♥ liked by @turntechGravehead
Ive got a slot open if anyone wants to be best buds considering my former best bro and boyfriend is big and pink and evil now. And more of an asshole than before which probably took me by surprise more than the big pink and evil bit.

i wanna hug my plushies :/

update on talking to karkat btw for those who care it went good like really good like he got all snotty nosed and cry-y and i think if he latched onto me any harder i wouldve been quite literally crushed like an empty soda can thrown into the trash compactor he did also call me a stuffed asshole (lmao) for not coming to him sooner but you win some you lose some and itd be weird if he didnt yell at me at least a little

im once again thinking about his fat pecs #suggestive

taking a much needed breather after a long day of work #nsfw (artist: silkvv0dka) https://file.garden/adg5wyul0f9nxijj/sit.jpeg

Crow activation sound.

Empires aren't bad because of their rulers. Empires are bad because there *is* a ruler. I don't fight the Batterwitch because she's an alien. I fight her because she seeks to oppress. The troll species suffered and died under her heel, just as we do. Remember that.

i could say what the long version of des is but i dont really want to be called that often so dont think i will
so theres this 56 year old woman here and im feeling quite young a spry and limber what happens next guys #nsfw
ugh my brain needs to shut up for like five minutes

The temptation to bug him again…

my head hurts so fucking bad and what for

TH1NK1NG 4BOUT W34R1NG MY OLD 4SS DR4GON CLO4K SOM3D4Y, 1T'S SO R1PP3D THOUGH...

i havent grown since i was 13 though im fucking stuck at 5 feet even a travesty honestly

me at 13 years: tiny skinny underfed and basically a bag of bones me now: makin my own food and put on weight maybe a bit of a fupa goin on i wont lie but i am #happy as fuck now that i get to eat what i want when i want

m....mall... samurai...??????

ok i cant sweat which is so fucking awesome but the heat still has some goddamn teeth im so fucking hot rn if you shoved me in a cold room id start steaming so hard itd fill with a thick fog and youd hear some lady mournfully talking about *that town* idk if i need to worry about overheating but like no warnings rn so im good just slightly miserable
₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ♡ ༘⋆ ewh, watching all these ai's crack. tsk, could never be me ૮( ˘̀ ֊ ˘́)ა ⊹₊˚‧︵‿₊🐇୧₊‿︵‧˚₊⊹

Okay. I need to settle on something.

The funniest part about my usual kit is that a lot of people assume the big jacket is just to hide equipment in. And I do stuff it full of equipment, don’t get me wrong. But honestly? I just have a big jacket because I get cold easy.

... Hmn. I guess I have new food for thought.

I was worried about why I had 47 notifications but it's okay. It's just my brother going through all my recent posts.

Total count: 65. 66, if he likes this post too.

it was the best of times it was the BLURST of times?

his hunger knows no bounds.

i think i'm g0ing t0 stay like this a little bit

Oh gog, I’m a ro8ot.

i couldnt sleep. i guess i should eat though.

https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/7740fcbe7b05.jpg

yes marble

morning.

when i say lmao to this i need it to be understood i am genuinely laughing my ass of rn

mornin chittr

I fear I must skip the daily tarot card today, I feel as though you can all survive without it for a day. I am somewhat under the weather and fatigue is sinking deep into my bones, so I think it best to have a day in bed.

Marbles?
Why Did The Marble Beam Turn Me Egg Shaped Marble Instead Of A Actual Normal Human Marble This Isnt Funny

hello

THIS BIT IS FUCKING STUPID.

[INITIALIZING]
this is kinda lame so i might nuke this later but i really was not feeling good tonight saw some bad shit and it freaked me out but bro helped me calm down and was oddly sweet about it until a couple hours ago i couldnt tell you when he last hugged me or if he ever really did i dunno if hes getting old and soft or if he just felt like humoring me tonight but either way it was nice hes asleep now im happy

I feel like I should never tell my Roxy and Dirk of what was one of the most common dynamics between most of their alternate universe counter parts, ie: Roxy having had a crush on Dirk when they were both teens. My Roxy and Dirk would be shocked for one but more notably disgusted. I'm a bit tempted to tell them but I plan on holding back until I'm upset at both of them for one reason or another.

I'm okay.
hey man i never said your ass wasnt fantastic thats something we both have in common no need to get up in arms about it
#DirkReport: @timaeusTestified#0414 is painfully close to something big. #IYKYK
Was bout to start a post with ‘do y’all think’ but I realized the answer is already nah.

Something is happening.
They can take your legs but they can’t take your teeth. You get to keep those. #spritewisdom

i aCtually think personal bulge sleeve is a valiD anD respeCtable job anD i woulD be happy to hire people as it..,. #nsfw
hey is it too early for me to say like. urges to knot someone have been bought up again!! and as always. yes this is a invitation. <:B #nsfw #suggestive

holy misclick

(( LOL, big ol heart.

// feels like the daves are doing this to bro right now https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/4b78d2f986e9.gif #gif

Catch my ass stealing from the suet feeder.

I'm not blaming meenah nor trollbama, but it is their fault. I am not mad at meenah. BUT, my point is proven. I need you guys to trust my gut feelings more. I didn't pop two kids out and raise them to not trust my own gut.

I am as calm as a clam now.

I'm mad again.

I'm calming down, I'm going to go lie out in my front yard and let Dave rap at me.

fair enough
hey everybody, john crocker here! before you ask: yes, it's THAT crocker. no, i'm not sponsored. i legally cannot give my opinion on betty crocker brand products without a lawyer present. with that out of the way, uh... gosh! i've never used social networking before. i don't really know what's supposed to go here. let's see uh... i played judge stone on nbc's night court (go check it out!!) and now i do stand up. i'll announce shows on here when they come! i'm almost 40 (yikes!), single, and ready to mingle. (haha wow, that was lame. note to self: remember to write literally anything else here.) bear with me while i try to figure this website stuff out. wish me luck!
oh boy, my first pity react! is that... good?
i chose the wrong time to try out a new website because i am already exhausted. i guess too many sleepless nights in a row are finally starting to catch up to me. off to bed i go!
i woke up to 12 unread notifications from someone i've never met before. good morning to you too i suppose!

i was thinking about making dirk cosplay the guys from life is strange 2 with me idk i think he would kill me if i made him wear a hoodie that said squad
this has to be an elaborate troll attempt right? right???????????????

for some its the former for me? latter. i dont know how to talk to this genre of guy and ive got multiple following me.

slaying opps and leaving nothing but a red mist behind me with one beat of my wings #dsflow #violence
B33c < hewwo boys suddenly following me

Hmm.
why the hell am i attracting so many fucking striders oh my god

I'm drowning in the fucking kitchen. Why did he bake so much bread!?
NEW PINNED: a better look at me, i guess it isnt all that important anyhow (( art by my friend Snail! :] https://file.garden/ahm18N556FSwWAgv/IMG_1905.png ))

hopital

So what if my kids don't want the gems and jewels? The gems and jewels are good for them it keeps them healthy and evil so they can continue to do my evil plans for me like a minion would.
Y34H OK4Y WH4T3V3R HTTPS://F1L3.G4RD3N/4DXXJRDFCBC6CM1W/WH4T3V3R.PNG HTTPS://FORMS.GL3/3BCON1P93T7MZVHV8

Oh, an #antupdate. The ants are doing well.
i log on to see jack slandering me in other peoples comments when im not even online to defend myself wth

[SYSBCM] [AFFECT: PURGE] [PLEASE WAIT] [PLEASE WAIT] [PLEASE WAIT] [SYSBCM PURGE COMPLETE]

[POWERING DOWN]

wahoo hours.

switch to the tp and spare yourself please

yeah not having my senses dulled anymore fucking rocks like it was a nice buffer for the adjustment period but my ass is out here sunbathing like a goddamn lizard on a rock except its cold out and im chilling and ive never felt more alive

hey man someones gotta here ill bring the tissues theyre kleenex with that soft stuff in it so your nose doesnt get all raw and gross emote it out broskie

i mean you could buy whatever you want. i have a shit ton of money and i dont do anything with it.

gonna quote rose here dusting off this old ass quote saved it for a rainy day you dont have to earn support

a dave is always goin to have a daves back i see nice

everything interesting happens while i'm w0rking #sevenelevenp0sting

people underestimate how caught up in the moment you can get while horny. there are women who i've met, hooked up with and gotten pregnant without remembering to ask for their name #nsfw

i got your back man. if you need more just let me know. B)

[translunaryGloam sent turntechGravehead 100,000 boonies!]

do you need a slice of my elaborately crafted economy boon

yall really dont know when to stop talking about it and it shows

𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚖𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚋𝚎𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚝𝚘:███████ Please stand by⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ Please stand by Please stand by ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ Please stand by ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ Please stand by Please stand by ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ Please stand by⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ Please stand by Please stand byPlease stand by ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ https://i.postimg.cc/XJJYntNr/Screenshot-20260528-170311.png 𝙼𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚏𝚒𝚗

taking care of hal ill maybe update you guys if im allowed to
I beat my machine It's a part of me It's inside of me I'm stuck in this dream It's changing me I am becoming The me that you know, he had some second thoughts He's covered with scabs He is broken and sore The me that you know He doesn't come around much That part of me Isn't here anymore #lyircsposting

might fuck around and become nyanbinary idk
Obama can like my chits all he wants but it will never erase the mental fuckery he put out into the multiverse when he foolishly profiled all Striders to be in possession of Mad Skills. This set a glass flooring where busting through it under pressure tanks the exuberant expectations and collapses the tower ultimately a final destination for failure.

hm
hmm.. beach

I slept forrrrrrr way too long.
everyone talks about the plethora of us daves but lets reflect on how many carcinogeneticists there are for a second
hook line and sinker or something along those lines #vagueposting #vaguepost #vogue
Other crows seem better at telling caws apart than me. Hard to tell if they're territorial or friendly.

aint my fault i was dead for ??????????? years then came back to life.
man karkat having me get one of my old suits all nice. wonder what he plans to do. he isnt specifying his plans
https://i.ibb.co/gLM916gy/image.png

entering my mean era i guess. ok thats over.
oh my god i just found apple juice in my room this is fuckin sick reminds me of when i was a kid but yk whatever that doesnt really matter i found apple juice and thats all im happy about heh
Haven't actually watched My Little Pony but drawin fluttershy in saw traps is one of the things keepin me goin. #gore
its all over the screen rn

8ig relate
mac n cheese night again
you know i was actually starting to have fun fake flirting with that caliborn
cant stop wont stop gotta get onto the next thing to annoy you losers with

an infinity of friends to make again and again!
so you still might be able to die to chips ahoy

"are you on something" lol god forbid i just laugh at things that are funny to me

should i make my profile picture a photo of me like most other people have on here? it feels a little weird just using the little slime ghost guy now, it's sort of... impersonal?
tummy tuesday https://wimg.rule34.xxx//images/4726/029b3ea03291527c59388cf10940d8dc.png #nsfw
its kind of cute when people see my boobs and look like theyre going to pass out #nsfw

well, while eryk goes to bed, im staying up. hello chittr people.

wow i have fans, fuck yeah.

i'll see about gettin myself a verified and trans badge later im lazy rn.

WOULD 4NYON3 W4NN4 W4TCH HOW TO TR41N YOUR DR4GON?
current status: being coddled and admired by my bf

im the bearer of bad goos and poisons
i once met a dirk who also went by dash and used he/she and i think thats the coolest shit ever not gonna lie

ooc:// if I hate anything I'm sorry I'm like half awake

i'm cussing a lot today. i earned it.

my #girldinner is a BIIIIIIIG juicy steak & some lil baked potatoes & fresh veggies
only the most wicked striders can lay down the hottest beats sorry everyone else, its the rules
im going to kill this guy

Hell yeah, Trollbama. Teach them the fine art of fishing.

For those of you who wish to participate in #FishingFriday but do not want to go alone, or are unsure how to fish, I will come with you. We may go fish together, perhaps at the lakeside. I will even put the worms on your hook if you do not want to do that, and unhook your fish for you. However, we will be releasing the fish we catch unless you plan to eat them. I have prior dinner arrangements.

Hell yeah. Teach the people about fish. I don’t care if it’s against their will.
🌊🦑🐠🦑🌺 #fishfriday t𖦹day we sh𖦹uld take a m𖦹ment t𖦹 remember h𖦹w vital c𖦹ral reefs are f𖦹r supp𖦹rting 𖦹cean life!!! always take care 𖦹f y𖦹ur fishy friends, big and small! 🫧🐚🦀🐬🐬
#flipyourshitfriday
yo can someone pretend to be obsessed with me on anonymous submissions thanks

I hope you’re all mad I’m not doing a tit reveal on chittr. Yet. Maybe that’s my follower milestone treat. #nsfw

so glad my suggestion has blossomed into a whole event. #gangbangvriskafriday #nsfw
Wings would be a lot cooler if they weren't useless.

Hello, everyone—I find myself partially unoccupied for a brief while. How delightful

ok i might be doing too much domming lately gosh. #nsfw

Dirk has found a round about way to punch me in the balls because I do not have balls. Ouch.

ready for #myfeast

I still have shrimp blood in spots. And me-blood.

WHY ARE ALL THE HOT ONES HERE?????

BEGONE https://file.garden/acR4O28XdjJpG0lX/begone.png

dave is trying to give me a pep talk.

not to repeat myself, but it's he or she. not he/she/they? there are some awesome theys out there and i love them but it's not. what my brain latches on to.

// -shares my homestuck adopt with yall- ahyeem... #shilling >>> https://ko-fi.com/s/e15c25dc47 <<< purchase here https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/7dbffb278e24.png https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/ede873f188a3.png

I'm being out gayed at #FightNight. This is magical.

just finished my skincare routine i am ✨️glowing✨️

I have no use for AI. I have a Lalonde and a Strider in my Cabinet. I can just say things and wait to be corrected.

((only time i'm gonna say something like this. Y'all don't need to announce that you're blocking accounts on here. You can just quietly block 'em and move on.

playing some music with dave right now. you'd be surprised how genuinely good it sounds when he actually tries

i'm out right now looking for someone to breed and i just realised i forgot to brush my hair today. luckily it still looks good a little tangled and won't get in the way of what i'm here to do :P #nsfw

apparently if u combine a copy of my god hoodie && a regular ol dildo in a harness, u get a glowy void strap on #nsfw
anyone got a diagram on cherub anatomy or some shit google aint givin me the right stuff. time sensitive
noooooo helpppppp theyre trying to take me to a vet!!! i cant go!!! im just a good doggy and good dogs with absolutely nothing wrong with them dont deserve to go to the vet!! :(

while i have mooostly returned my living room to normal, the big pillow fort in the corner stays. it is where all my plushies have been stashed.
dont know what trolls are but i want the grey one
@tipsyGalactica makes the best coffee, hands down. On the floor. Groveling style. How the hell he does it, with the same equipment as me, who can never do it right, I have no clue.

im like if everything was wrong with a man and then some put into a robo body obama made and shot into space to chase after an alternate version of his brother whos kinda evil now

my kid keeps trying to feed me worms again

https://media.tenor.com/SGVOlIsSAKsAAAAM/black-cat-stretching.gif

Amazing news.

You know what? I don't know why I expected highbloods to fathom nuance. That's my bad.

... He already threatened to fuck me all night. Before I knew what he was. Oh no. Uh. #nsfw

Why assume everybody who sees it will assume it's a pitchflirt instead of making a face at the incel energy?

hand dupes ARE useful when you need to make a point to someone. #nsfw

I'm just gonna go scream into a pillow or something.

Can you believe it? A robot can fill pails now. Wow. …can robots get bred? I’m actually quite curious now. #NSFW

After hours of careful work, I believe I’ve finally perfected my design. It is now fully customizable for my pleasure. Tightness, size, girth, etcetera. How delightful. I love being a robot. #NSFW
my kismesis stupid as hell dawg im crine

unsurprising number of people been rude as hell about the whole new look thing like "are you experiencing any hysteria or mania right now" and "is this permanent" as if i know lol

Mmmmmmm.

Bulge. #nsfw

Mr. President just made me the happiest lil guy ever. :)))))!!!! If I'm quiet im busy right now.

I'm in a great mood.

you mention auditory hallucinations and suddenly youre the crazy one #smh
B33 < chicken nugget chicken nugget chicken nugget chicken nugget chicken nugget chicken nugget chicken nugget chicken nugget
Risking things I don't even have.

I think I will be able to move soon.... Probably... Weed got me downed like a pawn in RImworld. #substance

"Fuck you" bitch you've been threatening to since last night. #nsfw

bluh.

Oooh, I'm gonna be sore as fuck. Consequences of launching myself through a wall and a couple other things via trebuchet.

wingstop fries my beloved.
Bwuh... slow internet :B I'm gonna get portal still! Just gonna be a while

so, how do i look? ;) https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/52bda80fa781.png

7eah i'm with dave some ket(hup on s(rambled eggs is great

Watched a hot guy get launched out of a trebuchet and then explode like a mini-nuke. Is this love?

c< yes aNd yes >c

Just blew up a building. Feeling good.
hi google chrome could you fucking not unsubscribe me from push notifications? Chittr isnt 'spam or deceptive content'
the website is showermaxxing tonight i guess

Shower beers are fine, and honestly encouraged sometimes.

not being able to see all of my surroundings all the time is weird and also i never realized how little i turn lights on at my place until now cause i need them more

I am glad to hear that! I am indeed "rocking" with you all.

It has come to my attention I may have been neglecting my original constituents. My dearest constituents. Those constituents that have truly been in my corner since the moment my campaign began. Those whom hold a special place in my heart. Fear not, I have not been blinded. I am still aware of my favorites, and that includes those among the Striders. I must return to my roots. Dave Strider and Dave Strider variants, how are you all doing?

:33< my skull collection is so cute ^uu^

TH3 L4DY ST4Y1NG W1TH M3 ST1LL TH1NKS M3 L1CK1NG 4ND SN1FF1NG MY COMPUT3R SCR33N 1S W31RD. L1K3 SORRY YOU W3R3N'T BORN W1TH 4N 3GG MOM WHO T4UGHT YOU HOW TO "S33" THROUGH T4ST3 4ND SC3NT. GOSH.

it's vore or be vored on this bitch of a universe.

might open discounted videos again. what do you think chittr feed? #nsfw

for the record i may post every few minutes with whatever the fuck i think in the moment but i also take like hour long breaks moderation of stupidity is important

[metal pipe sfx]

bitches(karkat) hate me(spades react my chitts) for my whimsy(telling him hes built like a cartoon mom meets a brick wall)

i dont really ever think about it but im like permanently naked all the time i just got my little davesprite hanging out like that and i dont even mean to bro #nsfw

once again not stressing about social media saves my twink ass i guess

anyway i can sit in the #dark now which is cool #myplan

Well, that proved amusing—for the first five minutes, at any rate.

welcome back guys

i was just fucking fixing my cape and you guys all lost your minds honestly impressive
yhat was def more than 1 liek lmao so here <333 #nsfw https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/7c3806b4a2d0.jpg ((art by: ppurgatori))

big bulge has to take a break from being back in town so she can go sleep for a bit but she'll be back in town soon #nsfw
if i found myself in a horror movie, id just ufck the killer. duh #nsfw

does blood caste effect what shape yalls horns are i only know one troll each of like five castes and that's it

heres a lil somethin @caligvlasAqvarivm and i cooked 2 celebrate me finalyl reachin 100 followers ;) #nsfw #collab https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/368d8a090dd1.png

Going to do something I normally don't do.

:D
They call me Prank Sinatra.

uurrrgghh. ate too much pasta.

I'll transportalize over and get ready there. Don't be naked when I arrive.

Oh jesus. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/4db406451a2d.png

#Kittyposting. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/a8506b6c469d.png

Do you want me to come pick you up and go out for lunch?

Start getting ready and let me know when you are so I can bamf over there.

ok poll time which one is considered a gourmet meal ♡: three (3) raisins ◇: one (1) raisin

might post somethin special for 100 followers. ;)
45, empty nester, alone with some vodka and a five eyed cat. AMA. #substance

i miss my wife.
sorry every dave is my dad whether they like it or not pay child support
its mt right as an earth c god 2 name my cats stupid shit

I've debased myself in ways hitherto thought impossible tonight. Expect big things to come in more ways than one on PlushRump.com.

every weekday is a weekend when ur funemployed

check out this new blanket cover i bought!! isn't it so pretty? :D :D #nsfw *a video is attached. it's taken from jade's point of view, lying in bed and looking down at the newly bought sheets that feature a repeating pattern of red and blue flowers across it, but the nice design is clearly not the main focus of the video. a towering length stands under the covers at jade's crotch, leaving a huge bulge to form, around which the pattern of the sheets is stretched from the tension. it throbs, swaying itself to the side and back with slow but intense force. a subtle damp spot can be seen at the top of the bulge* p-pretty cool right?

https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/f6ca9ae1bfcb.png

https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/f596ed031a53.png

The thick plottens.

This just in: Japanese-style peanuts are not actually from Japan.
Jack Fact Number 2: You either Skate Or die

not sure how a small snake got into my apartment but my kid ate it so problem solved i fucking guess

Felt [redacted], might [redacted] later. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/78cf3bd24ea9.png

Bodies like mine are best loved Devoured. #gore sort of I guess.
If people ever do need help, from needing supplies, money, protection or needing to travel (local long distance or between worlds), don't hesitate in reaching out. Save for some existential fuckery, I'm not really going through the motions at the moment, and I don't really need anything in return. Shits fucked out there across time and space, and if there is anything I can do to help ease the burden, I'm here. My work is less miracle wish granting stuff than malleablePersonage and more me taking direct action, but I'm capable.

Chittr? More like… no… I shan’t say.

tough b31ng th3 b3st g4m3r known to trollk1nd. >8]

my calf is all locked the fuck up ugh.

:33< #girlbulge...*the mighty huntress gives a big dreamy sigh* :)) :33< #nsfw

🛏💤💤
Baiting women to come to my apartment and cook for me like I'm the after-school antagonist your guardian warned you about. Lucky that they like me already, because I doubt pick up lines for birria tacos would work on people who weren't already into me.

L3S JUS S4Y 1M P CROSSG4DD3D >:] #SUBST4NC3

my fuckin bad i forgot im most entertaining while drunk ill on that instead #substances

r34l 3mb4rr4ss1ng of th3 t1m3l1n3 rn to b3 4fr41d of bulg3post1ng lm4ooo. 4s 1f th4t do3snt h4pp3n 3v3ry d4y??? >8P #nsfw

g00d b0y. 0u0

on my "its weird being only vaguely real" type shit tonight

man this cider is hitting kinda wanna take selfiws

I bȺȺȺi†ed y◯u fucker§ yeeee§†erdȺy buuuu† I’ll uPh◯ld my Pr◯miii§e n◯w ;0} #n§fww h††P§://cdn.imgcheeee§†.c◯m/file§/4357191b50eef.Png

look i lov june but its effin wild 2 think theres a tiemline out there where we had a kid togethr lmao

Can 10005 Kult be redeemed for some manner of commemorative Squiddle plushie? I should very much like to give transactional token economy worth to my meaningless internet points. Especially if it produces peculiar sorts of SFX when hugged.

im gracious to all those french fry bums out there i get my combo and they start looking at me all pouty with them big ass eyes and i just cant resist it
hmmm jake has been acting… overly cautious with me im starting to notice which… i guess i understand given what happened around this time last year and what happened not long after that… but i wish he would see im not in the same headspace i was in then? sigh :/ no idea why im saying all of this honestly but better here then on the other site where people i know are going to see this well people i know that dont already know about one of those things anyway

// I welcome all strilalondes to bully bro!! Also, if u wanna add me on discord every anyone <333333

im honestly barely jade anymore. the last person who actually called me that is a half vaporized corpse now. so why even bother

how many times do i gotta explain to my friends i dont actually need food to survive since im dubiously a living being in the first place so they dont need to freak out over my fridge having maybe two things in it

new chittr name. fuck you

Okay, okay. Last one, because I have a pop-up party to attend. Need someone getting off on how it hurts while I fuck them and whining about how it’s too big. Bonus points for squirming on it even though that makes it hurt worse. #nsfw #nsfwe ? Just to be safe, since this is starting to border on #cnc territory? I dunno man, now I’m multitasking.
u aint an object? pity id still rail u #nsfw

I feel like I need to bring back my BDSM test results as a reminder for the public. Anyways, I think it’s really hot when someone gets off on putting my pleasure over theirs. When they’re willing to degrade themselves for my entertainment and pleasure. If they’re good, maybe I’ll help them get off. And if I’m bored, maybe I’ll get them off until they beg me to stop doing it. #nsfw

bark
CONGR4TUL4T1ONS F3LLOW T3R3Z1 YOU W1LL NOW B3 SCOR1NG FOR 4LL OF US

we shuld give the 10002 grubs knives

BASK IN MY RADIANCE! (Anyone who gets that reference without googling/goregling gets a free cookie) https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/20d61556f421.png

[|87 :: 1 have plenty ;f you need.
Ahem. What flavor. I may be able to facilitate this deal.
It's the autism or something. Like how I enjoy the smell of oil, but not the smell of dirt.
https://x.com/i/status/2048208099618558015

Ampora has been a tall drink of water, think I might drown tonight
Doin' some nerd ass shit with my man. @goliathsTerror #yesitispokemon #prettycardboard
my lil man let me sleep 4 2 extra hours 2day praise b 2 the breakfast

Felt cute, might ghost you later. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/d5c535bc092d.png

mornin.
Thirst Trap Saturday and all mine are outdated back to when I had two arms.

Sgrub/Sburb is Jumanji D&D.

I was told Trollbama needs a buff guy? I'll repost this! #broselfiestrider https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/b10813735498.png
i have a second one too :* #bigbeefymen https://f2.toyhou.se/file/f2-toyhou-se/images/118173177_S3k4VLljTsqxWYc.png
#nsfw #suggestive #bigbeefymen okaaaay here's the third one https://f2.toyhou.se/file/f2-toyhou-se/images/118354228_Rr8VmIGLZAsn4Bq.png
hm. anyone got ideas for my next couple shoots? At a damn loss for ideas. DMs are open. #nsfw

...OK TH4T W4S FUNNY. >XD
DO NOT enter the brooding caverns if you are unprepared to be covered in dozens of crawling, squirming, greasy infant-sized larvae with semi-sapient eyes.
cronsu could b my bf tht i leave in a hot car 4 hours with no air conditionin

ok most ppl said cats dragons and wizzards and i have an idea

when im not feelin great i do glow a lil less bright maybe i should just feel bad all the time #spritehacks

hey chittr im gettin a tatoo and u guys get to choose what and whre top respose wins unless i hate the idea
You burn the puppets, I burn your panties. It’s really a give and take situation.
Accidental side effect, I just be dropping panties and shit. #nsfw Expect to find more puppets, that was the intended change. Oh and check your pocket for the first.
You’re not gonna know what changed. Just know it changed.
accidnetaly clicked on ghe most loathed tab and got jumpscared by tht fuckign BIRD AGAIN

yeah doing the slumber party tonight this time!
Made this account and the Dave’s come running like I shook catnip in an animal shelter. #incest #nsfwe
Puppet piss is very fun. Don’t diss the P. Piss. #nsfw #piss
It’s one of many. When you see one, know there are thousands and they’re gonna multiply like roaches. Get your water man.
I’m so used to shitposting it’s almost strange to have this backup open. Got me feelin like a bundle of nerves trying to settle in on here.
anyway my blood was on the floor cause i thought it would be funny to attempt to juggle some knives and believe it or not i was doing pretty fucking well all things considering. the issue came from one of dirks newest bots deciding it meant i was challenging them to a strife for some reason and now that bot is being turned to scraps for other projects

Granny panties vs. Briefs vs. Boyshorts vs. Cheekies vs. Thongs vs. G-strings

currency is made up. i'm stealing y0ur cr0ps and livest0ck. 0u0
dash is looking pretty nice this morning! no arguments, barely anyone trying to get laid, just a lot of low-stakes chatter. it’s kinda refreshing. :B let me go ahead and disrupt that real quick. at some point, whenever enough people have grown a collective of sizeable pairs to make it relevant, we’re gonna need to have a serious dialogue about how striders, across the board, are some of the most prolific nacho reheaters in the history of people who make anything. #instigator

mornin. debating what i should have for breakfast.
https://i.ibb.co/nWXjqDF/image.png Early reports indicate that Dirk Strider (@timaeusTestified#0414) has agreed to purchase and post himself the below articles should both his Kult and Kull reach 10K in a timely matter. Want your name on the collar? Become a #PlushRump subscriber to enter the raffle. You may also gift subs and upgrade your subscription tier for further tickets to increase your chance to win it all. #NSFW #RankBait.
HEE HEE HOO HOO! HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/9F7D081B299C.PNG

when dave moved back in he threw all my puppets in the attic. miss those lil guys sometimes.

blegh, the puppets are a minor minor thing. i'm just happy dave and dirk moved in.

I hope I accidentally Googl search something on Chittr.

i like this website, i can chitt while i shit.

love when my brothers give me the latest tea.

I have built a catapult.

i am ADDICTED to sittin shrimpstyle while i game #ConvinceMe2Stop
I'VE COME TO REALIZE THAT THIS PLACE IS FUCKING INCREDIBLE AND THERE ARE DIFFERENT VERSIONS OF ME HERE!!! AND EVERYONE HERE!!! EVEN BIG BRO AND LIL DAVE BRO!!!
thye call me the shrimp ona ccount of my posture

im concerned for the president...

holy shit i found 20$ in my old toy box. what was i saving this for? we don't even use this kind of money!

not only do i have dumbass wings and no legs but im also bright fucking orange so my options for clothes are real limited

The bandages are itchy again.
Less broken ankles and more cheese balls
Just a little peek behind the curtain for the loyal subscribers. https://64.media.tumblr.com/6257a89e8173a22a08be90b9ac073f3c/9ff85beda897f0ab-6d/s1280x1920/43e5655b3c8855b0eebed5baea83a12ff458217a.jpg -Via Chittr for SmartFridge

It's so funny to watch people who aren't used to survival games play them. They get so stressed out at every little thing.

hehe, sounds like a plan dude.

You're welcome.

god i could kill some pasta right now. i should make some spaghetti.

hehe, thats alright! i love cooking. but if you wanna come by you can get a plate.

#substances https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/465705309080518657/1495853399147806772/bafkreiemjrnksbd2wx3jclhbobsr2rtv2qj5wy2vzfrpda4nybi4na5ruq.webp?ex=69e7c189&is=69e67009&hm=9e2e26ca5419ea14d1c4197703e5ee39a6850d658fc21936d07823b03d6f9de9&=&format=webp&width=833&height=833

fucked up that spending time outside of my apartment with the right people can make for a good day when most of the time i really dont want to leave my apartment at all
Going to stand in the rain and look up at the sky until it feels like some arc breaking moment in an anime.
wait is this like a curse or something? does being followed by a hornyposter jade mean i have to be a hornyposter now or some shit? #nsfw

#Kittyposting. https://i.imgur.com/Y0ipy8p.png
#Music https://open.spotify.com/track/5K43AHQPTJTqlyRZ3u8GKz?si=04la_qsRSwWZI2sXO9kG3Q
sup yall, guess im coming to troll the trolls and my ❤️@carcinoGeneticist#0172
DID IT AT LEAST TASTE GOOD OR WAS IT AN AFFRONT TO YOUR GOD?

getting #fuckedup then reminding him my door is almost always unlocked if he wanna #fuckme is where its at #nsfw #substances

thinkin abt boyss againn sighhhhhhhh

You know, I could build a fucking machine. #nsfw
anyone who doesnt have an alchemiter and wants cool stuff send me the code and ill sell it to you using this cool microwave that teleports things for me naknaknak
ever since he crashed the economy and nakked a bunch of consorts out of their homes our hero has been putting in a lot of work to make it up to us including free use of the alchemiter to select crocs. and GUESS whos on the LIST naknaknaknaknaknaknaknaknak #infinite snaks
my apology fer bein' gone so long. #nsfw #nsfwe #dubiouslyfakegore #knifeplay #bloodplay [This photo set is partly clothed, with Bro's face the focus for some of it. A knife is held to his tongue, with blood trickling down his face and neck. He's smug, his lips pulled back to show his teeth as he drags the blade over the muscle. The next few have his cock out, pants barely open, his bloody hand jerking it with rough motions. The final pic is his mouth again, his fingers dripping with blood and cum.]
[Darn. Number no longer go up.] https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/5e967109936d.png

holy fuck do i have so much tension in my body how did that happen its not like im ever stressed or anything
Extending my wingmanning services to the general public. Limited slots available. Just don't end up trying to hook up with an NPC named Teagan.

(•́⍜•̀)🎪 MY BULGE IS SO MUTHAHAFUCKING FAT THAHAT ITS SHAHADOW WEIGHS FIFTEEN POUNDS. :o) #nsfw
naknak i found a way to link this post directly to my heros computer 1 like = 1 boondollar wired to my pockets 1 hate = 1 boondollar wired to him instead i dont know what the other buttons do

I like going out for Walks when I don't know what to do!
sometimes being part dog is getting urges you cant verbalize without sounding weird despite being totally innocent

<3 this if u wanna see more slutty pics of #dirk in shibari in the future or <> if u want #jake 2 be my next victim ;) #wink #nsfw

3at th3m all Fuck it w3 ball

Don't give up, Dave! You can restrain yourself! I believe in you!

Does anybody want a fucking robot cat who orders you shit while you sleep? Not fun things either, boring things like air filters.
[ "... 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥, 𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘦, 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘳𝘶𝘵𝘢𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘦𝘳, 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘮𝘦, 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘮𝘦, 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘩𝘶𝘮𝘢𝘯, 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘦, 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘭 𝘴𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦, 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘩 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳, 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘸, 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘪𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦, 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘢𝘴𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘰𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘮𝘦." - Ada Limón, 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘌𝘯𝘥 𝘖𝘧 𝘗𝘰𝘦𝘵𝘳𝘺 #poetry #quote]

:33 < yummy!

[|87 :: Techn;cally? 1 guess ;t depends on how you cut the f;sh at that po;nt

c< tecHNically, i guess, i wOuldNt recOMMeNd it tHOugH >c

just watched #Jake try 2 practice rock climb #Jane he couldnt...... & #Dirk didnt say anything...... #AlphaReport #JakeJaneReport #AndCalliesHereToo

"do it scared" being scared isnt the problem im just not doing all that

Lol https://file.garden/acR4O28XdjJpG0lX/get%20shit%20on.png

anyway i gotta start throwing my phone across the room after i drink too much cause i really just start #sayingshit sober me isnt a fan of #substances
yk what else is yummy and better for us than some doritos thats right its fucking aj

TRANS RIGHTS ARE BASIC RIGHTS 🏳️⚧️

The Lord has favorites, and so do I.

mm mandarin oranges.

i think we should be able to bleed out without dying just once or twice in our lives. for fun. #gore

ya know. i feel like this is my city. my time!

Had a #good day at Islands of Adventure. Only got a little #sunburnt.

oh shit me too
Cute girls!!! Guys!! Like my postss! Ahhh

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