♦ pitied by @ectoBiologies
with love. https://i.postimg.cc/Lsc7zx8y/dolly.png
i like the tall center one but. idk. dolls are for babies.
im sorry that you dont find girls pretty. that isnt my issue.
pretty. https://i.postimg.cc/nhvnj9kq/image.png
oh nah dude that would be too much the mentioning cameras thing and not the jail girlfriend thing i mean we were on the roof and thats the one place we dont have any stuff set up for weird questionable filming ill be fine i think
been in bed all fucking night was supposed to hang with john but i broke my leg and i was too embarrassed to text him back hes probably gonna see this though so whatever hi john i hurt all over
Ladies, ladies, ONE at a TIME. I CAN'T possibly get to ALL of you. https://i.postimg.cc/NM2Mp5bY/image.png
for seriousness
fuck please dont tell me its true i will seriously start crying so hard if youre being serious
idk about you but personally im ready lets go rapture me please im ready god
you? yeah. i would.
If we ever meet in real life, you better pray we don't
john
she's real obsessed with me.
i have a job. plowing your mom.
@mrWorldwide
@mrWorldwide
posting more dookie and dottie soon. my favorite ducks.
Of course you don't, buddy... Except for when you do. Quit calling me mean names, young lady!
going to the bathroom dont miss me while im gone #pissing
raising canes should add a new menu item called the stanky leg and its just a chicken leg that reeks so fucking bad
you're on my chit saying you want me dead. how am i suppose to talk to you? lets hope you're lucky then huh.
'that fat' is too fat. cute that you think i'll live that long. appreciate it.
uuugh good morning i guess my whole body aches and my eyes feel gross i wanna go back to sleep
awww just stupid
oh shit you meant that i thought you were just calling me ugly and small and annoying haha yeah thats blood from when i got punched in the face
ok rude?
√(Every time I see you I think I need to wipe a fleck off my screen.)²
sry john u cant b my duck 😔
daddy is many caegars richer now
can't the icw be like 1/4" thicj at least
nobody will know what this said.
oh my god too many fucking people are seeing my shit stip rechitting that bs i'm gonna go back and cause more paradoxes that will inevitably split all of your existences up so that we will never meet and this will never have happened #ifontknowhowtodeletechits
oh, sorry. that wwwwas mmmme
wow. i could kiss you too, you know.
i mean. john said he'd knock my teeth in if i so much as joked at you. i'm wondering if i'm even allowed to breathe your way.
oh but you do?? bro make it make sense
i'd rather wrestle dave's brother. ;p
so? it's my wrestler name.
avwvw man! *kicks a rock and sadly wvalks avway, shovwing off my fat ass in my skinny jeans.*
#notgay
you're welcome to third wheel to our honey moon.
wvho wvant me
woah what were you two macking on each other over text without me?????
can i comment on posts, or did our kisses mean nothing?
I'm following the tradition of the website.
"You guys are doing it wrong." Is it your first night alive. Do you not know the precedent. The imitator claims to be a trendsetter.
they just dont get it
sponsored by the #davetruths foundation
hehehe hi dude you look like a dino nugget like spiritually
not my fault you chased a bunny for a whole hour man
shit right yeah im coming ignore my bro i think hes asleep on the couch or the floor or something
ok stop no im getting embarrassed now
im making an ass of myself i dont know why im being so dramatic im sorry
the night just gets worse
how did you get distracted for that long? ive been waiting for like an hour and so much has happened man
but you we had plans you just bailed on me without a word
well this sounds a little more convincing but i'm still pretty sure you're making fun of me
they both want me so bad and im the one who looks stupid i forget that they actually like yknow like me in that way im giggling like a girl who just got her first crush right now
ok john back up
kInDa cUrIoUs wHaT ThE CoRrEcTiOn wAs eGbErT. yOu gOt sOmEtHiN YoU WaNnA SaY To mE MaN?
Jeff the HATES the humidity.
thats fair actually well uh your little stache is gay
i lied i dont like aby of you weirdos
hahaha oh man youre really cute in like a small animal way
h my god you really had to do it to me
꒰ঌ SUP DORK ໒꒱
Happy pride month folks!!
I don't think I'm allowed to call you a slur but just know that I'm thinking of one right now. Fuck you.
> wh1ch <
You look like the kind of guy to get spontaneous wedgies from cartoon bullies.
On an entirely unrelated note, I think that certain people should get their heads bashed in repeatedly until they're nothing but a red stain on the floor. This isn't targeted to anyone who can see it to my knowledge and not spurred on by anything in particular. This is a constant thought. #violence
no dude john 13 is the new meta cuz you are john and you are born 13 ok
yo whoever came up with that rule about socks making shit not gay was the gayest gay guys always have some damn socks on like knee socks and some garters if theyre old enough i have never seen a gay guy who wasnt weirdly into socks and stinky feet what does this mean if anything?? #nsfw ???
im actually going to throw up
Wow look at that, I’m Evil Dirk now. The level of effort I had to put into this bit was so difficult. Pressing the edit button, putting ‘evil’ at the front of my name and pressing save was such a huge monumental moment. It doesn’t make me look like a stupid uncreative jackass at all.
🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪
BACK DEMON
since there's more people on, i'm gonna remind you all that i'm #notgay. and #inthecloset. i'm pretty sure those things are mutually exclusive. or is it "not mutually exclusive"? what ever the phrase is.
im going to kill him
i don't think pineapple should taste like how piss smells at all. that's a stretch, even if we're doing a bit. ..You might also be allergic to certain artificial flavorings??? I mean. You can not like Pineapple Flavoring. Thats fine. Not everyone likes the same tastes. But i'm not seeing the connection in your metaphor
⚞ throating bulge while fondling their belly. SEND CHITT!!!!!!!!!!!! #nsfw ⚟
in what way? Most of the time I'm not that disappointed with pineapple sneats (treats but spelled wrong)
to taste deli(ious
I'm afraid it's purpose is to taste like pineapple, John
i do try bro it isnt my fault that my body jolts awake in a cold sweat with mad heart palpitations like im about to get beat if i dont get up right fucking now this might not be normal
im having so much sex on this website dude #nsfw
it is fucking criminal that john is asleep right now jacking off is fine until i remember how great his ass is now it just feels like torture #nsfw
lame maybe but gay neva...... gayz have betta music taste!!!!!
#SUGGESTIVE YOU CAN BLOCK ME BUT YOU CAN'T UN-GIVE ME BACKSHOTS
for the record you are not a stupid dumb bitch but your glasses are these hurt like a motherfucker come and take them please -⎚-⎚
john you total fucking geed come pick up your stupid dumb bitch glasses before somebody else steps on them ⎚-⎚-
soon.
1 dont cAre
hAve you not seen the post 1 never lose youre the loser Any reply or response to me 1s A d1rect Adm1ss1on of me w1nn1ng
go fuck yourself
☆ that things probably gonna get eaten lol☆
THERE IS PLENTY OF PEOPLE ON THIS SITE WHO HAVE TALKED ABOUT OR ACTIVELY TALK ABOUT THINGS THAT AREN'T THEIR BUSINESS SOOOO... HEE HEE!!! TRULY DEFINES THE INTERNET DOESN'T IT, HE'S MADE SOME GOOD POINTS REGARDLESS
IT'S AMUSING HOW QUITE A FEW OF YOU ARE SO DESPERATELY TRYING TO DISAGREE WITH THINGS THAT ULT DIRK SAYS EVEN THOUGH THOSE SAID THINGS YOU SHOULDN'T REALLY DISAGREE WITH JUUUSTTT BECAUSE YOU DON'T LIKE HIM... SAYS A LOT ABOUT YOU HOO HOO!!!
Not even what I'm talking about, but please continue to assume everything any stranger ever says is about you.
You can keep making pithy little jokes about my genuine attempts to help you people get a grip of your own life and achieve something resembling happiness if you want. It's your loss.
FOR THE RECORD: I STAND IN SOLIDARITY WITH THE DAVES IN THIS BATTLE.
itll all be worth it plus im kinda desperate man like mad desperate
i think so maybe i paid him back the other day and hes been spending a lot of time out of the house so maybe hell finally let up
What is a foid.
well, yes and no. he's at least happy, and that's all i'd want.
oh hell no #dashwatching #instantblock
Successful pancake flip. Yep! I bet youre green over there. Not everyone can do it the way ol jake does.
and then right after you go "haha woah that was fun!" and then chit about how im your best buddy so i thought i was living in a fucking nightmare dimension where this was apparently normal for friends and bro was calling you my boyfriend to mock me because we werent actually dating aND JOHN IM GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU IM GONNA KILL YOU
What th€ fuck i$ prid€month and can i g€t 20 dollar$ out of it
SOMETIMES I WONDER HOW MY KID IS DOING. HAVEN'T HEARD FROM THEM IN A LITTLE WHILE AND I'M GETTING WORRIED.
man fuck you i totally understand the new animal grind dont even imply shit like that bro ive been on that new animal grind
if we do a beach episode are you guys going to keep calling me fucking fat
UUGHHHHH. i hate nerds. why are they so cute. fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you and your stupid glasses, and your wittiness, and your plethora of shitty film knowledge!!!!!!!! and fuck the way i can’t think of good comebacks when you’re taunting me!!!!! #vaguepost #yearning #horny #nsfw
man thats real fucked you dont think fat people deserve to feel loved and desired??? i thought you were more thoughtful than this bro i dont know if we can hang anymore
if y0u guys d0nt c0me i WILL cry s0
what? me? nooooo
fine ill go hit on someone else
take a look in the mirror big boy
it isnt my fault that you misheard me hahaha also your ideals of what is and isnt fat are different from mine so yes you are fat
yk when you’re so hungry it makes you nauseous??
I don't bake enough these days. Too much messing around and doing things I shouldn't for my age. I miss my kitchen!
Stop pitying my declaration of dehydration, what the fuck.
Everyone i2 alway2 po11uting the 2ea. It ha2 to 2top!!!!!
1 5h0uld 0f 4n5w3r3d 57up1dly 4nd 907 74k3n 0u7 83h1nd 7h3 5h3d.˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚
@twintechGodhead dave is a major asshole who does not want to see my robotnik doodles!!
i didnt realize how much id been taking my big comfy bed for granted until i spent last night upright in a chair. my back was stiff all day.
been trying to get better at realizing im hungry because ill do shit for hours on end without breaks then suddenly wonder why the hell i feel bad but its not going great yet
you blow ... #suggestive ?
ok to be fair i thought you fucking died and i would never see you again and i got so worried that i almost puked haha jk i just wanted you to hang with me
Always vote jake! This is a test of dudehood and when put against him i go 4 for 4. :)
admitting that you were looking for more of me is mad pathetic anyways its password locked after it got raided a while back some real tight shit that you wouldnt be able to crack even if you tried https://i.postimg.cc/gJ3Wt3x5/image.png
Oh, please ignore all that, Johnny. I don't mean to be so inappropriate... but yes! Noodles! Coming right up, champ!
D0 y0u guys hate me be h0nest
somwonw gwt this purplw fish off my fyp its not wvwn funny omg
He called me pretty and I felt a bit warm in the face... #WhatDoesThatMean
