Lamplady Swansong
@arachnesGossamer
Night shift nurse, always ready and willing to heal your 8ches and pains! ::::)
eri x reader request y/n feeds eri gruel an then some #dubcon #beforanstylecullin #gruel #suggestivve #fincel #fincelplay #erixreader eri wwakes up from a roofie induced slumber to find himself shackled to a chair his immediate urge to panic momentarily subdued by the rush of a good lights sleep he allowws himself to relish in the sleepy aftergloww before his fight or flight senses creep in he goes from calm to agitated at the swwitch of a button thrashin about in his adult molt high chair like a fish out a wwater wwhich frankly isnt evven an analogy in the case a your favvorite semi aquatic chud its cruel reality settin in wwhy are you doin this to him huh "bud you gotta relax" you say enterin the pantry wwith feather light steps eris peristaltic movvements come to an abrupt halt as he wwhips his nub around to glare at you wwith irresistible prey eyes "this is for your owwn good i knoww you think you dont need this but trust me im doin you a favvor" you straddle the opposite chair an revveal a bowwl thats apparently been hidin under a tarpaulin on the dinin table the entire coddamn time eri cranes his neck to check out the bowwl wwhich brims wwith cement colored gruel gurglin as it pops an bubbles vviolently "thats gnarly i aint eatin that" eri says but his misgivvins fall on deaf hear holes because youre convvinced you knoww better an maybe youre right maybe you do knoww better you grab him by the butt chin an force his jaww open shovvin a heap a sputterin gruel into his chute "spitters are quitters" you coo plantin a hand ovver his chops so he cant hurl a loogey atcha he protests rockin back an forth but youvve got him strapped you let him tire himself out an once you see the bobbin a his hormone gland you let go sittin there all smug n shit "good boy" you pat the side a his sunken cheek here comes the second airplane theres been a change in him he swwallowws wwithout a struggle this time youvve managed to unearth some kind a subterranean gap moe he wwatches you pathetically browws furrowwed goop an spittle slimin his chin his bulbs shiny an wwet a string a snot dribbles dowwn his thin tremblin lips you feel somethin sickly stir inside you a twwisted desire to nurture at the sight a his flat belly an juttin ribs did i mention eri is shirtless cause yeah thats also a thin that definitely happened "wwell get you into shape dontcha wworry a real man knowws howw to eat chicks dont like guys wwho are all skin an bone"
#TEAMROCKET APPEAL REQUEST. I AM OPEN TO PUTTING ERIDAN IN HIS RIGHTFUL ROLE OF BITCHED GRUEL RECIPIENT. AND WORKING TOGETHER. TO FUNNEL FEED HIM LIKE A FOIE GRAS GOOSE. OR WHATEVER OTHER TORTUROUS SAWTRAP VERSION OF BEFORAN CULLING. HIS GENIUS THINKSPONGE CAN CONJURE. BUT YOU WILL HAVE TO CHANGE YOUR RECIPE. IF HIS GLOBES GET ANY BIGGER. THEY WILL OUTGROW MINE. AND I’LL HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO MURDERSUICIDE US.
⚣h w⚣w
i basically already do this rustie. havwe you seen vwhat they put in those nuggies? its all just cluckfovwl slush cooked into vwhat can barely qualify as solid food. if you wvanna masticate for him and feed him like a baby bird, thosere your shackles to vwear #cvw-sufferer-allusion. best i i can do for you is wvorkshop his ramblings into something more usable.
im not actin out this request just cancel the wwhole thin an throww it awway i fucked up big time also dont you dare speak ill a the nuggies cro
YOU CAN’T BACK OUT NOW. I JUST SPENT ALL NIGHT. DISTRACTED BY MY DUTIES. THINKING OF THE SAD FUCKUP. RUINOUS ENOUGH TO DEMAND THE EFFORTS OF TWO CULLERS. DID YOU KNOW. THERE’S A BEFORAN MANGA ABOUT THAT.
DISTRACTED FROM*. YOU SEE THE WRETCHED STATE I FIND MYSELF IN.
theres nothin you can say thatll convvince me to alloww one a you coddlin cretins to hold me dowwn wwhile the other stuffs my chute full a gruel wwhat if i accidentally get a squiggly
THAT'S FOR YOUR CULLER TO WORRY ABOUT.
HHHH. I HAVE SUCH SIGHTS TO SHOW YOU.
RED ALERT. THE BITCHES HAVE BREACHED #BOYSNIGHT. #SUBSTANCE. @arachnesGossamer @cuttlefishCabbalist @cthonicAspirations @caligulasAquarium @twinArmaggetfucked @centaursTurmoil @emptyEyes @veritysGleam
B0ys night is turning 0ut a l0t m0re fun than i th0ught it w0uld be
D --> I w001d like to apologize again for breaking that glass...
CLEARLY. YOU CAN'T BE TRUSTED WITH NICE THINGS. MAYBE NEXT TIME THE HOST WILL SERVE YOU FROM A RUSTY PAIL. OR OFF THE FLOOR.
D --> Ngh... Do not imply such preposterous things D --> E%cuse me
࣪⊹₊˚{ YAYYYY! \}*7*{/ thats LITERALLYYYYY ME in the cornerrrr! }˚₊⊹ ࣪
Very amusing to #vaguepost soooooooo poorly. ##) #lightempath
Good heavens, I have not seen such a dire case in many a sweep. I suppose I shall keep a firm hand upon this particular thread to try and reveal who has neglected their cullee so gr8ly. #vagueposting #lightempath #tw:8eforanculling
It has 8een a few sweeps since I have seen at all, that is true! 8ut I still fondly regard the memory of my dear companions faces, particularly the visage of the finest troll around, Coolscar. You 8ear a passing resem8lance, if what I am gleaning from your profile picture is the truth!!!!!!!! I may not know (yet) all the ins and outs of these "dancestral ties" that have 8een spoken a8out on-site, 8ut I cannot argue that there are many that share castenames and even occasionally the 8ehavioral quirks (and typing quirks) of their supposed namesake! Such a strange and marvelous thing to stum8le hornfirst into. ::::)
You are not at fault for the shortcomings of the troll who ought to 8e looking after you, and ensuring you do not post such lascivious entries a8out your legs or other trolls racks. Fret not, this good Lamplady is on the case to return you to the care of your esta8lished handler.
WHERE IS THE OFFENDING POST. SO I CAN BE SURE TO AVOID IT.
Remember to take your meds, and to check when you're due for a refill too.
Happy to help!
Some patients can't 8e saved, 8ut that 8urden's not on you........ #auto8iographical #lightempath theantlers #lyricposting #rel8tionships
not a doctor. but. the burden is literally on you if your failure rate is a certain threshold. yeah. sure. some patients have bones-explode disease or whatever. but. given your eyes are bandaged. i don't think you should be doing surgery.
I do take those 8urdens quite seriously, though it is a 8it crass to refer to my patients as 8urdonsome, I fear. To 8e more clear, I am in the mediculling field, yes, 8ut I do not oper8 as a doctor. I am a nurse, often active during the night shift, which is far more 8usy and often has many of the more life-threatening situ8tions, particularly regarding injuries that are endured 8y those castes that oper8 as helpsmen. This chit is actually a8out a period of time early in my career when........ a decision that ought not have 8een followed through on was made, I suppose. A stirring of immense pity that occurred due to a diagnosis so dire given to one of my cullees that I fear it 8linded me to more pressing 8ehavioral defects, despite my having full control of my vision at this point in my life. It is a tiresome and very painful story to recount, so I will not 8ore you with the details, 8ut it does motiv8 me to do the utmost for all those in my care, regardless of their level of independence and capa8ility.
- It is shocking how mmany of this era's pupa fail to recognize the historical roots of this record. - Even I know themm. And I haven't listened to a single song since I was six.
I do not hold it against any of them, to 8e clear, my dear! It is simply the case of these things, some history slips through the cracks and into the dark. It is a 8ittersweet thing, to know that there are some who still themselves know.
I apologize for my unseemly post last light. It has 8een an unusually stressful time, and the 8eds seem to 8e emptying as swiftly as they fill. Some manner of contamin8tion in the food chain. We can only hope that the rest of us are lucky enough not to succum8 to this food 8orne illness, 8ut already I have seen the telling sweat and malaise in two other nurses.
wwould you like to soothe your nervves by holding a bundle of small and cute juvvenile lusii that alwways seemed to help you before or perhaps spending a night in my hivve
I think if anything it is time for me to consider a small 8reak from this dreary place after we ascertain where the infection has started from! I would 8e well served 8y your gentle voice sharing with me the finest informative and exhilar8ting facts a8out the lusii under your tender care........ perhaps I shall track down which a8lution trap my supervisor is currently hovering over and alert her to my plans once this sickness has 8een purged from our popul8tion of cullees.
i wwould like nothing more consider me your on stop shop for the most comforting and informativve lusii facts you can consider my vvoice akin to a documentary on the beauty of nature i do hate to see my dear swwansong upset
I have decided to take it into my hands to see what the devil has occurred here. I noticed that right 8efore the illness 8egan sweeping through the hospital, we took an massive order of milk????????
Milk???????? We have dozens of cullees that cannot digest it. What incompet8nt FOOL did this????????
oh no that is awwful perhaps it is some kind of milk conspiracy those poor cullees and their poor digestivve sacs
wwait it wwasnt wwho i think it wwas wwas it our mutual friend
You can't save them all. You can't save them all. You can't save them all. You can't save them all. You can't save them all. You can't save them all. You can't save them all. You can't save them all.
I saw lyrics from that al8um cross the dash.
....vague as fuck....
※ DID YOU KNOW: That a cull-Work programm could be right for a troll in your Life? I, for one, amm Living proof that it Works. - Interested in learning mmore? <> c3<
Ɏ honestly the only difference i see between bein culled aand bein employed is you get paaid for one Ɏ
- Me, indeed. ;-) ※ NOTICE: I cancelled your four o' clock, by the way. I just found out there was a hoofbeast race starting at five.
- Sir. Won't you be comming with mme? - Whatever happened to prioritizing a healthy Work-Life balance?
- Exactly. - You see, sir. This sort of quick-draw prioritization is why you're the boss. ;-)
Fell in another hole.
Thats Not Ideal
D —> I am highly concerned for your safety
No, not it is not. Unfortunately I do fear it may 8e my lot for the continuation of this perigee, unless the trend for #Megidomay changes soon.
sub0ptimal
I Wish You Well Or At Very Least A Smaller Number Of Holes Around Your General Vicinity To Fall In
Goodness, Lamplady, you must be more careful! )(ow are you ever going to take care of your patients if you're too busy being stuck in )(oles!!! 38(
I AM FINALLY FREE FROM THIS INFERNAL HOLE!!!!!!!!
I was just 8eginning to em8ark upon my hive visits for those few cullees i have who are capa8le of staying within their own hives for treatment, and due to my lack of vision, mis-stepped and tum8led horn over foot into quite the expansive fissure! It was quite the trial to escape, 8ut I have finally managed it! I truly hope that my patients do not 8egrudge me my l8tness.
D —> Are you in need of assistance
Oh In That Case I Am Glad You Survive The Tumble Though Of Course It Wasnt Your Time Yet Anyway
I would not say no to a helpful hand offered in this time of need, 8ut I fear I may not 8e a8le to adequ8tely descri8e my surroundings! In any case, I must catch my 8reath first. That hole was shockingly deep!
D —> Very well just know I w001d dutifully search for you if it becomes necessary D —> Do be careful it is likely there are more cavernous holes in your path
Why do I keep falling into holes on my hive visits this evening????????
Oh, dear.
Digging
oh no lamplady wwe must put a stop to these errant holes ruining your night did you scuff your knees
I fear my knees and my pride have 8oth 8een scuffed, 8ut I shall endure and attend to my w8ting colleges! A mere scuffed knee is not enought to cause the mediculling ministr8tions of this Lamplady to cease!!!!!!!!
that is the spirit lamplady may all the other medicullers take notes and attest to the chagrin of your chutzpah in attending to those wwho need your help scuff marks be damned
I fear there are 8ut a few suita8le prongholds in this damna8le crevasse........
are you stuck on your hole dear lamplady this cannot do is there perhaps a thick root or vvine you can firmly grasp
wwould you be opposed to the sending of a sturdy and dependable badgerlusus i am friends wwith to dig you out
Why would you comment on something if it means nothing to you? What a waste of effort!!!!!!!!
∙☾__☽ being a haterr is ̶f̶un
⛧why would you post something to a public forum if you didnt want people to comment on it? are you fucking stupid?⛧
Some people on the we8 seem to thrive off of 8eing vapid and just want attention without putting in any of the effort to 8e worth having eyes on.
Ah. I see the confusion. Due to my opaque nature as a conversationallist, this probllem has occurred in many diallogues before, so I will take a brief moment to ellucidate you as to the motivation and meaning behind my interaction. In my many, many sweeps, I have been tolld that I am something of a droll, or unplleasant person to speak to. An empress hersellf has tolld me I take mysellf too seriouslly. My troops in the war thought the concept of me smilling was an urban llegend. Though this is of course not true, the rarity of llevity in how one carries themsellf has perpetuated this atmosphere of unapproachabillity for much of my time. I am not particullarlly upset by this, and in fact for much of my llife it was favorablle. However, in recent sweeps the nights grow llong and my desire for sociall interfacing continues to scrape away at the walls of my psyche. So at the encouragement of those belloved to me, I have made the decision to go on something of a personall journey. There are trialls and tribullations, and I do not allways succeed on mounting every hill on the road to a heallthier mind. But such is the nature of all sellf-improvement endeavors woulld you not agree? So, I dust mysellf off, stand back upon my own two feet, and pull mysellf up by the proverbiall bootstraps. And in this effort, I have chosen to try and inject llevity and humor where once I woulld never have attempted thus. This, I have done to you, not out of mallice, but simplly out of boredom. So to answer your question, the true and ulltimate concllusion to your query, is that it was a Joke, or perhaps, to some, a Jape. Ha Ha.
Oh gracious, she's actually reviewing that drivel. Though I respect her artistry and know that there is surely merit to 8e found in this fiction, I cannot help 8ut feel like it has all somehow 8een at my expense. Such is my lot, I suppose!!!!!!!! XXXXP
I had assumed the work was biographicall. You tell me it is not true?
The author and I have never once crossed paths, and I do dou8t that she would have access to any records of my life thus far, so........ it really is just a lurid work of the imagin8tion! I imagine your first instinct would 8e to utter something like "Thank goodness," 8ut I ask you if such an exclaim8tion truly fits, considering the likelihood of more reput8tionally damaging filth coming forth? Perhaps you are like so many others, and simply see it as a curiosity to indulge in the examin8tion of, 8ut I pray you consider the damage that it has already done to me, let alone my reput8tion amongst other professionals. I cannot 8elieve I've had to more ardently defend my capa8ility as a medical attend8nt due to THIS rather than any of the myriad freak accidents that my patients and I have endured over the past few sweeps!!!!!!!!
Your reputation is irrellevant to me. Good lluck with that.
Just when you thought that the timeline could not sink to new lows, something of *that* nature crosses the feed. 8ut it is alright. Fret not, my dears, for this sordid little num8er will not 8e ruining my shift this fine evening! I shall not 8e swayed 8y a mere piece of fiction written 8y a troll who has never seen a proper cullward. My dignity remains intact, despite this attempt upon it. As any good nursemaid would tell you, patient incontinence is the least of our worries when working with those who are sla8ridden. Often times, it is of much more concern to ensure that the troll in question does not develop sla8sores, or worse, develop an infection of their 8reathsacks due to inactivity, as can happen in cases such as was descri8ed on this truly sleazy post. Hair and horn care are often left to the wayside in lesser 8eforan wards than that which I oper8 within, and I can assure you that all patients have their toileting needs taken care of with all grace and dignity held at the forefront of everyone's minds. What I find to 8e most uncomforta8le here is the dual fetishiz8tion of the profession of nurse as well as the nature of a sla88ound cullee as a means to explore erotic power dynamics. In truth, there is quite a 8it of harassment that we medicullers experience at the hands of our patients! This is often overlooked due to the discrepancy of our 8lood colors, 8ut many cullees see cool 8looded professionals as a means to deflect the Imperial Mand8 of Culling from their situ8tion, a sort of seeking of special privilege 8eyond what others might experience or expect. As someone who has experienced this sort of harassment 8efore, I decry this piece of fiction as little more than smutty imaginings of a non-8eforan troll trying to capitalize on the weakness of a gr8 author in her st8 of illness. For shame!!!!!!!! #lighttriadempathy #8eforusculling #fetishization #tw:powerdynamics
See there you go, sounding like so many others! You just had to ruin it 8y 8eing so li8idinous rather than 8uilding up to something truly and masterfully smeared across all sorts of guazey quadrant 8oundaries. I suppose I should not 8e surprised, however, as this is a common affliction for trolls of a ruddier hue and shorter lifespan, to take the enjoya8le things in life, and too quickly guide them to their climactic conclusions. There is joy to 8e found in the ride as well, you see!!!!!!!! :::;)
dont call them ruddy bro... also thats three ;)
Oh. You really are going to respond to this 8 times, aren't you?
1. "GOOD." WRONG! #EVIL. 2. "TSUNDERE PALE DESIRES INSIDE YOU." WRONG AGAIN! I DESIRE ONLY #BLOOD. 3. "SHORTER LIFESPAN." WRONG SOME MORE! I'M UNDER CONTRACT TO LIVE FOREVER. WE NEED A SECOND NURSE ON THE CASE. TO GET YOUR HEAD CHECKED. AS CLEARLY. YOUR POWERS ARE NOT WORKING PROPERLY. AND YOU COULD BENEFIT. FROM SOME MEDICULLING OF YOUR OWN. #NURSEXNURSE #YURIS #RANKBAIT #NSFW.
you miss ewvery shot you dont take, right?
CRONUS. YOU ARE FUCKING WITH MY GAME HERE. SO BAD.
honestly? good
:::/ Are we done here? Am I free to leave yet? I feel like I am indulging in an unsightly display of 8oth my powers as an empath and a display of wigglerish dynamics I ought to 8e well past.
you keep replying, thats fiwve ;) you must be real interested
Oh gracious, an entire night dedic8ted to fighting? I hope there is an accredited medical professional in attend8nce. It would 8e a sh8me if anyone were left permanently harmed.
☆ yeah florid’s got it probably☆
I just misclicked and hit a h8 react on one of my dear Zoologer's posts........ @affa8leCantor please don't take it personally! Another display of my horrid luck!
my dear lady of the lamps all i havve to say to that is wwhinnie wwhinnie wwhinnie bububuubub glub neigh glub neigh wwhich is of course aquatic skyhorse for it is wwater under the bridge or ovver the dam or wwherevver you like it but some flimsy bad lucky wwill nevver shake my belief in our deep running trench of friendship
Sometimes I wonder if these suffering warm8loods don't just expire in my care as a means of expressing spite. It is quite the uncharita8le thought, and one that I find myself repressing with some anger and fury. 8ut I must remem8er that all trolls have a 8uilt-in expir8tion date, one that is not for me to know. I may not 8e a8le to keep everyone as hale and hearty as they deserve, 8ut the soothing cerulean hues of my lamp at their 8edside at the very least gives them a gentle guide into the afterlife of their 8elief. That isn't to say that I view myself as a psychopomp 8y any means; 8eing such a figure would run antith8tical to what I am attempting as a healer. Instead, it is a 8urden I take on with all the care and reverence that it is due. #8lue8lood8urden #lighttriadempath
i bet those ones that burned to death definitelly did it to spite you yeah
hTtPs://mEdIa.tEnOr.cOm/7DeIaOdJjBgAaAa1/EvErYtHiNg-oKaY-DrAcUlA.WeBp
Your concern 8rings a smile to my face; all is well, I am simply reaffirming my duty in the face of gr8 hardship.
hTtPs://mEdIa.tEnOr.cOm/n8dVdOpNwCkAaAa1/YoU-WoUlD-NoT-BeLiEvE-Me-wReN-WeIcHmAn.wEbP hTtPs://mEdIa.tEnOr.cOm/iGpRr90O-LuAaAa1/WeRe-nOt-sO-DiFfErEnT-YoU-AnD-I.WeBp
LOOKS LIKE IN ANY CONCEIVABLE UNIVERSE, EVERY ANCESTRAL SERKET FIGURE IS A PHILOSOPHER-WARRIOR-PRINCESS. YOU HAVE TO BE A STUNTWOMAN OF SOME SERIOUS SPONGE-BENDING PROWESS TO GENERATE A PHILOSOPHY OF *THAT* LEVEL OF ELEGANCE TO EXCUSE HOW MUCH YOU FUCKING SUCK AT YOUR JOB.
such beautiful wwords and sentiments such raww inner revvelations you are an example for others of your charge dear lamplady
wwhat is it dear lamplady
Routine exam that went very wrong. A disappointment for all involved.
oh no my dear lamplady that dastardly bat miss fortune has deigned to dim your beautiful light but please keep your chin up hold your head high may those horns towwer ovver your patients wwith pride for one mistake and botched examination or accidental death does not a failure make you are a wwonderful nurse i am sure it did not go that badly did you havve to speak to the morticians again
They 8ade me fill out their forms, which I have grown so tiresomely acquainted with as of l8. 8ut my frown cannot last with your cheerful counten8nce on my mind! I shall turn up the soft light of my lantern, and ensure all those poor souls who have 8een entrusted to me are given their 8est chance to heal with my assist8nce!
that is the spirit i just knoww that evvery poor disenfranchised soul wwho wwanders into your wweb of care wwill come out the better for it your bad luck wwill end i just knoww it i havve a hopeful feeling about it dear lamplady