@carbolicGalvanologist — #substance
DAY THREE THAT I'VE BEEN #KARKNAPPED. CURRENTLY FLAT ON MY BACK IN THE MIDDLE OF THIS LATE OTTOTROLL EMPIRE OPIUM DEN. NOW *THIS* IS WHAT I CALL A #SUBSTANCE. WORK HARD, PLAY HARD, I GUESS.
#ABCC #WATCHPARTY #SUBSTANCE NIGHT. GET IN. REST OF THE INFO'S HERE. NOT REPEATING MYSELF AGAIN. JUST FUCKING READ. [ https://hyperbeam.com/i/cZxBRjnH ]
ATTENTION, WORTHLESS CHITTRLINGS. THIS IS YOUR RESIDENT CINEMA SNOB, SPEAKING. IT IS THAT TIME, ONCE AGAIN. TIME TO GET FUCKING CRAZY WITH IT. #ABCC #WATCHPARTY TOLIGHT AT 7 PM PST. WE'RE WATCHING "THE IMAGINARIUM OF DOCTOR PARNASSUS (2009)" AGAIN, AND THIS TIME, WE'RE DOING IT HARD. WE'RE DOING IT LOUD. WE'RE DOING IT FUCKING LIVE. WE'RE DOING IT WITH (OPTIONAL, OPTIONAL, EXTREMELY FUCKING OPTIONAL) SUBSTANCES AT #SUBSTANCE NIGHT. BRING YOUR OWN BULLSHIT (BYOB), AS USUAL. IF YOU HAVEN'T RESERVED YOUR TICKET AT THE ABCC MIDDLE PRONGSTUBS S-LIST BOX OFFICE, DO SO NOW OR BE SHUNTED FROM MY CINEM...Read more
AT LONG LAST, IT'S ALMOST TIME. IT'S THE END OF THE WIPE. YOU'VE FOUGHT. YOU'VE WEPT. YOU'VE RUN YOUR BLOODY STRUTPODS RAGGED AND CROSSED THAT FUCKING FINISH LINE WITH NOTHING IN THE TANK. SO EVERYBODY GET OUT OF YOUR FUCKING WAY, BECAUSE YOU'VE EARNED THIS. IT'S #SUBSTANCE NIGHT AT #ABCC. (OPTIONAL. OPTIONAL. OPTIONAL. CAN'T STATE THIS ENOUGH. OPTIONAL. SIT THIS ONE OUT IF YOU'RE UNCOMFORTABLE OR FOREVER HOLD YOUR PEACE.) IF YOU HAVEN'T CAUGHT ONE OF THE *THREE* (YES, THREE. HOLY FUCKING SHIT, WE ARE *SO* FUCKING BACK) #WATCHPARTY SHOWINGS HOSTED BY MYSELF OR @carcinoGeneticist#2443 THIS WIPE, T...Read more
YOU THOUGHT ME GONE. YOU THOUGHT I WAS DEAD SILENT. GROUND INTO MULCH UNDER THE HEEL OF MY RESPONSIBILITIES TO THE TIME ASSHOLE MAFIA. THAT I HAD LEFT MY THRONE, THE ONE I CARVED OUT OF THE RAW, PRIMORDIAL SHITSLUDGE OF THIS UNCULTURED WEBSITE WITH MY TEETH, CLAWS, AND GODTIER TASTE IN ROMANTIC CINEMA, TO COLLECT DUST, COBWEBS, WINGBEAST SHIT, AND LIMESCALE. WELL GUESS WHAT, ASSHOLES. YOU THOUGHT WRONG. IT'S BACK. IT'S FUCKING BACK. AND THIS TIME, IT'S HERE TO STAY. STARTING 7/8, THE ADORABLOODTHIRSTY CINEMASSACRE CLUB IS BACK. THE BEST ROMANCES, ROMANCE-ADJACENT FLICKS, AND BARELY JU...Read more
ATTENTION, WHOEVER GIVES A FUCK. THIS IS THE CHALKBOX SPEAKING. TONIGHT, I STRUCK A DECISIVE BLOW AGAINST THE SISYPHEAN QUANTUM MESS STATE THE FELT MANSION IS PERPETUALLY KEPT IN BY ALL THE SNEEZING, DROOLING, ASS-BLASTING FROGS, CARAPICIANS, CLOWNS, PRONG PUPPETS, AND MARA. ALL IT COST ME WAS THE MAJORITY OF MY FUCKING NIGHT. AND I'M PISSED ABOUT IT. QUITE FUCKING LITERALLY. IT'S GOING TO BE A #SUBSTANCE KIND OF NIGHT FOR KARKAT VANTAS. GET THE *HELL* OUT OF MY WAY IF YOU WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT.
FUCK IT. I'M PISSED AND HAVING A SHITTY NIGHT. BECAUSE IT'S THE *SAME* FUCKING NIGHT OVER AND OVER. AND THIS TIME LOOP IS GETTING ON MY NERVES. I NEED TO TIE SOMEONE UP. OR I NEED MORE CIGARETTES.
OH MY GOD. THERE ARE SIX BOTTLES OF TROLLQUILA IN HERE WITH ME. WAIT. DID I. NO. NOT AGAIN. #SUBSTANCE
TGA YUORSELF. HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/B73558119F0E.WEBP #SUBSTANCE
ATTENTION, WORTHLESS CHITTRLINGS. THIS IS YOUR TROLL KINGDOM CO-LEADER SPEAKING. A LEADER WHO HAS, UPON OPENING MY SOPORIFIC, ROTSALT-ENCRUSTED GANDERBULBS, COME TO THE REALIZATION THAT LAST LIGHT, WHILE UNDER THE EFFECTS OF THE #SUBSTANCE, I MADE SOME. CHITS. IT IS MY BELIEF THAT AFTER SWEEPS OF UNWANTED EXPOSURE, FELLOW TROLL KINGDOM CO-LEADER DAVE STRIDER HAS LEFT A DERANGED THOUGHTFORM IN MY THINKPAN. IT LIVES DEEP IN MY FULMINATING PSYCHE. TRAPPED IN A PRISON BENEATH A THOUSAND ATMOSPHERES' PRESSURE OF DENSE, POSTURE POLE-SNAPPING SELF-LOATHING. AND AFTER THE. EVENT. THAT OCCURRED. I INTEND ...Read more
ON A TWIN LUNAR PHASIC SWOOP, I'LL FUCK *ANYTHING.* I'M A STREET CREATURE. I'M SMOKING ON THE MOST HIVESHIT, GRUBFESTERING, GUTHOSE-DISEMBOWLING, CROTCH-BLISTERING *UNFORTUNATE* SHIT YOU'VE EVER HAD THE DISPLEASURE OF JAWING ON. THIS EDIBLE HAS A *PULSE.* #NSFW #SUBSTANCE
I WENT GRIMDARK A LONG TIME AGO. PUSSY BOY WANTED CULLBEEF WITH ME OVER GALACTIC ACQUISITION. CALLED HIS MATESPRIT OVER AND PUT TEN IMPERIAL METRIC LENGTH UNITS ON HER FOREHEAD LIKE THE GENETIC DESCENT OF "TROLL JESUS." THE #SUBSTANCE WILL HAVE YOU IN PURGATORY, SCREAMING FOR ETERNITY. YOU WILL RELIVE EVERY KEY MISTAKE YOU'VE EVER MADE IN YOUR LIFE. OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN. #NSFW
#SUBSTANCE GOT ME FEELING LIKE EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE ALRIGHT.
I HAVE MADE MY PEACE WITH IT. BY THE TREACHERY OF THESE BRANCH-SWINGING, SIMIAN-MORPHOLOGICAL, POCKMARKED ALIEN *HUMANIMALS* WHO WERE IN MY HIVE EARLIER TODAY, I HAVE INGESTED AN AMOUNT OF #SUBSTANCE THAT COULD UNIRONICALLY MAKE ME ONE WITH THE FUCKING UNIVERSE. I MAY DO SOMETHING. EMBARRASSING. AS EVERY TROLL, REGARDLESS OF CASTE OR CREED, HAS THE CAPACITY TO DO. I DO NOT EXPECT YOUR FORGIVENESS. WHAT I DEMAND IS YOUR FOREWARNING. OOOOOOOOUHHHHH, FUCK. #SUBSTANCE #NOWAITALREADYSAIDTHAT #DEFINITELY #NSFW #THERE IS NO RULING THAT OUT FOR SURE #UH #EXPONENTIALLYMOREGRANDIOSETHOUGHTSONTH...Read more
OKAY. THE #SUBSTANCE CLOUD IS BEGINNING TO DISSIPATE. I CAN SEE FURNITURE BEFORE I STUMBLE INTO IT AND BREAK MY POOR, FUMBLING PRONGS AGAIN. THIS IS NO LONGER AN ACTIVE BIOHAZARD SCENE. I AM READY TO REMOVE THE PERSONAL FILTRATION DEVICE SPONSORED BY... SIGH. @GUTSYGUMSHOE, CEO OF #CROCKERCORP. USE CODE #KARKALICIOUS AT CHECKOUT FOR 5% OFF ON YOUR NEXT MOBILE RESUSCITATION ORDER. AND KISS MY GRAY, PERKY, AEROSOLIZED TROPICAL FRUIT MIXED WITH ODOROUS SPRAYBEAST-SCENTED ASS. I FEEL LIKE SOME DISORIENTED, BESOTTED HARPFLAYER OUT OF AN OLD-WORLD MYTH. HAVING STUMBLED AIMLESSLY WITHOUT HOPE OR EQUILIBRIUM, ...Read more
I HAVE SEEN CLEARER SKIES IN INTERSTELLAR FOOTAGE OF GAS GIANTS. *CREMATORIUMS* AREN'T THIS SWELTERING TO BREATHE IN. THERE IS MORE #SUBSTANCE IN THIS HIVE THAN THERE IS OXYGEN OR RESTRAINT. I WOULD SPRINT OUTSIDE AND GASP FOR AIR LIKE A DYING SEADWELLER, BUT I'M ALMOST POSITIVE THAT THE CONTACT HIGH HAS RENDERED ME ALL BUT RIVEN FROM ALL SENSORY CONNECTION TO MY SMOKED, WELL-PRESERVED CARCASS. I CAN'T RISK BEING SEEN LIKE THIS IN PUBLIC. I'M GOING TO SEE IF I CAN MAKE A GAS MASK OUT OF A PLASTIC BAG OR DIE TRYING.
#UNETHICALSEPULCHERMASTERADVICE. I FOUND A WAY TO MAKE THE S&S SESSION AS ENTERTAINING AS IT NEEDED TO BE, DESPITE BEING WOEFULLY UNDERPREPARED AND UNDERSLEPT. BUT AT WHAT COST. I HAD A STASH OF PSYCHOACTIVE EARTH #SUBSTANCE TREATS LEFT OVER FROM THE LAST TIME DAVE SMUGGLED THEM INTO THE SANCTITY OF MY HIVE. I. I OFFERED THEM TO THE GROUP, TO "ENCOURAGE A SOCIALLY LUBRICATED AND VISCERALLY CHUMMED GAMING ENVIRONMENT," AND EVERYONE ACCEPTED WITHOUT QUESTION. I *THINK* THEY LIKED IT, BUT I FEEL LIKE I. DON'T DESERVE ANY PRAISE FOR CONCEIVING THIS SOLUTION. AND I'M STILL. GUH. FUCKED UP. I H...Read more