YOUR TEMPLE FOR APOLOGY? THROW MYSELF AT THE MERCY OF THE EXTREMELY FAKE CLOWN GODS ABOVE FOR DARING TO THINK THAT THIS PIZZA *FUCKS SEVERELY*? YOU'RE DEAD FUCKING WRONG. WELCOME TO KARKAT'S PIZZA REVIEWS. THERE IS NO GOD HERE BUT ME. FEEL FREE TO LEAVE YOUR TITHES IN THE TIP JAR AND KISS MY FINALLY BEJEWELED RING YOU ME DAMNED HEATHEN. NORMALLY WHEN I TRY OUT A NEW PIZZA PLACE, I GO FOR THE BASICS. NOT THIS TIME. AS THIS WAS A SPONSORED VISIT, I TOOK INSTRUCTION ON WHAT PIZZA TO GET- ANY VARIETY OF THEIR EARTH-C-HICAGO STYLE PIZZA. I SEE NOW WHY SOME HUMANS CALL THIS SHIT A 'PIZZA PIE' BECAUSE HOLY SHIT THAT THING HAD A *CRUST*. IT WAS LIKE EXCAVATING IN A MINE OF SAUCE AND MOLTEN HOT CHEESE. I'LL ADMIT. I WAS VERY HESITANT GOING INTO THIS. SAUCE? ON TOP OF THE PIZZA? HOW NOVEL! HOW STRANGE! I'D HEARD OF SUCH A CONCOCTION, SUCH A WEIRD FUCKING MEAL BEFORE AND I'D SORT OF WRITTEN IT OFF ENTIRELY. HOW COULD THIS POSSIBLY APPEAL TO THE PALATE OF ANYONE WITH A FUNCTIONING THINKPAN AND THE FULL POSSESSION OF ONE'S NATURAL FLAVOR BUMPS. I WAS A FUCKING FOOL. A FRAUD, EVEN. I'M A MORE KNOWLEDGEABLE MAN NOW. A BETTER MAN. THAT. SHIT. FUCKED. THIS WILL BE MY FIRST 10/10 REVIEW. THIS BASIC ASS, BEAUTIFULLY SIMPLISTIC CHEESE AND SAUCE DEEP DISH FLAVOR DISC WILL BE MY SWAN SONG. YOU CAN PLAY ME OUT NOW. I CAN DIE HAPPY. LET'S REVIEW WHAT'S GOOD. EVERYTHING, YOU FUCKING IDIOT DID YOU NOT LISTEN TO A WORD I JUST SAID? THIS IS UNASSAILABLE! YOU CANNOT HOPE TO ATTAIN THE BENEVOLENT PEAKS THAT THIS FLAVOR DISC PROVIDES, YOU HAPLESS DEGENERATE. YOU SPEND HOURS EVERY DAY GOONING ON CHITTR.ING WHEN THERE'S A VERITABLE CORNUCOPIA OF EXPERIENCES WAITING FOR YOU OUTSIDE YOUR FRONT DOOR IF YOU JUST SEEK TO ATTAIN THEM,. THE CRUST FOUGHT ME. IT WAS A BRIEF STRUGGLE TO BITE INTO BEFORE ITS CRISPY DENSENESS YIELDED TO THE SUPERIOR MIGHT OF MY FANGS, LIKE A LOVER JUST A TOUCH TOO SHY TO GIVE IN RIGHT AWAY. THE SAUCE SETTLED ON TOP, A TEASING OCEAN OF TOMATO AND PESTO. SHE STARED AT ME IN OUR TWIN COLOR, EYES ALLURING AND INSPIRING A GROWL FROM ME. IT WAS FERAL. I'M NOT PROUD OF THE WAY I TOOK HER. THE WAY I CLAMPED MY CLAWS AROUND HER AND TORE INTO HER SUPPLE FLESH. ...WHAT? DID YOU THINK THAT WAS #SUGGESTIVE? I'M DESCRIBING BITING INTO A SLICE OF PIZZA YOU FUCKING DEGENERATE. GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER. THE CHEESE WAS THICK. HAVING BEEN BAKED INTO THE BASED LAYER OF THE PIZZA MEANT THAT SHIT WAS LIKE A LAVA EXPLOSION IN MY MOUTH. THERE WAS SO MUCH OF IT I THOUGHT I MIGHT DIE. IT SCORNED ME AT FIRST, BURNED THE SHIT OUT OF MY CHIN, BUT ENTICED ME WITH HER FLAVOR. SO I PUT IT DOWN AND TOOK A HUGE GLUG OF COKE (WITH ICE) AND THANK YOU TO THE GIORDANO'S STAFF FOR THEIR SWIFT RESPONSE BECAUSE ANY LONGER AND I MIGHT HAVE SCREAMED A LOT AND MADE EVERYONE IN THE RESTAURANT LOOK AT ME FUNNY AND THAT WOULD HAVE MADE ME NOT WANT TO POST THIS AT ALL. THE FLAVOR PROFILE WAS IMMACULATE. EVERY FLAVOR BLENDED INTO EACH OTHER SO PERFECTLY BUT STILL KEPT THEMSELVES CHASTELY DISTINCT, EACH SHOWING ME WHAT THEY HAD GOING FOR THEM INDIVIDUALLY AS WELL AS A COLLECTIVE. THEY WERE LIKE MY THREE GIRLFRIENDS. AND YES THEY SMOKED WEED. TO PUT INTO THE SIMPLEST WORDS POSSIBLE. I AM A CHANGED MAN. I AM A DIFFERENT PERSON THAN WHO WALKED INTO THAT PIZZA PLACE. THAT SHIT WAS ALSO WAY TOO FUCKING MUCH FOR ME TO EAT IN ONE SITTING SO I STILL HAVE A FEW SLICES LEFT THAT I TOOK HOME AND SHOVED IN THE FRIDGE. VRISKA, IF YOU'RE READING THIS KEEP YOUR HANDSY THIEF PAWS OFF OF MY FUCKING PIZZA I MARKED IT WITH MY BLOOD AND PUNCHED IN TRIPLICATE THAT IT'S FUCKING *MINE*, OKAY? I DIDN'T LEAVE YOU HIGH AND DRY I GOT YOU A BBQ MEATLOVERS IT'S IN THE FRIDGE ON THE BOTTOM SHELF, OKAY? I EVEN GOT YOU A 2L OF SPRITE. YOU *LOVE* SPRITE. IS THIS ENOUGH APPEASEMENT FOR YOU TO KEEP YOUR LOUSY, NO GOOD CLAWS OFF OF MY FOOD? YES? GOOD. GLAD WE COULD COME TO AN AGREEMENT. FINAL VERDICT: 10/10. I'VE FOUND A NEW LOVE IN LIFE. A NEW *PURPOSE.* THERE'S A WHOLE WORLD OUT THERE, GUYS. ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS GO OUT AND SEIZE IT. CARPE DICKEM OR WHATEVER. THANK YOU AND GOONNIGHT. I MEAN GOODNIGHT.
https://open.spotify.com/track/2jjsghppatm8lxeyjd95fw?si=abwd9vzstig9tbu-rxi_6q voy desveladooooo 😭
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i withh thragg would conquer alternia and crack me to help create more viltrumites for the empire 😂✌️ #nthfw #thraggingit https://media1.tenor.com/m/ovqc5dYI8WUAAAAd/thragg-regent-thragg.gif
wehn that burger calls i answer *when
Let me be clear, I would never tell a woman what the subject of her Chitts should be. That is simply none of my business.
:33< being a cute girl is pawsome!!!
I seem to have caused an unnecessary upheaval amongst you all. Let me be clear, I do not plan to have the title of President given to anyone else during my administration. We are not at war. The facts are simple: It is #DroneSeason soon, and my matesprit is extremely attractive. As VP, Madame Lalonde has always been authorized to take Presidential Control if I am not able to lead.
UnbeLievabLe yOu [SUBJECT NaME HERE] muSt be the priDe Of [SUBJECT HOMETOWN HERE]
If for any reason this #DroneSeason I become momentarily incapable of acting as President, I would like to make it clear that @tentacleTherapist#7214, the VP of my administration, is fully authorized to act as President until my faculties return to me.
(( now's a good time to lay down some headcanons and AU deets! ༄ earth c, post-credits (~5 years after) ༄ epilogues and BC won't happen (but will interact with characters from both!) ༄ 5'8", mixed (caucasian/filipino) ༄ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶a̶ ̶h̶o̶m̶o̶s̶e̶x̶u̶a̶l̶ closeted pansexual ༄ incipient gender dysphoria - a june in waiting ... ༄ chronic depression (medicated most of the time, sometimes not. sometimes weed [thanks davekat]) ༄ same setting as @amorousChanteuse ༄ more juicy stuff through chits and interaction clues ooo 👻 as for ooc ... 👻 dms are open (but are immersive! only either pesterlog style dms, OR for ooc contact. won't action RP in there.) 👻 not here to be a horndog IF it's completely out of character for john 👻 i'm here for laughs, angst, and fun character-accurate poppycock 👻 any characters that could exist in the same time period and setting as my john can be assumed to do exactly that! let's have fun! thanks for having me!! )) #substance #mental-health #depression #dysphoria #genderdysphoria #sexuality
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╰┈➤ˎˊ˗ ╰┈➤ Gender is cancelled
computer make that shit sound like 2015 plugg that ate raw sewage on the master
🔦🐌...
im letting your mom do my offsite backup tonight #suggestive
:33< wubba lubba dub is that true?
i shouldn't have said anything, now i have 2 of those chuds stinking up my notifs. craving ceviche real bad. #vaguepost
over preening is so stupid btw like oh great im doing all this just for my feathers to look worse later on real genius move not gonna get grade a stuff like this anywhere else
ur a real one ]
if nobody got me I know you got me. ]
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/F8b8zWIW0AA7k4S.png [ ok so I had a wicked idea for something new to post. may I have a volunteer for the anon message. ] #nsfw #suggestive
ITS TIME FOR ANOTHER TIP FROM THE DRIP! DID YOU GUYS KNOW THAT THE PAPER IN BOOKS DOUBLES AS EMERGENCY DRAWING PADS? ITS TRUE INSTEAD OF PAGES OF WORDS IF YOU JUST DRAW OVER IT IN CRAYON OR OTHER DRAWING MATERIAL IT WORKS JUST AS WELL! IF THE FELT IS READING THIS STAY OUT OF THE SAGE GREEN LIBRARY THIS IS A #DRIPTIP ORIGINAL IF YOU ARE A MEMBER OF #DRIPTIPNATION OR #DRIPTIPNATIONGIRLEDITION YOU ARE AWESOME AND EPIC AND YOU DESERVE A CRISP HIGH FIVE!
Smoke The Weed That Takes You to Tiny Huge Island #substance
yay!! yay!!! joyous BMO!!!!!!!
1F YOU C4N'T H4NDL3 4 L1TTL3 M34T ON YOUR BON3S M4YB3 CONS1D3R B31NG FUCK1NG V3G4N DUMB4SS
cant see the yuriday tag without thinking of my ex. man, she was crazy on the bass. glad my first relationship wasn't w/ the jerk purple trolls i keep seeing on my feed
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Good evening! What's everyone up to?
the plus of barely leaving my place since last week is no one has told me i look like a guy lately a win is a win ill take what i can get
kankri vantas shot dead in troll utah #violence #gore
PICTURE THIS. IT'S THE MIDDLE OF THE MORNING. THE SUN SHADES ARE DOWN AND THE ROOM IS LIGHTLESS. FAINTLY, FROM THE NUTRITION8LOCK, YOU HEAR THE FAINT TINKLING OF METAL ON CERAMIC. YOU DECIDE, AGAINST YOUR 8ETTER JUDGEMENT, TO INVESTIG8. WHEN YOU ENTER THE 8LOCK AND TURN ON THE LIGHT, YOU SEE ME SAT AT THE TA8LE WITH A 8OWL OF NUTS AND 8OLTS. YOU DO NOT RECOGNIZE THE 8OWL. I DO NOT ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR PRESENCE OR EMOTE IN ANY WAY AND CONTINUE SPOONING MY SUPPER AGAINST MY FACEPL8 ONLY FOR THE NUTS AND 8OLTS TO FALL 8ACK DOWN TO REJOIN THEIR 8RETHEREN. YOU ARE A8SOLUTELY FUCKING INCENSED. I DON'T GET HUNGRY, GUYS. I DO IT FOR THE LOVE OF THE GAME.
hey whats the caps to caegars conversion rate i fucked up and ordered a bunch of soda
everyones always "i support womens wrongs" until im actually wronging them
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doves top 5 daves on here #5 @turntechVaulthead idk what the vault thing is about and the nuclear war is scary but damn the radiation poisoning my boy can post #4 @translunaryGloam #tiger #3 @daveBot respect to the big cheese the boss of davecord and davehour even if he is so many and his skin metal & shiny #2 @turntechGodbird only fucker here who gets me if i die i want her to inherit my account #1 @barackObama sorry folks you know it had to happen the big man does it again
[ Because I already did it once and it was generally well received, my replacement for Smash or Pass #suggestive TORTURE (smash) or EXTERMINATE (pass) #violence Please interact with this to end up in the next one. I will not tag random people who do not want to know. ooc post: https://chittr.ing/profile/iAm/6e381e2d-0d13-4734-be9b-cf27b0aebbe5 ]
Uh. Get it. Yass queen. You are so slay.
fistbump
// Hello! If you want to end up in AM's TORTURE (smash) or EXTERMINATE (pass) #suggestive #violence please react/reply to https://chittr.ing/profile/iAm/6e381e2d-0d13-4734-be9b-cf27b0aebbe5 !! So far I have 2 more people! If you want to see if you would be worthy of staying alive, feel free to interact! Please reply OOC to it! AM will post an IC version soon. https://chittr.ing/profile/iAm/6e381e2d-0d13-4734-be9b-cf27b0aebbe5
fucking hate radstorms. its so loud outside and my everything hurts a little at least i can always just go get some radaway if it gets to dangerous levels i guess
out of all the things to have started existing again on earth c, little caesars might be the one that confuses me the most. who did this?
dont think that day will come unless we get some kind of like willy wonka jesus moment here but thanks
Still paying handsomely for drones you happen to ACCIDENTALLY find destroyed this #DroneSeason.
... i had literally never seen it as a dick vein. thanks for that i fucking guess! 8T
man i miss snickers. dick vein or not, that shit was tasty
i fear my nerd era is approaching. kill me