Phuntr Guynax
@consequentlyOblique
guaranteed chittr shitposter. tickler of the funny chitin and certifiable chud. also i am the green ranger btw #teamchud
IF THE WORLD WAS ENDING I'D WANNA BE NEXT TO YOOOOOOOOOU IF THE PARTY WAS OVER AND OUR TIME ON ALTERNIA WAS THROOOOOOUGH #brunomarspowerhour
Don't worry! I can ALWAYS check up on you, and always will! When you're on a walk, or in your sleep, or when you don't know it, or— EVERYWHERE!!! You are never alone~! Heh heh. :}
my fatal character flaw is that i kind of fuck with troll bruno mars' music. sorry to disappoint everyone.
no i eat the bread until it gets stuck in my throat and then i drink some milk
#phuntasks just because i have one sititng here and it'S from chchow @xxScenegrlxx asks "xx_HAI_PHUNTR_WATZ_UR_FAV_KINDA_BREKFAST_FOOD_ASKING_FOR_YUMY_BREAKFSBT_REASONS_xx" - it depends. some day'S i like a big full fucking meal. hogbeast meat, toast, eggs, that kinda stuff. some days it'S just pancakes. other days a monster energy (sometimes with a cigarette if i'M feeling whacky). https://forms.gle/yjfbpDLkqtMNtpmo6
#phuntasks got a few more of these in the burner. anon asks "do you like BOYYYSSSSS heheheheh" - yeah dude. i swing all ways. shoot your shot @grimbarkGuardian asks "shes ok right? i just want to make sure... also tell her that when shes ready to come out again i might have a name!!" - will do. also follow me so you don'T have to ask in a fucking public form next time https://forms.gle/QbkknXnbADWPx1y57
#phuntasks Anon asks "DO YOU HATE ME????" - no. i don'T. kys asks "Why do you hate me" masterCuller obviously hi hello. asks "Why" - pretty sure these are both you so addressing them at once. i don'T. @tiptappingApathy asks "⬭ what is ewer favorite game. ⬭" - i find myself quite partial to most independent games. either the binding of troll isaac, or the lesser known la mulana. i also like metal gear solid 3: slitherbeast eater. The Ghoul asks "You got any chips in your hive?" - i am currently in possession of four sunset sasparilla star bottlecaps. anon asks "boooo you suck" - just admit you are scared when i make money moves and the fact that i have immense upward mobility ↗️ https://forms.gle/wxXEUmMdpGMpbtTj7
![Avatar](https://i.ibb.co/KYTLyF4/96-sin-t-tulo-20260513135123.jpg")
ᡕᠵデᡁ᠊╾━_ >! h/\v≡ n0 《 lu≡ wh0 《 0uldv≡ /\sk≡d th0s≡ tw0 b≡f0r≡ m!n≡ (just k!dd!ng, ! kn0w ≡x/\《 tly wh0 !t w/\s /\nd y0u kn0w t00) >! just w/\nt t0 《 l/\r!fy th/\t my "why" w/\s 《 0mpl≡t≡ly !nd!v!du/\l /\nd s≡p/\r/\t≡ fr0m th0s≡ 0th≡r tw0 /\nd ¡ w/\s /\《 tu/\lly r≡f≡r≡n《 !ng /\ r≡ply ! m/\d≡ t0 0n≡ 0f y0ur 《 h!tts.
give me exactly 3. maybe 4 questions. thanks. then i'LL be busy so you do NOT want to miss this once in a lifetime chance to ask phuntr guynax ANYTHING #phuntasks https://forms.gle/NaPgHzSjimNisAKL8
and DONE okay did anyone record the time? did i break a record?
SIX MINUTES. THAT'S LONGER THAN SOME #COLLABS LAST THESE DAYS. [∴]
going to hold my breath under the water will let you guys know when i come back up for air
↘️we are all praying this is your final post.↘️
fill up the ablution trap with water. let it sit for a little. to the point where it'S just past lukewarm. do not remove your clothes. climb into the ablution trap. and that'S where we are. #mychudbath
xx_CHCHOW_DID_THIS_ONCE_AFTER_SHE_GAWT_REALLY_FUCKED_UP_AT_A_CLUUUURBBBBB_xx
⬭ oh. ewe got me. ewe sly barkbeast ewe. now im the one whos never going to recover. ill have to flee the planet and change my name. ⬭
↗️DO NOT WALK BACK YOUR INITIAL OFFER WITH NEEDLESS CLARIFICATION.↗️ ↘️you are clearly wanting for an ablution trap companion.↘️ ↗️C.H.U.D.↗️ ↘️completely hopeless unemployed dimwit.↘️
dude! we'RE about to hit 23 days without someone calling me pissblood! i start climbing up the ladder towards the big sign reading "DAYS WITHOUT PISSBLOOD: 22" i sure hope nobody says anything mean...!
You will always be gold to me, Big Phunt.
IS·THIS·YOVR·VERSION·OF·ASKING·TO·BE·CALLED·PISSBLOOD·YOV·VALKING·VRINE·DEPOSITORY·PASTRY
okay last ones for now #phuntasks @realdraculaFlow asks "turned his mother into a butternut squash tried to cook her shit was fire with salt saw homie blowing rings with his skooma bros, so I sliced em up, ready for the pot who wouldnt do the same" -told him his bitch looked like a walnut the way i'M constantly trying to crack her anon asked "With who you would pail from teamchud?" - you'D think this is the same as the other question, but it'S actually different! i won'T give any specific answers as to not ruin the #shippers out there. but i'D pail maybe two of them. potentially a 3rd but it'S #scary
okay. if we hit ten i'LL stop for a little bit since i think the feed is coming alive a little more (that means after this, 2 more questoins). #phuntasks anonymous asks "fuck marry kill teamchud members you can do more than one in terms of fucking marrying or killing #nsfw" - i was thinking of adding some preface to what i mean by these answers but it'S funnier to give them to you raw @naughtyTechnician - marry @nicheLarper - kill @militaristicGeek - marry @goldenGigabyte - marry @tentativelyTenebrous - pail @graciousChampion asks "do you rub your little phuntr up and down until goo comes out #thescript " - i do not think they actually typed this message out to me and in making me reply to this you'RE going to start beef between me and some near-omniscient fucking person. also yes. alright get me one more in and we'LL wrap it up until later or something: https://forms.gle/oZgwZVYLp7dHkht18
>it’s so better than pail trust >this is because i =w=as given the marry
~Ykn~Ow I'm fO~llO~wing the script tag s~O this was really really funny t~O see pO~p up~
realized i should tag these #phuntasks so you can mute it if you don'T give a fuck. @computerCannibal asks "WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COMPUTER VIRUS?? XD" - i find myself quite partial to a trojan in terms of the delivery method, and in terms of the actual virus, i think keyloggers are cool. 'yourMove' (not a real account) asks "If you were challenged to a shadow game (a mystically enhanced game where you die if you get caught cheating or lose) what game would you prefer it be?" - classic question. my cop out answer would be something like "a coin flip" because i'M under the impression the odds are pretty stacked against me otherwise. but in the spirit of answering earnestly, troll magic the gathering commander (we'RE dragging two more people into the shadow game than necessary), some kind of fighting game (perhaps troll street fighter?) or... ddr. thanks for the questions. https://forms.gle/1tfLqebxQgxXdPNF9
@naughtyTechnician asks "The moost weird thing yoou can doo with yoour psioonics 8?" - going to show a moment of vulnerability here to state that my psionics are actually a little limited and i can pretty much only use them on things that are magnetic. however, one time my friend wanted to get a piercing, so they got their little rod thing to be specially made out of magnetic material (which is atypical!). very carefully i shot it into the side of their nose and pierced it perfectly. we were both worried i was going to just blitz it straight fucking through but it turned out okay. didn'T even really hurt, apparently? it was a good time. if anyone else wants to ask some, go for it: https://forms.gle/xeYGcUCwSRHu4FT89
alright we got a few let'S do it. AT asks "Why not renaming yourself as a thumper?" - i would reuse my "hardly know her joke" here but we'VE done that a little too recently. instead i'LL say this - i'LL thump you if you keep it up (not in a sexual way). Anon asks "If a powerful trans dimensional being came down and said he needed to recruit you as a troll with radical attitude to transform and defeat evil in a giant mech, what would be your response?" - i think i would have to be out of my fucking mind to not want to get in an awesome giant fucking mech. and i'D pilot it sooo good too. we don'T even need to add in the whole 'defeat evil' thing i would do it just for fun. good question, anon. anon asked "how does it feel being the awesome cool leader of #teamchud?" - you know, it'S nice to get some fucking recognition around here for once. i'M pretty confident there'S no doubt that it'S me. you'RE alright, anon. and no. i did not send this response in to myself.
alright i told myself i wasn'T going to give in to the hype but the feed is slow and literally everyone is fucking doing it. so yeah ask me something interesting and i'LL get around to it. will probably not keep bumping this daily like other people do though. maybe just a today thing. https://forms.gle/DRz7tJ8wNEvxymni7
>>| no love beam. but .i have to say, "enjoy your meal" .in .a very kind way. .i'm .used to this, but .i just can't stand the .outfit .only.
>>| .alright. fine. you can have .address .of my workplace, but do not harass .anyone .else, .especially the boss. latitude: -36.97, longitude: 168.38. .it's the .only maid cafe .in this place.
>>| .i don't know you, so .i'm just making .assumptions. .it .is .also .a standard to .acknowledge new clients, .especially highbloods .in .our residence.