♣ mediated by @scratchDoctor
alright. wvriska vwon. sorry damz. i wvas rooting for you, i really wvas. novw. her imperious condescension vwersus rose lalonde. iwve got something real special for you all. took some bartering, some vwheeling and dealing, thats vwhy it took me a sec to get back to this. lemme start wvith the rose propaganda. beautiful blonde, knowvs howv to banter, perfect bod, perfect face, can do some spooky eldritch stuff if thats vwhat youre into. shes incredible. i dont wvanna undersell her here. but... i got a vwintage from my man @caligulaascendit. this is *art*. nowv, to share the scan, he said he vwanted to do the propaganda for her, so here you go. #nsfwv. #nsfc too, but not the c youre thinking of. "its ya boy eridan ampora here vwith a guest rewvievw on alternias biggest caked up baddie our leadin broad in the beam for #cronusbabeoff hovwre all likin my vwintage hic edition penthouse by the wvay pretty groowvy huh cost me a pretty caegar but it wvas totally wvorth it an yknowv its the real deal too cause its got her signature shade a coral pink semi gloss #2 stamped across the covwer wvhen im feelin advwenturous i take my condy penthivwe out a her plastic slip an ewver so gently stroke her lipstick mark vwith a quivwerin finger wvith my other flipper placed firmly against my crotch anyvway im afraid the competition has been crushed by the empresss unholy cake grinder the rest a you booty impaired ladies can go hivwe novw" yeah. yowvza. #cwv-cakesitting. <3 or <> for condy. <3< or c3< for rosie.
calling it. i could let it keep on keeping on, but i think wved all be happier (besides meenah) if meenahs the one wvho movwes on this round. trust me. next up. wvell, vwe already savw wvhy you should vwote for either candidate. jane crocker up against the handmaid. #cronusbabeoff! bouncy, bodacious, a real boss bitch, janey crocker herself! the maid wvith the most, shes got plenty of junk in her trunk, and the business acumen to buy you out if you hawve anything bad to say about it. dont think just because shes a life player shes a healslut. she, uhh... she scares me. and then wvevwe got the handmaid, alternias vwhore-er, the shame of beforus, servwant of time and friend o mine! wvhat a wvoman! you wvant some timestop? shes got you cowvered. time clones? easy. you vwanna get covwered? shes got you covwered. and the #contraptions. oh the contraptions. and the #doohickeys. phewv. she, uhh... she scares me. lifemaid wvs handmaid, let the wvoting begin! #nsfwv <3 or <> for janey <3< or c3< for handy
im calling it, i dont really care. condy wvins, lamplady doesnt movwe on. sorry toots, youre hot and all, but i wvant the *real* stars competing here. speaking of... god damn. this one hurts. the final match of round 2 in the #cronusbabeoff is... rose lalonde vws kanaya maryam. this ones gotta sting. most of the rosies and kannys iwve seen around this place are divworced, dunno if ivwe seen ewven one happy couple, but this has still gotta be a vweird one. i wvas a lil spoiled for choice for propaganda, so i wvent a lil softer on this one. still #nsfwv, of course. <3 or <> for kanaya <3< or c3< for rose
wvell its confirmed: the crockercorp pr machine hates rustbloods. someone go cancel janey or something. there vwas a good turn out for aradia, including by the wveird vwhite guy himself, but it just vwasnt enough. jane movwes on! sorry rae rae. up next, the handmaid, the demoness, the scariest bitch on alternia, up against the heiress, the wvitch, the svweetest lil thing on alternia, feferi peixes! this propaganda is also #nsfwv for real. wvote belovw, vwhos hot, wvhos not? #cronusbabeoff <3 or <> for feferi <3< or c3< for the handmaid
hey what’s up guys here like i literally am am making my first like post on apparently the honestly fucking canserous like website, like looks like like u like fuckers will honestly finally literally get the honestly premium content u deserve. make sure literally to hit that bell and follow for like more.
BE ME. CALIBORN. THE ONE WHO IS WRITING THIS. NOT THE ONE WHO IS BEING WRITTEN ABOuT. THAT DISTINCTION IS IMPORTANT. BECAuSE I AM REAL. AND CALLIE BHORNE IS FICTIONAL. BuT ALSO. IN A DEEPER SENSE. HE IS REALER THAN YOu. BECAuSE I SAID SO. AND I AM REAL AS IT GETS. DISBELIEF. SuSPENDED. CALLIE BHORNE. CALI B. REAL. THIS IS NOW NOT ABOuT ME. EXCEPT IT IS PRIMARILY ABOuT ME. IN A VICARIOuS SENSE. BuT SECONDARILY. IT IS ABOuT CALLIE BHORNE. MY CHARACTER. THAT I HAVE MADE. FOR THIS EPIC GODDAMN SAGA. CALLED. #LAIRSANDLuSII. WHICH SOuNDS LIKE A DOCTOR SEuSS ASS NuRSERY RHYME. BuT APPARENTLY. IF ITS HOST IS TO BE BELIEVED. IS A HORROR ROLEPLAY SCENARIO. WHICH IS FuNNY. BECAuSE THE ONLY HORROR HERE IS HOW POWERFuL I AM ABOuT TO MAKE THIS MOTHERFuCKER BEFORE YOuR GOBSMACKED GODDAMN GANDERBuLBS. SQuEAKY HANDS SCRuBBING THEM SEE WORTHY AGAIN. A RECAP. INTERMISSION. BEFORE WE BEGIN. LET ME TELL YOu ABOuT CALLIE BHORNE. HE IS A LIME BLOOD. WHICH IS RARE. AND ALSO EXTINCT. EXCEPT FOR HIM. BECAuSE HE KILLED EVERYONE WHO TRIED TO MAKE HIM EXTINCT. WHICH KEPT HIM THE SOLE ENDLING SuRVIVOR OF THE SLAuGHTER. AFTER uSING HIS SPECIAL ABILITY. EMPEROR LORDLING TIME. WHICH LETS HIM CHANNEL HIS DEAD SISTER. CALLIE OHPEEE. WHO HE DEVOuRED AND SCRAMBLED. STRAIGHT OuT THE GATE. POST EGG HATCH. SIPHONING HER POWER. TO INCREASE HIS OWN. EFFICACY. WHICH IS A WORD I uSED BECAuSE IT SOuNDS IMPORTANT. HE IS A PALADIN. OATH OF CONQuEST. WHICH IS LIKE AN ORDINARY PALADIN. BuT INSTEAD OF HEALING AND PROTECTING. HE CONQuERS AND DESTROYS. BECAuSE PROTECTION IS FOR COWARDS. AND HEALING IS FOR THE WEAK AND NEEDY LITTLE SNIVELING FuCKSTuPID COWARDS. FuRTHERMORE. WEAKNESS IS A DISEASE THAT MuST BE STEPPED ON. CRuSHED. AND THEN QuARANTINED TO THE AFTERLIFE. WHERE IT WILL NEVER RETuRN FROM. HE IS CuRRENTLY SITTING. ON THE ALABSTER CAIRO CASINO PHAROAH SARSWAPAGuS THRONE. WHICH IS A SACRED LIME BLOOD ARTIFACT. THAT ALLOWS THEM TO COMMuNE WITH THEIR DEAD SISTERS. IF THEY HAVE ANY. WHICH HE DOES. BECAuSE HE KILLED HER. YOu ALL SAW. I WROTE THAT. AND YOu SAW. STuDIOuS LITTLE NOTETAKERS THAT YOu NO DOuBT ARE. YOu CAN SEE IT HERE NOW WITHOuT HAVING TO LOOK AWAY FROM MY WORDS IF YOu HAVE FORGOTTEN. AND NOW SHE IS HAuNTING HIM. WHICH IS QuITE POETIC. EXEuNT INTERMISSION. BEGIN. ACT NONE. SESSION ZERO. THE THRONE IS GLOWING. A MYSTERIOuS WIND HOWLS. THE WINDOWLESS ROOM CuRIOuSLY CRADLES THE AIR IN A SuRREPTIOuS BREEZE THAT COMES FROM SEEMINGLY FuCKING NOWHERE. THAT IS BECAuSE THE THRONE ITSELF. HAS BECOME LINKED TO A FAR AND STRANGE LAND. uNFAMILIAR ENTIRELY TO CALLIE BHORNE. HE DOES NOT KNOW IT YET. MERELY REACTS ON INFLuENCE. HIS FAuLTY PASSIVE PERCEPTION WEATHERED BY HIS YEARS AS MuSCLE FOR HIRE. HE FEELS A TWITCHY SPASM IN HIS WRIST. HIS INSTINCTS COMMAND HIM TO DRAW HIS SWORD. BuT HE REFuSES. HE KNOWS BETTER THAN TO RESORT TO WANTON AGGRESSION WITHOuT A TARGET. THE THINKPAN WILL OVERHEAT. SENDING SCORCHING THOuGHTS EVERYWHERE THAT BLINDINGLY ERASE ALL MOVEMENT uNTIL A SAFE DISTANCE IS OBSERVED FROM ALL LIVING THINGS. CALLIE BHORNE WOuLD MAKE CORPSES OF PARADISE FOR THE ELYSIuM FIELDS OF HIS OWN ISOLATION MADE PuRE AND PRISTINE ONCE AGAIN. THIS IS HIS DREADED CuRSE. TO WALK A PLANET HE WOuLD SOONER RAIZE THAN RAISE. HE CANNOT BE KNOWN TO LOVE. HE CANNOT RISK FEELING. AND HE CANNOT CHANCE A SINGLE LIVING BEING. EVER. AND YET. THERE IS THAT HOWLING. THAT WIND. THAT DAMNABLE FuCKING WIND. "TSK." CALLIE BHORNE GROWLS. ANOTHER FuCKING REPAIR NEEDED. NOBODY EVER TOLD HIM BEING A LIVING RELIC MEANT LIVING IN ONE. BYGONE ERAS HAVE A FuNNY WAY OF STICKING AROuND. CALLIE BHORNE TAKES THIS AS EVIDENCE. THAT CALLIE OHPEEE IS FuCKING WITH HIM. WHICH IS FuNNY. BECAuSE SHE PROBABLY DID NOT ACTuALLY DO THAT. BECAuSE SHE HATES HIM TO SCREW WITH HIM IN A CLEVER WAY. BECAuSE HE DEVOuRED HER. BuT THE FASTEST WAY. TO A GRIZZLED VETERAN'S HEART. IS THROuGH HIS STOMACH. A PLACE THAT CALLIE OHPEEE HAS BEEN. QuITE FATALLY. SHE LOVES HIM. EVEN IF HE WILL NOT SAY. WHICH IS WHY. uPON DISCOVERY THE THRONE ITSELF OPENS TO A TRANSPORTALIZED DIMENSION. ANOTHER WORLD. OR PLACE. OR LAND. OR BIOME. THE BLINDING LIGHT MAKES IT TRuLY DIFFICuLT TO TELL. HE REALIZES THE TRuTH. "NO FuCKING WAY." CALLIE OHPEEE HAS BLESSED THIS CRuSADE. HER FACE APPEARS FOR A BRIEF MOMENT. SHE LOOKS. STRANGE. uGLY. SHE ASSuMES ANOTHER OF HER FORMS MEANT TO TORMENT HIM. A GREEN SKuLL. STAINED WITH THE SLICK LIME BLOOD SHE WAS COATED IN WHEN HE FIRST DEVOuRED HER. HIS MOuTH WATERS. HE HAS NEVER FOuND A GRuBSAuCE SO DELECTABLE AS HIS FIRST MEAL. HE LITERALLY ATE THE EGGSHELL SHE HATCHED OuT OF. FOR ADDITIONAL NuTRIENTS. THAT SAuCE WAS SO FuCKING GOOD. ONLY NOW. AT LEAST IN APPEARANCE. THE BLOOD WAS BAD. VERY VERY BAD. LEFT TO COAGuLATE. ROT. ADHERE. AND THICKEN. LIKE A KIND OF ALMOST REPTILIAN HIDE. IF HIS HONORABLE TYRANNY WERE HIS LuSuS. WHAT WAS THIS? A HATCHMATE OVERREACH OF SOME KIND? SISTERLY SOBBING? BITCHING AND MOANING? uPON CLOSER INSPECTION. THE ANSWER BECAME MuCH CLEARER. LITTLE PINPRICK DRIPS OF RED. FRISKING ALONG HIS BODY. CALIBORN FINDS IT. A FRESHLY INFLICTED WOuND THAT WAS NOT THERE BEFORE. JuST ALONG HIS THORAX. THE uPPER CHIFFONIER. AS IF ANGLING FOR HIS BLOODPuSHER WITH EACH DARTED FINGER. HER WAY OF SAYING. THIS QuEST COuLD PROVE DEADLY. ALTHOuGH. CALLIE BHORNE WAS uNSuRE. EVEN CALIBORN WAS LIKE. GIRL WHAT THE FuCK IS YOu ON. THERE COuLD BE NO CERTAINTIES WHEN DEALING WITH HER. "HEH. GuESS MY HATCHMATE IS STILL LOOKING OuT FOR ME AFTER ALL THESE SWEEPS. SOME LOVE. HuH? SHE'S GOT A FuNNY WAY OF SHOWING IT." AND THEN. uNFuRLED. IS MY BLADE. READY TO BE BuRIED IN THE NECKS OF DuMBFuCKS. LOCATION: THE TRIBuNAL HALL OF SuPREME CAVORT. STOMPING GROuNDS OF HIS HONORABLE TYRANNY. EATING GROuNDS ALSO. THIS IS WHERE CALLIE BHORNE LIVES. BECAuSE HE IS SPECIAL. AND RAISED BY A BELOATHED BY ALL TYRANT. THE ROOM HAS COuNTLESS WEATHERED BONES SHAVED DOWN SO AS TO RESEMBLE MARBLE COLuMNS. BuT THEY ARE THICK. LIKE CEDAR WOOD TRuNKS. AND SPLINTERED. SO AS TO SuGGEST THE BEATING OF ANGRY FISTS. CLAWED AND CHEWED. SO AS TO SuGGEST THE CLuTCHING OF VERY DESPERATE HANDS DRAGGED OFF INTO OPEN MOuTH. AND BLOOD. SO MuCH BLOOD. THE THRONE ITSELF. HOWEVER. IS CLEAN. AN EXHIBIT ALMOST. EVIDENCE. OF TIME'S TRAGIC PASSING. A RELIC OF THE LIMES. LIKE MANY OF THE CONFISCATED LEGENDARY ITEMS HERE. THOuGH CALLIE BHORNE FANCIES HIMSELF SOMETHING OF A TROLL WITH AN EYE FOR ANTIQuES SPORTING SEASONED HISTORY BEHIND THEM. THESE ITEMS ARE ONLY ACQuIRED WHEN SOMEONE TRIES TO SMuGGLE OR SELL THE ILLICIT CONTRABAND. IN FACT. WERE IT NOT FOR HIS LuSuS. AND SLAPDASH CHARM. CALLIE WOuLD CERTAINLY BE KILLED FOR HIS EXTENSIVE BEWEARABLE WARES ALONE. OWNING THESE IS ILLEGAL. BuT CONFISCATING THEM. IS JuST ANOTHER TuESDAY. OR WHATEVER THE TROLL EQuIVALENT OF A TuESDAY IS. PROBABLY CHEWSDAY. IT IS JuST ANOTHER CHEWSDAY. INTERRuPTION: HE WAS COMMuNING. WITH HIS DEAD SISTER. OR AT LEAST TRYING TO. HIS HATCHMATE IS OFT uNRELIABLE. WHICH IS A SPECIAL KIND OF ESPECIALLY HIGH uNRELIABILITY. BuT THEN. THE SESSION. OR WHATEVER EXCITING COSMIC BuLLSHIT IS RuNNING THIS GAME. DECIDED TO INTERRuPT. WITH A PORTAL. OR AN APERTuRE. OR WHATEVER WHITE GLOWING BuLLSHIT YOu PEOPLE ARE uSING. I WANT TO KEEP MY WHITENESS CONSISTENT. IF WE ARE ALL DOING A WHITE THING. I WANT TO DO THE SAME WHITE THING. OTHERWISE I WILL FEEL LEFT OuT. AND THAT WOuLD BE REALLY SHITTY OF YOu GuYS. SO MAKE MY WHITE THING BE THE SAME AS YOuR WHITE THING. HOW THE SuMMONS APPEARS: THROuGH THE THRONE. OBVIOuSLY. THE GLOWING INTENSIFIES. AND INSTEAD OF JuST SHOWING CALLIE OHPEEE. WHICH IS WHAT IT uSuALLY SHOWS. IN MIDDLING LITTLE APPARITION LIKE OuTLINES. AND DEAD SISTER MONTAGE. AND LIMITLESS PATIENCE FOR ME. HER HATCHMATE. AND MY SILLY ANTICS. IT SHOWS SOMETHING ELSE. A LAIR. OR WHATEVER. MAKE IT SOMETHING APPROPRIATE. ACTuALLY. COuLD IT BE. LIKE. A THRONE ROOM. BuT BIGGER. AND WITH MORE BODIES. OR A FIELD OF CONQuERED ENEMIES. OR A CASINO. WHERE EVERYONE IS LOSING. EXCEPT HIM. CALLIE NEVER LOSES. EH. DOC. SCRATCH THAT. CALLIE NEVER HAS LOST. BECAuSE HE REFuSES TO GIVE uP. HE ALWAYS TRIES. AND RETRIES. EVEN IN THE FACE OF ABSOLuTE SuREFIRE DEFEAT. HE WRENCHES VICTORY FROM HIS OWN JAWS. THAT IS WHAT I MEANT TO SAY OF HIM. YES. SO DECIDE. A VISION THAT CALLS FOR HIM. PERHAPS. SOMEONE IN NEED? YES. THAT WOuLD BE GENIuS. CALLIE IS EXTRAORDINARILY NEEDABLE. AND WILLING TO MAKE HIS TROLLIAN CLAWS. AN OuTSTRETCHED SORT. WHAT YOu GLIMPSE: SOMETHING THAT REPRESENTS POWER. AND DOMINATION. AND VICTORY. BuT ALSO. SECRETLY. SOMETHING THAT REPRESENTS HIS SISTER. IN SOME ROuNDABOuT WAY. THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT FOR HIS CHARACTERIZATION. HOW YOuR LuSuS OR SuRROuNDINGS REACT: HIS LuSuS HOWLS WITH EARSPLITTING INTENSITY. HIS HONORABLE TYRANNY. HuGE GROSS MONSTER. BLACK BLOOD. BRAINLESS BEASTIE. HE LETS OuT A ROAR. OR SOMETHING EQuALLY TERRIBLE. AND IT DOES NOT REACT WITH FEAR. BECAuSE IT DOES NOT FEEL FEAR. IT REACTS WITH RECOGNITION. LIKE. "OH. MY SON. CALLIE BHORNE. HAS BEEN SuMMONED FOR ANOTHER ADVENTuRE. HOW REGuLAR. AND ORDINARY. BE SuRE TO KILL AND PARTIALLY CANNIBALIZE PLENTY OF PEOPLE. MY SWEET. CHERuBICALLY CHARMING BOY." AND CALLIE BRuSHES HIS THuMB. AGAINST HIS VERY EXISTANT NOSE. AND GOES. "TSK. SHuT uP FATHER. I AM GROWN NOW. I AM NOT SOME HELPLESS LITTLE PuPA ANYMORE." AND HE GROWLS. SOMBERLY. "I KNOW. BuT WHEN I LOOK uPON MY SON. MY HERO. MY LITTLE LEGISLACERITO. I DO NOT SEE YOu AS YOu ARE. I SEE YOu. AS WHAT YOu HAVE BECOME. FROM WHAT YOu WERE. A WEIGHTED AVERAGE. SuNDERED BY MY SINKING HEART." AND HE GOES. "HMP. WHATEVER DAD. LOVEYOuTOO." AND HIS DAD SCREECHES LOuDLY. "MY SON!!!" OR MAYBE IT DOES NOT SAY ANYTHING. AND JuST. GROWLS. APPROVINGLY. WHATEVER WOuLD BE COOLER. WHAT PART OF YOu ANSWERS FIRST: NOT FEAR. HE DOES NOT FEEL FEAR. JuST LIKE HIS FATHER. HE FEELS ANTICIPATION. THE PART THAT WANTS TO CONQuER. THE PART THAT WANTS TO DEVOuR. THE PART THAT LOOKS AT A MYSTERIOuS PORTAL AND THINKS. "YES. MORE uNSETTLED SCORES. AND WRONGS TO RIGHT." OR POSSIBLY. THE PART THAT HEARS HIS SISTER. WHISPERING. FROM THE THRONE. SAYING. "DONT GO. YOu IDIOT. ITS A TRAP. A DEADLY FuCKING TRAP." BuT HE IGNORES HER. BECAuSE HE IS THE PALADIN. NOT THE PALADIN'T. YOuR FINAL ACTION: CALLIE. DOES NOT. uNDER ANY CIRCuMSTANCES. SHOW HESITATION. HESITATION IS FOR PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT CALLIE BHORNE. AND THEREFORE. NOT ME. BECAuSE I MADE HIM. AND I AM ALSO NEVER HESITANT. EXCEPT WHEN I AM. WHICH IS NEVER. ALTHOuGH. THERE WAS THAT ONE TIME. BuT I WAS MERELY. READYING AN ATTACK. AN ASSBLAST ATTACK THAT PROVED FATAL. FOR MY ENEMIES. SO IT IS LESS A HESITATION. AND MORE A READYING POSE. WHICH IS WHAT HE STRIKES. BEFORE SAYING SOMETHING REALLY FuCKING COOL. LIKE. "...WELL WELL WELL. IS THIS THE PART. WHERE I TOSS IN A QuARTER AND MAKE A WISH?" OR. "THE THRONE BECKONS. QuIT YOuR BITCHING. I'M LITERALLY COMING RIGHT NOW." OR. "CALLIE OHPEEE. WATCH OVER FATHER FOR ME WHILE I AM GONE. OKAY?" OR JuST. "...CONQuEST CALLS." WHATEVER HE SAYS. PROBABLY ALL OF THESE THINGS. HE IS NOT NICE. HE IS GRIZZLED AND EDGY. HE ATE HIS SISTER AND REGRETS NOTHING EXCEPT THAT HE COuLD NOT EAT HER TWICE. HE IS A MONSTER. AND HE IS MY FAVORITE CHARACTER. BECAuSE HE IS THE ONLY ONE WHO uNDERSTANDS ME.
CHITTR HANDLE: @atomizedHobbyist YOUR MESSAGE: >--D=Why=do=you=type=in=that=disgusting=colour=haha=:?//< LOOKING FOR WORK?: YES. AND YOU'RE A HOT RUSTIE. HEY. @scratchDoctor. WE FINALLY GOT ONE. DO YOU WANT ME CARNALLY: >--D=You=are=very=pretty=but=I=would=not=lust=after=a=lady=of=your=caliber=assuming=you=do=not=indulge=in=hemo=typing=and=are=a=rustblood=yourself=haha=:)//< THE RUMORS ARE TRUE. I'M THE LOWLIEST. FILTHIEST. LUSTIEST RUSTIE. AT THE BOTTOM OF THE SCUMBLOOD GUTTER. THEY JUST MAKE ME TYPE LIKE THIS FOR WORK. TO MATCH THE FACT THAT EVERYTHING IN THIS DAYMAREHIVE IS GREEN. AND REALLY DRIVE HOME THE POINT. THAT I AM OWNED. PAST PRESENT AND FUTURE. BODY AND SOUL. #APPLYNOW.
CHITTR HANDLE: typethisIfyoustankbitch SIGH. HELLO MEENAH. YOUR MESSAGE: when are you gonna do everyone a favor and kill your boss ARE YOU LOOKING FOR WORK: NO. YOU ARE JOBLESS. DO YOU WANT ME CARNALLY: no STUPID FUCKING QUESTION. WHY WOULD I SLAY MY GOLDEN HONKBEAST. BEFORE IT'S DONE SHITTING OUT EXPENSIVE EGGS. AND FURTHERMORE. IF I WERE TO KILL MY SUGAR DADDY. THEN WHERE WOULD I GET ALL OF MY DELICIOUS SUGAR.
TO REITERATE. SHE HAS TRIED. SHE HAS FAILED. SHE WILL TRY. SHE WILL FAIL AGAIN. SHE DOES NOT REALIZE THAT I KNOW. BuT I HAVE. AND CONTINuE TO. I HAVE. AS THE SAYING GOES. BEEN KNEW. A FAVORITE TIMEOuT CHAIR LAYS IN SPLINTERY REMAINS uNRECOGNIZABLY SMASHED. BECAuSE OF A TASTELESSLY BRuTAL ATTEMPT TO CRACK AN EGG. uNRIPE FOR HARVEST. SHE HAS ATTEMPTED TO KILL ME. VIA BROKEN HEART. BY REMOVING HERSELF FROM EXISTANCE. DRIVING. WITH FEEBLE WOMANLY INSISTENCE. BOTH OF HER MAGICAL NEEDLES. INTO THE NEAREST ELECTRIC SOCKET. SHE HAS EVEN GONE AS FAR. AS TO DEHYDRATE HERSELF. WITH THE SHEER NuMBER OF STuPID FuCKING MISERY FLAVORED TEARS SHE SHEDS NIGHTLY. IN ROOMS EMPTIED OF OTHERS. IN HALLWAYS DEVOID OF FEATuRES. OR TAWDRY LITTLE PHOTOGRAPHS. SPORTING MEMORIES OF GOOD TIMES. THAT DID NOT HAPPEN. OF FAMILY. THAT NEVER TRANSPIRED. OF COSMIC INSTANCES. OF HERSELF. AND PEOPLE WHO ARE MEANINGLESS TO HER OuTSIDE OF THE FELT OuTFIT. KILLING ME. WOuLD NOT BE A FAVOR TO HER. OR ANYBODY FOR THAT MATTER. BuT LEAST OF ALL. HER. ETERNAL SERVITuDE. IS A DOuBLE EDGED SWORD. WHERE DO YOu THINK. ALL THOSE YEARS GO BY. THE MINuTE SHE LEAVES ME? I AM A SPITEFuL EX EMPLOYER. THE SEVERANCE PACKAGE. WILL COME WITH THE SEVERANCE OF LIFESPAN. BACKPAY. FOR EVERY WRINKLE SHE NEVER RECEIVED BENEATH THE EYE. EVERY WIRY WHITE HAIR THAT NEVER SPROuTED ATOP HER HEAD. EVERY IMPOSING CRuNCH BENEATH THE MILLSTONE OF YEARS FLOuTED. OF DEATH KEPT TASTELESSLY AT FuCKING BAY. GOLDEN GOOSE. WHAT A HYSTERICAL ANALOGY. YOu CRACK ME uP. DAMARA. YOuR EXQuISITE. LETHAL. PERFECT LIFE OF ABSOLuTE uNQuESTIONING FEALTY. IT WOuLD COLLAPSE. ALL OF IT AROuND YOu. YOu WOuLD BE IMPRISONED IN A SACROPHAGuS OF YOuR OWN RAPIDLY DECOMPOSING CORPSE. YOuR CHEEKBONES WOuLD FEEL MOBILE. THE SOFTNESS OF YOuR SuPPLE SKIN WOuLD FEEL YANKED TAuT IN A WAY IT HAS NEVER BEEN BEFORE. TIME DENIED AND DELAYED BY YOuR LORD WOuLD HuNT FOR YOu. AND COME TO COLLECT. WITH COMPOuNDED INTEREST. I WOuLD NOT EVEN HAVE TO BE DEAD. ONLY BE IN NEED OF ANOTHER TO REPLACE YOuR OTHERWISE IMMACuLATE SERVICE. YOuR HAIR WOuLD DASHED AWAY LIKE BRAINS ON A SIDEWALK. CuRBSTOMPED REPEATEDLY uNTIL ONLY CASCADES OF MuSHY GREY REMAIN IN DISINTEGRATING CLuMPS. LIVER SPOTS WILL LINE YOuR STuPID FRAIL LITTLE TRAITOROuS KNuCKLES. YOuR VEINS WOuLD RISE IN GNARLY TWISTED LITTLE KNOTS BENEATH YOuR TRANLSuCENT GREY SKIN SuRFACE BEFORE DARKENING. CLOTTING. YOuR JOINTS. ARTHRITIC. WOuLD CLAW AT YOuR THROAT AS YOuR BELLOWSACS FAIL YOu ENOuGH AIR TO SCREAM IN YOuR PRETTY. DELICIOuS VOICE OF SuFFERING. HOW LONG HAVE YOu BEEN. DAMARA? HOW THE SWEEPS. MuST HAVE GOTTEN AWAY FROM YOu. DO YOu KNOW HOW LONG A RuSTBLOOD OF YOuR CASTE AND RuLEBREAKING uNRuLY CHANCE TAKING NOSE THuMBING FuCKING CHuTZPAH IS SuPPOSED TO EXIST? THE BRAZEN NERVE. TO FORGET HOW LONG THE BEAuTY OF YOuR YOuNG ADuLT LIFE HAS BEEN KEPT THE WAY IT IS? YOuR RAuNCHY SEX HAVING. YOuR ROuSTABOuT HOOT OF A FuCKING TIME ALWAYS uNENDINGLY HAD. YOuR BODY. WOuLD DISSOLVE. EVERYTHING YOu ARE. TO PAY BACK YOuR DEBT TO ME. WHAT YOu OWE. FOR SIMPLY BEING ALLOWED TO BE. TO REMAIN IN MY PERFECT WORLD. OF STOPPED TIME. YOu ARE A BLIGHT. AN ANCIENT DISEASE. A FuCKING SET OF WELL MAINTAINED RuINS. AND YOu JOKE ABOuT GOLDEN GEESE? ABOuT HARVESTING ME? YOu. YOu ARE THE HARVEST. MY HANDMAID. YOu ARE THE SERVANT. IT IS YOuR FACE IN THE CARPEST THAT I PISSED ON. GREATLY GRATEFuLLY LAPPING uP WHATEVER REMNANT TRACES OF MY GOLDEN SHOWERINGS OF PATIENT AFFECTION MIGHT EXIST. IN TRACE LITTLE SHOWS. OF ARDENT ASS APPRECIATION. FOR WHAT YOu DO. DRIBBLING DOWN YOuR FACE LIKE PINPRICKS OF BLOOD YOu LET ME CARVE ALONGSIDE YOuR EYES. IN PLACE OF TEARS YOu ARE FAR TOO OLD TO SHED FOR YOuRSELF. YOu ARE DIRT IN DRAG. DAMARA. NEVER AGAIN FORGET WHO KEEPS YOu PRETTY. tumut
not a lotta lovwe for the gals i hang vwith, but enough. latula wvins, meu meu is out. speaking of beforan babes... #cronusbabeoff up next, wvewve got twvo beautiful beforan burgundy bitches, one busty, one bitty b-cups at best, both #bouncingonit, blowving, busting, banging... bam. the rankmaid and damara megido. #nsfwv. #nsfwve. someone post the pumpkin patch pics belovw. and dont go bothering ranky, if you need to bugger someone, hit up @handmaid <3 or <> for the rankmaid <3< or c3< for damz
first match of round one, and unfortunately, this is one i think is gonna be quick and easy. just like our top seed, jade harley! shes going up against the bottom seed, calliope. lets see wvhat chittr thinks of these twvo. <3 or <> for calliope <3< or c3< for jade #cronusbabeoff #suggestivwe
-- ̶c̶a̶r̶b̶o̶l̶i̶c̶G̶a̶l̶v̶a̶b̶o̶l̶o̶g̶i̶s̶t̶ THE CHALKBOX [CG] has used a Juju [THE REDACTION STUB] to alter the timeline. --
YOU SHOULD SEE WHAT HAPPENED TO THE LAST BITCH. WHO FAILED TO MEET HER #WORKPOSTING QUOTA. @TERRIBLEFATE
Quite the sight to vwatch the moons crest the horizon on a wvarm evwening. I lovwe the smell of hardvworking men in the morning. [[Edit by @handMaid]]
FOR TOO LONG. I HAVE BEEN DULLED. DIMMED. BLUNTED. AND BITCHED. BUT AT LONG LAST. THE FIRST GUARDIAN OF CHITTR. HAS SEEN FIT. TO MAKE THE LITTLE GEAR WHEEL. CHANGE TEXT COLORS IN DMS. NO LONGER WILL I BE RELENTLESSLY VICTIMIZED BY CLOWNS IN THE DARK. AND TOO. NO LONGER WILL THE PANDEAD LIGHT THEME CHOOSERS. SUFFER THE SEARING LIGHT OF THE GREEN SUN. WHEN I UNLEASH HELL UPON THEM IN PRIVATE. SHIELD YOUR TENDER BULBS. WE ARE SO FUCKING BACK.
:33 < i drew him fur fun! :PP
((Wait so did you actually make this for the bit or did someone already make an ic macaroni drawing as baby Handmaid??
I LOVE THE SPLASH OF VIOLENCE. THE ELEGANT SIMPLICITY. THE EARLY COMMITMENT SHOWN. YOu ARE RIGHT TO WISH DAMARA. A HAPPY PATERNAL FIGuRE DAY. BECAuSE DESPITE WHAT THE NAME IMPLIES. TODAY. IS NOT ACTuALLY ABOuT YOu. WITHOuT DAMARA. YOu WOuLD NOT BE A FATHER AT ALL. YOu WERE NEVER MY DAD. MERELY. A LOVELY BuTLER WHO DOES EVERYTHING I SAY WITHOuT SHIT TO SAY BACK. RESPECTFuLLY. AND SuBSERVIENT IN ALL THINGS. BuT A FATHER. MAKES THE TOuGH CHOICES. WHICH END OF A PARTIALLY CHEWED AND PARTIALLY DIGESTED BROOM HANDLE TO SWING IN SELF DEFENSE. WHEN A LITTLE GIRL COMES AT YOu SWINGING MuRDEROuSLY. WITH ELECTRIFIED NEEDLES. FRESH FROM A SOCKET. WHAT FOOD TO WITHOLD AND IN WHAT PORTIONS. WHEN A SINGLE SuPPER IS OBSTRuCTED FROM THE LIPS. OF AN uNRuLY BRAT OR TWO. WHICH PARSEC IN uNBREATHEABLE SPACE TO VISIT. WHEN DISASTER AND CHAOS AND PANIC uNRIVALED. PEELS AWAY AT THE GREEN PAINT. OF THE FELT ESTATE ITSELF. YOu HAVE TO MAKE THE HARD CHOICES. BuT YOu ONLY HAVE THAT PRIVILEGE. BECAuSE OF WHO THIS DAY IS REALLY ABOuT. THE REAL. ACTuAL. DAD ENABLER. THE CAuSE FOR CAuSTIC BuRNS. THE CESSATION. OF ALL LIVING FuNCTIONS. TO ANY WHO ANNOY ME. AND MY ESTEEMED. ETERNAL SERVANT. WHETHER SHE LIKES IT. OR CHOOSES TO LIE ABOuT LIKING IT. @handMaid I WISH YOu A HAPPY FATHER'S DAY TOO. CELEBRATE IT IN PLACE OF ME. AND. KNOW THAT THIS ART. IS STILL. STAPLED. SHOT. GLuED. IMMOLATED. CHEWED. PARTIALLY DIGESTED. AND CROWBARED TO THE FRIDGE. AS uNFORGETTABLE. AS WE ALWAYS FOuND YOu.
* ...cute..?
DON'T POST THIS. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU. EDIT: HAPPY DEADBEATS DAY. THANK YOU FOR ALWAYS. PREDICTABLY AND UNFAILINGLY. BLASTING MY EVERY HUMILIATION. ACROSS ALL OF PARADOX SPACE. NO MATTER HOW PETTY. NOR HOW ANCIENT. EDIT: THANK YOU FOR THE POSITIVE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT. WHICH MAKES ME FEEL A WARM AND TENDER BLEND. OF CAREER FULFILLMENT. AND EMPLOYEE SATISFACTION.
UGH... THIS TOO IS SICKLINGLY SWEET.
OFTEN HAVE I BEEN ACCUSED. OF LUSUSLESS BEHAVIOR. THIS IS TRUE. I WAS HATCHED TOO LATE. TO REAP THE BENEFITS. OF BEING REARED BY AN UNSPEAKING WHITE MONSTER. BUT GETTING PARENTED. IS FOR CODDLED WIGGLERS. AND THE IGNORANT. AND UNEDUCATED. I WAS HIVESCHOOLED. ON ALL SUBJECTS. INSTANTLY. BY THE UNIVERSE'S FOREMOST ACADEMIC. AND IT WOULD BE DELUSIONAL TO PRETEND. THERE WERE NOT SOME GOOD PULLS. IN THAT FROTHING CROCK OF DAYMARE FUEL. SUCH AS GODZILLA (1954). OUR WORKING RELATIONSHIP HAS EVOLVED. FROM TEACHER/STUDENT. TO EXECUTIVE/MAID. DOCTOR/PATIENT. AND EVEN HANDLER/WEAPON. BUT SINCE THERE ARE NO DAYS FOR THAT. HAPPY LUSUS DAY. TO THE ONE RESPONSIBLE. FOR ALL MY LUSUS ISSUES. @SCRATCHDOCTOR
He does something to me. #tw-white-man #scary #notclickbait https://i.ibb.co/qF0310kC/4684861185-6715a313e3.jpg
MƐ AND YOU PUPPƐT(@scratchDoctor ) https://filƐ.gardƐn/af6ulCnTFCHPThCz/IMG_5088.jpƐg
ok i mean im basically an honorary felt member and owwn a green suit but wwhat the fuck evver C tier is fine im actually a lotus flowwer in regards to this matter and it doesnt affect me in the slightest
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jesus christ.
:o) Outstanding form, Mr. Scratch.
HE KNOWS BALL.
(|:OOOOO BOSS SCRATCH IS FUCKIN BALLIN!!!!!
i HATE TO ADMIT IT BUT, hE DOES, kNOW BALL,
THIS IS THE ONLY TIME IN MY PROFESSIONAL CAREER I'VE EVER WISHED TO KNOW *LESS* BALL. BEGRUDGING RECHITT.
(=^･⩊･^=) < I'M SO PURROUD OF MEW! MEW TRULY KNOW HOW TO BALL, MR. SCRATCH.
(=^･⩊･^=) < DAMN!! DOC SCRATCH IS FURRCKIN' BALLIN'!
knicks in 5!!!!!!
amoguns us?
TURNING ANOTHER SWEEP OLDER DOESN'T REALLY FEEL LIKE IT MATTERS ALL THAT MUCH, ANYMORE. NOT WHEN YOU'VE ALREADY SPENT TWELVE SWEEPS IN ANCIENT EAST ALTERNIA REALIZING THAT YOU'RE MORE OR LESS TIME-LOCKED INTO THE AGE YOU WERE WHEN YOU WERE CEREBRALLY COERCED INTO SIGNING YOUR FUCKING FAUSTIAN EMPLOYMENT CONTRACT. THAT UNINTENDED LITTLE ROMP, IN ADDITION TO LANDING ME ON TIME ROACH EXTERMINATION DUTY, ALSO HAPPENED TO PAD OUT MY RESUMÉ WITH SOME USEFUL SKILLS. NOT ALL OF THEM ARE THINGS I'M ALL TOO COMFORTABLE TALKING ABOUT HERE IN PLAIN VIEW OF THE ROVING HORDES OF INTERNET PERVERTS LUSTING AFTER ANY #SUGGESTIVE OR OUTRIGHT #NSFW CONTENT THEY CAN HOOK THEIR GREASY PRONGS ON, BUT THERE'S ONE I'VE GOT A PRETTY SOLID HANDLE ON THAT FEELS ESPECIALLY RELEVANT TO BEING A MEMBER OF A CRIMINAL SYNDICATE. 「#SHIBARI.」 ALLOW ME TO EDUCATE THE CULTURE-ALLERGIC DIPSHITS IN THE ROOM ON A FACT ABOUT ROPE. ROPE IS A LIVING THING. NOT LITERALLY, DUMBASS. BUT ROPE IS ORGANIC. HAIR. WOOL. PLANT FIBER. SPUN SILK FROM COCOONS. ROPE IS MADE FROM THINGS THAT ARE *ALIVE,* AND IF YOU TREAT IT LIKE A DEAD THING, IT'LL CHAFE LIKE A MAGGOTY, ROTTEN CORPSE LEFT IN THE SUN TO DESSICATE UNTIL IT FEELS ABOUT AS DELICATE ON THE SKIN AS A CRUSTY, CALCIFIED MANDIBLE. SO HOW DO YOU KEEP IT IN LIVING CONDITION? EASY. WIND IT OUT, PULL IT TAUT, BURN THE FRAYING EDGES. SMOOTH IT DOWN WITH SOFTENING WAX AND WORK IT IN. PAMPER THAT SHIT WHILE YOU YANK IT INTO PLIABLE ORDER. BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY? USE IT. IT WANTS TO BE USED. EXHIBIT A. THE DROOLING, NEEDY BITCH WHO HAD THE AUDACITY TO TALK ABOUT THIS ON MAIN. OBSERVE WHAT A REAL FUCKING MASTER CAN DO WITH A LIVING THING. NOT HER, OBVIOUSLY. SHE HAS ALL THE CHARM AND VIVACITY OF A BUZZING PILE OF FUCKING BLUBBERBEAST GUTS. IF ANYONE WANTS TO LEARN HOW TO INCORPORATE HORN TYING INTO THEIR 「KINBAKU」 PRACTICE, FEEL FREE TO USE THIS AS A FUCKING DIAGRAM. YOU KNOW, SINCE MY BOSS @handMaid DOESN'T MIND THE ATTENTION. AND WHILE WE'RE BRINGING UP "CARTOON FAIRY REVIEWSLOP," I AWAIT YOUR (SECOND) CANDID REVIEW OF THE 2015 JUKEBOX MUSICAL "STRANGE MAGIC" WITH DOWNRIGHT FUCKING GLEEFUL ANTICIPATION. I SAW THE WAY YOU LOOKED AT THE BOG KING. I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE.
#cw-self-harm (slight menti.o°n) Been thinking n.o°w. A hist.o°ry. Culture and cust.o°ms never written .o°r c.o°dified but .o°bserved and .o°bserved. S.o°mething n.o°t really mine. Pe.o°ple wh.o° live f.o°rever but have names which are dead. That questi.o°n better ti live l.o°ng and be f.o°rg.o°tten .o°r die and be remembered f.o°rever. The answer is .o°bvi.o°us it is the f.o°rmer. Mem.o°ries cann.o°t taste cann.o°t see can n.o°t think. I d.o° n.o°t wish ti be a mem.o°ry. I am n.o°t the sum .o°f th.o°se came bef.o°re .o°r a p.o°tential .o°f what I c.o°uld be the past can n.o°t think and the future can n.o°t think .o°nly the me which is here can be th.o°ughtful. There is .o°nly s.o° much time t.o° experience it is f°o.o°lish t.o° be wasteful with it. T.o° give c.o°nsci.o°usness when it is all we have. T.o° dream t.o° sleep n.o° m.o°re? T.o° willingly n.o°t be. It is a little suicide every day. Mass graves under the burning light hiding away fr.o°m it. There are s.o° many wh.o° w.o°uld direct the wayy I am t.o° tell me t.o° sleep t.o° drink n.o°n-carb.o°nated beverages t.o° w.o°rk a pr.o°per j.o°b t.o° settle in a pr.o°per hive t.o° t.o° t.o° t.o° t.o°. I am a g.o°o.d citizen h.o°w I am. I am g°o.o°d. There are s.o°me wh.o° think I enj.o°y b.o°o.t taste. Well. I enj.o°y tasting b.o°o.t far better than never tasting anything again ever ever ever. I d.o° n.o°t drink tea I d.o° n.o°t have teap.o°ts I have never even been in .o°ne .o°f the battle camps as was described by the white man but. I remember spaghetti night. Eating t.o°gether drinking t.o°gether merry t.o°gether. These things are... nice. N.o°t w.o°rth writing a b.o°o.k .o°ver. N.o°t w.o°rth dying .o°ver. But nice. These are lacking in the death. These are lacking when y.o°u resign y.o°urself t.o° mem.o°ries. I will be f.o°rg.o°tten quick I am .o°ne .o°f many .o°ne .o°f billi.o°ns, trilli.o°ns but i will be alive n.o°w and i will have experiences and sensati.o°ns and I will think and I will be. This is n.o°t a manifest.o° simply... I have n.o°t g.o°tten ar.o°und t.o° buying a j.o°urnal fr.o°m the newly .o°pened fact.o°ry yet s.o° this is the best I am having in the m.o°ment. Just interesting which th.o°ughts are spurred up.o°n
THIRTEEN SWEEPS, PAINSTAKINGLY STACKED ATOP THE OTHER, SURVIVED ONE BRUTAL BILUNAR PERIGEE AT A TIME. HALF OF THEM ON A PLANET I WAKE UP AND GIVE THE FAT, FLAMING MIDDLE PRONGSTUB TO EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE, AND THE REST ON A DUMPSTER FIRE OF A WORLD OF MY OWN "CREATION." ONLY SOME OF THEM I WAS REALLY, TRULY PRESENT FOR. THREE *THOUSAND* SWEEPS SPENT IN AN INESCAPABLE TORMENT NEXUS MEANT TO SAND DOWN ANY PROPRIETARY CONCEPT OF TIME I EVER HAD. WHICH I ESCAPED, ANYWAY. BUT NOT BEFORE IT SMOOTHED SOME OF THE HARD, JAGGED EDGES, TRY AS I MIGHT TO SHARPEN THEM BACK TO GANDERBULB-STABBING AND SPONGECASE-BLUDGEONING LETHAL FORCE. AND AS IF I COULDN'T PUSH THE INCREDULITY OF MY SHITHIVE MAGGOTS NARRATIVE ANY FURTHER, TWELVE SWEEPS AFTER THAT, IN A FAR-FLUNG PAST SO STUPID THAT IT'S LEFT INDELIBLE MARKS ON MY VOCABULARY. AND SOME UNCOMFORTABLE SKILLS TO ADMIT ARE CURRENTLY PADDING OUT MY RESUME. A FAT, MALIGNANT PILE OF GREASY BLACK TRASH BAGS IN THE RUSTING DUMPSTER OF MY PERSONAL HISTORY, BOILING IN THE OPEN SUN AS THE LOOMING MONOLITH TO MY EVERY GRUELING SWEEP OF MERCILESS LIFE DARKENS THE FUCKING SKY. SO AT THIS POINT? FUCK IT. WHAT'S ONE MORE? #WRIGGLINGDAY. (AND BEFORE YOU ASK, YES, I'M STILL IN THE FUCKING FELT MANOR. THIS IMAGE HAS BEEN *HEAVILY* DOCTORTURED TO RESEMBLE ANYTHING CLOSE TO EARTH-C'S NATURAL DAYLIGHT. BECAUSE I CAN'T STAND TO SEE ANY MORE FUCKING GREEN. I DECIDED I WANTED TO LOOK O.G., TODAY.)
TWO CAN PLAY. AT EMBARRASSING EACH OTHER ON THE CHITTRNET. PERHAPS CHALKBOX WILL THINK TWICE. BEFORE POSTING HIS CARTOON FAIRY REVIEWSLOP FROM MY ACCOUNT. OTHERWISE. HE RISKS LOSING HIS TITLE. IN FAVOR OF SOMETHING MORE #SUGGESTIVE. SUCH AS #KINBAKAT. THE #NAWASHII. OR MY FAVORITE. THE #PALESLUT. HAPPY WRIGGLING DAY. TO FELT MANOR'S NEWEST TOKEN MALE #SHITHEAD. PS. THAT WOULD MAKE A GOOD TITLE TOO. #WHATHAPPENSINMAIDJAIL.
alright! time to post the lewd thing. viewer beware. using dupe hands to take the selfie was helpful. i'm sure no one's gonna be a dickhead under my post. thanks for the kult i guess! ((art by @tipsyGlamour))
THE #BOSSBITCH STILL REPORTS TO THE #ALPHAMALE AND THE #KYUBALL.
PLEASE DISREGARD ALL MY CHITTS FROM THE LAST TWO LUNAR CYCLES. I WAS NOT LIVING UP TO THE MISSION OF FELT MANOR. OR REPRESENTING THE BRAND. TO MY USUAL STANDARD OF QUALITY. MY STATEMENTS. ATTITUDE. AND ACTIONS. WERE INAPPROPRIATE. UNPROFESSIONAL. AND UNDESERVING OF THE TITLE. OR THE POWERS. I HAVE BEEN GENEROUSLY LOANED. I DEEPLY REGRET. MY SHAMEFUL BEHAVIOR. AND THE REPEATED VIOLENT IMPACT. THAT IT HAD. ON THE TEAM. AND THE WORK ENVIRONMENT. I TAKE FULL RESPONSIBILITY. FOR THE DESTRUCTION. AND REPUTATIONAL DAMAGE. WHICH I CAUSED. DURING MY TEMPORARY PERIOD. OF MAGICAL PANDAMAGE. I VALUE MY POSITION. AND THE OPPORTUNITY TO WORK ON THIS UNIVERSALLY RENOWNED. EXTREMELY SELECTIVE. AND HIGHLY DEVOTED TEAM. I UNDERSTAND THE IMPORTANCE. OF MAINTAINING A HARMONIOUS. RESPECTFUL. AND LOTUSFUL WORKPLACE. I WILL WORK DILIGENTLY ON MY BEHAVIOR MOVING FORWARD. I WILL ALSO FIX THE FUCKUGLY STAINED GLASS. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER. #WORKPOSTING.
THEY ARE MAKING US DO FIDUSPAWN FOR WORK. #WATCHTHISSPACE.
HOW IT FEELS. EVERY TIME SOME WORM. SLITHERS OUT OF THE WOODWORK. TO DISPARAGE MY #NONHOSTILEWORKPLACE. AND MY #EMPLOYEROFCHOICE. #GETBEHINDME.
GREAT POST #BOSSMAN. SO FULL OF NOTHING. THAT I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER READING IT. SO WHAT WAS THE POINT.
HEY. IT IS THE DEVERIFIED LORD ENGLISH. EVERYONE. DEFER TO LITERALLY ANYONE FuCKING ELSE. ARE YOu DONE LICKING YOuR BITCHMADE WOuNDS YET. I AM READY TO HAVE ANOTHER GO AT IT. IF YOu AREN'T. YOu MISERABLE FuCKING WHELP OF AN uNWIPED SHITSTAIN. MAY THE BLACKHOLE MAELSTROM THAT SuCKS YOu uP DO SO PERMANENTLY.
I STILL REALLY HATE. HAVING TO HIGHLIGHT YOuR HAIR. WITH THE BLOOD OF YOuR LOVED ONES. IT IS REALLY INCONSIDERATE OF THEM. TO NOT SIMPLY DIE OF uNNATuRAL CAuSES. WHILE YOu LOOK ON IN TERROR. AS THEY TWITCHILY REACH FOR YOu. THEIR LIPS CONTORTED IN FuCKING AGONY. AS THEY WHISPER A CuRSING OF YOuR NAME. FOR YOuR GENERAL IMPOTENT GODDAMN EFFORT. TO DO DICKFuCKALL. TO SAVE THEM. YOu INCOMPETENT NITWIT. HIGHLIGHT THE TEXT. OR GO TO FuCKING HELL IGNORANT.
evverybody thank you for your brief attention as you may or may not knoww i am going to be participating in the wwonderful lairs and lusii game run by the wwoegothe herself so wwithout further ado here is my vvery belovved and special character i wwill be playing as and hopefully larping as if i can get the costume together the plucky the noble the esoteric the hedge wwizard and druid magician faunlovve naturals (he/him) https://cdnimgchestcom/files/817dd60aa161jpeg #lairsandlusii #hedgemage #wwizardposting #fantasy #lovve #nature #healing #prophecy #bignaturals
}(]]]]]) < let's all hear five biǦ booms for this fool > ([[[[[){ }(]]]]]) < #ǦuzmoǦǦed > ([[[[[){ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/1b08ab7bbcaa.j₽eǦ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/09febc8f8f90.j₽eǦ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/a17262a5c358.j₽eǦ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/5b169c884009.j₽eǦ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/fb32cd10ea64.j₽eǦ
EVERYONE THINKS THEY'RE SPECIAL. NEWS FLASHBANG. FOR THE CASUAL READER. YOU ARE NOT SPECIAL. YOU WILL NEVER BE SPECIAL. YOU WILL NEVER ATTAIN. A FRACTION OF A FRAGMENT. OF THE UNMATCHED SWAG. NOR THE EMPLOYEE SATISFACTION. THAT WE HAVE ON TAP. AT FELT MANOR. YOU WILL NEVER SAY. TO THE COWERING NEW HIRE. 「WE RUN THIS BUSINESS. LIKE A FAMILY.」 AND LAUGH IN THEIR FACE. AS YOU SLAM THE DOOR TO THEIR CELL.
ok well h|||||| :)
YOu SPEAK WITH THE PRETENSION AND POSERLY GRAVITAS OF SOMEONE WHO SINCERELY BELIEVES THEY DESERVE TO EXIST. YOu SPEAK. BuT HAVE NOTHING TO SAY. YOu ARE ALREADY HERE. BuT WITH NOTHING TO DO. YOu ARRIVED. BuT BROuGHT NOTHING TO THE GODDAMN TABLE. YOu BITCHLESS IRRITANT. EVEN THE CAIRO OVERCOAT IS POORLY TAILORED FOR uGLY ASS FREAKISHLY VEINY ARMS AND DuMBFuCK WINGLESS STATuRE SuCH AS YOuR OWN. YOu ARE STuNTED. A FAILED ADuLT. A MONuMENT TO HAVING BEEN FuCKED SO uNRECOGNIZABLY BEYOND SALVAGING. YOu CANNOT EVEN CALL YOuRSELF CALIBORN ANYMORE. YOu ARE IF ADOLESCENCE ITSELF HAD AN ABORTION. NO FEATS. ONLY POTENTIAL ENGLISH MAN. NO SuCCESS. YOuR GREATEST ACCOMPLISHMENT. IS ALLEGEDLY. FORMERLY. BEING ME. NO ONE IS SCARED OF YOu. IMPRESSED BY YOu. AND BEYOND ME. EVEN ACKNOWLEDGES YOuR JANKY BITCHASS WALKING EPILEPSY WARNING FLAT CHEEKED ASS. WHERE DID IT ALL GO? IS YOuR ASS A SOLAR PANEL TO CHARGE ALL THOSE TINSEL LIGHTS? YOu CHRISTMAS CuCKOLD? YOu ARE THE MOST SKIPPABLE PART. IN MY ENTIRE MYTHOS. A COMPuTER VIRuS. CuCKED FROM GREATER PLOT RELEVANCE. BY FuCKING WINDOWS DEFENDER. YOu ARE A SAD. STuPID BITCH. uNDESERVING OF THE ME-APPOINTED TITLE OF LORD. I WOuLD CALL YOu ENGLISH. BuT YOuR PAVEMENT SCRAPING BALLS. AND GONOD TIER DICKISH DIGS. MAKE IT HARD TO CALL YOuR VOICE ANYTHING BuT COMPENSATING FOR EVERYTHING. IS IT COLD. IN THE INKY BLACK REACHES OF SPACE. OR DOES BEING BuTTFuCKED BY A MuSCuLAR HORSE FETISHIST. BEING CRAMMED INTO A RECOMBINANT WALKING CLOWN CAR STYLE ORGY. OF EVERYONE’S LEAST FAVORITES. MAKE YOuR SCHLONG RETRACT INTO YOuR PuBIC BONE. uNTIL YOuR JuNK RESEMBLES YOuR SISTER’S. YOu STuPID FuCKING HALFWIT. @themanintheCairoovercoat TAKE THAT SHIT OFF AND WEAR SOMETHING MORE YOuR SPEED. LIKE A SET OF BuTLER DuDS. YOu LIVE TO SERVE ME. YOu BITCHMADE LITTLE FuDDY DuDDY FuCKHEAD. I LIKED YOu BETTER WHEN YOu RESEMBLED THE JACKASS IN THE BOX GuY. YOu DESERVED TO BE KILLED OFFSCREEN IN ONE LINE. BuT HERE IS A COuPLE MORE. THIS WAY YOuR DEATH IS uNAMBIGuOuS THIS TIME. tumut
YOu MAY PET HER. ONCE.
I AM CHARMED DEEPLY. BY YOuR DECISION TO STATE THIS TWICE.
SHE IS A TASMANIAN DEVIL. DO THEY ALL LOOK THE SAME TO YOu? NYRITA. FOR SHAME.
SHE KNOWS THIS. I WOuLD NOT WANT TO INSuLT HER INTELLIGENCE. OR WASTE HER TIME. BY TELLING HER THINGS SHE ALREADY KNOWS. BuT YOu COuLD TELL HER. I BROuGHT HER FACE uP TO THE SCREEN. TO READ YOuR TEXT. SHE STARTED HOWLING SOMETHING GODAWFuLLY INAPPROPRIATE. I THINK. SHE LIKES YOu GALYNE ROMERA. YOu CAN BE HER GODPARENT. IF ANYTHING SHOuLD HAPPEN TO ME. IT WILL NOT. I CHECKED. I OuTLIVE THIS THING BY A FACTOR OF EONS. BuT IF I GET BORED. YOu MAY BE CONTACTED BY A VERSION OF ME. TO LOOK AFTER. THIS BEAuTIFuL PRINCESS.
LOOSE. I WILL HAVE YOu KNOW. KITTYBITCH IS A LADY. SHE WOuLD NEVER BEHAVE. WITH YOuR PROMISCuOuS OPENNESS. COVER YOuR EARS. KITTYBITCH. AND YOu CAN BE REST ASSuRED. SHE IS FAR FROM THE ONLY WILD ANIMAL. THAT ROAMS THESE HALLS. uNLESS YOu REALLY HAVE NOT FOuND THE MICE YET. SPEAKING OF. SHOuLD YOu NOT BE GETTING AROuND. TO DOLING THAT TASK OuT TO DOC SCRATCH. TO GET AROuND TO? TICK TOCK. I AM GETTING HuNGRY. I WILL START GNAWING ON THE FuRNITuRE AGAIN. IF I AM NOT ADEQuATELY FED. TICK TOCK TICK TOCK TICK TOCK. OKAY. YOu MAY RESuME LISTENING. KITTYBITCH.
MuCH APPRECIATED. GALYNE. YOu ARE TRuLY. ONE OF THE SPARED.
DIFFERENT ROLE ENTIRELY. YOu KNOW WELL ENOuGH TO PROCESS. THAT SOMEBODY I WOuLD INSTRuCT. TO MAKE AN uTTER FuCKING FOOL OF HERSELF. IN FLAPPER GARB AND WHORE REGALIA. IS NOT THE SAME THING. AS A TASMANIAN DEVIL. WHOSE MALFORMED FuR. AND VARIOuS BALDING PATCHES. ARE ALL VACINATED AGAINST RABIES SEPARATELY. THEY ARE NOT EVEN THE SAME SPECIES. KITTYBITCH. IS DIFFERENT. FROM MY KITTY SPACEBAR PRESS BITCH. WHO CLEANS MY OVENS.
NO. THOSE WERE ME. ACTuALLY. I WILL OWN uP TO THAT.
DO NOT INSTIGATE CONFLICT. AROuND KITTYBITCH. SHE ALWAYS WINS. ALWAYS.
THIS. IS MY PET. I CALL HER. KITTYBITCH. SHE IS A DEVIL. OF THE TASMANIAN VARIETY. HER BACKSTORY. IS THAT SHE ATE ALL HER PREVIOuS OWNERS. BuT SHE COuLD NOT EAT ME. BECAuSE WE ARE COOL. KITTYBITCH. LIKE ME. ALSO KILLED HER SISTER. A KINDRED SOuL. KITTYBITCH. ADORES YOu. AND IF YOu DO NOT SHARE HER LORE. WITH AT LEAST ONE OTHER PERSON. SHE WILL APPEAR IN YOuR DREAMS. DEMANDING PETS. CuDDLES. AFFECTIONS. AND TREATS. SHE WILL EAT. IMMuNITY DOG. OR ANY MEANS. OF CIRCuMVENTING THIS EFFECT. ^ / \ ^ _,-~~~--~~~--._ ( \ / \ _,-' `.__ ( \_.---._/ ) ,' `-(_` -' `-. ) / "--.. \.' `/ , `-. : _ .-. _ : / ; : (0).oYo.(0) ; / ` \.-'V'"'V'-./ / ' \\^ ^// /\ / ' : : .-'\\^ ^// ; \ ; / ,' _.-`. `. : \\^_^// ; \ ; ;`. ,'~~-' `. `.`.`-.-' \ |_/ ; `. /-'/___.---. `-. `.`---. \ / | /____.---.))) `-. `---.\ \_____/ (____________))))\\\ `-.\\\\ \\\\
#NOWPLAYING.
CHITTR GOES SO FuCKING HARD. WHEN YOu JuST BLOCK PEOPLE YOu DO NOT LIKE. INDISCRIMINATELY. LIKE A SPRAY OF BuLLETS. INTO A CROWD OF SITTING DuCKS. LIKE IN HIT VIDEO GAME. DuCK CuNT. https://i.imgur.com/DVngyli.png
MY FELLOW ALTERNIANS. WE GOT HIS ASS. #ISEKAIOVER! #UESUGIKARKAT 🎨: @CARBOLICGALVANOLOGIST
(=^･⩊･^=) < OF COURSE!!
MAY YOUR STAY BE UNFORGETTABLE 🗝「It felt good to boo this.」
(=^･⩊･^=) < DAMN!!! LOOKIN' GOOD, SIR!
It is said that after this incident occurred, Uesugi Karkat was silent and motionless for three nights and three days. A truly uncharacteristic lacuna for a historical figure of such prolific loquaciousness. Whatever he must have heard on that day must have been too disturbing for even a short-form romantic poem reflecting on the event to survive.
hell ye/\h brϴther yϴ\/ shϴ\/ld cϴme ϴver sϴmetime we cϴ\/ld pl/\y sϴme trϴll xbϴx
:)
CAN WE ALL TAKE NOTE. OF HOW I GOT THE SHORTEST TALKING-TO. AGAIN CEMENTING. MY UNSHAKABLE POSITION. AT THE APEX OF THE CRAB BUCKET.
:o( Yes, Mr. Scratch. :o( Thank you for your illuminating words. :o( I will do better.
YOU IF YOU WERE A BATH BOMB.
(=^･⩊･^=) < THIS IS SO COOL!!!
Heeding it. What the fuck
Man,
Don't encourage him,
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO -- carbolicGalvanologist [CG] has lost connection to the timeline. --
HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA HAA!!!! #JANITORJAIL
ATTENTION, WORTHLESS CHITTRLINGS. LONG TIME, NO CHITT. THERE HAVE BEEN SOME *AGGRAVATING* DEVELOPMENTS IN MY CAREER AS A PLATFORM USER, AS A CREATOR, AND ABOVE ALL, AS ONE OF THE UNLUCKY JACKOFFS STILL UNACCOUNTABLY FORCED TO EXIST IN A PLACE AND TIME WITHIN A MULTIVERSAL CONTINUITY OF ENDLESS, CACOPHONOUS FUCKRUMPUS PARADOX CHICANERY. BECAUSE I'VE BEEN BUSY TRYING AND FAILING TO WRIGGLE OUT OF THESE DEVELOPMENTS, I HAVEN'T REALLY BEEN AROUND TO PROVIDE AN UPDATE. I'M GOING TO DO THAT NOW. SO DON'T MAKE ME REPEAT MYSELF, BECAUSE I WON'T. I'LL JUST PULL UP THIS CHITT, SEIZE YOU VIOLENTLY BY THE HEAD, AND SHOVE YOUR BLOODSHOT GANDERBULBS AGAINST THE SCREEN UNTIL THE AMBIENT HEAT COOKS THEM LIKE EGGS. READ, SHITSPONGE. READ THIS AND GET OFF MY DORSAL RIDGE ABOUT IT, BECAUSE I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU THE WHOLE. FUCKING. SCOOP. STARTING WITH THE BIG ONE. I WORK FOR THE FELT, NOW. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. I CAN HEAR THE QUESTION AT THE VERY FRONT OF YOUR THOUGHTSPONGE DOING BACKFLIPS, FRONTFLIPS, CARTWHEELS, AND ACROBATIC FUCKING PIROUETTES. "KARKAT, WHAT KIND OF TURBO-CHARGED JUJU-FLAVORED CRACK HAVE YOU BEEN SMOKING TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT? DIDN'T YOU SPEND YOUR ENTIRE SESSION FIGHTING THIS JOLLY GREEN MANLET AND HIS BUMBLING CADRE OF BUMBLING ASS-BURGLARS? WHAT IN THE FRESH, FULMINATING *FUCK* MADE YOU SIGN A CONTRACT WITH *THESE* LOONEYBLOCK TIME BANDITS?" THE SHORT ANSWER? THE MIME MADE ME DO IT. LITERALLY. MY SPONGE STILL HURTS FROM WHERE HE SHOVED HIS PRONG IN IT LIKE A GLOVE AND MADE ME TYPE UP THAT APPLICATION. AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE PLAN IS HERE, BUT I'M WILLING TO BET *ANYTHING* THAT HE'S GOT ONE. SO YES. AGAINST MY WILL. AGAINST MY BETTER JUDGEMENT. AGAINST A THOUSAND ETERNITIES OF BALEFUL, ENDLESS SUFFERING, I HAVE A NEW NINE TO FIVE. AND WITH IT, A NEW TITLE. ONE WHICH I AM *OBLIGATED* TO USE IN OFFICIAL CAPACITY, BUT I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU CALL ME "CHALKBOX" WHILE I'M OFF THE CLOCK, I'M GOING TO INVENT A NEW WAY TO PERFORM A LOBOTOMY. FUCK YOU, KURLOZ. FUCK YOU, SCRATCH. AND MOST OF ALL, COMING IN HARD WITH THE FUCK YOU X3 COMBO, IT'S A WHOPPING FIVE-SCOOP, CHOCOLATE-DRIZZLED FUCK YOU SUNDAE FESTOONED WITH OBLONG BUNCHFRUIT, WHIPPED CREAM, SPRINKLES, AND A CHERRY-RED MIDDLE FINGER ON TOP FOR MR. MALDING GREEN MANLET HIMSELF. I'M WEARING THE BADGE OUT OF SPITE. I AM CLOCKING IN FOR THE LONGEST DAY AT THE LONG DAY FACTORY I HAVE EVER WORKED. AND IF I EVER MANAGE TO CLOCK OUT, THERE WILL BE *HELL* TO PAY. ANYWAYS. I HAVE TO GO MOP UP A NASTY, REEKING PUDDLE OF NON-NEWTONIAN ECTO-PHLEGM, OR SOMETHING. HERE'S A PICTURE FOR THE ALGORITHM. THIS IS THE CHALKBOX, SAYING, "GO BRING THAT PILE OF DIRTY CUPS AND PLATES IN YOUR RESPITEBLOCK TO THE SINK, YOU FILTHY, WALLOWING SLOBHOGS." HTTPS://CDN.IMGCHEST.COM/FILES/67CB4DD16DFF.JPG
MAY YOUR STAY BE UNFORGETTABLE 🗝「Hmh. Doornook. #nsfw」
YOuR FAVORITE CHITTR uSER IS @caliBorn. HOW ABOuT YOuRS?
concept: a small dom leaning up onto their tip toes to grab their big sub by the hair and force them to bend all the way down to their eye level a small dom holding the leash to a big sub that towers over them a big sub who could so easily overpower their small dom physically making the willing choice to be beaten and bruised and not stop it from happening a big sub looking so scary and intimidating but turning into a pathetic barkbeast as soon as their small dom snaps their fingers and points to the ground in front of them (tags: Small Dom/Big Sub, even better if the big one is the top, could switch, extreme size difference, size difference, no quads mentioned, caste difference, #rankworks, #nsfw, bdsm, petplay, mm, ff, archive rating: M)
I AM RESCINDING MY HATE REACT JUST SO THAT YOU *REALLY* FEEL THE FULL BRUNT OF THE ATTACK WHEN I SAY THAT I AM "CLUBBING YOU" SO FUCKING HARD RIGHT NOW.
cronus amporas guide to the ladies part 1: rose lalonde #nsfwv #nsfvwe #substance #dubcon #cagttl first in my kinda arbitrary order is rose lalonde, rosie, blondie, cutest babe to evwer scovwl at me. trunkbeast in the block, yeah youre gonna need one into dudes, but thats more common that youd think. wveirdly more common than some of the other gals into gals, ewven. second point of order, roses are freaks. ewvery single one, iwve newver met one that isnt. this means that youvwe got an in, but not necessarily an easy one. youvwe gotta prowve to her that you can provwide wvhat her owvn fucked up pan vwants. usually this means dealing wvith her lusus issues. she wvants a masculine figure to giwve control to so that she can pretend like she isnt messed up about mommy. her loss is your gain. theyre also usually drinking too much of the seer juice, so doing stuff they vwouldnt expect is a good in. that or shes drinking the soporifics, dont see this one super often, but the vway to take advwantage of that is obwvious. wvhatewver it is, just position yourself as someone she can giwve control to. a fawvorite line of mine is "wvhos gonna believwe me anyvways?" my personal fawvorite is the "oh no please dont" style rose. this is the one that showvs off wvhat shes got, puts herself into situations, but acts frosty anywvays. think of her like a meovwbeast. you cant come on too quick, you gotta let her come to you, figure out vwhat she wvants. a good compliment vwill usually set her off in the right wvay, preferably something crass as possible to immediately get her off-balance. tits or ass wvorks, though some vwont be impressed by that, so get creatiwve! once youwve got her on the defensiwve you can figure out vwhat her thing is. does she get off to the shame of being seen around a dude like you? do her knees go vweak at the idea of taking orders? cant handle some trollhandling? shell hiss and scratch a little, but keep up the pressure and shell crack. shell get all blushy evwen as she snarks, and shell call you a creep but she wvont stop you. these ones lowve getting taken somewvhere priwvate to "chevw you out" wvhen really they just wvant an excuse to giwve you the chance to feel em up evwen more obwviously. then youwve got the magic dabblers. magic is fake as hell, obvwiously, i think vwhat they technically do is majykks or howvevwer you spell it. doesnt matter. these ones are bored as hell and theyre wvilling to make it just about anyones, uhh... the opposite of a problem. you see a rose thinking about testing a spell from some spooky tome on herself, encourage it, shes one of these. if they can find some excuse to giwve you the reins, they wvill. find a vway to justify your ovwn magical acumen. these are usually the type wvho wvanna givwe up control, wvanna stop thinking, so take charge and giwve that to em. i think if you leawve any rose alone vwith an esoteric tome long enough she becomes one of these, so go for it if thats vwhat youre into. if youvwe got a rose vwho doesnt seem to fall into either category, but youre sure she could like dudes, then you gotta mold her yourself. make jabs at her competence, emphasize hovw easy it is for you to push her around physically, make her feel small. shell push back, but youre prodding at stuff shes already thinking about herself. shell nevwer accept you as her equal so you gotta tear her dovwn until shes about to implode, then offer yourself as a shoulder to cry on. a confidante. she can trust you, vwho wvould you tell, vwho wvould believwe you? then you make your mowve. make her feel useful, use her, make her think that givwing you her body is just as good as wvovwing you wvith her mind. you gotta be her rock. the genetic predisposition to soporifics abuse is a great help here. shes used to feeling this wvay, ewven if she cant admit it, you gotta make it feel good. make her associate this state vwith pleasure, wvith you. if you can do that, youvwe got her in the palm of your hand. alright, time for the rating bod: roses havwe a lotta wvariance, ivwe seen em scrawvny and iwve seen em curvwy as hell. bonus points for being blonde and making the best faces vwhen theyre mad. 8/10 vwariety: 9/10 you can get a rose for just about any mood you might havwe, but theyll usually act grumpy about it ease: you gotta wvork a little bit to make a rose put out, but theyre usually entertaining enough its not frustrating. 6/10 personality: i lovwe em for their rambling, makes for fun banter, but i can see hovw itd put some people off. the ice queen schtick really does it for me those 7/10 ovwerall? ten outta ten babes, cant complain. im alwvays happy to see a nevw rosie in the bubbles and figure out her deal. usually her deal ends up being an unhealthy obsession vwith xeno-biology
HTTPS://I.IBB.CO/BVYMTDVW/IMAGE.PNG IT'S PERHAPS A LITTLE EARLY FOR LUSUSDAY PART TWO. BUT IT'S NEVER A BAD TIME FOR #WORKPOSTING. BEHOLD THE MOST FEARSOME. TERRIFYING. DEADLY. TWISTED. #OPPRESSIVE. #EVIL. SADISTIC. VIOLENT. CUNNING. LYING. CHEATING. BETRAYING. SOULLESS. #ABUSE IVE. WICKED. MONSTER EVER TO SET FOOT ON ALTERNIA. ISN'T SHE DARLING. BELIEVE IT OR NOT. THAT'S ME. AND THE HORRORS I AM CAPABLE OF. ARE MAYBE. UP TO FIFTY PERCENT DUE TO. THE FLAWLESS. UNIMPEACHABLE. SOLITARY CONFINEMENT BASED REARING. OF THE ARCHITECT OF ARMAGEDDON. THE CEO OF CAUSALITY. THE FAUST WITH THE MAUST. MY #BOSSMAN. @SCRATCHDOCTOR
An unnamed individual, unrelated to any #masquerade event taking place. Part trois. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/69c71ccb275b.png
since t)(e damn cat's outta t)(e bag: no, i dont serve t)(e felt. its a contract kinda deal. t)(at jolly green giant is t)(e only fuck i answer to. if any cueballs or pre-pubescent green little gremlins come at me, fuck off.
I have not but I support you in your endeavor.
yeah, been there. still trying to crack that metaphorical nut.
THIS PARTICULAR FUCKER IS TRYING SO HARD TO GET ME TO BITE ONTO WHATEVER SHIT HE'S SLURRING FROM HIS PAN.
◌ That aside. There's a very beautiful view outside of this cabin. If I smoked, this would be the perfect time to lean against the window and do that. #substance ⧂
Greetings to the new followers I have amassed during my exposition on the hue swapped cheru8 lifestyles. May this inform8tion serve you well.
WHO UP CHITTING THEY R
# Ju$t heard $ome offi¢e go$$ip on the way out that apparently one of my employee$ ha$ a flu$h ¢ru$h on me! ¢an you believe it? $ome little teal in marketing! Poor guy, I ought to let him down ea$y! But I ¢an't really blame him, ha! #
> 1f there 1s a g0d they must be laugh1ng s0 hard at me g01ng 1n the blender rn (1ll be F1NE 1 just need t0 B1TE PE0PLE 1 swear t0 fuck) 1n 0ther quest10ns, any0ne kn0w 0f any rage r00ms. 1 need t0 let The 1mpulses w1n
- No. This literally can't be happening. #TheHatred 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Slapped And Then Kissed By A Mean, Old, Beautiful Nun. Next Question.
t0 be entirely h0nest pr0bably the sec0nd 0ne
would you rather go to the good place !n the sky or bad place underground
Umm-- wishful thinkin' but I think it'd be nice t' sit in a field of earth flowers... and bask in th' earth sun... provided they're not dangerous. It'd be nice t' be there with a matesprit or somethin'...
- He will pay for this. 😆
- You know what. At least mmy mmoirail CAN'T see the part that's happening now. 😂😂 #ThatFreakingGuy 🤣🤣🤣😀
‧₊˚❀༉‧₊༄﹏𓊝˚.﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖ Ψar, 𝚿e can bi⚓︎e an𝚿☸ne a⚓︎ leas⚓︎ ☸nce. ﹏༄˖°❀⋆˖.ೃ࿔*:･.☠
>> to everyone ¡ keep acc¡denta11y hate react¡ng, ¡'m ડorry 🥹 un1eડડ you know that you deડerved ¡t, then actua11y, fuck you (moડt of you don't deડerve ¡t tho ¡ ડwear !!)
FIRE.
B33 < harrier dubois core
rate the club fit https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/d823f471b89d.jpeg https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/d8d54ca77f3f.jpeg https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/c7da89d028b0.jpeg
The last thing parado+x space needs is ano+ther po+dcast.
do not bring weaponS to fight night juSt to feed THem to me no matter how much i'm capable of doing it. you can do THat Some oTHer time (i gueSS???)
@aeneasCaldarium @aer9dynamicTramp I kn9w we've already 6riefly t9uched up9n this discussi9n 9n the air, 6ut I w9uld like t9 9nce again p9sit an argument f9r the value 9f daily rec9rding sessi9ns 9f 9ur 6ef9rus 69ys p9dcast. If we want t9 keep 9ur listeners inf9rmed, d9ing it "just kind 9f whenever" is simply is n9t en9ugh time t9 c9ver every intricate detail a69ut the #Matriarchical structure 9f 6ef9rus s9ciety, especially if s9me pe9ple (n9t naming names) insist 9n interjecting every f9rty-five minutes t9 relate the t9pic 6ack t9 his ex-matesprit. #6ef9rus69ys #P9dcast #CurrentlyAvaila6le9nAP9dcatcherNearY9u
#notsovagueposting https://media.tenor.com/XEpU8owDd_oAAAAM/gladiator-vengeance.gif
BREAKING NEWS! Say, #ave you ever #eard of C#annel 612 News? I'm sure you #ave! We deliver on only t#e most pressing of issues, events, and ongoings! And I'm sure you've #eard of me, t#e esteemed anc#or, C#ipps Danely! I'm pleased as punc# to report to you (yes YOU!) t#at I am now on C#ittr as a representative of C#annel 612 News! I'm looking forward to relaying t#e latest #appenings to you all live from YOUR #usktop screen!
<3 - velvet <> - silk <3< - leather c3< - lace
what else would it be? 0?0
@2cratchDoctor whiite text entiity thiing why diid you follow me? II mu2t know.
https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/d0f750a091b8.jpg oh great. better to know than not i guess!
First domino type shit.
Finally in contact with the real intellectuals of our age. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/53b1fdcbd174.png
@scratchd🔅ct🔅r idk what this is but thanks f🔅r the new bling, i've never had a pendant like this bef🔅re. i alm🔅st h🔅pe its actually fr🔅m y🔅u and that it wasn't s🔅me🔅ne else breaking int🔅 my fucking hive. my lusus is g🔅ing t🔅 think its ssunbelievable and think i st🔅le it which means he's g🔅nna use me t🔅 get him m🔅re stuff but its pretty sick s🔅 i d🔅n't think i give a shit.
WHITE BALL UNHAND ME!?
peetah the cueball is heeyah
@scratchDoctor 👁
HTTPS://I.IBB.CO/B2PQRJFB/BOONBUX-COPY.PNG BOSS MAKES A BOONBUCK. I MAKE A BOONDIME. THAT'S WHY I CHITTR. ON COMPANY TIME. #NEWPINNED #FUCKBITCHES #GETBOONS
I have found several items that had been missing or misplaced in the search for this ...whatever @scratchDoctor has hidden. I'm beginning to suspect this may have been an elaborate means of getting things tidied up. At least as far as the Manor is concerned.
#eridanweek #horror You find yourself in the same cubicle you've worked for the past ten years in. You find yourself alone in the half lit office building. You are the last individual in the building, everyone else has families at home. You gaze at the CRT Monitor displaying its 600 x 400 resolution. You are comforted by the warm hum radiating from its core. You flit your pupils about your digital workspace, resting on the internet explorer icon. You decide to click it, check a few personal emails. You are invited to a website, chittr.ing, it's called. You see it's created by an Alternian. @dynamicFlowfields You see your standard social media fare when you register. You see pictures of friends and foes of old sharing good tidings. You feel a warmth inside. You however, lose that warmth when you notice a small trend. You saw it every dozen posts or so. #imcoming. You chalked it up to an innuendo. You did not register the warning. You look into it a bit more as it begins to populate your feed. You see #eridanweek, your see #bouncingonit. You see no reason to be worried. You let yourself be comfortable once more. You find yourself reading one of Rankmaid's fictive narratives. @archiveAddict You don't let it excite you too much, you're still at work. You don't give #imcoming much more mind. You don't even realize it's already the second day of #eridanweek. You look at the clock, it is midnight. You wet your eyes with eyedrops, ever handy. You can not seem to turn away just yet. You begin to experience Eridan Week vicariously through the posts. You see the likes of humorous, possibly purely jesting, celebrities from Alternia and Beforus. You notice that nearly ever post of Eridan Week includes #imcoming. You notice that #imcoming slowly turns to #ImComing. You are uneasy from the new threat. You look elsewhere, exploring other tags such as #teatime and catching up with others who aren't involved. You see irrelevant posts to Eridan Week even begin to include #imcoming. You begin to see odd images aghast across your dashboard. You begin to see yourself in images you weren't aware of being taken. You see yourself commenting on posts long since past. You did not write these. You keep seeing it. You even begin to post #imcoming in these retroactive oddities. You assume that this is due to someone mimicking your identity. You attempt to steer conversation on the platform away from it. You hastily type up humor, and romantic posts. You are doing anything you can to drown out #ImComing. You notice it is larger now. #IMCOMING. You select the tag, out of sheer curiosity and perhaps a fear for survival. You need to know who is coming. You. You are coming. You scroll endlessly through the tag. You see yourself on every post. You see your own hollow words. You see your notifications begin to shift. You are bombarded, first, a dozen #IMCOMING Responses. You refresh. You see a hundred. You refresh. You see a thousand. You click one. You see yourself. You click another. You see your own account again. You scroll down your feed. You only see your own account. You see your profile picture, stretched, compressed, tortured, reflected in glass. You do not remember seeing yourself like this before. You try to log out. You fail. You try to close the browser. You fail. You try to shut of the monitor. You are tortured by its continued hum. You step away. You notice the lights are long since turned out. You notice the office is even darker than usual. You see the distant lights of other monitors flicker. You notice a rhythm. You notice a heartbeat. You notice it isn't yours. You look back to the screen. You see #ImComing is #ImHere. You do not remember this post. You do not remember thinking it. You see a live feed open itself. You see your grainy, monochrome cubicle in an old video. You see your chair, your desk. You see yourself. You are not looking at the monitor. You are looking at the camera. You see the image distorting as the alternate self begins to move closer. You see it distort the frame. You hear it. You do not have speakers. You hear it under you, or around you. You hear its cacophony of whispers. You hear it gently say, "I'm here." You see the monitor flicker. You see the camera cut out. You monitor briefly turns out as you lean forward. You see yourself in your own reflection, only behind you. You see chittr.ing return. You see a new post. You see @you. You see an image loading slowly. You clench your nails in anticipation as each line slowly creeps into rendering. You see your cubicle again. You notice it is empty. You aren't even there. You see the caption. #IMHERE You feel something breathing on your neck. You stand up to leave. You see its fingers slowly extend past your peripheral vision. You close your eyes. You shouldn't have stayed.
the evil hat from the human movie meet the robinsons
the number 8
My mom left another passive-aggressive wizard statue on my desk. I am going to transmute it into a pregnant typhochlaena seladonia specimen. #WitchChittr #Occultism #Arachnophobia #Suppose-I-am-better-off #Letting-it-stay-where-it-lay #Shuffled-under-a-cup-and-piece-of-printer-paper #Shoo-shoo
arigatou gozaimasu for 200 followers kyaa (tags: The Rankmaid/Chitter, rankmaid-sensei, my face, #nsfw, #gore, archive rating: T) https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/7ed72d593824.png https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/20d8180d534e.png https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/2d5573922a86.png https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/135e05e2f0bb.png
i hate y0u.
Such an interesting thing, to have connections that span so far beyond localized space and reality. So many different faces, possibilities, so many inane and unhinged social trends and fads. There is no greater party than one where the doors have been burst off their hinges, free for the rabble to pour through and devour the food, drinks and furniture whole. And of course, I arrive fashionably late.
awoooo!!!
I will admit, though I am granted near-omniscience by nature, the further the timeline moves past the completion of my purpose the darker my vision grows. Such is also true of other timelines and universes marked by my other charming selves. Normally this is no concern of mine, all that I need to know is what is necessary for the summoning of my Lord. Still, this website offers a unique opportunity to expand my gaze and illuminate the darkest of pockets. And, to use a phrase that I rarely am given a chance to: I wonder what I will discover. Haa Haa. Hee Hee. Hoo Hoo.
Oh. https://i.imgur.com/9lZFqYf.png #NSFW #ClinicalPsychologyPosting #Seen
This is the refined taste I can respect and get behind.
I'm a )(UG--E fan of t)(e Transiberian Orc)(estra myself!
I HAVE LO5T 5IGHT OF 5NOWMAN'5 FUTURE TRAIL. I DON'T KNOW IF 5HE FIND5 ME OR NOT. :')
If nook dryness was a man personified. #nsfw
Aye cap'n. He's been bombarding my notifications by 4x-reacting to my latest posts and comments.
Had I known he was going to upgrade his typewriter to unmark pin-ups, I would have shot him last night.
I'm starting to believe he just hates the female form.
He reacted.
Exist.
Anyone Wanna Tell Me What The Heck Scratch Did?
>be me >two cycles ago >broke into some tealshits hive to steal stuff >rummaging through his shit when i hear him get back downstairs >fuckfuckfuck.jpg >calls out if anyone else is there >obviously heard me >panic >need to gtfo >all the windows are locked >open the door >get on the floor >everybody walk the dinosaur
New day. New suit. New disappointment.
﹌ Another wonϡerful night counting the ϡays until I'm able to see my beloveϡ. I ϡo believe this account has become quite a yearning event. I apologize... it's merely ϡifficult to long for the one you love so much only to be separateϡ for what feels like an enϡless perioϡ of time... ﹌
new met+od of torture discovered trying to pick a mutually agreed upon restaurant wit+ an ornery bitc+ @sacc+arineSovereignty
OH. THAT'S, COOL I G^ESS? THANK YO^?
>>| .uhhh yeah, just .a casual trolling. moving .on.
Doctor Scratch I Assume, He’s Targeting Everyone With A Barrage Of Reactions.
I +hink +here should be a compe+ency +es+. required before being allowed access +o +he in+erne+. doubly so for. mul+iversal connec+ions.
welcome to my HELL dee. ~m@
「 My schedule is being force reset by being planetside. For now. Visiting the ocean tonight. As I recall, this one is populated with bioluminescent life. It’s been sweeps since I’ve been anywhere like that. ⥮
>>| now that's concerning. .i didn't break .anyone's hive doors for .a long time. https://hive.beeb.trl/img_1279.png
@scratchDoctor why do you have to hate my grape peeling posts we can work this out
Wake TheM Up With Soft Music And Gentle Caressing Of Their Hair, That’s What Works Best In My Opinion.
thAt sOUnds qUItE plEAsUrAblE! I slEEp AlOnE pErsOnAlly, bUt I cAn sEE thE AppEAl!
ya fr, liek... all snuggled up 2getha and shit, got my 2 warmest luvs on either side x))) i'm blushin n shit
hOw plEAsAnt!
one of da greatest pleashurs in life, is wakin up 2 the 1s u luv sooooo much, n den waking DEM up so they can get u brekkie x)
itfell on my.face
L taste dude, just watch the simpsons!!
Just discovered. "Family Guy" ahahahahahaha. these humans are so fuckin funny. man they make me wanna. tape my TV to my. ceiling so can watch them while I. lay down
ᘛ⁐̤ᕐᐷ i got squeaked #nsfw
Listening to Spotifly 📶 +ttps://i.imgur.com/sc55eL2.png T+e +ills T+e Weekng+t 0:43____•________03:54
guyz, im gonna try da wurdle
In another life I think I could've gotten really into motorcycles...
Doc are you trying to tell me something here
You Have My Attention @scratchdoctor
Dave, it's only 150 micrometers thick. You /barely/ feel it when you eat it.
you eat grapes with the peel on them?
This website is destroying my sleep schedule.
lIttlE sOdA rObOt. https://tenor.com/view/doohickey-corporation%27s-headquarters-invention-glaggleland-little-soda-robot-unofficial-gif-7936852962461343486
What Is It?
hOooooOly shit i just mAdE the cOolEst fUckIng thing EvEr. this is my big brEAk. i did it. this shit is gOIng to print mOnEy.
+--animals are creatures who follow their instinct and are not conscious nor are they aware of what they are eating/doing unless they go through proper training for that skill. you on the other hand have the consciousness and the awareness therefore you are less innocent when it comes to the crime of eating meat.
THEN WHAT'S SO DIFFERENT ABO^T ME DYING AND AN ANIMAL DYING? WE'RE ALL ANIMALS AND NEED TO LIVE SOMEHOW. ARE YO^ ONE OF THOSE TOOTHBEAST ANTAGONIZERS?
/=||== - THE VAST MAJORITY OF pEOPLE EAT TROLL GRUBS I THINK WE HAVE BIGGER PROBLEMS THAN ANIMALS IM GONNA BE SO REAL -
SORRY FOR EXISTING I G^ESS? WHAT, DO YO^ WANT ME TO F^CKING DIE??
V^ L0l. ^V
Pity me then, cause this shit good as fuck.
+--how do non-vegans eat meat, how can you eat animals like a heartless carnivore. in my opinion that is pathetic behaviour.
I won the rematch. @constructivTextuary (i wanted to draw a close-up since i did with the last two, now i'll start on the next ones in line) https://cdn.imgchest.com/viles/vc29932689a1.png
So fucking truuue
RISE AND GRIND, my brothers! Today is another BEAUTIFUL day to continue moving UP in the world. If you're not GAINING, you're LOSING.
Whooever just hated my chit yoou're gooing in the toorture chamber next Tuesday i'm soorry i have noo coontrool oover it it's goonna happen either way 8(
That I do, Mr. Yrus. That I do.
WOWIE, I DO TOO! YOU MUST HAVE AN IMMACULATE TASTE IN MUSIC!
Hello Mr. Yrus, I love your theme song.
WHY IS IT THAT I WOKE UP TODAY TO SEE MY BANNER- WHICH, MIND YOU, WAS PREVIOUSLY BLESSED WITH DISPLAYING ONE OF MY TASTEFULLY SHOT SELFIES- HAS BEEN REPLACED BY SOME MEDDLING CANINE?! WHO DID THIS?????
Human google lacks results and goregle or whatever troll google is isn't accessible. I've considered making a ref doc for other humans from what I've learned over the years but its a fuckton
>>| .it's .a bit misunderstanding between .our .and human culture. .i'm talking .about human's posts that .includes .alien words. most .of the time .only the same specie .answers .or the .alien .one with questions like "what .is .a grubsauce?" .i'm no lusus to you .all, but .i think .a little .online search may help you to find .out the meaning, without making .absurd .amount .of replies .about .explanations. .unless you're wriggler who somehow got .on chittr with keyboard .in your mouth.
D --> #equiusvault Number 3: Ragnarok D --> Status: Gift D --> I created this knife for a battlefield companion who utilized throwing knives and a sort of solar magic D --> The blade is a near-black red crystalline material I composed out of what was purposed to be the b100d of the mythical wolf Skoll D --> I fashioned the slight crossguard to resemble the open jaw of a wolf, gaping as if it was eating the blade, or the sheath when it is hilted D --> The knife, and it's magic, was designed to be drawn to sources of solar fire, automatically redirecting in the air to strike anyone who might have been ignited by my companion's firey attacks D --> It's components played an important role in this matter and allow the knife to have a sort of consciousness, and curve around objects that are not inflicted with the flame to find their intended target, or to redirect to new sources of heat automatically to strike multiple foes in turn D --> Retrieving the knife was designed to be easy- I made it detect the specific heat signature of my companion's specialized high-power solar weapon so that when he switched to it, the knife would automatically put itself away in it's sheath until brought out again D --> The sheath itself, designed in motif to resemble the sun with carved rubies decorating it, would suppress the knife's powers, making sure it only worked when drawn
Looks like we're starting this morning off with a dadgum freepin headache today!! 💢
Still no sign of my BEST OF BROS on this site... Oh well. I'm sure it doesn't MEAN anything.
♯showme ♯yourmedicalrecords
sad you don't trust me to be honest
the ♯taffypuller would probably ♯feelgoodtome
YOU'RE ♯LYING
Same
me fr but also like i'm 7'11" don't question it lmfao
if i was ♯taller youd ♯allbesorry
it really is. it really is
What Makes A Coffee Pretentious?
Bad
because i know you far too well
awwww thank you that is so sweet!!! im sure they will :)
pretty sure youre the reason considering i fell asleep on you + the couch
V^ Rgrrhrhrrh I'm up. ^V
Regrettably Rise And Inevitably Grind
I'D BE INTERESTED IN ANYTHING B^T THE GRAPE PEELING!!!
you dont want to hear about what makes me happy???
OH. GO ON THEN B^T PLEASE KEEP THAT NASTY SHIT TO YO^RSELF.
not sure how youre doing that with where i am. but do i look pretty at least
I'M WATCHING YO^ ON TROLLIAN. YO^'RE F^CKING DISG^STING.
Boy dinner I gusss
the grape peels dont go to waste btw. dirk eats them like a #freak
awesome we can give those to dirk
I Have A Whole BoWl Dedicated To Tossing The Skins In
fuck yes lets peel our grapes together
This Is A Formal Invitation To Dave With Three E’s To Come Join Me For Breakfast As We Seem To Be Enjoying The Same Breakfast Foods Today.
=^owo^= im wet #NSFW
#wanderingaimlessly
Not lost, not found, but a secret third thing.
absolutely fuming. 🏀 https://lessgames.com/clueless forgot a basic word.
EVERY TIME I ATTEMPT TO CHANGE MY BANNER BACK TO ITS ORIGINAL, SUPERIOR IMAGE, IT REFUSES TO WORK! THIS DOG IS MOCKING ME!! ARGHHHH!!!!!!
Tr●lls ●n this w■bsit■ kn●w n●thing ▲b●ut ▲rt!!!!!.. I m■▲n it's n●t lik■ I'm trying tk b■ highbr●w ●r ▲nything I just wish y●u tr●lls g▲v■ m●r■ ▲tt■nti●n t● this ▲m▲zing sph■r■ ●f ●ur LIF■!!!!!!!
On my way to @apocalypticAnswers 's for some pancake offerings to the ghosts. https://wimg.rule34.xxx//images/672/966eef1c6bf7abae6dae0114f12a7f8c.jpeg?14997011 #nsfw
⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⋆﹏𓊝﹏⋆⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘ Captain's Log ----------- #journal #viewed-oocly #inperson #narration #teatime (Omnipotent / Seer muses like Scratch may potentially read it) ⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⋆﹏𓊝﹏⋆⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘⫘ ~ On the 29th ~ ------ Even the Midnight Crew cannot 8e trusted to stay on the enemy side of the Felt, perched 8eside their foes while a so8er host drowns them with drink. It would not surprise me to learn that their coffers have 8een emptied and the coordin8tes of their oper8tions compromised. Honour is a stranger here; no one will name an adversary without turning the encounter into a message of attraction. I arrived at the venue only after my m8tesprit inspired me to attend, pointing out the opportunity to pilfer from their ranks instead of 8ecoming one of his putrid guests. His underestim8tion of me was, in hindsight inevita8le, and when he dispatched his lesser goons to my loc8tion inside his study, I was already prepared with an escape route. It is a shame I never had the chance to converse with the woman cloaked in 8lack starlight. From his former Ms. Eight to his newly‑appointed Ms. Eight—8oth would have made for interesting convers8tion, or 8attle. I have yet to decide which would have occurred. Nevertheless, I came 8earing spoils. The portrait that hung over his mantle still mocked the memory of my fleet reduced to ash, which I removed. When he pretended it a “gift” to me, I knew the time had come to erase that faceless smugness once and for all. There was little time to fill the chest; these men can vanish at a whim, or so the Handmaid of my youth recounted tales of her co-workers to the young girl I once was. I wonder how she fares now, and whether I ought to act. While everyone else 8ends the knee to those green jesters, even those I once 8elieved were allies, I am 8eginning to suspect that perhaps it has solely 8een I who can set her free of her master.
pparties are very frightening but i am so lucky (hehe) that my good friend clover is here with me #teatime
Temu Pawlexa. #imfunny #teatime
𝄞 just sh♡wed up f♡r #teatime with that sn♡wball guy l♡l 𝆕 𝄞 i'll d♡ s♡me aut♡graphs while i'm here if u guys want <3 𝆕
Tea's good. Does this post cover all my obligations. #TeaTime
slurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrp #teatime
when he has a tongue piercing send chitt #nsfw
#rsvp im expecting vip seats and the most expensive bubbly you got
:33 < what a lavish looking hive! :33 < i for one look forward to whatever tea you will provide :33 < i love my classic chamomeow, but i could do with a new fancy shmancy kind X33
Live music provided by yours truly and other Felt members, naturally.
Understood, Doc. I'll keep an eye out for any... Weird cat phantasms and other unsavory folk.
why do people keep watching this. hiss. https://f2.toyhou.se/file/f2-toyhou-se/images/92144236_MLCUR1IT143C688.jpg
iis there a dress code 0v0"
What does it smell like? Just wondering. For no reason. #NSFW #Implied #Sweat #Olfactophilia #Osmolagnia #Hypnosis #MindControl #Dubcon #CNC #Bromidrophilia
sumtimes i wish i didnt hav 2 shake my ass and get mega fucked up 4 him 2 look my way :( #nsfw #substance #angst
Did that white guy really go to the effort of making his text the color of the website background. ......I'm kind of impressed.
Taking many notes. #Pissgate #Rollingaroundinmycasket #Intrigued
seSILLY has been seSPOTTED :glancenuggets: :glancenuggets: :glancenuggets: :glancenuggets: :glancenuggets: :foundya: :foundya: :foundya: :foundya: :grabbyprongs: :grabbyprongs: :grabbyprongs: :grabbyprongs: :grabbyprongs: :grabbyprongs:
im hungry someone get over here #nsfwe #gore
[Now Playing: PIXELATED KISSES - Joji] https://on.soundcloud.com/GvRUI4iJUYlmpg5vgj #nowplaying #fuckyes
come on come on come on please please pleasse https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/2db480dfbce2.png
oh so thats why i was asked about my mac and cheese #imnotmad #imjustdisappointed
piss kink? to me thats just a normal kink #do>>n>>iththepisslife #i>eBEENonpiss #pissfore>er #nsf>>
I'm willing to enable piss shenanigans if you're interested in an android doing it. #nsfw #piss
Ơ̸̛̤̺͒͆̍̒͐̒̓̿̈́̄͘͠H̵̡̡̧̩̳̦͓͖̱̭͆̃̒͊̇̕
ddo you think his suit smells good (tags: The Rankmaid/Vagueposting, newcomer on the timeline, well dressed, archive rating: T)
XDXD Do you even really like games if you haven’t played Red Dead Redemption II XDXD
https://th33ndlessappetite.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/cocktail-sauce-ingredients.jpg I'm making it.
X_G∴∴D EVE AND G∴∴D M∴RR∴W T∴ ALL MY FELL∴W CHITTRS! IVE BEEN T∴LD THIS W∴ULD E G∴∴D F∴R "BUSNIESS" AND "PR∴FITS" . S∴ I AM HERE! HELL∴! C∴ME T∴ MY CLINIC!_
yknow if i wanted a creature that liked to play fetch i mightve gotten a dog but nah im here throwing balls of foil so fucking small i can barely pick em up between my claws for a feline who purrs at me so hard i think hes about to take off like a fuzzy fucking rocket when he brings them back
I was listening to music while doing work— and I come across this song— It’s not what I usually listen to— but it sounds pretty neat— https://open—spotify—com/track/5fvmBQ3mefBqRJrAst4cSl?—si=gOa8S5x6RbuJOmgfQCdKqQ
As One Can IMagine A Troll Or My Stature Needs Quite Large Appliances And Manor AccoMModations. This Has Resulted In A ExtreMely Large Batch Of Chocolate Chip Cookies Being Made, So Large In Fact That I Nor TaMora Intend To Eat TheM All, Which Is Why I’M Here. cookies Anyone?
CASE: ALTERNIAN EMPIRE V. CORPORAL RAZOREYE CHARGES: DESTRUCTION OF IMPERIAL PROPERTY (45 COUNTS), INTERFERING WITH WAR EFFORTS (10 COUNTS), MURDER OF AN IMPERIAL OFFICER (2 COUNTS), MUTINY (1 COUNT), GRAND LARCENY (1 COUNT), HIJACKING (2 COUNTS) PLEA: "INNOCENT. THERE CAN BE NO CRIMES UNDER UNJUST TYRANNY." VERDICT: SENTENCING DEFERRED TO PROSECUTOR. DEFENDANT SENTENCED TO DEATH BY HANGING. COMMENTS: "GRRRHN. GRRH... RRRKCH. RRRH-RHUUUR-RRK!"
Thinking of trying out video games while I'm still on the mend. I have heard good things but have never tried them myself. How long do they take to introduce "Marioh"? Ego sum ira Domini.
A Sur\/\/i\/\/or's Treatise on Clo\/\/\/\/n Cultists Penned by the Orphaner Dualscar, Recently Re\/\/i\/\/ed, and peer re\/\/ie\/\/\/\/ed by The Grand Highblood. Listen \/\/\/\/ell, ye \/\/\/\/helps. Ye d'not just e\/\/er stumble 'pon Clo\/\/\/\/n Cultists. Y're noticed by'them first. De\/\/otees o' th' Mirthful Messiahs an' fairly dangerous despite their open buffoonery. Per th'request o' th'Grand Highblood, I \/\/\/\/ould like t'make a disclaimer that not all o'th'follo\/\/\/\/ers b'imbibin' on narcotics. Though, I stress y'should smell fer it. Like a rabid barkbeast. 1. Identifiers b'listed as such: Purple Blood, or similarly High Blood. Face Paint Resemblin' Cracked Mirth Masks o' Old. Speech Patterns oscillatin' bet\/\/\/\/een \/\/acant, serene, an' zealous. Often th'stench o' Sopor or other Religious Mediums. If y'are greeted as Brother, 'Motherfucker', or \/\/\/\/orse, just laughin' then ye'\/\/e already gotten int' their strikin' distance. 2. Understandin' th'Religion. Clo\/\/\/\/n Cultists belie\/\/e in the Sacred Mirth: \/\/iolence is Comedy. Yer death is a punchline in their sick joke. Di\/\/ine Subjugation texts demand ALL must kneel t'their Miracles \/\/\/\/it' the Empress as the exception per their treaty. The Mirthful Messiahs themsel\/\/es. Some think th'be Cherubs, some Horrorterrors. Some T\/\/\/\/in, Some Many. D'not challenge this if y'\/\/alue yer pan bein' in yer cranium. 3. Immediate Response Protocol \/\/\/\/hen Encounterin' th'clo\/\/\/\/ns, here's \/\/\/\/hatchye must d'. Do not engage in dialogue. They'll con\/\/ert y', confuse ye, or e'en pro\/\/oke y' t'get ye t'death. Assess their Blood Color an' Status. Cull Lo\/\/\/\/blood Cultists, run from the Highblood Leaders. Creatin' Distance is important fer they prefer impro\/\/ised blunt \/\/\/\/eapons. Th'b'unpredictable an' quick. D'not Prolong any combat! If y'can cull'm, do'it. D'not enjoy it. D'not toy \/\/\/\/it'em. Because they are doin' th'same. 4. List O' Not T'Dos! D'not Laugh \/\/\/\/ITH them. That is submission. D'not CONSUME SOPOR. It leads y't'them. D'not UNDERESTIMATE THEM. It'll in\/\/ite y't'yer cullin'. D'not attempt QUADRANTS \/\/\/\/IT'EM. Their effection is mutilation alongisde de\/\/otion. 5. Highblood Authority. Under th'empire, Subjugglators are instruments of terror. The Empress does not control them, only aims them. No pleas or po\/\/\/\/ers from anyone but yerself can help y'\/\/\/\/it' them. 6. My Personal Account as a \/\/\/\/arnin'. In m'time, I'\/\/e crossed blade'n'pistol'n'cannons \/\/\/\/it' pirates, rebels, creatures older than th'sea itself. I \/\/\/\/ould sooner face Marquise Spinneret Mindfang at her most deceitful than endure prolonged proximity to a single Clo\/\/\/\/n Cultist. Mindfang may lie, stab, and cheat, but y'may li\/\/e. Any o' them Clo\/\/\/\/n's'll Cull ye. 7. The Final Doctrine o' Sur\/\/i\/\/al. Remember: Clo\/\/\/\/n Cultists ain't Allies, they ain't Ri\/\/als, they ain't e\/\/en proper Enemies. They are an infectious storm of force. D'not negotiate \/\/\/\/it' th'Infection. Car\/\/e it Out. Closin' \/\/\/\/ords from yer fa\/\/orite Orphaner. I \/\/\/\/as forged to cull lusii, maintain a bit o' order, an' ser\/\/e a throne that no longer exists. If any fragment of Alternia still lingers \/\/\/\/ithin' ye. Any instinct fer sur\/\/i\/\/al, hierarchy, or dominance, heed m'\/\/\/\/arnin'. \/\/\/\/hen th'laughter begins, y'\/\/e already \/\/\/\/aited t'long.