#mental-health
꧁Chittr, ithinkiwanttobe a girl i have wanted that for a while. i like...she and her...and i like being called pretty. i like imagining myself as someone's dainty friend. sometimes. i look at woman. and i think i want to be like that. and then i think about )(er. The Empress is a woman. Not just... A Woman. She is what womanhood looks like in my pan. She is beautiful. She is enormous. She is important and perfect. SheseverythingIamNot. So, when I think "I WANT TO BE A WOMAN" there is another part of me that immediately thinks that's ridiculous. Like I am putting on a crown of paper and pretend...Read more
{{this is roxys autoresponder or rr! roxys havin a panic attack and will b back later sry}}
... Actually, I'm kinda blasting thr∞ugh these steps. Baddest bitch in this medcenter. They might even let me d∞ ∞utpatient, s∞∞n, since I have a supp∞rt system. #substance #mental-health
███████ christ they are reading my ███████ chits. Fine. I'm an addict. And I've l∞st c∞ntr∞l ∞ver my ███████ addicti∞n. ✨✨✨ ███████ BYE. #substance #mental-health
is it bad that it feels comforting to be on the edge of fear? it's sort of nostalgic. maybe it's safe self harm, because i can turn it off anytime i want to. i think. #cw-self-harm #mental-health
A - collection of - unfinsihed - lyrics - a mix - of my friend's - and i- ... > Sinner sinner I hear you call Oh sinne I hear your whispers Oh sinner of green Oh oh.. You haunt my dreams Lone in your study Sinner sinner What do you plan? Do you waste the time away Watching all from where you stand Oh Sinner What will you do? When i die I want an friend to bury it Find seeds to plant I want to be buried in a shallow grave Flowers to grow from out of my ribs And when I die Don't let the empire know its true So that they can ...Read more
—-- OOC POST —- (There’s a few mentions of #nsfw , #substance and #mental-health in here.) Your name is ██████ ██████-- ... Your name is KAIKKA MOHDEM and you love YOUR HUSKTOP in a way that means you’re very obviously consumed by it and all it brings you. It's where all your VIDEOGAMES and MOVIES and SEXUALLY OBSCENE FICTIONAL WRITING is, but your main time-waster is drawing EROTIC PORNOGRAPHY. You’re also ADDICTED to REWARDING ACTIVITIES like CHRONIC MASTURBATION, SOCIAL MEDIA, CIGARETTE BLIND-BOXES and GOREDASH, whereas the latter two can be delivered right to your door, which is a...Read more
𝚃𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚖𝚎𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚢 𝚋𝚎𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚐𝚜 𝚝𝚘: @watchingauthor " I Remember When We First Met; You Had Knocked Me Onto My Back And Brandished A Stick At Me. Talking About How Trolls Outside Of Jades Weren't Allowed In The Brooding Caverns. I Can't Remember The Rest Of It Besides Downset Eyes That Glared Into Me Like I Was Nothing But To Be Culled Below His Shoe. The Caverns Were Dark And Felt Cold To A Young Troll Who Hadn't Learned Her Way Around. I Remember When You Stuck Out Your Hand And Held It As You Let Me Out. I Remember Vaguely In Blurry Sets How You Started To Let Me Come Around And You St...Read more
[#HITTR DAY 121 I'M $TARTING TO THINK NEEIHT I$ HOT AGAIN ]
I think i miss my mother.. and my mama but i have my mom so i should be happy and its weird that an adult misses their mama and mother.. i mean my mama wasntactually like a lusus like my mother but she was reallt nice.. i know that trolls shouldnt be raised by other trolls thats unnatural and it only happened as i was a special little rat who had to steal their youth as my mom was too big and i was too small and so as a special little rat i got to have my mother mama and another person to make sure i didnt die and i know i shpuldny miss them as ijusy ruined their lives but i think i just miss my mother i ...Read more
oh hi disasociative episodes i thot u were takin a brek #mental-health
I wonder what it feels to cry when you're sad... i ahvent been able to i dont kmow if i rver cried as a grub wither.. sometimes i debate if i force myself to cry will i be normal will i feel bettwr if i cry like a real normal troll will you be able to see that im a real troll? #mental-health
guess who had a panic attack on the way 2 the convenience store? #mental-health
fuck i um am i pretty? i just feel so gross n disgustin rn and idk pls #nsfw #cw-self-harm #cw-scars #mental-health
tried lookin at my reflection again i was jst so fuckin disgusted #mental-health
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- ♱ⴵ-∊ pȺΣ♱ mƗgⴵ♱ b-∊ d-∊Ⱥd Ⱥnd ⴵƗΣ♱Ωry bu♱ Ɨ Σ♱Ɨll ♱Ⱥ|⟨-∊ Ⱥ ♱Ɨm-∊ ♱Ω lΩΩ|⟨ bȺ☪︎|⟨, -∊v-∊n Ɨf Ɨ'v-∊ l-∊♱ gΩ Ωf 屮ⴵȺ♱-∊v-∊r nΩΣ♱ȺlgƗȺ Ɨ ⴵȺd fΩr my ⴵΩm-∊ du-∊ ♱Ω my ȺbyΣmȺl ☪︎ΩndƗ♱ƗΩnΣ. Ⱥ♱ ♱Ɨm-∊Σ, Ⱥ♱ ♱ⴵ-∊ mΩΣ♱ fȺƗn♱-∊Σ♱ mΩm-∊n♱Σ Ɨn my mƗnd. Ɨ ♱ⴵƗn|⟨ bȺ☪︎|⟨ ♱Ω ⴵΩm-∊, ♱Ω ⴵΩ屮 bȺd ♱ⴵƗngΣ 屮-∊r-∊, ⴵΩ屮 Ɨ y-∊Ⱥrn-∊d ♱Ω Σ-∊-∊ my ⴵΩm-∊ plȺn-∊♱ ♱ⴵȺ♱ Ɨ 屮ȺΣ ♱Ⱥ|⟨-∊n frΩm ȺΣ Ⱥ 屮Ɨggl-∊r, ⴵΩ屮 Ɨ n-∊v-∊r ⴵȺd ☪︎Ωn♱rΩl Ωv-∊r my Ω屮n lƗf-∊ bu♱ 屮ⴵ-∊r-∊ Ɨ 屮ȺΣ gΩƗng. 屮ⴵ-∊r-∊ Ɨ♱ ♱ΩΩ|⟨ ♱ⴵ-∊ -∊ffΩr♱Σ Ωf ȺnΩ♱ⴵ-∊r mȺn ♱Ω pull m-∊ Ωu♱ Ωf my ΣƗ♱uȺ♱ƗΩn. Ɨ mƗΣΣ ⴵƗm Σ♱Ɨll, ⴵ-∊ 屮ȺΣ lƗ|⟨-∊ BullΣⴵȺr|⟨dȺd ♱Ω...Read more
the body dysmorphia is rly bad 2day lol #mental-health
The mini Lalonde is trying to get me to go get diagnosed. We all know I ain't going to therapy or getting medicated so there's no point- and it's just outright wrong. Dunno what a P adds but I definitely don't have OCD, I'm not anxious about anything.
⦓ Don't go to the places where the memories are that's where the memories are. Except here I am. In my hive. Where the memories are. Except the ones I can't even recall because they were taken from me. There's a whole floor I don't even go in. There's bloodstains I can't scrub out. Things are missing that should have been there. I don't sleep in my respiteblock anymore because it reminds me of her, and I never look at the stairs going up to the gates because the damage done to them reminds me of the final fight. ⦔ ⦓ ... Ugh. Floor time again I guess. What else can I even do? What else even is there? An...Read more
⦓ ... And the mood has once again swung down. But I did enjoy the upswing so I hope next time I can hold onto it a little longer... ⦔ ⦓ ... Their last post was five days ago. I can't help but worry. Don't ask who I'm talking about, I'm just venting a little... ⦔
an anon asked: https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/a1a4293dc749.png yeah but thats prolly bc i have a lot of diasocitive episodes or feel lite headed lmao
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- Ɨ 屮ȺnnȺ ȺƗr Ωu♱ mΩr-∊ bu♱ ♱ⴵȺ♱'Σ ΣΩm-∊ Ωf Ɨ♱ fΩr nΩ屮, mΩr-∊ ♱Ɨm-∊ ♱Ω Σ♱-∊屮 Ɨ♱ Ωv-∊r. Ɨ f-∊-∊l lƗ|⟨-∊ Ɨ'm ☪︎ΩnΣ♱Ⱥn♱ly buff-∊rƗng ♱ⴵrΩugⴵ -∊Ⱥ☪︎ⴵ Ⱥnd -∊v-∊ry ΣƗngl-∊ ƗnΣ♱Ⱥn☪︎-∊ Ɨn my mƗnd lƗ|⟨-∊- ΣΩm-∊ |⟨Ɨnd'v-∊ mȺ☪︎ⴵƗn-∊ ♱ⴵȺ♱'Σ Σ♱u☪︎|⟨ Ωn 99% Ⱥnd ♱ⴵ-∊n r-∊Σ-∊♱♱Ɨng ♱Ω 50% ȺgȺƗn. #m-∊n♱Ⱥl-ⴵ-∊Ⱥl♱ⴵ. -- [/ΣȺmΣȺrȺ'Σ Σ屮ȺnΣΩng./]
[/-∊n♱rΩpy gr-∊yƗng Ωu♱./] -- Ɨ ♱ⴵƗn|⟨ Ɨ ♱Ⱥ|⟨-∊ ȺlΩ♱ Ωf ♱ⴵƗngΣ fΩr grȺn♱-∊d 屮Ɨ♱ⴵ ⴵΩ屮 lu☪︎|⟨y ♱ⴵ-∊ ☪︎Ɨr☪︎umΣ♱Ⱥn☪︎-∊Σ ΣurrΩundƗng -∊v-∊ry♱ⴵƗng 屮ȺΣ. ♱Ω ♱ⴵ-∊ pΩƗn♱ 屮ⴵ-∊r-∊ Ɨ juΣ♱ -∊ngȺg-∊ Ɨn ΣƗlly Ⱥnd ƗnȺn-∊ ΣⴵƗ♱ ♱Ω ♱ry Ⱥnd pȺΣΣ ♱ⴵ-∊ ♱Ɨm-∊ Ⱥll b-∊☪︎ȺuΣ-∊ Ɨ ⴵȺd b-∊-∊n d-∊nƗ-∊d ♱ⴵ-∊ ☪︎ⴵȺn☪︎-∊ ♱Ω l-∊♱ Ⱥll Ωf ♱ⴵȺ♱ Ωu♱ 屮ⴵ-∊n Ɨ 屮ȺΣ Ⱥ |⟨Ɨd. ♱ⴵȺ♱'Σ d-∊fƗnƗ♱-∊ly 屮ⴵy, ƗΣ Ɨ♱ Ⱥ bȺd ♱ⴵƗng? nΩ, Ɨ♱ ƗΣn'♱ Ⱥ bȺd ♱ⴵƗng ♱Ω b-∊ Ⱥbl-∊ ♱Ω ⴵȺv-∊ fun 屮Ɨ♱ⴵ Σu☪︎ⴵ pΩ屮-∊rΣ, mΩΣ♱ly ȺΣ Ⱥ ☪︎ΩpƗng m-∊☪︎ⴵȺnƗΣm Ωr Ⱥ dƗΣ♱rȺ☪︎♱ƗΩn. p-∊rⴵȺpΣ Ɨn ♱Ɨm-∊ Ɨ'll fƗnȺlly ΣlΩ屮 ♱ⴵ-∊ fu☪︎|⟨ dΩ屮n fΩr Ωn☪︎-∊, -∊ȺΣ-∊ up, m-∊llΩ屮 Ωu♱ Ωn ♱ⴵ-∊ unΣ-∊r...Read more
[BEGIN MESSAGE] ... when we are being crue| tt0 each 0ther 0n|ine. [ACTION:QUERY] muzt we make digz at #menta|-hea|tth? [END MESSAGE]
၄⋆၃ you ever feel lonely despite being surrounded by some of the best individuals you xould ever ask to enjoy being around you question mark yeah yeah dot dot dot i think i #yearn for isolation onxe again so i xan have a valid reason for feeling lonely please laugh at me im a jester that suffers for you entertainment shout pole #VENT #mental-health
၄⋆၃ it is xruxial that you do not listen to the intrusive thoughts in your pan telling you to do awful things to the people you xare about dot dot dot do i need a nap in the sopor or am i just a broken troll question mark
ok yeh its defo a dysphoria dysmorphia double team suplex + the disasocitive episdoes lmao i rly need 2 find a new therapist dont i? im getin a bit scared but ill prolly b fine idk #mental-health
no but leik if im not zoned tf out i feel like an observr of my own life as if im watchin it from a 3rd person perspective an its rly frekin me out #mental-health
oh the disaocitive episodes r gettin worse thts prolly not good #mental-health
︻デ═一 went t0 the d0ct0r5 and apparently 1t5 n0t called "be1ng 51lly" and 1 m1ght have d1550c1at1ve 1dent1ty d150rder :/ #mental-health
ne\/ermind i almost buried myself outside with the rest of them just now #horror #mental-health #self-harm?
︻デ═一 y0u kn0w 1t5 gett1ng bad aga1n when that 1tch c0me5 back. 1 th0ught 1 wa5 0ver th15 #cw-5elf-harm #mental-health #vent
The last time I spent a moment with other people. Jade, John, Dave and a few more. I didn't say a word. I stared outwards towards the black sky. My eyes wandered, I'm quiet to not interrupt anybody. I don't feel worthy to comment on anything, the most I did was save Jade's jacket from falling off the bench. It was clumsy and awkward. Jade just laughed and told me it's okay. There was no thank you. Maybe next time, I'll try and be more extroverted. Next time.
sobbing and crying from my own self-caused social isolation its cool tho bc im wearing these dope ass shades #mental-health
)(øw løng døes it take tø exit a møurning periød? #mental-)(ealt)(
𑄝 Sitting with people I love, but because im not getting any attention even by 1 person, mentally spiraling. If you deal with this, ur not a freak and I see you <33 #mental-health #vent ? #BPD ੭
𑄝 chittr you get my rants about BPD!!! Bpd is like.. actually so stupid.. I say this as a cute troll WITH bpd so fuck you! But actually, seeing how quickly I switch up from having fun to suddenly "i hate ALL OF YOU FUCKERS! YOU WANT ME DEAD! Why don't I just fucking go!!!" and it's so daunting to realize after that thought process or actions that you were attached to the person and even seeing them happy with someone else (even if you're not with them) made you spiral so hard you want to just self isolate because they do not deserve your spirals and they didn't *ask* to deal with it. Personality disorde...Read more
((okay im going on a break and might be quitting this handle. the discourse became too much for me to handle and i just couldnt keep up with it anymore. sorry for like all the discourse and drama and shit i caused and then just dropped it at random. thank you all for being a wonderful community i truly loved most of the time i spent rping her on here #mental-health ))
((so i decided i am not going to be quitting. i slept on it, and i can deal with a bit of stress and mental strain. i dont have a life anyways so its better to do this than do nothing and have consequences here for that)) #mental-health
((i might need to take a genuine break from chittr and all things rp related for a bit this is genuinely causing me to have physical issues i havent been hungry in hours since this shit happened. well see how im feeling tomorrow but i might have to go on a break)) #mental-health
The Chronicle of the Heir, Part I. "How The Heir came to be." The Chronicle begins itself within the confines of caverns, in which that of an heir is born, a male heir in an empire most matriarchal with every other being that of an heiress, this empire is large and vast and inherently oppressive within its nature, separated by that in different castes. The heir is considered something of an anomaly, for it was the first male amongst its caste. The caretakers of this heir to be are left at a crossroads at its discovery after having felled its foster bull-shark, looking over it, the young heir snuggl...Read more
i mIsS It. LiKe sItTiNg hErE DoInG My gReAsE FoR ThE NiGhT. i lIkE MiSs tHe fUcKiNg rItUaLs. ThE CoMiNg tOgEtHeR AnD ShIt fOr wIcKeD KiCkBaCkS. tHoUgHt lIkE It wAs hOw hEaVy tHe aIr wAs wItH BlOoD. sHiT StIlL GeTs mY PaN SpInNiNg cAuSe lIkE ThE BlOoD WaS ThE BeSt pArT. wAdInG ThRoUgH AlL ThE DiFfErEnT CoLoReD PoOlS, cLeAnSiNg mY MeAt bEfOrE AdDiNg mY OwN To tHe dEeP, dEeP PuRpLe pOoL. tHe lImE TaNkS HaD RuN DrY By mY FuCkInG TiMe. ThEy dIdN'T EvEn bRiNg tHaT ShIt oUt fOr sPeCiAl oCcAsIoNs. i mIsS ThE HoRrOrItUaLs aNd tHe hYmNs. MiSs fUcKiNg fEeLiNg lIkE ThE WoRlD WaS FuLl oF AlL ThEsE BiG N LiL MiRaClE...Read more
wE ArE LaYiNg tHe fUcK DoWn aNd nOt gEtTiNg tHe fUcK BaCk uP (O: #cW-SeLf-hArM #mEnTaL-HeAlTh
--[[OOC intro post - mentions of childhood #abuse , #discrimination , #mental-health ]]-- Gokkou is my trollsona. If you, the mun reading this, dislike Gokkou, you dislike me; hard block (OOC) me. Gokkou Aritun || Gemza || 11.5 sweeps || Nonbinary || they/them || 06/17 || Pansexual || Derse || Maid of Doom || 5"3 (161.5cm) || Riflekind & psionics Likes: Linguistics, music, voice synthesizers, astronomy & astrology, anthropology & sociology, video games, learning, collecting things, manga & books, fashion, diversity, pride Dislikes: Close-mindedness, their mental health, mother kitsune, social stru...Read more
now probably a good time as any to make better plans. and i'll do it right here for accountability! i'm gonna try seeing my psychiatrist again. especially uh, on the topic of my meds. #mental-health
someone's knocking at my door. time to finally get up after... 2 days? #mental-health
man, i feel so weird. it's been so long since i've hesitated just even saying hi to people over text. #nostalgia #nostalgic #depression #mental-health
i planned to go outside yesterday, but i haven't left my bed yet. #mental-health
and i want it to be wrong when it's over and done is there really no happiness without this feeling? give me a drug bottle your love is there really no happiness without you near me? #lyricposting #vagueposting #mental-health https://open.spotify.com/track/01xyAVYhR2QJ9YsiFnGzw7?si=22e4e651fefa4ec5
alright, no more silly, stupid mistakes! meds make me talk weird and act offputting. blegh! i am officially declaring #sobriety ! i can totally be happy without being conditioned weirdly by some stupid drugs. i can do this. and when i'm done, i'll make it up to her. #day1 #dayone #sober #substance #recovery #mental-health