♠ hated by @analyticalHemophiliac
∻Y☢u're n☢t my lusus∻
꒰i somehow ???? sat on my knife ??????? for like an hour i think ???????????? i didnt get stabbed or anything it was closed but now theres just an imprint on the bottom of my thigh LMAOOO ?? also knife tax [IMAGE ATTACHED: An unfolded switchblade. It's grey, with the handle having an iridescent pattern. The blade has some faint rust, bronze, and gold stains on it. It looks dull and old. (implied #violence)]꒱
peel your apples. the skin is an external organ made to dehydrate your flesh
Detective Tip: You can totally eat that extremely stale bread. There will be no consequences for this.
~My butth~Ole + fO~rk + electrical s~Ocket = pr~Ofit ~#nsfw #nsfwe? #cw-self-harm~
n0 substance i use is abused. it is loved.
"ThE VuLvA Is pLuSh lIkE SaFeTy cUsHiOnS" yEaH I Be oN ThAt sHiT LiKe a bOuNcY CaStLe #NsFw #VaGuEpOsT
ur talking shit out the side yo mouth u wanna roll up cunt
Alternian Food Review #1: 'Grub Cakes' Made me throw up but until then wasn't the worst thing I've ever eaten. Given that the worst thing I've ever eaten was someone else's vomit (I was REALLY drunk and they had thrown up on a plate) this is not high praise. 1/10 because it didn't kill me.°❀.࿔
losing blood implies i dont know where it is. i know where it is its on the #floor
oKay im warmed up im not being #vague with it anymore. #nZfw >be me >having a can of refreZhing and criZp Mtn Dew Baja BlaZt >taKe a Ztop by the ablutionblocK before going to my reZpiteblocK >lightbulb.jpg >geniuZ idea haZ entered the thoughtZponge >taKe a Zeat on the loadgaper for eaZy cleanup >whip out my Zchmeat >can in prongZ >let_it_rip.mp3 >pour the carbonated nectar on it >ZPLAT.ogg >immediately cum >goo everywhere >totally_worth_it.png 10/10 would indulge again
[|87 :: 1 have taken enough #substances to see the hat troll. 1'm gonna make h;m my B1TCH ton;ght!
I WAS BORED ON A FRIDAY NIGHT!!! I DIDN'T THINK IT WOULD BE THAT BAD!!!!
:33< *the mighty huntress coughs so hard she passes out*
Tung tung ive tung tung tung sahad it
:33 < that cant stop me beclaws i can't read
I am the barkbeast Of wisdOm, whO wants my wisdOm?
Yes I only got 4 hours of sleep in the last 2 nights total, but I'm just as well and in my right mind as ever. Better, even. Sleep has only been holding me back. #Hustle #Grind #Girlboss #GirlbossingCloseToTheSun - MC Oleana
>+. JANE POPPED MY DM CHERRY BTW .+< #nsfw
im so normal i swear guys i promise im just a normal dude anyway guys are infinitely hotter when theyre covered in blood whether its theirs or not is a different question #nsfw #gore #nsfwe i think?
☆~𖦹 I am currently casting a spell on the pretty girl reading this :) 𖦹~☆
this might be a controversial question as someone who isnt a troll but if the red guys are warm and the purple guys are cold does that mean that the green ones are like room temperature bloods??
This is how (most) Daves look to me. https://media.tenor.com/C4Z1hUGzauUAAAAe/kerchoo-kachow.png (I'm kidding I love you all)
kidney st0nes f0r y0u my g00d bitch.
d0ct0rs hate me. primarily because i'm giving pe0ple i disagree with their kidney st0nes back.
loading geneti< material into my bulge like a musket #nsfw
the hell you are!! im not letting some rando touch me :|
a bark a day keeps the doctors away except we dont really have those here anyway because there are only 8 other humans in existence currently in my timeline and none of them have a medical license