♦ pitied by @quixoticCosmos
I signed off on some things, of course. And I was assured the fictionalized version of myself was very flattering. - MC Oleana
😭😭😭😭 🤔 i thought 💭 it was so obvi🖐️ 🤪but people are CRAY-Z🤪 🫵 🫵 🫵love your work emcee 🫵 🫵 🫵 ✊thanks for keeping it so fucking real✊ #Chairministrangling #SigmaGrindingMyFuckingTeethNow #LikeABoss #PityABoss #HateABoss #PityABoss #AND #THEY #DRAGGED #MY #LUSUS #INTO #THIS 🟢 CHARMS is ONLINE.
I almost feel bad for him. Almost. Also eXplains why I've been getting threatening spam emails from a mob boss claiming he has access to my Fiduspawn storage. - MC Oleana
"ceo" sure ok yeah buddy you guys are genuinely stupid if you listen to this guy ever again after tonight legal name: roewzi charms ip: 5888-XXX-XXXX decimal: 1501300818 hostname: 44.224.XX.XX.XXXX ASN: XXXXXX ISP: imperial empire fiber op co services: public proxy server dob: 20XX 11th bilunar perigee of the 7th dark season's equinox known aliases: CEO Charms, Charmer, CHARMS4HIRE, luckeecharms, luck E charms, The Gold Gilded Grifter, The Menace, The Handyman, "Sir" (self-proclaimed), Corporate Overlord Roewzi (you fucking wish), The Yellow Menace, Yellow Jacket, Anater Nahhme, Legull Lexper, Chairministrangler Roewze, Gieovi Rocket, Ehmheh Bhison, Grifth Ithuhe, Glitter Gloss caste: gold (#FFD700) hemospectrum position: barely above dirt age: 12 Sweeps (approximately 26 Earth years, though he'll claim "executive experience" dating back to the condescension's youth) ripcode: 59032-11 birthplace: lowblood communal brooding caverns, 'New Trolleans' - Garden of Eaten - Spirebluffs - specifically the region known locally as "Lower Out Ward District on 12th." lusus: cujojito barbisito barkbeastito (a trembling bug-eyed little oversized rat beast approximately the size of a thermal hullpack spare revitalizer and twice as loud. possesses four legs, excessive fur that molts constantly, and a respiratory condition causing perpetual high-frequency yapping that reads as psychological warfare. the lusus requires a specialized heating rock and becomes catatonic when temperatures drop below "mild nuclear reactor proximity." despite being a supposed "guardian beast," cujojito has a medical history twice as long as sweeps survived) crimes: fake business, fake business degree, no liquidity (unless you count broken radiator puddles), no bitches, pathological lying, running a diploma mill, unregistered businesses, counterfeiting caeger, larceny, drone tampering, loitering, panhandling, unlicensed legislaceration, forgery, fraud, embezzlement, all unproven thanks to hht bellyaches but most heinously this fucker is pretending to be @quixoticCosmos on here he lied and @dynamicFlowfields helped to covered it up. proof:
The Chairmancer and I were necking at Diminutive Manicured Lawn Hoops and Clubs. It was a tight competition, but ultimately I came out on top. @quiXoticCosmos #CompetitiveBusiness #MyBoss #DontFireMe https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/94c1a11738c0.jpg - MC Oleana
The time is approaching. The end is nigh. Join us tomorrow for #PuppetsOverParty, where we will be wishing this wretched thing a final #ByeMister. Mourners will also get the first look at an innovative new collaboration from #MacroCullsmos X Sephgorea. See you there. ( //art credit: @tumblingTenet ) #Sponsored #Advertisement https://i.imgur.com/4WNNzEz.png - MC Oleana
Thank you @legendaryLeague~! He had to save for an entire sweep to be able to afford the gemstone of my human engagement ring, on his meager competitive winnings~. Although it is not the cost of the treasure that matters, but the passion of the troll who grinded for it~. And no one is more passionate than him~. If you know what I mean~. O~U #NSFW #IMeanHisSlug #Grinding #Squiggling #TwirlingAround #MyChud https://cdn~.imgchest~.com/files/aa6e12120417~.png
I'm currently in talks about an upcoming collaboration, that I think many of you will be eXcited about. Macro Cullsmos X Sephgorea. Look forward to it. #MacroCullsmos #WatchThisSpace - MC Oleana
Ah~. I did not intend to chop Troll Jake Paul clean in half, length-wise~. But I'm afraid he forced my frond~. I quite liked his diamond-encrusted shorts, though~. Very tasteful~. #Violence #Sinfluencer #Gladiating #Gore
They're saying someone named Troll Jake Paul wants a fight with me~! Ha~! He must be an honorable man to brave a fight with the likes of Hektor Castio~! #Sinfluencer #Networking #Collaboration #EveryDayImGladiating
For those concerned about me trimming my squiggly, do not worry~. It grew back even more mighty than before~! Like a grand hydra~.~.~.~! ~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~. #Suggestive #HowManyHeads~? #Heh #LetsJustSay #TheresSome
Hark~! What is this~? Some bicep-shaped summons has floated down from the heavens~.~.~. Or perhaps just from a member of the crowd~? Oh, what a glorious occasion~! I shall bellow it from the highest peaks ~ #ImComing to #BoysNight~~~~~~! The festivities shall be legendary~! Let us feast and be merry~! Though we may enter as Boys, we shall leave~.~.~. as Men~! @caligulaAscendit https://cdn~.imgchest~.com/files/d9220a2c830e~.png
Salt is one of my favorite tastes~. Not only that, but it is a staple of almost any dish~. It makes me go a little cra~zy, to be honest~. I'm only satisfied when I feel those hard chunks tingle on my tongue~. When I sit back at the nutrition plank and see your look of equal contentment, belly full with the salty meal we shared between us, wiping your tunnel daintily with a napkin, and unable to speak and tell me what a good job I did, for fear that a single utterance may cause you to pop~.~.~. That's when I'm sa~tisfied~. #Food #Foodie #Foodspiration #Grilliator #Suggestive https://cdn~.imgchest~.com/files/c5ae020df7e6~.png
If there is glory on the other side of this hole, then I shall find it~~~~~~! #Suggestive
Trimming my squiggly for a woman, because that is just the kind of gentleman I am~. ~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~. ✀ ~.~.✀~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~. ~.~. #Suggestive #Chivalry
Ha~! The naysayers said it couldn't be done~! But I never stopped believing~! First, I cured my Troll Sisyphus with a prescription from the harmacy, and now I've conquered this hill with my raging boulder~! Witness me, Hektor Castio, and all of my glory~.~.~.~.~.~! https://cdn~.imgchest~.com/files/114e605c756e~.png
Alright~! No more fooling around~! If pushing isn't enough, I'm going to punch this boulder straight up this hill~! Give the people what they came to see~! HYAAAA~~~~! https://cdn~.imgchest~.com/files/52e85933c4dc~.gif
HAL is undergoing a system-wide update. Please stand by.
Back in the day, I once awoke to the sound of my party companion screaming "STOP WATCHING ME PEE~!" followed by a torrential roar of water~. Turns out, he had gotten up to do his business, and his stream, so to speak, splashed directly into the ganderbulb of a giant tentaclebeast blending in with the rocks~. So, of course, he had to hit it with the old Tidal Wave~. #MyLore
If you're looking for a unicorn, look no further~. I have 1~.5 horns and 2 fronds~. #Suggestive
The manglegement is telling me they want to see more beheading~. Fine with me~! If they want head, I'll give them head~! #Violence #Suggestive
I am currently being reprimanded by the Dreaded Manglegement for tossing aside my halberd in one too many battles~. But can one truly blame me~? How am I to forge a warrior's bond at polearm's length~? A wise troll once said "know one's enemy," and what better way than to be up close and personal, grappling onto whatever nub I can reach~? Am I not probing into his inner depths, with my body firmly pressed up against his, as we squirm around in the dirt~? His walk stems wrapped around me, heels grinding into my torso, and teeth sunk into my wind chute as we tumble over and over, before I inevitably come out on top~? I want nothing more than to deliver a fight so passionate that even the audience can feel my tingling excitement~! Though, I admit, being thoroughly degraded by manglegement is a tad exciting as well~. #MyMangleger #EveryDayImGladiating #Violence #NSFW
I would never obliterate a twink~.~.~.~.~! Unless it was by royal decree of Her Imperious Condescension herself~! Or by decree of the Dreaded Manglegement~! A little battering, pounding, tossing about, and light maiming are fair play though~. #Violence #NSFW #NSFWE #Twinkscourse #TwinkHusbandry
Like ecstasy in your tunnel~.
Looks like they have me working the meal block again~. No matter~. My performance will be legen~dary, regardless~. And I'll start by beating this dripping slab of meat until it's tender and quivering~. I could go all night~. If only I had someone to watch~. What's that~? You already are~? How naughty of you~. I might have to tenderize you next~. That's right~. I expect to see your hindquarters on this meal plank, pron~to~. #Tender #Slick #Jiggling #ReadyToGo #Food #Foodie #Foodspiration #Grilliator #NSFW #DontTellManglegement https://cdn~.imgchest~.com/files/07a25124cad0~.webp
࣪⊹₊˚{ NO }˚₊⊹ ࣪
࣪⊹₊˚{ NO NO NO NO }˚₊⊹ ࣪
The roar of an adoring crowd always gets my pusher racing~! And there is no better audience in Paradox Space than [Your Current Location]~! Am I right~~~~~~~? #Crowdwork #ApplauseBaiting
I admit I am more adept with tests of strength than of multiple choice~! Can someone tell me if this is a good score~? #LightDarkTriad #LightDarkTriadQuiz https://cdn~.imgchest~.com/files/a6d1cb4d8ffb~.png
I hope the spectators will enjoy this succulent growlbeast as much as I enjoyed slaying it for their entertainment~. Be sure to send your compliments to the chef~! #Foodie #Foodspiration #EveryDayImGladiating
We were supposed to collab. \><,/ #FeelLikePureChitt #JustWantHerBack
I don't know who these glorious hoofbeasts are, but I expected to get one with a horn like my dear old unifather~! Color me surprised~! #MyLittlePonyTest https://cdn~.imgchest~.com/files/02fb2c78e9db~.png
My dear, sweet unicornfather, who raised me~. For the most part~. He always knew what was best, and what would make me grow strong~. On this glorious occasion that they call #LususDay, he has choosen to celebrate by reinacting my most defining wigglerhood memory, those long many sweeps ago, of when he went out to get cigarettes and didn't return until many sweeps later~. He and I share in the same spirit of wanderlust, yearning to be free, galloping across foreign lands, wind in our mane~. And his absence only makes my pusher grow fonder~. For his absence is what molded me into the troll I am today~. Few will understand our relationship, and the iron forged bond we share~. I love you, unicornfather~! There, I said it~!
THE M⧃UNTAIN RETURNS T⧃ DANCE G⧃⧃D GRAVY HE IS DEEP IN THAT D⧃UGH
I'll say~.
_________________________ |<><><> | | <><><>| |<> | | <>| | | | | | (______ <\-/> ______) | | /_.-=-.\| " |/.-=-._\ | | /_ \(o_o)/ _\ | | /_ /\/ ^ \/\ _\ | | \/ | / \ | \/ | |_______ /((( )))\ _______| | __\ \___/ /__ | |--- (((---' '---))) ---| | | | | | | | | : | | : \<> | | <>/ \<> | | <>/ \<> | | <>/ `\<> | | <>/' `\<> | | <>/' `\<>| |<>/' `-. .-` '--' Bitches don't know about patchs' trusty thirst trap. #nsfw
Just me in the meal block tonight, kneading this decadent lump of dough~. Who said there is only pleasure in the finished product~? It's all about savoring the process~. And I do not mind a little yeast, oh no~. On the contrary, that is what gives bread its heavenly texture and taste~. Supple and spongy~. Sweet and tart~. Just how I like my women, might I add~. Give me that bun, and make it fizzy~. #Foodie #Foodspiration #Gladibaker #OhYes #ItsRising #Suggestive https://cdn~.imgchest~.com/files/5ce4d54b5ec5~.png
You know what they say~ giving up is easy~. Hope is hard~. And brother, I like to stay hard~.
There is no locked door that can keep me out~! I never had a talent for lock-picking, though~. I am able to bust them down with sheer strength alone~. Not to brag, but I once took out two solid stone doors in one single charge~. #MyLore
Woke up an hour before my alarm went off this morning, because even my sleep cycles are optimized for maXimum productivity. Few have schoolfed their bodies with the kind of work ethic I have. Also, my downstairs neighbor's barkbeast was howling like it was being boiled alive, but that's besides the point. #Motivation #Productivity #Girlboss - MC Oleana
indeed, chairman, i dare say the wvwavwes wvwe wvwere making in that poor lake wvwould havwe scared all the fish awvway wvwere it not for the beautiful bait wvwe had found betwvween us. i still remember the wvway it felt to look you in the eyes like a man and put my squiggly wvworm in your hand. fish on!
You're an #Inspiration, sir. - MC Oleana
You huaa - MC Oleana
Chairmancer please tell me you culled that thing. It looks malnourished. - MC Oleana
Don't talk to me until I've had my bloodsport~! Am I right~?
If you think this is bad, you should see the other troll~.
If any highblood women need help carrying their casualties, give me a call~~~! #Feminist
I love the el~gibbity co~mmunity~~~! (That's what the humans call it, right~?) #PrideMonth #HappyPride #Ally #MrParadoxSpacewide
I mean yes, sir. - MC Oleana
A fan~? Of mine~? You flatter me beyond belief, Chairmancer~! Let me know if you ever want tickets to a show~. I'll give you the VIT treatment~. Roll out the violet carpet and everything~. #FanEngagement #Networking #VeryImportantTroll
Greetings, lovely netizens~! This is my first post here~! I look forward to meeting you all, and swapping tales of epic feats and heroism~. And perhaps, weaving a few stories of our own~.
As a matter of principle, I refuse to either punch down, or up. Which is why I simply must continue to fire shots at other olive bloods for being worthless and #Cringe. - MC Oleana
Happy #MacroMonday. Anyone have colossal plans for the coming week? Growing a business, perhaps? EXpanding your horizons? #MacroCullsmos #Business #Motivational - MC Oleana
Branding all the interns with the #MacroCullsmos company logo as a show of their unwavering dedication. #Business #Girlboss #EmployeeHusbandry - MC Oleana
The Chairmancer is an eXceedingly skilled fiduspawn trainer. And his team, very formidable. A challenging battle, indeed. As you would eXpect from a steel-type specialist, his sturdy fiduspawn impose a wall that is not easily broken through. I had no choice but to go all-out, in our friendly sparing match. ...Sorry about Salazzle. #Fiduspawn #MyBoss #BossBabe #PleaseDontBeMad - MC Oleana
Making all the interns compete in a series of brutal, life-or-culling challenges of my own design. Similar thematically to the trials wigglers undergo. I'm calling it the Inkbeast Games. #Girlboss #MissBeast - MC Oleana
@quiXoticCosmos Chairmancer. Can we have a word. In my office block. - MC Oleana
#Substance #Relapsed https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/0636c5651a67.png - MC Oleana
WHY IS THE SCREEN XF MY HUSKTXP FRXZEN. WAIT. WHAT ARE THXSE JUTTING AND IMPUDENT SHAPES XN MY HUSKTXP BACKGRXUND? - MC Oleana
Don't worry about it.
You all have certainly seen the multiversal expansion of HAL currently going on. While you're scrambling to scrape together the bandwidth to run such a useful program, be sure to rattle your coffers for the website behind it as well. Find the plan that fits your freak at PlushRump.com.
#MacroCullsmos #CanItRunHAL #CanItRunYAOI https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/6ceb5459d2b7.gif - MC Oleana
#MacroCullsmos #CanItRunHAL #Easily. Pomon, I am in you.
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/eeab155ca3a9.png - MC Oleana
#MacroCullsmos #CanItRunHAL #LookingIntoIt.
Chairmancer. Please call me. - MC Oleana
Of course not, sir. It's never a bad idea to update your resume, regardless of job security. - MC Oleana
Spent the first half of the day updating my Razorme. What productive things have you all done so far, this Sunday? #Business #Motivation #Girlboss #WomenInSTEM - MC Oleana
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/b693069987bf.png - MC Oleana
This is generous beyond reason. Truly. Your employees are not worthy of your grace. I will assure that every worker's remaining 1/4 of the day is spent praising your name. - MC Oleana
#vwiolettime #sharingbeers #orasicallthem #fermentedhumanwvwheatbevwerages
Hhhokay. I'd be happy to facilitate, if you and the Chairmancer would like to pai- sailing together. I'll put it on the schedule. - MC Oleana
}(]]]]]) < awww hey kid look i'm sorry about your fuckinǦ ₽rized fidus₽awn i beat the shit out of and kicked down and down until you couldn't take it anymore > ([[[[[){ }(]]]]]) < he Ǧets five biǦ booms from me and team skull okay > ([[[[[){ }(]]]]]) < BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM > ([[[[[){ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/799db671aa05.j₽eǦ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/9c01929cb19b.web₽
#MacroCullsmos #BrandLoyalty #Professionalism #MyBoss https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/c2312ea7389c.png - MC Oleana
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/3c892dab67ee.png - MC Oleana
We at #MacroCullsmos would like to wish a merry Pride Month to humans, and others who celebrate(?) May your festivities be homoseXual, your traditional offerings of gay bacon be epic, and your group infighting be contentious and bloody. #PrideMonth #Pride #Wrath #Violence #CulturalAppreciation - MC Oleana
Scream-building eXercises today. The Chairmancer is in the tower, so I better hear those chitinous windholes ripped raw. #MacroCullsmos #Business #Violence #WorkIncentives - MC Oleana
wISH YOU COULD'VE SEEN ME L1KE THIS, pOPS,,,,,,,, HTTPS://MSPABOORU.COM//IMAGES/15/A5ECBD384749D30F2A66C6A73EE6D6ED.PNG ((neungson @ Tumblr))
⊹₊˚{ WRONG!!!!!!!! \}*o*{/ }˚₊⊹ ࣪ ࣪⊹₊˚{ WOWWWW, whered you find that shoddy opinion???? under your gas bladder? FIGURES!!!! #whateverschooner }˚₊⊹ ࣪
i like t)(e sound of t)(at. and maybe, per)(aps sometime... ill )(umor fiduspawn.
⊹₊˚{ YEAH. I KNOW. A HEM HEM HEM HEM. YOUREEEE WELCOME }-ᗜ-{ }-ᗜ-{ }˚₊⊹ ࣪ ࣪⊹₊˚{ ill even let you have that one four FREE because you oooobviously need the help }≖7≖{ }˚₊⊹ ࣪
Thank you for complimenting me and my caste, sir. I try to represent the best possible face of olives. Long gone are the days of us being seen as childish escapists with no meal plank manners. - MC Oleana
There is not and never will be an #EvilOleana. I am the one and only Macro Cullsmos's Oleana. An #EvilOleana would be inferior in every way. A meek, posture pole-less simp. Neither a #Girlboss, nor a #WomanInSTEM. She would have no hustle nor worth ethic, and would only be a drain on society. She would be a useless employee, undedicated and undeserving of her boss that she doesn't even respect. - MC Oleana