♦ pitied by @tentacleTherapist

8ad 8itches don’t have the time for showering sometimes!
fortunes are bullshit tarots hold about as much flippin wwhimsical foresight in em as a deck of bicycle cards this is just as likely a plot to sign us mortalkind awway to the godengine wwhat feasts on souls to keep trollbama alivve

its... its greased lightning, isnt it? its... ultramatic, its... oh no... oh no...

;)

im beset by dark and foreboding energies. something bad is coming
<action; statement input; statement: thank you for the fortune. input; statement: i wou|d be |ying if i said i expected something optimistic, but this is better than i thought it wou|d be input; statement: that |ast point is very interesting />

oh / yeah / this sounds fun

thank ya friend! 6uess i 6ot a job to do, then... s'pose i mi6ht as well use the rest of my ni6ht piCkin' this up! kind've odd paCka6e dimensions but... nothin' i Can't handle! ^◡^
Thank you. I really needed to hear that, today.

Always happy for a tarot reading I didn't know you were interested in less concretely magical forms of spiritualism Maybe I should talk to my mom about it more
Ah. I suppose I too, will sign up. Honestly, I mostly wish to know if I made the right choice cutting contact with my fathers.

aw shuCks, i'm in! i like this kinda fun stuff! ^◡^

UGH. THIS IS SO AFFIRMING AND INSIGHTFUL THAT IT HURTS. FUCK YOU, LALONDE. FUCK YOU AND YOUR OBSEQUIOUS COLD-READING DISGUISED AS SORCERY. BEZOAR DISINTEGRATED. I'LL DO MY BEST.

A DENSE, PALPABLE BEZOAR OF DREAD SITS AT THE BOTTOM OF MY DIGESTION SAC UPON READING THIS. BUT I'VE NEVER KNOWN YOU TO SUCK AT YOUR STUPID, EDGY, PROGNOSTICATIVE BULLSHIT. DO IT.
are all of those real words?

job hunting except i'm not looking for a job and i'm just actually hunting
ill take one. karkat is next to me and he wants one too. his handle is carcinovantas
hTtPs://mEdIa.tEnOr.cOm/yMoXwP-2e28AaAa1/BeNdEr-fUn.wEbP

curious what you might see hahaha

get back to me on this but yes

I'll bite.

aiight fine do me also im gonna give you some energies to peek for especially like what are the chances id land me a sweet deal with motorcross and or santa cruz and do you see my sbahj comics going further than just newspaper blips

TELL ME MY FUTURE.

ooooh read my fortune please!!

>> ¡'m cur¡ouડ what k¡nd cou1d be

✌️✌️

fine read my fates just knoww im liable to defy them on principle for better or wworse usually wworse
that is a sick name for my next fish, stealin that one real quick
if youre up for it, im dowvn for a readin. newv experiences and all that
oh my god no but its the only way my feathers remain as smooth and not itchy as they do rose you cant do this to me

:33< on the theme of fortmewne telling :33< todays horoscopes :33< ♈ it will rain somewhere today find that purrlace fur inner peace :33< ♉ stay out of caves today if mew wind up in a cave today leo wont help mew :33< ♊ mew will lose a game today sorry get good :33< ♋ its gonna beclawm night at some point fur mew in the next 24 hours :33< ♌ k33p it up leo mew can do no wrong :33< ♍ burry mewrself in soil up to mewre neck if mew do mew can mewse this powpurr to purrdict the weathpurr :33< ♎it will snow at some point somehwere in the next 12 months :33< ♏ mew will develop a random fear of lockpurrs today :33< ♐ mewre mew name is yogurt boss :33< ♑ the stars purrdict that mew will do an epic spin dance and be happy :33< ♒ mew will draw a picture of an elf today :33< ♓ the meowtion of the ocean fortells that at some point the tide will ebb.
SURE, WHATEVER. WHAT'S THE WORST THAT COULD HAPPEN?

stop asking ai for advice and start asking bitches with tarot cards to read your future.







