T3R3Z1 PYROP3

KARKAT VANTAS

5 days ago

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THE. FUCKING. ODYSSEY. LONGTIME READERS AND FIRST-TIME OBSERVERS, I BRING YOU THE #MOVIEKAT REVIEW TO MARK THE FUCKING AGES. I STARTED THIS REVIEW UNDER THE PRETENSE THAT I WOULD BE GOING ON THIS JOURNEY ON MY OWN. BUT HUBRIS HAS A REAL FUNNY WAY OF KICKING YOU IN THE SHINS (SPOILERS). I TOLD @CARBOLICGALVANOLOGIST ABOUT THE FACT THAT I’D JUST SAT THERE IN A DARK THEATRE AND GNAWED BASICALLY THROUGH THE BOTTOM OF MY KERNELSPLOSION BUCKET FOR THREE HOURS, AND YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT HE DID? HE SAID TO ME, “KARKAT. WE HAVE TO DO THIS TOGETHER. WE HAVE TO DELIVER ODYSSEY TO THE PEOPLE.” SO. HERE WE ARE. A CO-WRITTEN REVIEW (WHICH IS MOSTLY ME AND NO, VANTAS, YOU CAN’T REMOVE THIS PART, FUCK YOU) BY THE ONLY TWO TROLLS IN PARADOX SPACE WHO KNOW WHAT THEY’RE TALKING ABOUT. DO YOU KNOW HOW FUCKING HARD IT IS TO REIN NOT ONE, BUT *TWO* OF US IN? THIS REVIEW IS THE *EPITOME* OF TWO DUMB BITCHES SAYING “EXACTLYYYYYYYYY”. THIS IS GOING TO BE AN INCREDIBLY LONG ANALYSIS FOR YOU PEA-BRAINED IMPS WITH NEXT-TO-ZERO READING COMPREHENSION AND CRITICAL THINKING SKILLS, BUT MAYBE YOU CAN TREAT THIS AS A SPONGE EXERCISE. AND FOR THE REST OF YOU WHO ARE EAGER TO MUNCH YOUR WAY DOWN TO THE BOTTOM OF *THIS* KERNELSPLOSION BUCKET AND GET YOUR MONEY’S WORTH OF THE THE BUTTERY, SOGGY MORSELS: SIT BACK. RELAX. MAYBE TAKE A MIGRAINE PILL PREEMPTIVELY. AND LET’S FUCKING GO. —- REVIEW BEGIN —- ZEUS’S LAW. THE CORNERSTONE OF ANCIENT HUMAN GREEK RELIGION AND PHILOSOPHY. THOUGH NOT A WRITTEN STATUTE, IT DEFINES THE SACRED OBLIGATIONS THAT COMPRISE A DIVINE MORAL ORDER, GOVERNING COMMUNITY, OATHS, KINGSHIP, JUSTICE, AND THE RESPECT OF THE STRANGER. POETRY AND FICTIVE WORKS BACK IN YE OLDE HUMAN DAYS DEPICT ZEUS AS THE OMNIPOTENT FORCE TOWARD PROTECTION OF THE VULNERABLE. AND IT COMES WITH A BIG RED FLASHING WARNING LABEL: ANYONE CAN BE A GOD, SO YOU BETTER FUCKING TREAT EVERYONE AS IF THEY WERE. THIS UNCERTAIN PROBABILITY SHAPED AN ENTIRE SOCIETY FOR AN EON TO COME, BASED ON THE CHOICE TO BELIEVE. RELATIONSHIPS FORGED FROM RITUALISED FRIENDSHIP WENT ON TO SHAPE ARISTOCRACY AND GOVERNMENT, INHERITED GUEST-FRIENDS THROUGHOUT GENERATIONS, AND BUILT THE FOUNDATIONS OF AN EVER-GROWING POLITICAL — AND FAMILIAL— NETWORK. BOOM. HISTORY LESSON. YEAH, WE’RE BOTH ADVANCED HUMAN HISTORY BUFFS. YOU KIND OF HAVE TO BE INTO THAT SORT OF THING TO KNOW YOUR MOVIES AS WELL AS WE DO, YOU FEEL ME? BUT, CLASSIC MOVE FROM US, HERE– AND I MEAN ALL OF PARADOX SPACE — WE SEEM TO HAVE FORGOTTEN ABOUT ALL OF THAT AS TIME GOES ON. INCREASINGLY, WE LIVE IN A WORLD THAT HAS TURNED ITSELF ASS-BACKWARDS. WE TREAT EACH OTHER AND OURSELVES WITH AN INDIFFERENCE UNRIVALLED TO ANYTHING SOCIETY HAS SEEN BEFORE. EVEN THE DAMN WORDS THAT SHAPE OUR STORYTELLING AND SOCIETY HAVE GONE INWARD TOO, FORGETTING THE TANGIBLE AND BECOMING INCREASINGLY ABSTRACT AND CLINICAL. LOGIC, TREATMENT, REGULATION, FAVOURED OVER STORY, COMPANIONSHIP, COURAGE. THE CONNOTATIONS CAN’T BE CLEARER. WE’RE LOSING EACH OTHER AND OURSELVES TO THE CHARYBDIS, SPINNING AND SPINNING TOWARD A WILD, THRASHING END. TRANSLATOR NOTE: THIS MEANS THAT WE ARE FUCKED. ALMOST, WITH A COUPLE OF HUGE FLASHING *ASTERISKS*. WHAT HAPPENS TO US IF WE DON’T SURVIVE CIRCLING THE DRAIN? SOMETHING HAS TO PULL US OUT OF IT, LEST WE FORGET THE WEB HUMANITY BUILT IS THERE TO SERVE A PURPOSE. WE ARGUE THAT THIS MODERN INTERPRETATION OF THE ODYSSEY SERVES AS A REACHING, LONG-LOST PART OF OURSELVES, CRYING OUT: SAVE YOURSELF. SAVE YOUR BROODMATE. SAVE US ALL. HERE’S HOW. BUT LET’S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS ABOUT THE FILM ITSELF, FIRST. HUMAN CHRISTOPHER NOLAN HAD SOMETHING HUGE TO CONQUER, MUCH LIKE ODYSSEUS HIMSELF. TRANSLATING AN ANCIENT TEXT, REGARDLESS OF ITS PUNY SIMPLETON HUMAN ORIGIN, IS A MASSIVE UNDERTAKING. IT REQUIRES A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF AWARENESS THAT OFTENTIMES IS LACKING IN LARGE-SCALE PRODUCTIONS, WHETHER THAT’S DUE TO THE CLEANSING OF NARRATIVE IN THE INTEREST OF PLACATING A WIDE AS POSSIBLE AUDIENCE, OR BEING SIMPLY TOO COWARDLY TO GET TO THE POINT. NORMALLY, I WOULD SAY, “YOU CAN ALL ACT LIKE BRAINDEAD ASSWIPES IN YOUR OWN FESTERING FLAP OF PARADOX SPACE, FINE WITH ME”, BUT NOT IN THIS INSTANCE. NUH UH. NOT ONLY THIS, BUT DUE TO THE SHEER VOLUME OF THE TEXT ITSELF (WITHOUT EVEN TOUCHING THE TALE OF THE ILIAD), THERE ARE WHAT SEEM LIKE ENDLESS POINTS OF INTEREST AND A PLETHORA OF LESSONS TO BE LEARNED. THEY LURK AROUND SHADOWY CORNERS, BARREL TOWARD US IN LUMBERING FOOTSTEPS, SING TO US WITH A SIREN’S SONG. SO MANY OPTIONS IN A NARRATIVE THAT SPEAKS AD NAUSEAM, THAT NOLAN WAS SURELY SPOILED FOR CHOICE LIKE A GRUB IN A GODDAMN CANDY STORE SETTING THEIR GANDERBULBS ON A FRESH CUP OF ANT POPPING BOBA. AND ANYHOW— WHAT IS THE RELEVANCE OF A TEXT LIKE THE ODYSSEY? WHY ARE WE EVEN TALKING ABOUT IT? THE ODYSSEY’S POWER LIES IN THE TRUTH OF IT BEING “THE OLDEST STORY”. IT CONTAINS THE ABILITY TO TRANSMUTE ITSELF TO FIT THE CURRENT SOCIAL NARRATIVE AND BE APPLICABLE TO OUR LIVES THROUGHOUT THE AGES. THAT’S THE BEAUTY OF A TEXT LIKE THIS; OVER THE COURSE OF 3,000 EARTH YEARS, IT STILL TRANSFORMS ITS OWN MEANING OVER TIME. IT IS NO SURPRISE OR SECRET THAT NOLAN DOES NOT STAY COMPLETELY FAITHFUL TO THE SOURCE TEXT. HOWEVER, I RAISE THE QUESTION, IF THE ODYSSEY WAS A MASSIVE PHILOSOPHICAL ALLEGORY FOR HIS TIME, WHY CAN’T WE USE IT AS ONE FOR NOW? THIS IS WHERE NOLAN TAKES THE REINS. HEAVY ARE THE GYVES OF A MONUMENTAL AND OVERWHELMING LITERARY MASTERPIECE, SHACKLING ONESELF IN ORDER TO CONVEY MEANING TO AN AUDIENCE THAT, FRANKLY, ARE A MISERABLE POINTLESS CROP OF LIFEFORMS FROM A MEANINGLESS BORING PUSTULE OF A PLANET. NOLAN DOES A FANTASTIC JOB, HOWEVER, OF RELAYING NARRATIVE INFORMATION THAT TRULY RESONATES, LEAVING ITS SOLID CORE. YOU CAN’T HELP BUT THINK ABOUT IT, EVEN LONG AFTER THE THREE HOUR LONG FILM ENDS. I KNOW I DID, AND SO DID VANTAS. WE COULDN’T FUCKING SHUT UP ABOUT IT. SO. THIS BRINGS US TO THE SEVERAL THEMES OF THIS FILM, AND WHY WE THINK IT’S IMPORTANT TO TALK ABOUT THEM. ODYSSEUS IS NOT NECESSARILY THIS BIG HERO WE’RE ALL COUNTING ON HIM TO BE. WE UNDERSTAND THE CONTEXT OF ODYSSEUS’ STORY AS A DESPERATE WARNING IF WE JUST TAKE TWO SECONDS TO REALLY LOOK AT IT. IF YOU VIEW ODYSSEUS AS THE PROTAGONIST, AT FACE VALUE, IT’S ABOUT BEING A LEADER. HE IS INDEED THE BRAVE WARRIOR WHO DEFEATED AN ARMY IN THE BATTLE OF TROY, THEN MADE THE PERILOUS JOURNEY BACK HOME TO HIS WIFE AND SON. ISN’T THAT ADMIRABLE? BUT YOU WOULD BE A FLAMING IDIOT IF YOU STOPPED YOUR THOUGHT TRAIN AT THIS STATION. THE FIRST SCENE WE WITNESS IS SINON TAKING HIS DYING BREATH, PINNED AGAINST THE TROJAN HORSE. A SACRIFICE, AND ONE THAT WE LATER FIND OUT IS BUILT ON A FARCE; SINON IS LED TO BELIEVE THAT HE ISN’T A SACRIFICE AT ALL, THAT THE IMPOSING STATUE IS HOLLOW. HE DIES WITHOUT UNDERSTANDING THAT HE IS NOTHING BUT A PAWN FOR ONE MAN’S CHOICE. IT IS THE ULTIMATE BETRAYAL OF ZEUS’S LAW, AND THUS THE BETRAYAL OF COMPASSION AND EMPATHY. ODYSSEUS BETRAYS THIS LAW TIME AND TIME AGAIN, HIS PRIDE SWELLING FAR TOO WIDE IN HIS CHEST TO MAKE ROOM FOR HIS PUSHER. HE REFUSES TO LISTEN TO HIS SLOWLY DWINDLING ARMY AS THEY CROSS TREACHEROUS SEAS AND ENCOUNTER DANGERS AT EVERY STOP. HE FIRES AN ARROW AT POLYPHEMUS JUST BECAUSE HE DESIRES TO SHOW HIS SUCCESS IN OVERCOMING HIM, FORCES HIMSELF TO LISTEN TO THE SIREN’S SONG JUST BECAUSE HE WANTS TO BE THE ONLY ONE TO HAVE HEARD IT AND SURVIVED. HE TURNS AWAY FROM HADES AND THE FACES OF HELL HE RECOGNISES WITH A REFUSAL TO ACKNOWLEDGE THE INEVITABILITY OF A FATE HE DOESN’T WANT. OH-DICK-SEUS. THAT’S WHAT HE IS. HA. HA HA, EVEN. LIKEWISE, THE ATROCITIES COMMITTED THEREOF ARE ALSO DEMONSTRATED IN THE SUITORS OF PENELOPE; THEY CONSUME AND TERRORISE THE PALACE, SLAUGHTER HIS LIVESTOCK, DRINK HIS WINE, INTIMIDATE TELEMACHUS, PRESSURE PENELOPE AND CONTEMPLATE MURDER. THEIR CRIME IS NOT SIMPLE DISCOURTESY. THEY CONVERT HOSPITALITY INTO PARASITISM. IT IS THIS BASTARDISATION OF TRUST, THE VIOLATION OF INSTITUTIONAL ALLIANCE, THAT BREAKS THIS ANCIENT SOCIETY— AND US, THOUSANDS OF YEARS IN THE FUTURE— APART. THE CATASTROPHE RESULTING IS CUMULATIVE RATHER THAN INSTANTANEOUS. THE SUITORS ARE REPEATEDLY WARNED BY BOTH PENELOPE AND TELEMACHUS. THERE ARE COUNTLESS OPPORTUNITIES TO TURN BACK, TO REPENT, TO CONCEDE, TO UNDERSTAND WHAT THE GODS HAVE PROPHESIED. THERE ARE MOMENTS, EVEN, OF PROSPERITY AMONGST WARRIORS; BUT UNRESOLVED VIOLATION ACCUMULATES UNTIL REVERSAL BECOMES UNAVOIDABLE. IN FACT, ATHENA CAN’T MAKE THINGS ANY CLEARER TO ODYSSEUS WHEN SHE SAYS, “WHO DOESN’T UNDERSTAND THUNDER? FIRE? A CHILD’S SMILE? A GOOD HARVEST?” IT DEMONSTRATES THAT GUIDANCE ONLY COMES FROM THE WILLINGNESS TO UNDERSTAND BY TRUE PERCEPTION, SOMETHING THAT ODYSSEUS IS REFUSING TO LOOK IN THE EYE. LEAVING ODYSSEUS AS THE LAST OF THE LAST ABOARD A SINKING SHIP IN THE MIDDLE OF ZEUS’S MIGHTY STORM IS ONLY THE TERMINAL EVENT. THE DEEPER PUNISHMENT IS HIS OWN REFUSAL TO ADMIT WHEN ENOUGH IS FUCKING ENOUGH. HUBRIS. ONE MAN’S CHOICE. THIS IS WHAT PULLS APART THE INTRICATE WEB THE ODYSSEY WEAVES. AND THE CONSEQUENCES ENDURE: CIVILISATION IS TESTED BY THE TREATMENT OF A STRANGER. ZEUS’S LAW REMAINS RELEVANT IF WE OBSERVE ITS APPLICATIONS IN TODAY’S SOCIOPOLITICAL UNREST. THE POLITICS OF REPRESENTATION IN A TIME LIKE THE ONE WE OCCUPY DO NOT GO UNNOTICED. NOLAN’S DECISIONS ON CASTING, THEMATIC LANGUAGE, VISUALISATION, AND STORYTELLING POSITION HIM IN A VERY DELIBERATE AND SPECIFIC PLACE AMONGST THE STORM OF MODERN CULTURE. WE’VE SEEN SO MANY PEOPLE COMPLAIN ABOUT THE GODDAMN BULLSHIT THAT IS “WOKEISM” IN CINEMA, AND THAT NOLAN IS ONLY PULLING THESE SORTS OF MOVES TO TICK HIS BOXES. THIS IS A FATAL MISSTEP, HOWEVER; AN OVERSIGHT TO AN INTENTIONAL PROVOCATION. AND REALLY– HOW OFTEN DOES THIS HAPPEN IN OUR LIVES TODAY TO THOSE OF US THAT ARE SCAPEGOATED FOR THEIR MERE EXISTENCE? FOR THEIR CHOICES, REGARDLESS OF THEIR MORAL STANDING? FOR EXAMPLE, SINON THOUGHT HE WAS DOING THE RIGHT THING. NO ONE ELSE DID. AND ODYSSEUS LET THEM BELIEVE THAT. PERHAPS HE EVEN BELIEVED IT HIMSELF. THE HOLINESS OF OUR BRETHREN, KNOWN OR UNKNOWN, HAS BEEN LOST TO MYTH. IT SEEMS WE HAVE FORGOTTEN THAT THE STRANGER IS SACRED. WHAT THIS FILM ACHIEVES IS A PULL TOWARD THIS ORIGINAL DOCTRINE, BUT ALSO A LAMENTATION ON WHAT WE HAVE ALREADY LOST. ZEUS'S LAW ISN'T JUST BETRAYED THROUGH ODYSSEUS, IT'S FLIPPED — SEE DIVINITY IN THE GRACE OF THE STRANGER, AND YOU WILL FIND THEIR MOST DIVINE QUALITIES. SEE AN ENEMY, AND YOU WILL FIND AN ENEMY. WE ARE TRAINED TO SEE THE WAY WE SEE. WE MUST RECOGNIZE THAT IT IS WITHIN OUR POWER TO TRAIN. IT IS A VISUALISATION OF A WORLD COMING TO TERMS WITH THE VIOLENCE IT HAS INFLICTED ON ITSELF, AND THE INTENTIONAL BLINDERS THAT WE STILL WEAR. NOLAN’S FILM IS A DEEP EXAMINATION OF THE POWER A NARRATIVE CAN HOLD, THE APPEAL OF A MEMORY, AND THE BELIEF IN AN UNRELIABLE NARRATOR. IT'S NOT A DESIRE FOR SOMETHING YOU DON'T HAVE, IT'S A LONGING FOR THAT WHICH YOU HAVE ALREADY LOST AND CANNOT BEAR TO BE WITHOUT. STORIES ARE HOW PEOPLE WAGE WARS, BUILD EMPIRES, AND CONVEY MEANING. THEY ARE WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION AS MUCH AS THEY ARE AN OLIVE BRANCH. THE ODYSSEY IS BOTH, AND THE TEXT’S UNRELIABILITY STEEPED IN A RICH, DEVELOPED SET OF PHILOSOPHICAL IDEOLOGY MAKES FOR A FINE RECIPE FOR MODERN DISCOURSE. NOLAN MAKES A CHOICE TO DELIBERATELY MOVE AWAY FROM THE ORIGINAL TEXTUAL CANON IN ORDER TO ASK THE BIGGER QUESTION FOLLOWING ITS EXISTENCE: WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF THIS STORY RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW? IN THIS, THE FILM IS PARTICULARLY POIGNANT, TAKING SERIOUSLY WHAT WE KNEW THEN AND STILL BEING EARNEST IN WHAT WE UNDERSTAND ABOUT LIFE TODAY. IT SERVES A SIMILAR PURPOSE TO OTHER TEXTS THAT STAND THE TEST OF TIME. THE RHETORICAL QUESTIONS THEY PRESENT THROUGH THE MEANS OF FICTION APPEAL TO A WIDE RANGE OF SOCIOPOLITICAL THOUGHT AND ALLOW PEOPLE TO PROJECT THEIR OWN IDEOLOGIES ONTO THOSE TOPICS, CHANGING THEIR MEANINGS INTO SOMETHING TANGIBLE FOR ANY MODERN AUDIENCE, NO MATTER IF YOU’RE A WINDSOCK HEADED SHITMOUTH OR A BLITHERING MOANY NOOKSUCKER, WHICH MOST OF YOU CERTAINLY ARE AT LEAST ONE OF THOSE THINGS. EVERYONE CAN FIND AN INTERPRETATION THAT SUITS THEIR PERSONAL NARRATIVE. IF YOU THINK IT AGREES WITH YOU, IT’S BECAUSE IT *DOES*, BUT NEVER ENTIRELY, NEVER WITH CONVICTION. MORE OFTEN, IT CHALLENGES. IT MAY FORCE YOU TO LOOK IN PLACES YOU WOULD RATHER NOT. IT MAY FORCE YOU TO EXAMINE THE WAYS IN WHICH WE HAVE FAILED OUR BROTHERS AND SISTERS, WHO STOPPED BEING GUEST-FRIENDS A LONG TIME AGO. IT MAY ASK YOU WHETHER YOU CAN COMPREHEND WHAT ALL OF PARADOX SPACE NEEDS, OR IF YOU ARE SIMPLY REFUSING TO BE PRESENT. AND IT WILL WARN YOU AS IT HAS WARNED ALL OF US TIME AND TIME AGAIN, THAT THE WAY THINGS ARE GOING CANNOT STAY THAT WAY. HEED THE ADVICE OF ATHENA: WHO DOESN’T UNDERSTAND THUNDER? FIRE?

letterboxd.comA ★★★★★ review of The Odyssey (2026)ZEUS’S LAW. THE CORNERSTONE OF ANCIENT HUMAN GREEK RELIGION AND PHILOSOPHY. THOUGH NOT A WRITTEN STATUTE, IT DEFINES THE SACRED OBLIGATIONS THAT COMPRISE A DIVINE MORAL ORDER, GOVERNING COMMUNITY, OATHS, KINGSHIP, JUSTICE, AND THE RESPECT OF THE STRANGER. POETRY AND FICTIVE WORKS BACK IN YE OLDE HUMAN DAYS DEPICT ZEUS AS THE OMNIPOTENT FORCE TOWARD PROTECTION OF THE VULNERABLE. AND IT COMES WITH A BIG RED FLASHING WARNING LABEL: ANYONE CAN BE A GOD, SO YOU BETTER FUCKING TREAT EVERYONE AS IF THEY WERE. THIS UNCERTAIN PROBABILITY SHAPED AN ENTIRE SOCIETY FOR AN EON TO COME, BASED ON THE CHOICEletterboxd.com

pixieivie.substack.comTell Me, O’ MuseThe Odyssey, and the Network of Humanitypixieivie.substack.com

Caspertame

1 month ago

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KARKAT VANTAS

1 month ago

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Adorabloodthirsty Cinemassacre Club-Goer

@creaticGoeticist[CG]

THE #FELTOPENING IS FUZZY. I WOKE UP WITH THIS AS NOT ONLY MY PALMHUSK LOCK SCREEN, BUT MY HUSKTOP, MY TELEVISION LOADING SCREEN, AND SOMEHOW ALSO TAPED TO THE MIRROR IN MY ABLUTIONBLOCK. THANK YOU @GALLOWSCALIBRATOR#0701, I’M SURE YOU DIDN’T ALSO SEND THIS TO FUCKING EVERYBODY YOU KNOW. FEATURING @CENTAURSTURMOIL TOO. DON’T WE ALL LOOK SO CUTE. I AM BEING PLEASANT AND AGREEABLE, AND I WILL GENTLY LOWER A MAGNIFICENT, CORUSCATING COLUMN OF HOT FUCK YOU DOWN THE PROTEIN CHUTE OF ANYONE WHO SAYS OTHERWISE. HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/059A9C647786.PNG

WHEEL OF TORTURE

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[DEATH BY BEHEADING] <[WE'RE LOOKING FOR CONTESTANTS! YOU! Yes, YOU! Want to get RICH quick? IMPRESS your quadrant? Make your custodian PROUD? Feel the THRILL and have an unforgettable time? Then you belong with US! We’re looking for the BRAVEST, most DARING, and most DETERMINED trolls ready to compete and tear each other’s THROATS out in a thrilling game of LIFE AND DEATH! The winner takes it all! Think you can SURPRISE us? Then stay tuned for when applications open! I’m your host RGABIE ADAMAN, and I welcome you to WHEEL OF TORTURE!]