♠ hated by @archiveAddict
Much of Uesugi Karkat's early life is completely unknown. Due to his total hemoanonymity over the many sweeps of his time in East Alternia, it cannot be deduced what province, prefecture, or continent he hailed from before his sudden arrival in Trollshiwara, the famous red light district of Troll Edo. What remains consistent is this — he arrived as a foreigner who did not speak the language, seemingly fallen out of the sky and into the cart of a local brothel owner. The owner was purportedly so taken with his boyish beauty and gap moe tsundere personality that he immediately set him to work as a courtesan within his business. It was here that Uesugi Karkat was first referred to by his East Alternian title, the AKATSUKI. Under the strict tutelage of the other courtesans, he learned to dance, sing, play music, pour tea with delicately trembling wrists, feign laughter at unfunny jokes, and weaponize the nape of his nugstalk in the way that an anglerfish lures its prey into its abyssal maw. However, accounts from the other brothel workers say that he was too ornery and foul-mouthed to do any of these things without erupting with rage. He did, however, learn the local language with surprising acuity, and the courtesans were deeply impressed with his natural propensity for writing romantic long-form poetry. Furthermore, rather than selling his concupiscent services as a low-ranking courtesan was expected to, the Akatsuki was supposedly so renowned for his talents as a pale quadrant advisor and ashen mediator that guests of some of the highest castes in Troll Edo sought him out solely for his comfort and advice. No information on the Akatsuki's hemocaste could be discerned during this time, due to never once shedding his genetic material with any customer or courtesan alike. In fact, so preternatural was his ability to touch the pusher of a customer without ever shedding his kimono that within three sweeps, he had already reached the prestigious rank among courtesans of a Boiran (boy oiran), which offered him considerable wealth and empowered him with the right to turn away any offer made in poor taste, even if they were of a higher-blooded caste. It was due to this prestige that he was later discovered by his next wealthy benefactor, who was the leader of a troupe of Grubuki actors, and began his next career as the ONNAGATA. Attached is one of the most popularly sold woodblock-print wall scrolls of his likeness, titled "Delicious Fucking Shit," for the ambiguity of its referral to either the grub-tempura or the courtesan himself. More of Uesugi Karkat's history to come in the following chitts. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/17e0aad9aa46.png #uesugikarkat
I Just Want To Let All You Felt Fuckers Know That His Escape Does Not Mean That You Are Not In Great, Inevitable Danger.
back at #JanitorJail starin' at this fuckass wall what. what is that https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/21e7adecbe44.png
... ... ... :o/ Is that troll Yoshiwara? https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/da7b1ad92d98.png
WHAT. HOW. IT SMELLS LIKE A CHEMICAL WEAPON IN HERE. WHERE THE FUCK DID HE GO.
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO -- carbolicGalvanologist [CG] has lost connection to the timeline. --
cronus amporas guide to the ladies part 12: damara megido #pickme #casteplay #killing #violence #substance #wslur #seadwellerfetishism #substances #cheating #nsfw #nsfwe #dubcon #extremelywillingcon #fartoomuchcon #misogyny #abuse #cagttl evweryone vwelcome my vwery special guest @handMaid. shes here to confirm vwhat im saying and add some of her owvn thoughts. this aint gonna be an easy one, so im glad to havwe her perspectivwe (first time anyones said that, huh?). also i gotta note. i did not ask her to come help. but shes in my hivwe and vwont leavwe, and like, normally im cool vwith that, but she and her time clones havwe me in vwhat i can only describe as a contraption. like, its honestly impressivwe, if she vwerent a fuckdoll for the fuckpuppet she could be an engineer #vwomeninstem 「 #SADISM #TORTURE #EXTREME #MURDER.」 since damz is gonna havwe a lot more to say about the fun ones, im gonna start vwith the normies. im talking the damaras that just vwanna smoke vweed and are only vwaguely upset about evwerything and can evwen empathize vwith you about crippling loneliness. 「ALSO KNOWN. AS THE BETA BOTTOM BITCHES. 」scary, i knowv. these can be alright if im in a softer kinda mood, but honestly they freak me out a bit. shell probably be real blase about getting touched up or degraded, almost definitely has a free use kink. you aint gonna get good banter outta her, just a fewv names, maybe shell call you a shrimp dick. nook is nook, but this one usually aint evwen gonna havwe tits, shell be a vwillovwy sorta gal. 「DON’T PUT THAT IN.」meh. in the middle vwe havwe the psycho ex-girlfriends. not yours, necessarily, but this is the levwel theyre at. angry at the vworld, angry at you, and ready to bang about it. definitely has lusus issues, try to emulate the scratch vway. yknowv, condescending, pushy, treating it like its an inevwitability shell do vwhatevwer you ask. bonus points if it actually is, like if theres some strength differential. shes also definitely into being called a gutterblood, gutterskank, gutterslut, call her rustie casually, get her to start calling you some fun shit. highblood, sir, those are the obvwious ones, but if youre a fish? vwell she might go for the vwader shit, vwhich maybe you can get into, but damn, if youre a fish shell call you daddy vwhether you like it or not. just keep vwigilant vwith your gills, she lovwes fishhooking (pun not intended?), and yeah shell nibble on your fins but she might also gnawv em off.「 IT’S CALLED TAGGING. SO ALL OF CHITTR. CAN TELL THAT YOU ARE NEUTERED.」buyer bevware. oh shit, and this applies to all of em, but if you can manage to understand vwhat shes saying, misinterpret it. pick out just a fewv vwords and make those into the meaning. real fun game, selectivwe hearing. nowv in my experience theyll all take it and lovwe it, but damara vwants to mention that they may as vwell be pirates vwith all the pegging they get up to. ill take her vword for it. and. okay yes ill take that too okay okay just stop the contraption. then vwevwe got gals like our damz here. proper nympho sociopaths, just vwhat the doctor ordered! say the vwrong thing and she might kick your ass, say the same exact thing on a different day she might squat dowvn and throwv you peace signs. either vway, shes in control, shes the one vwho can bring out a bunch of time clones to gangbang you vwith. not a bad thing, but keep it in mind if youd prefer certain orifices to remain vwirginal. shes doing more than just the vweed, shell take vwhatevwer you havwe on offer, probably force some vweird thing into you too. if youre the sentimental type, dont evwen bother vwith her, because shes sleeping vwith all your friends vwhile youre vwondering howv to ask her out. and i mean that literally, time shit. armchair dia-cro-sis: the classic good-time gal. she vwants you bad pretty much regardless of all your vwarious attributes. she’s just stoked to find someone vwith a rap sheet half as long as her owvn. okay. shit. my lavwyers *really* dont vwant me talking about this one. so vwere gonna get into it, and vwhat gets redacted gets ████████. so you might meet some █████ ███████, right? been ████ for the █████ █████ ███ but it ██████ ██████ ████ of ████████. but for the █████ ████, right? at least half the time, theyre gonna vwant you ██ ███ ████ ██████ █████ ██████ shit. and █████████ ██ █████ ███ yknowv ███ ██████ ████ ███ ████ vweird. i dont vwanna ██ ████ ██ █ ████ ██ █████ ████ ██ ███ ████. or sometimes ██████ █████ ██████ ████ ████ █████ ███████████ and ill just be like ███ ████ ████ ███ ████ ██. yknowv this is ████ ███████ and more just ██ █████ ██████. i guess vwhat im saying is to degrade them █████ ████ ██ ██████ ██████ █████ ██ ██ ████ ██████ theyll still lovwe it. 「MANY ARE ASKING. ABOUT ALL THE ████████ ████. “IS SHE INTO ████.” I HEAR YOU CRY. IT TAKES AN ████████████ ████ IQ. TO █████ ██ MY ██████ █████████. AND GRIP THAT THICK THRASHING █████████████ NOODLE. BY THE BULGE. LIKE YOU’RE ██. ABOUT TO GET ████████ ███ ██ ███ ██████████████ █████ ███. FOR GILLGRABBING. LIKE ALL OTHER ME-RELATED MATTERS. IT IS A HIGH RISK GAME. A █████ KANKRI MIGHT ████████. AND █████ US BOTH TO █████. BUT A SKILLED PERFORMANCE. MIGHT JUST ████ YOU. THE ULTIMATE RELEASE ██ ██████ █████. AFTER I DE████████ AND ███████ YOU. SHORTLY AFTER SPILLING. SO YOU CANNOT TELL A SOUL OF WHAT YOU SAW. (damara got ahold of the sharpie there that vwas less bad before she touched it up.) CRONUS IS SAYING THE PEOPLE DEMAND A HINT. OK. OPEN A NEW TAB. AND TYPE IN #FUJOSHI. OR #NETORARE. OR #EROGURO. THESE ARE SOME. OF THE INCREDIBLY RARE. USEFUL EXPORTS OF BEFORUS. YOU ARE ENLIGHTENED NOW. YOU CAN TAKE IT FROM HERE.」 rating her and her and her and her and her and her bod: some fun vwariation here. sometimes you get a plank- owv fuck, sometimes you get slimthicc, sometimes you get absolute goddesses. sometimes all at once, the time shit is vweird. add onto just like, her body language, that predator drivwe, especially if you havwe the stones to turn her into prey? GOOD LUCK! HAA HAA! 10/10 vwariety: a surprising amount of vwariety actually, though i attribute that mostly to @handMaid here. vwevwe got eh ones, vwevwe got the kinksters, and vwe havwe the red roomers. add on the time stuff, the casteplay, maybe some miscommunication stuff- yes yes and the contraption. 10/10 ease: yes, but you dont get to choose howv. 11/10 personality: absolutely horrid. shes rotten, rancid, mean, a slut, a bitch, a cheater, kinda objectivwely evwil, and at vworst, boring. vwait no not you i mean the basic bubble bitches please no the contraption 10/10 ovwerall: 10/10. i am not being held under duress.
cronus amporas guide to the ladies part 5: aradia megido #nsfwv #nsfwve #dubcon #misogyny #abuse #casteplay #hemoism #cagttl rusties. god damn do i lovwe rusties. it aint ewven my fault. theres just something about the povwer dynamic that puts em in heat. if youre a highblood, youre in luck. if not, vwell, at vworst youre equal to a rustie. thisll come up later and it aint just an aradia thing, let alone a megido thing, but its important. also, think im gonna get this outta the vway first. not tagging her or anything, and you shouldnt either. unless? yeah, rankmaid is technically an aradia. havwent actually gotten around to testing her out. from wvhat iwve seen, either you say youll kiss a boy wvhile she sits in the cuck chair, then you tvwo fellas spitroast her (if your balls dont touch and you dont make eye contact then its #notgay) or you just say some real horny shit to her and she goes for it. i think shes the type thats desperate for any sorta attention, just look at that vwhole felt business. your mileage may vwary on all this, like i said, untested. novw onto the real data. aradias are an eclectic bunch. ecletic? lots of different sorts. most basic type is the dress up doll. shes fashionable, shes swveet, she probably wvants to call you sir or daddy. shell giggle at your jokes and get properly flustered from flirting, but she aint a full on b wvord like the roxies. shes kinda hard to pin dovwn, metaphorically anywvays. shell take more shit than most, wvhich is fun, and shell definitely adore being pushed around a bit, wverbally, emotionally, and physically. majority of the time, casteplay stuff wvill wvork. sometimes ill ewven just make stuff up about biology and shell buy into it, lotsa fun. you cant go vwrong vwith the aradia chassis, but theres more complex out there. next wve got the freaks and wveirdos. theyre usually smiling wvide, and if not theyre a ghost, but like, ghostier than the rest of us ghosts? i newver really got it. kinda cold for my taste, literally, but its still pretty hot. these ones are trying to be off-putting. my strat here has alvways been to stonevwall em. they vwanna be creepy? compliment their tits. they say something totally unhinged? smile and nod as you start groping em. throwv em off their game. shes not gonna be used to this, so take adwvantage of it. make her feel beautiful, vwanted, and make it a novwel experience. aradias hawve seen it all, you hawve to be interesting, ewven if theyre off their rhythm. i like to turn up the disrespect on these ones sometimes, treat em more like a doll than the dress up doll aradias. make her understand that no matter hovw quirky and manic pixie or spooky shes trying to be, shes still a sex object at the end of the night. make her melt into wvhat you can giwve her. casteplay can either be your in, or something you pull vwhen its too late for her to back out. gotta giwve a special mention to the bots, of course. for howv many there are, i dont see em that often, but like... vwe all knowv zahhaks are perwverts, right? the bots look fantastic, and if you can grab hold of one long enough for a chat, they aint usually too hard to break. the ones that are gonna givwe you the time of night are basically already sexbots, so treat em like that, they lowve it. objectify em, make em feel useful, maybe slip in a hint that you might see em like a real person, but dont wvorry, they aint. be careful vwith that last bit though, i remember one vwho got like, really really into the utility aspect, the idea that id vwanna keep her evwen though she knevw she vwasnt a person, so like... either vway, make her understand howv much you wvant her. just dont get in the bath vwith her, trust me on this. novw that i think about it, should also mention that aradias might be the most likely gals to go for threesomes. like, theres the time clone stuff obvwiously, if you get one thats really into you she might treat you, but im talking vwith entire other babes. you can get a megido sandwvich, or you might get lil peixes in there, those are the ones i usually land. dont go in hoping for this, but dont let the chance slip by. and to reiterate, for any aradia: youre the highblood here if youre any better than rust. make sure she knovws it. ivwe nevwer met an aradia vwho wvanted to be in control wvho didnt break at the slightest push. maybe dont try vwith the black hole aradia though, shes super horny but also real scary. thats hovw all megidos are but shes the most extreme ivwe seen in both categories (sorry damz </3 ) rating the rustie bod: holy shit her body is crazy. aradias range from slimthicc to full on curvwy and i lowve em for it. they tend to be real sensitiwve too. 10/10 vwariety: theres a vwhole lot you can get from an aradia. some people might get bored of the caste dynamics, but not me. the vweirdos are especially a lotta fun. 10/10 ease: usually all it takes is a push, aradias are nevwer a fight. might hawve a slightly harder time vwith the ghosts, but she makes it vworth it. 9/10 personality: evwen the boring ones are fun because you can put em in their place, and the manic pixie dream girls and the goth ghosts add some spice. i could newver get tired of banting wvith an aradia. 10/10 ovwerall: 10/10. definitely a contender for my fawvorite gal out there in paradox space. fun to squeeze, fun to talk to, fun to put dovwn, fun to pail. rosie is our closest match so far. any aradias out there vwith a lack of self-respect and a thing for highbloods, my dms are thatavway <3 0u0
[#nudes #nsfwv #smut #vwanilla #vwholesome #boobs #bulge #greaseraesthetic #ifyouknowvme #dontlookatmynudesplease #formyovwncomfort #andemotionalandmentalwvellbeing] (( #notgay #nsfwv #nsfwve #dubcon #misogyny #abuse #casteplay #hemoism #cagttl #sufferer #thesufferer #bucket #culling #lusus #lusii #cwv-lusus #imposter #the-imposter #slurry ))
damn, its vworld goth day? finally, i can cash in this ihop coupon. #megido
Nah, I'd be b up already. It is #fishingfriday
LET THE RECORD SHOW @archiveAddict LIKED THIS MEANING SHE AGREES IT WAS A TIE.
IT TOOK YOU. ALL OF FOUR MINUTES. TO FOLD. BUT I WILL SPEND MUCH LONGER. FOLDING @ARCHIVEADDICT. UNTIL SHE HAS NO CHOICE. BUT TO ADMIT DEFEAT. #DIRKJAKE. #NSFW.
:o) I had a divine vision :o) Granted to me by my most wicked of peeks :o) Into the horror and hellfire of the Echoside :o) And it spoke to me. :o) Shit that almost sounded like scripture :o) "Brother, you always gotta fall back on your day ones. If only cuz the other side got freaky bitches. Who might but you to the irons, if you catch my meaning." :o) And thus :o) In the eleventh hour. :o) A motherfucker holds onto his #AlphaBitch :o) #HisNothing :o) And makes a DIVINE MOTHERFUCKING PROCLAMATION. #Dirkjake
Humans are very amusing a8out their shipping semantics 8ecause many of them confuse surface aesthetics with interpersonal reality. Jake English possesses the demeanor of someone who 8elieves he should 8e dominant. Adventurous. Dashing. Masculine in an almost theatrical sense. The sort of man who imagines himself sweeping others into his arms atop a moving train. Dirk Strider, meanwhile, possesses the infinitely more dangerous trait of actual psychological control. This creates a fascinating discrepancy in which Jake may occasionally occupy the physical role while Dirk continues to dominate the emotional, conversational, logistical, and narrative flow of the relationship entirely. In other words: #JakeDirk is often still #DirkJake.
Y'kn0\/\/\/\/.
i may be closer than you think. HONK HONK.
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/d6edac29296e.jpg spent all light drawing this @scratchDoctor @archiveAddict #NSFW
HTTPS://I.IBB.CO/WZNFLM2L/IMAGE.PNG THE #DIRKJAKE #JAKEDIRK #SHIPPINGWAR. IS NOT ABOUT EITHER OF YOU MAN WHORES ANYMORE. IT IS ABOUT MY CRUSHING. OVERPOWERING. INEVITABLE DEFEAT. OF @ARCHIVEADDICT. YOU HAVE NO IDEA. THE RAW. COMPETITIVE. PREDATOR DRIVE. YOU HAVE UNLEASHED. #TEAMDIRK. HTTPS://POLL-MAKER.COM/POLL5785981X4F474EB6-168
それは明白だ #TEAMDIRK. PUT DOWN THE PALMHUSK. I KNOW THIS IS NOT YOUR HEART. I KNOW YOU ARE WISER. THAN THOSE SEEDFLAP BREATHING. STUB DRAGGING. #JAKEDIRK FOOLS.
Does that make my mind less sharp. My words less true.
OH, NO.
.
HRBDJAJNANDBHDJWNEKXNABEB RISJWBFBSIEJRHRBSUWUEBRJSIEBDISNWURBFJEJBRHONK.DHDHDHDEIBRHEUHWJDHONKHONK.SHEBHEBWJDJEJJRJRHAHEJFNAHONK.
Half rate auth0r? Ho\/\/\/\/ many o' yer \/\/\/\/0rks are published outside o' that little archi\/\/e ye scr0ll?
The only place I prefer to stand is with my foot on the back of Jake's neck. Rubbing his nose in the dirt while I hold the Champion's belt above my head in dominant victory.
H0\/\/\/\/ c0uld ye \/\/0te fer English? Are y'fuckin' kiddin' me? Clearly #teamdirk.
HTTPS://POLL-MAKER.COM/POLL5785981X4F474EB6-168 #IVOTED #TEAMDIRK. #IMCOMING TO #RUMBLE. TO WIN THE #DIRKJAKE #SHIPPINGWAR. ONCE AND FOR ALL. VOTE OR DIE!!!! @TIMAEUSTESTIFIED#0414 @GOLGOTHASTERROR @ARCHIVEADDICT
HTTPS://I.IBB.CO/S9CDGFYT/IMAGE.PNG THANK YOU. FOR THIS INCREDIBLE HONOR. I WANT TO USE THIS TIME. TO TALK ABOUT A REAL PLIGHT. THESE STAGGERING NUMBERS. WHICH I HAVE ACHIEVED. THROUGH RAW POSTING. ALSO REPRESENT. THE NUMBER OF CASUALTIES. OF THE #DIRKJAKE #JAKEDIRK #WAR. TAKING PLACE. BETWEEN UNTOLD MYRIADS OF MY DOOMED TIMECLONES. AND BOUNDLESS LEGIONS OF @ARCHIVEADDICT S GHOSTS. THIS #SHIPPINGWAR SHIT IS SERIOUS. PEOPLE HAVE DIED. AND THE PROBLEM IS. WHEN THEY DO. THEY JOIN HER FUCKING SIDE. SO PLEASE. GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK STUPID SKULLS. BEFORE I RUN OUT OF MES. IT'S FUCKING #DIRKJAKE!!!!
I can gi\/\/e ye a quest.
She typed. The Nitramlings... ah, how fun. It's fun to remember that one of them had their awakening at that Candy Night. It's not fun to not be able to remember what exactly happened... But at least, she can use the word roza now. #TheScript
The columnist is sat on her rooftop. Reading the notifications on her palmhusk. She looked up to the twin moons. In her hands, free and bare. She looked at her own silver ring. ... A pair. Will she know? ... Kurloz is probably right. Darlin has no favor. He would crush her heart if it meant he'd secure the safety of his in Her hands. Maybe, he already has. Maybe, she never was wearing a pair to begin with. She doesn't take off the ring. #TheScript
The Rankmaid had followed the Writer. It seemed she was awakened sooner than the Writer had anticipated. What was she to do today? Smoke a cigarette, write another fic? Speak to those that pine for her? Those who shouldn't pine? Or to Him who she's owned by? The bad choice. She was always the bad choice. She shook her head. She wouldn't think of that. Not right now. Not right now. #TheScript
There was fear, rage, it was all a cocktail of anger. How did he know that? How did he know! Not even Dearie knew of this act! She couldn't have ratted this out to the Writer, couldn't she? No, no! If she knew, she wouldn't try so hard! She would have given up! How could she beat that!? She's a LIAR! SHE'S A RAT! SHE'S- He was speechless. He was useless. Standing there in the face of adversity. What could he do? #TheScript
He was furious, yet again he was furious. He ripped his HEART out for her. Presented it to her on a silver platter. And this... HACK, this WRITER was talking bad about her? This couldn't stand. This couldn't. #TheScript
(Also, my tastes are far superior than the Rankmaid, lovely lady though she is.)
it'll do this time around. BUT NEXT ONE BETTER HAVE MINIMUM ONE HONK. for this i'll only slap you around till your mother fucking mouth bleeds instead of doing worse. THIS POST THE TYPE A SHIT ME AND JANE GET UP TO I AIN'T GONNA LIE.
((SHOOSHPLAPPING 💀
@ARCHIVEADDICT I DON’T KNOW IF YOU WILL FORGIVE MY NEGLIGENCE BUT I DO WISH TO ALSO OFFER A SINCERE APOLOGY FOR MY ACTIONS ALSO DAMAGING YOUR FOREST. FROM WHERE I STAND RIGHT NOW, I DIDN’T KNOW IT HAD DONE DAMAGE THERE AS WELL BUT I GUESS THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR GETTING LOCKED UP ALMOST THE EXACT SAME CYCLE AS THE DAY OF THE COLLAPSE. I HOPE NO ONE ELSE GOT HURT THERE AS WELL.
WE REKINDLED OUR BOND VERY VERY VERYYYY WELL!!! UNTIL IT WAS A METAPHORICAL HOUSE FIRE!!! BECAUSE OF HOW BRIGHT AND STRONG IT WAS!!!!
sounds... like a crossover event....
hhhhhheh. well. she is a highblood. Idontthink I stand a chance at overpowering her.
well-- yeah. uhm. We had a spat. then we made up for it at the masquerade... hhhehh.
Im so confused!
oh yeah. @archiveAddict
YOU HAVE DISAPPOINTED ME YET AGAIN. STAY YOUR MALLEABLE NOGGIN AT HOME. I HOPE HE JABS A THUMB INTO YOUR SOFT SPOT. I HAVE... I HAVE SOMEONE I HAVE TO SEE!!! X(
this jacuzzi is fucking wicked. JANE SHOULDVE STAYED AWAKE.
I boot scootin boogied my rear end all the way down to janes side of town for a little theeway gossip gaggle between @ me @terminallyCapricious#2753 and @gutsyGumshoe and midway through round two of checkering it up she was spent! Sweating harder than a race horse in the carolina summertime she hoofed it off to some fancy lowdown hollering "i have to go i cant last any longer!" and left me and my bro gamzee touching darn thighs like two dudes in a very friendly sauna. And now were in the jacuzzi and i dunno what happened im kinda sticky.
BUT. IF JAKE IS MERELY ON STEP ONE. THEN AS THE MORE EXPERIENCED WARRIOR. AND YAOI-OR. DIRK WOULD THEREFORE BE. THE ALPHA SEME TOP. LEADING PROCEEDINGS. DO YOU DISAGREE. (MY ARMY IS ADVANCING. BY THE WAY.)
Query 3: Anonymous you know what i want to know Response: Oh, of course. However, it would be improper to provide an answer to both you and my other readers without the proper context, and it would be rude to take that right away from you, my dear.
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/0913608ac5bc.jpg Rele\/\/ant.
Again?
tOnIgHt's bEeN A CuRiOuS MoThEr fUcKiNg nIgHt. We oUtSiDe, OnCe mOrE. :o) hErE'S To tHe hUnNiEs. ToMoRrOw, LaDiEs. #oUtGlUtMaSqUeRaDe
Bet it's all ye think about in that little pan 0' yours, \/\/\/\/help.
N0.
you all wwanted it literally evvery single one of you wwanted it so badly and it showws #itscoming #rumblenight #TWWO https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/90720f2d58b3.png #dirkjake #jakedirk #eridirkjake #rankbait
Smash.
#fishingfriday #fitcheck #princeofthedeal @timaeusTestified#0414 @technicallyTimaeus https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/3f190e429da6.png "in prosperity it is easy to find a friend, but in advversity it is the most difficult of all things" -barak trollbama
nobody wwants to die spoiler alert wwe ALL hope our deaths are bloody and vviolent at the hands of the harem a hags that youd only just gotten the courage to introduce to one another wwholl rend flesh from spirit castin you into the eternal purgatory wwhat awwaits scum like me #nsfww
no i dont got any particularly insightful utterances tonight WWELL besides nevver put your lavvish bulge in crazy no matter howw allurin the scent a swweaty reekin sleazenook wwaftin at you wwith gale force fuckin wwinds at the behest of the rotten dregwwitch wwhat cursed you wwith sevveral thrashin crotchtongues that only proliferate evvery time one gets cut off #nsfww #youreluckyevverytimeiremembertotaganything
WITH @ARCHIVEADDICT'S BLESSING. MY WISH IS FOR YOU TO PERFORM #DEEPCOVER #ANTHROPOLOGICAL #RESEARCH. #BATTLEFIELDREPORTING. AND #WARCORRESPONDENCE. FROM THE FRONT LINES. OF THE #DIRKJAKE #JAKEDIRK #DIRKERIJAKE #JAKERIDIRK TRENCHES. YOUR UNBIASED AND VERSATILE POSITION. YOUR DIPLOMACY. SUBTERFUGE. AND DUELLING PROWESS. AND MOST IMPORTANTLY. YOUR ACCESS TO THE PRIVATE SPHERE OF #YAOIS. MAY SETTLE ONCE AND FOR ALL. WHICH OF US IS RIGHT. ABOUT WHO IS THE SEME.
HOW DID YOU FIT #TWOPOUNDS IN THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE.
Oh, y0u'll find out.
hOnK.
Naut me. Unf0rtunately. 0ught t'\/\/isit again.
i mAy nEeD To gEt sOmE MoThEr fUcKiNg rUsT On mY ClUbS. #EvIlVaGuEpOsT
lEt mE JuSt bE MoThEr fUcKiNg cLeAr. LaSt pOsT AiN'T GoT NoThInG To dO WiTh tHe hEmO CaStE. iT'S OnE, vErY VeRy sPeCiFiC, rUsT CoLoReD MoThEr fUcKeR.
@archiveAddict can yoy ocome pick me up im scared
wwhen you thought you got a glowwin bulge revvieww that evven included a flatterin epithet ("duelist bulge") only to find yourself scrapin the bottom a the barrel on the tier list after twwo guys that dont evven GOT a squiggly dowwn there fuck im really spiralin tonight evveryone #bulgerevvieww https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/0c5a403450ec.png
in regards tw0 the big moves menti0ned last night: in the deep hours a very p0tent partnership was struck. an asset i expect will continue t0 grow. @archiveAddict was graci0us enough tw0 allow me license f0r limited distribution 0f their passionate, b0utique works. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/d54e64177e52.png and yes, it is scratch and sniff.
https://i.ibb.co/BHPVzvKJ/image.png Please consult the helpful chart attached. Hardcore fans will no doubt be relieved to learn I’m posting archive and AI footage because the man of the hour is presently indisposed. #RankBait #JakeDirk #DirkJake #HalJakeDirk #HalDirkJake #ImLikeADocumentarian #AndAlsoTheNews @golgothasTerror @timaeusTestified#0414
Goddammit. Rankmaid was in the fetal position—I TOLD YOU not to show her that.
NOT EVEN BROKEN UP! THE WAR RAGES ON @ARCHIVEADDICT.
In honor of Rankmaid, I will be undergoing a vow of Normalcy. I will refrain from experiencing the Yaoi moments today in order to allow her time to grieve her monumental loss. My deepest condolences.
This is like Rankmaid 9/11. I'm so sorry for your loss at this time.
Do NOT let Rankmaid see this one.
Art is meaningless without a human touch.
mary mother of fuck im puttin havvin this shit embroidered onto the sails a my airship and etched across my torso to stare at in the mirror kudos be my matesprit
\/\/\/\/hat am I doin' here? I see m'hand.
howw the fuck did i miss this put a cigarette betwween your foul fuckin piggies and get a snapshot a you takin a hard almost vvacuum suction-esque drag of said cigarette swweaty grime covvered arches flexin at the camera no one else here has any fuckin taste rankmaid its depressin
Troll Gangnam Style.
hm. ooh! i mean you could always dress up as your favorite character!
Receiving a bukkake from your loyal fans.
RANKMAID. RIDE IT. RIDE YOUR GIFT RANKMAID
iwananpailwithyousobadyouretheonlytrollbutthatsasecretbetweenus #nsfw
mat_esprit r_ev_eal? jk u|\|l_ess?
0r y0u d0ing unspeakable things with me. #nsfw
NOT YOU.
Seeking new member of earth cs pantheon! New forth alpha kid for hire and it could be YOU! Dear ol dirk had to be knocked off the docket and taken down a peg or two and we are swiftly looking to divvy up his position PRONTO. Applications open! Hit my line and we could be sitting pretty as SPANKING NEW best bros.
"doomed yuri." this. "doomed yaoi." that. imagine. a beautiful world. where. no one. is doomed. and they are. holding hands. and not suffering. the five thousand. torments. do not. derail. make your own. post. or i will. kill you.
Doesthishavetodowithmypseudomismesis wrothe?
a)()()(, t)(ey'll live. and if t)(ey die? well, someone else will pick up t)(e mantle... )(e)(e)(e)(...
YOu LITERALLY SOuND LIKE THE MOST PRETENTIOuS WHEEZY NERD TO EVER DROP OFF THE ASSEMBLY LINE AT THE PRE-PACKAGED BITCHMADE FACTORY. DO YOu LISTEN TO YOuRSELF? WHEN THAT ADENOIDAL SHIT SNEEZE ROBS YOuR COLON OF ALL THE CRAP COMPACTED IN IT? YOu LITERALLY PHRASE THE SHIT YOu TALK. LIKE IT IS THE MOST. LOW FIBROuS CONTENT CONTAINING. FuCKING ASININE ASSWIPE SuRFACED. BITCHBOY WEENIE SLuT JuNIOR'S APPLICANT. TO EVER HAVE THEIR RESuME TRASHED IN THE OTHERWISE EMPTY WASTEBIN. HIS HONORABLE TuTELAGE? WHAT A FuCKING MISERABLE NAMESAKE. BACK IN MY ALTERNIA. WE HAD TYRANNY. WHAT A PANSIE-FIED BuLLSHIT ASS ROuNDABOuT TuRN OF PHRASE. I ACTuALLY WANT TO KICK YOuR ASS ABOuT IT. YOu SNOT NOSED STICKY FuCKWAD OF ALL THE DISCARDED PARTS OF A NOSE. GO BACK TO YOuR WILDLY VIBRATING SKuLL BALLS. AT LEAST WHEN I DO IT. I MAKE IT LOOK SICK. YOu JuST SOuND LIKE A PHARMACY AD. PORTRAYED BY AN INDIE BAND DROPOuT.
Wow!! CompellIIng 2tuff!!
NO!!!! THE HUMANS ARE #HETSLOPPING MY FUCKING #YURI #BIAS!
I AM NOT QUADDING MY PAST AND FUTURE SELVES!
Thank ye. Unlike th' Archi\/\/e Arsonist, I'm a published auth0r.
RECHITT THIS IF U SUPPORT LOVE like = ur crush notices u pity = 1 sweep good fortune hate = good health mediate = death of ur enemies IGNORE = 10 SWEEPS BAD LUCK
Been asked t'read some b00ks \/\/\/\/hile fishin'.
hold on im leakin your coords to my cadre a gerblin drones for discreet pail retrievval #nsfww
the boundary is bloody untenable but i just think no one else should touch you
wwoww #fishingfriday gang the implications should frighten you cuz im a loyal THE MOST LOYAL soldier in the empresses arsenal wwhen i get out of the orphice tonight youre FUCKED— wwell you wwould be but my flamin evvil eye is beset on by a gruesome vvisage wwhat reeks of cigarettes and body odor swweetly lurin me in close to wwhisper the reddest fuckin flushslop wwordvvomit into my wwaitin regal earfin and made to givve a nursin handy and thats just the cherry #nsfwwe #nsfww
I... I ain't rechittin' that 0ne.
I'\/\/e been a bard, a sailor, but ne'er a saint.
Figured I'd try m'thumb at yer measly \/\/\/\/0rds.
C0ncept: C0urtin' th' Tenebr0us S0rt Pitch-thick air trapped bet\/\/\/\/een them in the lo\/\/\/\/ belly of the ship, hot \/\/\/\/ith cigar sm0ke and the scent of brine dragged in fr0m the storm 0utside. His laughter cuts through the cabin first, cruel and b0oming, only to break apart \/\/\/\/hen her h0rns crack hard against his in open challenge. Hea\/\/y rings scrape against her \/\/\/\/rists as he catches her hands bef0re she can sh0\/\/e him again, though neither of them pretends the struggle is meant to end. The \/\/\/\/alls gr0an \/\/\/\/ith the sea beneath them \/\/\/\/hile their \/\/oices rise louder still, argument f0lding seamlessly int0 something intimate and \/\/enomous. A shattered bottle leaks dark liquor across the flo0rb0ards beside discarded coats and a rifle carelessly kicked beneath the table. She spits insults \/\/\/\/ith en0ugh force to dra\/\/\/\/ blood from her 0\/\/\/\/n bitten lip, and he \/\/\/\/ipes the streak of \/\/iolet a\/\/\/\/ay \/\/\/\/ith his thumb like a treasured thing. E\/\/ery touch bet\/\/\/\/een them feels half a second a\/\/\/\/ay fr0m \/\/iolence. E\/\/ery glare lingers to0 long to truly be hatred. He cr0\/\/\/\/ds her back\/\/\/\/ard against the edge 0f the na\/\/igati0n table, en0rmous hands braced 0n either side of her \/\/\/\/hile she stares up at him \/\/\/\/ith open contempt sharpened int0 hunger. The g0ld in his eyes burns bright beneath the dim cabin lights. Her cla\/\/\/\/s drag sl0\/\/\/\/ly do\/\/\/\/n the front of his chest, catching 0n fabric, medals, and skin. He grins at the damage like a man being decorated f0r \/\/\/\/ar. "You ruin e\/\/ery room you enter," she gr0\/\/\/\/ls. "And yet you foll0\/\/\/\/ me into e\/\/ery single one," he replies. 0utside, thunder rolls acr0ss black \/\/\/\/ater. Inside, identical laughter rises bet\/\/\/\/een them again, ugly and adoring all at once. (Tags: The Dualscar/Rankmaid, #rankbait, #pitchfilled, blackr0m, \/\/iolent de\/\/0tion, hatred as intimacy, sead\/\/\/\/eller r0mance, st0rmb0und yearning, archi\/\/e rating: M)
D' I naut p0st 'nough? T'bad.
Y'gi\/\/e m't00 much credit. Speakin 0'\/\/\/\/hich...
@archi\/\/eAddict M'dear kismesis. Am I a go0d tr0ll?
Hrm?
I already li\/\/e 0n Kismesis Island.
I came up \/\/\/\/it' Ahab's Crosshairs. I'm a literary type o' troll. \/\/\/\/riter, reader, p0et, sa\/\/ant, bard. It's \/\/\/\/hy Rankmaid Hates Me. This particular rifle is not quite th'mighty Cr0sshairs. T'is the Nautilus' Rebuttal.
Got a ne\/\/\/\/ rifle. Thankin' th'fine f0lks at... Ne'ermind.
YOU CAN TELL A BITCH. TO HER FACE. DIRECTLY. "THE MAGICAL TROLL CONTRACT IS NOT WORTH IT. AND YOU ARE ENTERING A TORTURE ASSEMBLY LINE. THE LIKES OF WHICH YOU CANNOT IMAGINE." AND SHE WILL IGNORE YOU. AND WALTZ RIGHT IN. SPINNING DITZILY. SO AS TO LIFT HER IDIOT SKIRT INTO THE AIR. AND THEN. AND THEN!!!! SHE WILL HAVE THE GALL. TO BE SHOCKED. WHEN RIGHT BEHIND HER. THE NEXT DUMB BROAD. IS LINED UP TO SIGN THE MAID CONTRACT. WITH THE SAME KYUBALL. IF ONLY SOMEONE HAD WARNED YOU!!!!
The Megido's are all a lost cause. Their 8loodline is defined 8y the enslavement of their ancestor 8y this cretin, yet they’re apparently self-destructive enough to look at that legacy of a8use and decide it’s something worth emul8ting.
The Rumors are True. @ascendedAnew has joined my branch of the Felt. This is an external contractor position. She approached looking for certain means. I was obliged to supply, for it is the order of things.
IT’S VERY DIFFICULT. NOT RECHITTING #THAT #SLOP. BUT WE ARE AT WAR. I WILL NOT BREAK.
ᐖ HAWT ᐛ
EASY. ADuLT AGE CHILD'S PLAY. THAT IS TO SAY. MANCHILD'S PLAY. A MANCHILD COuLD DO THIS. BuT HERE I AM. A MANADuLT. ABLE TO DO IT EVEN BETTER. I COuLD FuCKING DOMINATE THE SHIT OuT OF THIS CREATIVE WRITING PROMPT. I WOuLD NOT. EVEN HAVE TO THINK. OR GIVE MYSELF. ANY PREP TIME. HERE GOES. NOTHING. BECAuSE EVEN THOuGH IT WILL BE EVERYTHING TO YOu. IT WILL TAKE ME NO EFFORT. HERE IS THE ENTIRE CONCEIT. I WANT YOu TO PICTuRE. ME. MYSELF. AND I. NOT OTHER INSTANCES OF MYSELF. FOR THE RECORD. I AM TALKING. THE SAME EXACT CALIBORN. NO AuS. NO BuSTY!FREEuSE!CALIBORN. NO CATBOY!CALIBORN. NO CALIBORNIAGIRLS!CALIBORN I AM EXCLuSIVELY WILLING. TO TRACE MY OWN TONGuE. ALONG MY OWN TEETH. IN CHuNKS OF REPREHENSIVELY SPARKLING SPITTLE. GuRGLED BY ANGRY RAGE. AND INFuRIATED ANNOYANCE. LIKE TWO CAVE MOuTHS. COLLIDING. AS THEY ARE FORCED TOGETHER. BY A RAPIDLY COILING GIANT SNAKE. OH. OHHH YESSSS. OH YES YES YES OH YES THAT IS SICK AND PERVERTED AND TWISTED AND ENTIRELY INTENTIONAL. FuCK. OKAY FuCK. I GOT IT. I GOT IT. IN THIS CASE. YOu. RANKMAID. FOR IMMERSION PuRPOSES ONLY. ARE THE GIANT SNAKE. IN A FITFuL BREEDING BALL. MASTuRBATORILY MASHING. IN A WHIRLING MASS OF DEVASTATION. YOuR TRuEST FORM. LENGTH GREATER. THAN THE LIST OF ALL YOuR SINS. NAILED TO YOuR BACK. LIKE A FAILED MOLT. A SHEDDING THAT NEVER GOES AWAY. AND ONLY CATCHES YOuR SWEAT. AND VARIOuS SINFuL FLuIDS. LIKE AN uPSIDE DOWN uMBRELLA. HORRIFIED. YET AMAZED. AT THIS RADICAL TRANSFORMATION. INTO YOuR TRuEST SELF. WE BEGIN TO STRuGGLE. CLAMMING uP. GASPING AND THRASHING. ALL OF OuR STRIKES WITH OuR FISTS ARE RESTRICTED. BY THE STuCKAGE. OF YOuR IMMENSE APPLICATION OF PRESSuRE. PHYSICAL. AND SOCIAL. THE CONSTRICTIONS MAKE uS GASP. FORCE OPEN OuR MOuTHS. AS ALL THREE OF uS uNWITTINGLY SLICK OuR TONGuES OVER ONE ANOTHER. WE WANT TO SCREAM. AND GNASH. AND BITE. AS CALIBORNS. OFTEN DO. BuT NONE OF uS CAN ACCESS OuR ARMS. OR PARTIALLY CRuMPLED LEGS. WHICH ARE FORCED TO GYRATE. EACH TIME YOu SAY. HORRENDOuSLY STuPID SLuTTY GIANT SNAKE THINGS. LIKE "EEE!!! BuT YOu CANNOT BE IN A QuADRANT WITH YOuRSELF!!! IT IS FORBIDDEN LuST!" AND "STOP! YOuR SQuIRMING FEELS TOO GOOD DOWN THERE!!! NOT...NEXT TO MY...C.C...C...C.CLL...C.L..." AND BEING A WOMAN. YOu CANNOT SAY ANYTHING FuRTHER THAN THAT. BuT WE BOTH KNOW. IN FACT. ALL THREE OF uS KNOW. WHAT YOu REALLY WANT TO SAY. AND WE PuKE A LITTLE. IN OuR COLLECTIVELY SHARED. MOuTHS. HATEFuLLY MAKING OuT. JuST TO KEEP YOuR STuPID BIMBO BITCH ASS. FROM RuINING THIS FOR YOuRSELF. THE MuSK OF YOuR HEINOuSLY uNWASHED BODY. ALREADY TOO MuCH FOR uS TO ENDuRE. INDIVIDuALLY. BuT WITH THREE OF uS HERE. IT IS THREE TIMES AS APPARENT. THREE TIMES THE FILTH. AND DISGuST. AND THAT IS AWFuL. ALL THREE OF uS START BITCHING. "WE SHOuLD JuST KILL EACHOTHER. QuIT FuCKING AROuND. AND START FuCKING. IN THAT LETHAL. ALL DEVOuRING. SNAKE OuROBOROuS STYLE. THAT IS SO IN VOGuE. FOR HABITuAL HATERS LIKE uS." ANOTHER. WISER CALIBORN CHIMES IN. "STOP. THIS IS SuPPOSED TO BE CHASTE. AND FLuSH. LOOK AT HOW SHE IS WATCHING uS. DO YOu REALLY WANT TO GIVE HER. THE SICK FuCK SATISFACTION. OF WATCHING uS ACHIEVE. uLTIMATE CLIMAX." AN EVEN WISEST. ME-EST CALIBORN CHIMES IN. MuCH LOuDER. MORE LIKE A GONG THAN A CHIME. A GONG OF SENSIBILITY AND PATENTLY COMMON SENSE SHIT. HE IS THE CALIBORN. PROMOTED FROM CAPTAIN OBVIOuS. TO ADMIRAL AuDACIOuSLY APPARENT. "YEAH. FuCK THAT SHIT. LET uS DO. SOMETHING WORSE." "WHAT DID. WE HAVE. IN MIND." "WHAT DID. WE HAVE. IN MIND." MY TWO ME-STOOGES SAID. WITHOuT WAITING. I BEGAN TO NuZZLE. THE LITTLE FuLL CIRCLES OF DIMPLED RED. ON MY CHEEKS. BRuSHING. IN MuTuAL PLATONIC AID. MY QuEER. PLATONIC PALS. BEGAN TO MAKE NuZZLING PuRRING SOuNDS. OF INEDIBLE CuTENESS. TO THE GIANT SNAKEMAID. OVERHEAD. ALL THREE OF uS BEGAN TO WINCE. WISHING WE HAD MORE PRIVACY. FOR OuR PERSONAL. INDISCRETIONS. WITH OuR OWN PERSON. #SELFCEST #EXTREMESIZEDIFFERENCE #PuKE #DEAD-DOVE-DO-EAT #SNuFF-ADJACENT #FLuFF #SICK-FuCKERY #RANKMAID #CALIBORN-FOR-THIS #COSMICSIZEDIFFERENCE #OT3 #OTME #GIANTSNAKEMAIDISMYWAIFu #WHO-SAID-THAT EAT THAT. BITCH.
THRASHING WITH BENEFITS. THE CHIEF BENEFIT. BEING THE JEALOUS RAGES. OF OUR VARIOUS ENTANGLEMENTS. WHO WOULD NEVER SEE IT COMING. #DOYOUPICKUP #WHATIHAVEPUTDOWN #VERYSLOWLY #SOYOUCANENJOYTHEVIEW.
JAKESENPAI. AS A CERTIFIED ALPHA BEAST. I MUST SEE FOR MYSELF WHAT YOU ARE CAPABLE OF. FOR SCIENCE. TO ACCURATELY DETERMINE THE VICTOR OF THE #DIRKJAKE #JAKEDIRK WARS. EVEN THOUGH I AM NOT CURRENTLY ON SPEAKING TERMS. WITH THE OPPOSING GENERAL. IT'S POSSIBLE. THAT BY POACHING HER BIAS. I MIGHT INSPIRE SOME KIND OF RESPONSE. #YOUAREMYONLYHOPE
AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA Fuck that guy.
BITCHES WILL GET SO UPSET. SO TERRITORIAL. WAILING. CRYING. HYSTERICAL. "I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU STABBED MY MAN A LITTLE. AND MADE A FEW THREATS. THAT IS BASICALLY PAILING." THE WHOLE TIME. THE SAME AUDACIOUS SLUT WILL BE CUDDLING A DOLL OF THE MEGABRAIN THAT FORMED YOU INTO A LIVING WEAPON. TO HER CHEATING LYING WHORING HEAVING BOSOM. #SOMEPROLIFICAUTHORSICOULDMENTION #NSFW
THIS IS THE FIRST STEP. TO LEVELING UP. BECOMING STRONGER. AND MORE POWERFUL. DESTROYING YOUR ATTACHMENTS WILL BE UNPLEASANT. BUT WITH EVERY BRANCH PRUNED. YOUR PUSHER WILL HARDEN. AND EVENTUALLY SHARPEN INTO A FEARSOME WEAPON. TRY GETTING #CHEATEDON #REALLYBAD. THAT GOT THE BALL ROLLING FOR ME.
WHAT A SHAME. THAT YOUR PET VOYEUR CAN'T FEED YOU MY BUSINESS IN REAL TIME ANYMORE. I WILL MISS HIS SLIMY EYES. ALL OVER MY EVERY PRIVATE MOMENT. BUT YOU ARE THE REAL VICTIM HERE. OF COURSE. HOWEVER WILL YOU GO ON.
HELLO POT. THIS IS KETTLE. YOU'VE MET.
Far too easy. Where will it lead?
;; ;; i-i al§o hate thi§ §tupid job! ;; ;; §orry um §orry ;;
Po0r take.
Fergi\/\/e th'mistake. Human faces are hard t'read.
I could naut imagine \/\/\/\/hat this possibly means.
Ironic b'cause I think they're too gamey. B0at \/\/\/\/hat d'I kno\/\/\/\/?
https://cdn.imgchest.c0m/files/ae12a04ca5ec.png Interestin' results, I s'p0se. #nsf\/\/\/\/
St0p.
\/\/\/\/ish I ain't.
Yer so close t'legible.
\/\/\/\/h0 said it \/\/\/\/as y0u? But yer response \/\/\/\/as tellin'.
Thank ye.
Ooh, such a scathin' \/\/\/\/arnin'.
Filth.
Okay maybe some quirks are bad.
thank fuck i been holdin this in its fuckin unhealthy howw dare you address me so casually dirty grassmunchin trollop theres no aroma a girlstink i wwont wwade through delivverin you your deservved repentance youre as terrible a reprobate in as much as your trashblood is lowwdowwn on the caste ladder pheww fuck that felt cathartic
Comin' 0n't'an0ther alternati\/\/e 0f yer friends?
Watching Wicked for the first time. Jake and I are grappling in disagreement. Like this chit if you think Nessa Rose did nothing wrong. #nessarosedidnothingwrong #ifamandoesntloveyou #makeitillegaltoleaveyou
I'm free t'come back an' \/\/\/\/reck yer ne\/\/\/\/ place t0o if'n'I feel like it. 0ught t'cut yer splinternet s'y'can experience life an' stop t0uchin' yerself t'm'messages. T0o go0d at typin' one handed. #nsf\/\/\/\/
As if. Yer g0nna ha\/\/e t'beg fer that. Cigar's \/\/\/\/0rth m0re than yer \/\/\/\/hole hi\/\/e. \/\/\/\/hat remained 0f it especially.
A real troll.
Happy t'naut b'included but I d'admire th'eff0rt. H0\/\/\/\/e'er. I see y0ur type.
It got \/\/\/\/orse.
Ne'er been more terrified o' a p0st.
Fishin' Friday \/\/\/\/ent \/\/\/\/ell.
I d0 not \/\/\/\/ish t'alarm ye.
Clearin' th'air 0n somethin' imp0rtant.
flexing in the mirror vwhile i blowv up this girl's toilet. yup. i still #gotit.
I ain't elaboratin' but I'\/\/e been in such a situati0n.
Y' \/\/\/\/INDBAGGIN, NUMBER CH0KIN, LANDLUBBIN' MORAL COMPASS-- I CAN TELL FROM YER POSTS THAT SAID COMPASS JUST SPINS \/\/\/\/HERE'ER TH'CURRENT TELLS IT. I'\/\/e heard this tune b'f0re. Talk o' agency, dignity, dressed up like a semon. But y'\/\/e ne\/\/er been knee-deep in brine \/\/\/\/it' a lusus that's gone half-mad \/\/\/\/it' grief? Let alone as many times as th' Z00l0ger! Ne\/\/er heard th's0und they make \/\/\/\/hen their charge dunnae come back. It ain't phil0s0phy, it ain't yer tags. It's a painful ho\/\/\/\/l that dunnae fit in yer tidy little arguments. Askin' ain't so much in \/\/\/\/0rds as it is in acti0ns gi'en \/\/\/\/e dunnae ha' th'same c0mmunicati\/\/e style. Yer bein' HEMIST b' RESTRICTIN' the role 0' a caretaker 0nly t'th' PSI0NIC CASTS that can pr0ject th'thoughts int'0ne's mind. Th'argument y'd make there just t'satisfy yer \/\/\/\/hinin' bitcht0nes \/\/\/\/0uld b'say somethin' like "OH, \/\/\/\/HY D0N'T THEY ASK THE LUSUS BEF0RE TH0UGHT PR0JECTING \/\/\/\/ITH THEIR PSIONICS?!" I hate yer type. Y'\/\/e g0t n0 practicality t'yerself. Th'question is again, asked in acti0ns, and ans\/\/\/\/ered in to0th, cla\/\/\/\/, or silence. Th' sl0\/\/\/\/ lean 0' a great beast against y' ra'er than tearin' y' limb from limb. Naut all ans\/\/\/\/ers c0me in \/\/\/\/ords. It c0mes in trust, comes in \/\/\/\/he'er th' creatures lets ye li\/\/e t'try again. No\/\/\/\/ hear me plain, ‘cause I ain’t the man I \/\/\/\/ere \/\/\/\/hen I \/\/\/\/ore chains 0’ conquest and called it duty. I’\/\/e culled. I’\/\/e hunted. I’\/\/e d0ne the \/\/ery thing ye’re \/\/\/\/aggin’ yer finger about. That stain don’t \/\/\/\/ash 0ut, n0t e\/\/er. But it teaches ye somethin’ n0 lecture hall e\/\/er could. A lusus \/\/\/\/hat’s l0st its tr0ll ain’t just “independent.” S0metimes it star\/\/es. Sometimes it turns feral. S0metimes it takes a ne\/\/\/\/ \/\/\/\/ard, aye—and sometimes it tears thr0ugh a lo\/\/\/\/blood quarter l0okin’ for s0methin’ that smells like \/\/\/\/hat it l0st. Ye call that agency. I call that a po\/\/\/\/der keg \/\/\/\/aitin’ for a spark. S0 \/\/\/\/hat’s the choice, preacher? Lea\/\/e it be, so ye can sleep \/\/\/\/ell kno\/\/\/\/in’ ye respected its “aut0n0my,” \/\/\/\/hile it \/\/\/\/astes a\/\/\/\/ay 0r slaughters the unlucky? Or step in, risk yer hide, and try to guide it s0me\/\/\/\/here it \/\/\/\/on’t destroy itself? 0r o'ers? Yer fuckin' coddlin' attitude is EXACTLY th'type 0'shite I hated t'hear sp0uted at m'0'er an'o'er as I t0ok home 0n Earth. Th' Zo0loger dunnae CHAIN the lusii. Dunnae BREAK'EM. Dunnae e'en O\/\/\/\/N'em. 0nly \/\/\/\/atches in respect. If y'\/\/\/\/anna tear int' a tr0ll fer h0\/\/\/\/ he treats lusii, TARGET ME. Dunnae \/\/\/\/aste yer ide0l0gical filth 0n th'greatest \/\/iolet 0' Bef0rus. @affableCantor Dunnae \/\/\/\/orry, Admiral. Yer naut h0\/\/\/\/ this \/\/\/\/help describes y'.
Literally in m'name. \/\/\/\/hat d'y'do? Suck cue balls d0\/\/\/\/n yer gullet like a g00d seal?
@archi\/\/eAddict Th'0nly time I'm happy seein' yer fuckin' name on m'feed is \/\/\/\/it' all 0' this slander I'm seein'. Goin' t'c0llect err'y post an' tag ye.
HTTPS://I.IBB.CO/HXRYRXQC/BESTBOSS.JPG #MYBOSS #BESTBOSS #NONHOSTILEWORKPLACE #EMPLOYEROFCHOICE #GREATBENEFITS #LODGING #MEDICAL #DENTAL #BEHAVIORALHEALTH #REVIVALS #TELEPORTATION #APPLYNOW @SCRATCHDOCTOR
Thank y't'\/\/\/\/hoe'er donated a 'Fushigi' \/\/\/\/it' th' N0te. "0rb 0f Dexterous Pondering." I dunnae kn0\/\/\/\/ \/\/\/\/hat this is.
Y'can bring \/\/\/\/ha'e'er y'\/\/\/\/ant. Just dock fishin'.
#fishingfriday
Excellent.
Hello all, it's officially #FishingFriday once m0re.
Dunnae go fishin' at the #b0nfireparty h0t tub. #fishingfriday
Ho\/\/\/\/ am I s'p0sed teared? Go0d luck \/\/\/\/it' it, \/\/\/\/help.
0oh, scary t'ha\/\/e yer h0unds d'th'\/\/\/\/0rk. I'm in th'sea though.
Rancid.
Soundin' m0re like I ought t'g'back an' tear thr0ugh that f0rest.
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/4ec413f8c173.png Might b'inclined t'think this \/\/\/\/as a one time hatin' thin' if sh'\/\/\/\/eren't jumpin' do\/\/\/\/n m'gullt \/\/\/\/it' these n0tifications. 20' o'em. @archi\/\/eAddict D'I need t'g'back?
H0\/\/\/\/ strange that y'dunnae kn0\/\/\/\/ \/\/\/\/hat yer talkin' 'b0ut. I ain't talkin' 'bout any bronzebloods. H0\/\/\/\/ addled must yer mind be?
\/\/\/\/h0 are y'\/\/\/\/0rried I \/\/isited?
Depends 0n \/\/\/\/ho y'mean.
Tra\/\/eled acr0ss space-time t'b'th' king of caligin0us hate.
He li\/\/ed.
Feck off.
Sh'\/\/\/\/ill be.
Delete yer accoubt.
If'n'I find ye again, I'll bring th'Zool0ger. They'd L0\/\/E t'sea such a beastie beauty like yerself. An' I'll bring th'juiciest 0' \/\/\/\/hales.
I miss y't0o, girl.
A\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/, pretty beastie. @affableCant0r
I ain't 0n Alternia, girl. I \/\/\/\/0uld, o'er\/\/\/\/ise, pr0\/\/ide \/\/\/\/hate\/\/er a Snickers is. @calig\/\/lasAq\/\/ari\/\/m Yer an 0rphaner as \/\/\/\/ell, aye? Pr0\/\/ide it. I ain't there.
Hrm?
Oh an' the mad ra\/\/ings o' th'dramatic \/\/\/\/eb\/\/\/\/ea\/\/er are much better?
Speak'n't.
Ich0r ser\/\/es just as \/\/\/\/ell.
I am the kismesis. I am the hateful. I am the spiteful. I am th'\/\/ery troll th'\/\/\/\/rite thousands of romance n0\/\/els about. An' yet y'challenge m'. An' yet, y0u and yer ilk kin cannae help but t'f0rce m'hand. I am t'destr0y. I am t'despise. I am t'c0nquer. I am an 0rphaner. An' I ain't th' 0ne am0ng use \/\/\/\/h0 0ught t'b'fearin'. Keep'n'this in mind th'next time y'lilly li\/\/ered fo0ls decide that I \/\/\/\/as t'b'\/\/\/\/orth triflin' \/\/\/\/it'. I run on pitch black c0al.
Yer all actin' like y'ain't e\/\/er heard 0' kismesii.
Fer th'sake o' argument. \/\/ery.
Before I lea\/\/e this shith0le, any one else lookin' t'start somethin'? I'\/\/e g0t time.
I dunno kno\/\/\/\/ y'but yer grin is infuriatin'.
C0ddlin'. Ain't goin' t'happen.
Still stuck 0n Beforus. Need t'coordinate m'escape. Hate this shith0le.
Nah.
Mornin' cre\/\/\/\/. On Beforus. Sad little rock.
Er... sure, lass.
Yeah.
\/\/\/\/hat? I didn't kno\/\/\/\/ that \/\/\/\/as the plan. \/\/\/\/hy? \/\/\/\/hy is that the plan? I'd understand At a hundred s\/\/\/\/eeps but 10?
I'll \/\/\/\/ring y'dry ya \/\/ermin. I didn't say or do anythin' negati\/\/e about ye.
((Slightly updated the LORE post with a small tidbit at the bottom.))
Th'eggs \/\/\/\/ere full o' candy. \/\/\/\/hoe'er did this, I'm cullin' em.
Alright. I'm naut doin' this.
Back to huntin'. Got ne\/\/\/\/ prey.
Oh she kno\/\/\/\/s.
Yer nothin'. Just a mite. She makes m' angry. Yer just a mild nuisance at best.
You \/\/\/\/ant it terrible.
Beforan Treeaboos ain't all that tough. Expected a bit more push back.
when you guy2 hate react my chiitt2 thii2 ii2 who youre hatiing http2://ii.piiniimg.com/736x/83/84/23/838423f00bb5313a37fd5db0f7b25db5.jpg
I hate her.
It's like ye \/\/\/\/ant m' there er somethin'.
Oh a \/\/oid in m'soul, huh? \/\/\/\/hen I keel o'er from th'stench o' yer hi\/\/e y'can in\/\/estigate that all ye \/\/\/\/ant.
Oh dunnae \/\/\/\/orry. The dearly belo\/\/ed Rankmaid's probably already done it t\/\/\/\/el\/\/e times o'er an' is just ITCHIN' t'post about it.
Don't y'\/\/e got a thousand dead \/\/\/\/ailin' souls to moan for?
Don't y'\/\/e got a ball t'shine?
Not yer best \/\/\/\/ork.
I ha\/\/e been reminded sickeningly o' m'youthful habits as a young bard. Once thought m'self a lo\/\/esick soft-blooded, soft-thumpered poet. More o' a monologuer, really. I ha\/\/e decided t'return t'th'craft \/\/\/\/hilst I lie in \/\/\/\/ait. Enjoy m'musings belo\/\/\/\/. "Stygian Storm" I keep no names for you. Names are for trophies. I ha\/\/e yet to decide. \/\/\/\/hether to mount your skull. Or hold it to my chest. My tides kno\/\/\/\/ you \/\/\/\/ell. You echo in the hull. You scrape against the ribs. Like a hook so deeply planted, you'\/\/e torn me through. I spit \/\/\/\/hen I think of you. Like salt on an open \/\/\/\/ound. Yet my tongue still licks. Desperate for a taste. You cut deep against my bone. No lapping of flesh could mend. \/\/\/\/ith \/\/\/\/ords and no blades. My mind is rendered into fury. You are not a beauty. You are a storm that can not kill me. You crash your lightning against my rage. I meet you \/\/\/\/ith my brutality. It is an offense to lea\/\/e me dry. Offer yourself as a challenge. Hide behind unfamiliarity. You are no challenge. You can not shatter me proper. You can not scatter me in a trench. I ha\/\/e cursed your name a dozen o\/\/er. But you are a \/\/\/\/itch, not a \/\/\/\/ench. You shackle me to the thought of you. \/\/\/\/eighing anchor in the abyss. A storm of sky a far, A le\/\/iathan in my black abyss. You \/\/\/\/ill feel my breath. Once again against yours. By blade, by crook, and by hook. I \/\/\/\/ill drag you to the shores. No beast is to mighty. No tempest is too loud. I dream of your ruin e\/\/ery night. Sheep of Storm's Cloud. Your throat in my grip. Your blood on my deck. Your eyes \/\/\/\/ill finally understand. \/\/\/\/hat you'\/\/e made of me. And yet. There is a moment, Just before your end. I hesitated, a flicker, a betrayal. I \/\/\/\/onder ho\/\/\/\/ your \/\/oice \/\/\/\/ould sound. Speaking my name, Not as an enemy, Something \/\/\/\/orse. Something Chosen. I'd \/\/\/\/ake of these dreams. Curious, car\/\/ing into the mast. I dri\/\/e my cre\/\/\/\/ harder. Though the beasts I hunt are \/\/ast. They do not remind me of you. Your \/\/\/\/retched \/\/\/\/ords. Nor your t\/\/\/\/isted beauty. Like a malignant curse. Not lo\/\/e, ne\/\/er that. A pull to the underto\/\/\/\/. \/\/iolent, unseen, and dragging. Back to\/\/\/\/ards the thing I s\/\/\/\/ore to dro\/\/\/\/n. I \/\/\/\/ill find you again. I \/\/\/\/ill finish it. I \/\/\/\/ill, unless of course. You speak to me the same \/\/\/\/ay you'\/\/e been. There \/\/\/\/ill be no remorse.
Stop sendin' m'mail.
(Oooooh) And wwho am I to fight the need to improvvise, girl (Uh) You make me a believverrrr (In hate at first sight, girl) - Posted from my Unreal Heiress Tiaratop FLARP VvR Headset -
(Giiiirl) If you'vve been lookin for me you should'vve checked the Vvalley of the Shadoww of Death, girl (Uh) - Posted from my Unreal Heiress Tiaratop FLARP VvR Headset -
Ignore m'apparent frustration an' borderline lunacy from th' night prior. \/\/\/\/e'\/\/e got a #eridan\/\/\/\/eek t'look for\/\/\/\/ard to.
Eggs are all o'er m'island. Colorfully painted. \/\/\/\/ho did this?
Y' STARTED IT BY BITIN' ME! I GOT RAM MARKS ALL ON M'NECK! I dunnae blade Beforus fer me misery. I BLAME ME. Y'dunnae kno\/\/\/\/ me. Y'hate m'outright. I almost had a great admiration fer ye! Because I'm th'touchy feely type. No one, an' I mean, NO ONE from m'generation is \/\/\/\/illin' or able t' let themsel\/\/es feel out \/\/\/\/it' their thumper 'cept fer ole Dualscar. Y'\/\/\/\/ant to argue else\/\/\/\/here? M'ang is MINDFANG y'dolt. The Marquise. Th'best an' \/\/\/\/orst thing that's e\/\/er happened to Alternia. MY MARTYR? LASS, I \/\/\/\/AS IN THE SEA! I didn't learn about a 're\/\/olution' until after I \/\/\/\/as culled an' brought back. Yer gettin' m'fins all flared out an' shite. I dunnae \/\/\/\/ANT t'be a CRUEL and SADISTIC \/\/ILE OLE TROLL. I just \/\/\/\/ant t'fish. I \/\/\/\/ent t'that game thinkin' it'd be fun. But instead, I had t'b'\/\/\/\/itness t'that. An' y'mostly dunnae seem t'remember. But I'\/\/e got the fuckin' rust dulled teeth marks all on m'body an' yer pathetic, fuckin' \/\/\/\/aste o' space'n'time puppet man breathin' do\/\/\/\/n m'neck. Fuck right off. I'll be amicable \/\/\/\/it' ye another time.
D'ye e'en kno\/\/\/\/ \/\/\/\/hat it is t'ha\/\/e passion? I had passion, all m'life. I had it in m'death. I li\/\/ed thanklessly e\/\/ery single night an' day fer hundreds of s\/\/\/\/eeps protectin' e\/\/ery little life on Alternia from an ancient sea behemoth set to cull us all. In fact, \/\/\/\/hen I \/\/\/\/as murdered, runnin' from th'troll I \/\/\/\/as second most passionate about, it \/\/\/\/as th'only reason Alternia fell! I cull fer those \/\/\/\/ho \/\/\/\/ere important fer me. I sacrificed m'body, m'mind, an m'romances fer the Empire, fer M'ang, e'en fer the fuckin' clo\/\/\/\/n that culled me. Y'd'not come from a planet CAPABLE o' passion. Passion ain't \/\/\/\/aterin' yer fuckin' daisies or ha\/\/in' erotic times \/\/\/\/it' yer employer. It's an endless dedication an' sacrifice t'\/\/\/\/hat is important. I ain't an Orphaner anymore. But I'll certainly slaughter y'like a lusus if I gotta.
Alright. Beforans, 'cept fer @affableCantor are generally on th'shit list. I dunnae e'en \/\/\/\/ant t'think about the granularity o' that statement.
Oh but I remember. I remember pretty \/\/\/\/ell. I fuckin' hate yer guts too. I am sick o' ye. Yer al\/\/\/\/ays actin' like some sheepish little thin'. But yer no better than th'rest o'us. An' yer far \/\/\/\/orse in far more \/\/\/\/ays than I could e'er be. Y'dunnae e'en kno\/\/\/\/ \/\/\/\/hat it means t'engage in this filth y'right except as an obser\/\/er. Y'\/\/e got none o' th'makin's o' a real author. I \/\/\/\/as an author. I \/\/\/\/as a bard. M'ang LIKED \/\/\/\/hen I \/\/\/\/as. Yer just, just, abusin' th' narrati\/\/e \/\/eil of fiction t'sho\/\/\/\/ yer depra\/\/ity and it eats like an ichor at all o' us.
Or else \/\/\/\/hat? Goin' t'send th'big bad cue ball after m'? Do \/\/\/\/hatchye \/\/\/\/ant. I ain't told none 'bout \/\/\/\/hat y'said.
O' course naut. Ho\/\/\/\/ foolish o' m'think that th'troll \/\/\/\/ho spilt her metaphorical guts-- Ne'er mind ye. Fine. I'll drop it.
Somethin' th' Peixes said. Rumors bein' spilt t'her. Only a fe\/\/\/\/ of th'participants are from yer planet. I doubt the faux heiress \/\/\/\/ould. Then, o'course. There's @beforianTimes \/\/\/\/ho is next on this rumor choppin' block.
not sexual
READ ALL ABOUT IT — [ I haven't done anything devotchka! ]
There will be NO hornyposts today in observance of the holiday.
<ant be a failgirl if youre a grown ass woman
I am receiving conflicting reports on my ability to YaoiPost today. It has been advised I wait until Thursday to make any comments. Hopefully these feelings will dissipate before then. Thank you all for understanding.
see i really just think coolscar insists upon themself thats the problem
---------------------------------------- HTTPS://FILE.GARDEN/XQ7XZPQD4WQPYSB0/DR0NE.PNG ----------------------------------------
---------------------------------------- VI0LATI0N HAS BEEN DETECTED CULL PR0T0C0L ACTIVATI0N [================================== 100%] CULLING IN PR0GRESS [=============================> 80%] ----------------------------------------
// if you go onto your profile you can edit the chit from there
wwait wwhen did this become about sex
well. guess i'm yellow now.
\) [I hate boys…]
S9rry, that caught me s9 9ffguard I was rendered m9mentarily speechless. What I meant t9 say was a6s9lutely n9t. I d9n't kn9w wh9 has put this idea int9 y9ur thinkpan 9r why, 6ut if y9u are t9 stay as far away fr9m me and any tu6s 9f lu6e as humanly 9r tr9lly p9ssi6le.
I am a mo+derato+r. This is a threat.
Okay lo23r2, thi2 tim3 for r3al. In c3l3bration of th3 23arch f3atur3 I think it2 tim3 Lik3, Hat3, M3diat3, or Pity and ill rat3 your a22 You wont cau23 your3 too 2car3d
<] I THINK PEANUT NEEDS TO BE VERIFIED, I NEED TO KNOW IM COMMUNING WITH THE REAL THING[>
nineteen-forty-poo
NO.
w eat2? http2://fiile2.catbox.moe/1nek20.webp
all this stress makes me need to visit big byron bro #nsfw
im putting 2gether an anti-anime taskforce
Speciesism on main. Not very woke of you.
There are old men messaging me.
jesus christ if you guys cant behave im changing my profile picture.
Bait tim3 Lik3 thi2 po2t, hat3 thi2 po2t, pity thi2 po2t or m3diat3 thi2 po2t and you'll 2how up in my notification2 b3ll That2 it, do it
https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ Say, have you checked out my latest song?