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Pickup DaVwinci
This user wrote the book on being a sleaze! #cagttl #nsfwv
Amporacoin
This user is still holding Amporacoin. Line go ♒︎ #TOTHEMOONS #ERIDANWEEK
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Knotty
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@aeneasCaldarium[AC]

alright. wvriska vwon. sorry damz. i wvas rooting for you, i really wvas. novw. her imperious condescension vwersus rose lalonde. iwve got something real special for you all. took some bartering, some vwheeling and dealing, thats vwhy it took me a sec to get back to this. lemme start wvith the rose propaganda. beautiful blonde, knowvs howv to banter, perfect bod, perfect face, can do some spooky eldritch stuff if thats vwhat youre into. shes incredible. i dont wvanna undersell her here. but... i got a vwintage from my man @caligulaascendit. this is *art*. nowv, to share the scan, he said he vwanted to do the propaganda for her, so here you go. #nsfwv. #nsfc too, but not the c youre thinking of. "its ya boy eridan ampora here vwith a guest rewvievw on alternias biggest caked up baddie our leadin broad in the beam for #cronusbabeoff hovwre all likin my vwintage hic edition penthouse by the wvay pretty groowvy huh cost me a pretty caegar but it wvas totally wvorth it an yknowv its the real deal too cause its got her signature shade a coral pink semi gloss #2 stamped across the covwer wvhen im feelin advwenturous i take my condy penthivwe out a her plastic slip an ewver so gently stroke her lipstick mark vwith a quivwerin finger wvith my other flipper placed firmly against my crotch anyvway im afraid the competition has been crushed by the empresss unholy cake grinder the rest a you booty impaired ladies can go hivwe novw" yeah. yowvza. #cwv-cakesitting. <3 or <> for condy. <3< or c3< for rosie.

Kult: +232
Kull: +189
Total: 421
Ratio: 1.23
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Pickup DaVwinci
This user wrote the book on being a sleaze! #cagttl #nsfwv
Amporacoin
This user is still holding Amporacoin. Line go ♒︎ #TOTHEMOONS #ERIDANWEEK
Pitch Hearted
A truly reviled user.
Knotty
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@aeneasCaldarium[AC]

im calling it, i dont really care. condy wvins, lamplady doesnt movwe on. sorry toots, youre hot and all, but i wvant the *real* stars competing here. speaking of... god damn. this one hurts. the final match of round 2 in the #cronusbabeoff is... rose lalonde vws kanaya maryam. this ones gotta sting. most of the rosies and kannys iwve seen around this place are divworced, dunno if ivwe seen ewven one happy couple, but this has still gotta be a vweird one. i wvas a lil spoiled for choice for propaganda, so i wvent a lil softer on this one. still #nsfwv, of course. <3 or <> for kanaya <3< or c3< for rose

Kult: +69
Kull: +250
Total: 319
Ratio: 0.28
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Pickup DaVwinci
This user wrote the book on being a sleaze! #cagttl #nsfwv
Amporacoin
This user is still holding Amporacoin. Line go ♒︎ #TOTHEMOONS #ERIDANWEEK
Pitch Hearted
A truly reviled user.
Knotty
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@aeneasCaldarium[AC]

wvell its confirmed: the crockercorp pr machine hates rustbloods. someone go cancel janey or something. there vwas a good turn out for aradia, including by the wveird vwhite guy himself, but it just vwasnt enough. jane movwes on! sorry rae rae. up next, the handmaid, the demoness, the scariest bitch on alternia, up against the heiress, the wvitch, the svweetest lil thing on alternia, feferi peixes! this propaganda is also #nsfwv for real. wvote belovw, vwhos hot, wvhos not? #cronusbabeoff <3 or <> for feferi <3< or c3< for the handmaid

Kult: +96
Kull: +190
Total: 286
Ratio: 0.51

hey what’s up guys here like i literally am am making my first like post on apparently the honestly fucking canserous like website, like looks like like u like fuckers will honestly finally literally get the honestly premium content u deserve. make sure literally to hit that bell and follow for like more.

Kult: +225
Kull: +210
Total: 435
Ratio: 1.07
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𝐸𝓃𝑔𝓁𝒾𝓈𝒽'𝓈 𝒞𝒽𝑜𝓈𝑒𝓃
𝓞𝓷𝓮 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓮𝓵𝓮𝓬𝓽 𝓯𝓮𝔀 𝓲𝓷 𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓼𝓮𝓻𝓿𝓲𝓬𝓮.
Pitch Hearted
A truly reviled user.
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@handMaid[HM]

YOU SHOULD SEE WHAT HAPPENED TO THE LAST BITCH. WHO FAILED TO MEET HER #WORKPOSTING QUOTA. @TERRIBLEFATE

Kult: +230
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Total: 433
Ratio: 1.13
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

Quite so. If they wvant it so bad they should say it wvith their chest. That vway they might havwe chance.

Kult: +5
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Total: 12
Ratio: 0.71
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

Another... question? From: "I dare not say". Covward. Anonymous asks: "PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE" Get a hold of yourself, truly it is pathetic to see someone beg like this and not hawve the shameglobes to state their name vwith their chest. If you truly did mean this, you vwould leawve your name. That at least givwes you a chance at a ride.

Kult: +14
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Total: 21
Ratio: 2.00
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

These are really coming in tonight. Another question. Anonymous asks: "soooo…DO YOU KNOVW ANY FANCY SPELLS?! You’re like a cool magic vwizard!! Or something! Thats vwhat other people told me ☆wv☆" No. I do not knovw any silly spells. Magic does not exist. I am an Orphaner. not a vwizard.

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Kull: +7
Total: 14
Ratio: 1.00
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

Threatening me novw? Hah! Pitiful.

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@commandingAuthority[CA]

Novw wve're talking. If you wvant a chance you need to be vwicious. Novw wvhy should I care about some hemo-anonymous gal on the information superhighwvay?

Kult: +5
Kull: +7
Total: 12
Ratio: 0.71
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

It'll take a bit more than a "yoink" for me to tear up. C'mon, shovw some teeth bitch.

Kull: +12
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

Please, howv wvould you do that?

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@commandingAuthority[CA]

VWith a sea dvweller age is nearly subjectiwve. I am old, ancient some may say. I wvould not consider myself sad.

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Kull: +12
Total: 19
Ratio: 0.58
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

Anonymous asks: "I agree that the shameless brovwn nosing from earlier wvas indeed hard to read. On that note hovw does one take a sail on your ships so to speak." Dm me.

Kult: +5
Kull: +7
Total: 12
Ratio: 0.71
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

You indigos wvhere made to serwve. It is a pity it is frovwned upon to havwe slawves that high.

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Total: 21
Ratio: 0.50
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

Yes wvhatewver. You should stay beneath me, hovw about you lick my boots?

Kull: +7
Total: 7
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

Good, you knovw your place, scum.

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@commandingAuthority[CA]

I hawve reciewved more questions, all in quick succession so instead i vwill ansvwer them all in one post, as none of those that submitted vwhere brawve enough to stand by it. 1. "8=D < I vwant you." You knowv wvhere to find me. Do not be a covward, my Priwvate messages are open. I am alwvays open for a chat. 2. "is it cool if i ask you, politely, to string me up and dig burns into my flesh." Absolutely dear. It wvould be quite the pleasure to sear your flesh. If this is your ask, you knowv vwhere to find me. I am alvways wvilling to brand another. If the subject is wvilling, it is evwen better to break their eager spirit. 3. "you could orphan any of my grubs dualscar hooooly shit" I am not quite sure wvhat one may mean by this. Do you wvant for us to produce grubs and for me to abandon said grubs? I am sure to havwe done plenty of that already. Or do you mean for me to kill you, and leavwe your grubs as orphans? It is quite the confusing question dear. Stand by it, don't be a covward. 4. "I gotta admit I'm impressed at howv you'wve gotten trolls literally fighting to be your ash tray. Credit wvhere credit is due you knowv hovw to rope them in." It is quite impressiwve howv they lap at my coattails wvishing for me to snuff out my cigar on their tongue or their skin. I havwe plenty of cigars to go around you see, and it seems that I am quite desirable. I do not blame them of course, a hot vwiolet stud like myself is attractivwe to lowv bloods. They all wvant a taste of these gills. You givwe them a little hope, a snog, let them kiss lick your boots, choke on your bulge and the scum is loyal for life. They think you are givwing them some special treatment but darling it is just another Tuesday light for me.

Kult: +5
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Total: 17
Ratio: 0.42
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

VWery vwell, let him hate. I do not care. Unfortunate you must let me dowvn.

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@commandingAuthority[CA]

You are lucky to hawve caught me in a good mood. WVhere I feeling more vwicious I may havwe berated you harder.

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Total: 12
Ratio: 0.71
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

Thank you for notifying me. Dispose of him.

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@commandingAuthority[CA]

I am not playing wvith anything, dear Handmaid.

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Total: 21
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

Is that so bad? It showvs they are wvorking hard, it's admirable.

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Total: 19
Ratio: 0.58
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@commandingAuthority[CA]

Quite the sight to vwatch the moons crest the horizon on a wvarm evwening. I lovwe the smell of hardvworking men in the morning. [[Edit by @handMaid]]

Kult: +210
Kull: +175
Total: 385
Ratio: 1.20
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Ashen One
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@tautologicalTechnique[TT]

『ADVENTERROR'S FIELD GUIDE - PORTED FROM SWATTPAD @tautologicalTechnique 』 『 𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆: DUBCON PALE, CRINGE CULTURE, META FICTION, SELF INSERT, PLATONIC PALING, GAMING ADJACENT, AUTHORIAL INSERT, SPECIES BENDING, SECOND PERSON PERSPECTIVE, YCH, Y/C, UNREALITY, TOUCHING, SPORADIC PALE RUBBING, PALE AFFECTION, POLYQUANDARY (CONSENTED), GYGAAX X EVERYONE, YES THAT EVEN MEANS Y/C』 GYGAAX x KRYQUS // PALESHIPPING // FRIENDFICTION // CAVERNS 'N CULLBEASTS CAMPAIGN // SFW // MOIRAIL MULTICLASS // BOUND BY THE BOUND BOOK // @naughtyTechnician // @zebraDad ☆゚.・。゚☆゚.・。゚☆☆゚.・。゚☆゚.・。゚☆☆゚.・。゚☆゚.・。゚☆☆゚.・。゚☆゚.・。゚☆☆゚.・。゚☆゚.・。゚☆ ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < AUTHOR'S NOTE...mmffmm. Sorry for the delay this chapter!!! One of my moirails of four sweeps got caught up in a particularly nasty encounter with a Cullbeast of Unreasonable Hit Dice! Oh noooo!!! Somebody's gonna be out of combat fer more than one short rest!!! But...onto the fic!!! ( Ꮚ❖ꈊ❖Ꮚ); < The Caverns 'n Cullbeasts session shoulda wrapped hours ago...what in tarnation were the lot of 'em still doin' here...? These two ain't had grounds t'yammer 'n yap beyond stats 'n th'doling out 'o treasures accumulated...'n that took place hours ago!!! It took only a scant few moments more fer it t'really click with KRYQUS what this was even about...'n the thought still got dismissed with chudly indifference. Sensation overrode sensibility somethin' sorely suggestive...somethin' deeper...somethin'... ᴗ(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ) < Pale. ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < KRYQUS's trembling hands passed over the character sheet in metered measures...examining for errors, miscalculations, even just a rounding error in carry weight that could set his party back some...He was always like this. Thinkin' 'o others in tiny, invisible ways that made 'm irresistible to anyone with eyes 'n the time t'use 'em. Y/C can't help but buckle back a little as KRYQUS suddenly seizes Y/C's pencil 'n tugs it forward tighter than a nat twenty on an athletics check that he'd piledrive into th'enemy's inferior armor class...the clamp continued, as he started to...sink to ganderglobe level. The EMINENT INDIGOD OF INDIGOCELS who once towered like a one troll rovin' rules lawyer on hoofback now ain't no more than a troll, his imposing sourcebooks gone from a monument to a frame. ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < my character died ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < damn ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < toooo bad the same cannoot be said of climate change or casteism or peoople who talk shit and doont get hit ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < oor any oof the woorlds oother many wooes ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < but i can oonly doo ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < soo much ✧( Ꮚ─_ ─Ꮚ) < as a fat fuckin chud of hooned discipline ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < eventually ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < woorlds gootta save itself ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < oor perish unwoorthy ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < KRYQUS becomes a livin' study in humility. His words underpin the lessons endowed to him by ZEBRADAD. A lodestar. A northern light. The honing beacon 'o morality and th'straight 'n narrow. But his actions. His nonchalance. His utter unquestionably sheer un-fuck-withable energy...this becomes the mantle 'o kingly might he assumes at all times. This becomes th'monarchic tradition passed down from KRYQUS to KRYQUS every few hundred sweeps, so long as he's still around. ( Ꮚ❖ꈊ❖Ꮚ); <> <> <> <> JUST LIKE Y/C wouldn't all that mind bein'!!!!! EH? EH? EH? #FOREVERANDEVER #BUTACTUALLY #YCxKRYQUS #YOU+GOT+ZEBRADADS+BLESSING (ᗜᏊಠꈊಠᏊ)¤=[]:::::> Y/C felt inclined t'dispense comfort. There was a possessiveness t'the way Y/C saw KRYQUS cradle the character sheet in his palms. His broad shoulders cinched up like he dreaded th'thought of loosenin' a grip on this concept fer even a moment...but he put on a brave face just fer you. It wouldn't be right t'just let his happiness slip away. And read between the lines a daggum minute, world's gotta save itself or perish unworthy? That's QUITTER TALK! GLOBAL QUITTER TALK! DOOMSDAY QUITTER TALK! Kryqus feels THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD on his bulky sturdy rock steady shoulders right now! ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < Just as Y/C up 'n worked th'courage t'confront his hands, improperly conspirin' t'mount a charge across yer thigh...Kryqus scoffs in indignation. He sees through yer transparent advances...and retreats strategically. All prompt-like. ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < tsk ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < doont attempt to knoow me ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < im way toooo cooool foor yoou ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < and even if i didnt mean that ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < yoou proobably shoouldnt @ me irl ᴗ(ᴗᏊᄒꈊᄒᏊ) < Uh oh! That got outta hand way fast...maybe it's time t'call fer... ( Ꮚ❖ꈊ❖Ꮚ); <> <> <> <> REINFORCEMENTS!!!!!!! ᴗ(ᴗᏊ❖ꈊ❖Ꮚ); <> <> <> <> My -- I mean Gygaax's hands start t'alternate between (#polyquandary anyone???) petting the tops 'o both 'o yer heads...!!! Soft. Rhythmic little circles. My --- Gygaax's cartilage nubs unfurl from the tightly white knuckled meat mallet into a far more approachable set 'o chitinous diggers with a piercingly pale quality...!!! Both Y/C and KRYQUS are treated t'the soft enmeshed interplay 'o palmin' play 'n no strings attached emotional intervention...c-consensually! We can stop at any time. Y/C j...just could use this! A-as could KRYQUS. To uh. CAVERNS 'N CULLBEASTS t'gether... ( Ꮚ‾̀ꈊ ‾̀Ꮚ); < "...Now, KRYQUS," Gygaax began, "Ewe can't be so harsh on Y/C...they've been through a lot. For our sake. For the CAMPAIGN. If anything were to happen to them...it would be on us to see to it they're protected and retrieved. Same as any PARTY MEMBER. Gentler hands should stir these waters. A SHEPHURT should tend 'n mend to its flock." If the two hands mussyin' up Y/C's body in tandem with KRYQUS wasn't BAaaaaaaAAAAAAd enough...a rovin' set of author-emblazoned fingertips were caressin' th'top of yer horns now. Pickin' out stray imaginary somethin somethins. Stalling. ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < Suddenly, the rush of hot breath excites the air...populates it with the powerful gale phrasings of KRYQUS... ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < gygaax ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < what the actual fuck ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < are yoou trying to say i proovide subpar care to Y/C ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < i literally carried this campaign ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < coomplaintlessly ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < Y/C with it ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < i resent the fuck oout of that implication ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < i coould easily be gentler with this ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < weaving lazy river ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < if i wanted to ( Ꮚ‾̀ꈊ ‾̀Ꮚ); < GYGAAX laughed. "Ewe could stand to be, KRYQUS. Yes. Just LOOK at Y/C. How can ewe say even a single solitary mean thing about that there cutie patootie?!" Tuggin' yer face into an awaitin' set 'o authorial brasserie, th'royal menagerie incidentally pits ya right in line with a EMINENT INDIGOD OF INDIGOCELS'S dice bag as th'aforementioned storms back onto his feet, now a monolith again. KRYQUS approaches our hug slowly. But not neverly. His arms hover over you. The river is still. Th'air itself thickens and compresses about yer skull, 'n horns, hardly blanketed by th'hoofbeast-scented torso cheekily just behind yonder... ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < what fucking ever ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < here yoou go lil guy ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < lap it up ✧( Ꮚ¬_ ¬Ꮚ) < <> ( Ꮚ⚀ꈊ⚀Ꮚ) < GYGAAX's hands tug around ya like a vanguard against harm. KRYQUS goes back t'bein his usual self...a monument of offended pride...he hugs you. And. Uh oh!!! Y/C feels a scraping sensation...nails possessively curled about one side 'o yer head, just at the barest nuggatory base of the horns (so embarassin'n!!!) and tracin' back towards th'scalp...no matter where ya look...t'KRYQUS or t'GYGAAX...both are complicit!!! A boilin' sort 'o affection wellin' up with intent t'pale, RIGHT ON TOP OF Y/C!!!!! (P1/P??) #SWATTPAD #Vacillation #PaleMoirail #TheWholeParty #FullCampaign #NotEnoughInventorySpace #SFW #YouAreOverencumbered!!! #XReader #FriendFiction #CnC #CavernsAndCullbeasts #KRYQUS #ImpliedAU #GYGAAXxKRYQUS #PALEMULTICLASS #AdventerrorsFieldGuide #CrossPosting #ScrawlThoughts #Drabbles #DubconPale #Polyquandary #TeamChud #GygaaxXEveryone #Palewhoring

Kult: +270
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Total: 445
Ratio: 1.54

}(]]]]]) < let's all hear five biǦ booms for this fool > ([[[[[){ }(]]]]]) < #ǦuzmoǦǦed > ([[[[[){ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/1b08ab7bbcaa.j₽eǦ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/09febc8f8f90.j₽eǦ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/a17262a5c358.j₽eǦ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/5b169c884009.j₽eǦ htt₽s://cdn.imǦchest.com/files/fb32cd10ea64.j₽eǦ

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𝐸𝓃𝑔𝓁𝒾𝓈𝒽'𝓈 𝒞𝒽𝑜𝓈𝑒𝓃
𝓞𝓷𝓮 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓮𝓵𝓮𝓬𝓽 𝓯𝓮𝔀 𝓲𝓷 𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓼𝓮𝓻𝓿𝓲𝓬𝓮.
NEVER CAuGHT LACKING LACKEY.
THIS uSER. LACKS NOTHING.
Illumimenati
⬆️👤🗣️👥🛐🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇪🇳✨🔠.
xx_LAWL_xD_xx
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This user has Chittr Gold™! Did they seriously pay for this? What a chump.
@carbolicGalvanologist[CG]

Continuing the history of Uesugi Karkat from his courtesan era: The life of a courtesan had educated the Akatsuki in language, poetry, refinement, and performance before a small audience. The next chapter of his life would prepare him to perform in front of a large one. Chosen for youth, beauty, and the type of androgynous features that can be easily slanted towards femininity with a little cosmetic prestidigitation, the life of an ONNAGATA — a Grubuki actor who plays predominantly feminine roles — afforded the troll who would become Uesugi Karkat tremendous fame, recognition, and inordinate wealth for a commoner of foreign hatching. As a former Boiran, the Onnagata had already learned how to wear the feminine grace of a courtesan like a costume in the theater of the Trollshiwara red light district. It was for this reason that he was scouted to play one of the most prestigious roles in any Grubuki play — the leading female role of Aggaei Makkie in the play "The Florastalk of Troll Edo" — for which the character, a commanding, fiercely loyal, and deeply passionate high-ranking courtesan, spurns a wealthy, but abusive highblood customer to protect her quadmate in one of the most famous monologues of scathing, acerbic, pitch-black venom ever recited in Grubuki theatre — the AKKUTTAI. It was for channeling this performance with such peerless vitriol that Uesugi Karkat became one of the most famous Onnagatas of the Troll Edo period. Naturally, the life of a Grubuki actor means constant pressure. Rehearsal, training, perfection of one's craft. Many onnagata of the time preferred to live their craft vicariously at all times, adopting a female persona through which to hone their "method" in everyday life. This was not the case for Uesugi Karkat, who shed his many-colored persona when off the stage to don nondescript gray robes whenever possible. Yet the constant pressure of life in a Grubuki theatre troupe and his ability to navigate it with grace made him both a leader among his fellow actors and something of a popular figure with the stagehands who he commiserated with in the wings. It was from these stagehands, many of whom were well-versed in the art of securing props with ropes, fastening theatrical rigging, and tying elaborate, functional knots, that the famed Onnagata would learn one final skill from the world of the theatre — one that would lead to his secret life as the NAWASHII. More of Uesugi Karkat's history to come in the following chitts. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/ee6014bb70e8.png #uesugikarkat

Kult: +200
Kull: +175
Total: 375
Ratio: 1.14
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This user officially supports Yuri.
h0m0sexual
there's a l0t 0f ways t0 be gay, including being this user.
Knotty
This user appropriately tagged their NSFW. Nice.
@fuchsiaRuler[FR]

Your name is MEENAH PEIXES and god damn do you fucking RULE. Most trolls already know WHO YOU ARE, but for the sake of the STUPID and LAME, you will INTRODUCE YOURSELF. Whenever you GET AROUND TO IT, at least. You are the THIEF OF LIFE, something that came very handy when you decided to KRILL ALL YOUR TEAMMATES in your own session. But that was an INFINITE SWEEPS ago, it's old news, and you've CHILLED OUT considerably since being revived and living on Earth C, at least compared to how you were before, but you still have a penchant for outbursts of EXTREME VIOLENCE. Your style of URBAN STREETWEAR despite your royal upbringing pairs perfectly with your RUTHLESSNESS and how unbelievably fucking AWESOME you are. You're the BADDEST BITCH this side of the universe, and everyone knows it. You like FORKING BEACHES with your TRIDENT, and making codpious amounts of FISH PUNS. You also have a thing for RAPPING and are really quite good at it, frequently having rap battles with CLOWNS and humans named DAVE when you aren't AMASSING HOARDS OF TREASURE AND CASH. You just realized that you accidentally did INTRODUCE YOURSELF whilst going on about HOW COOL YOU ARE and will stop now. —————————— #suggestive 🎨: @itsjustfamin on Twitter https://file.garden/af4YHN5k7hvjshDs/Screenshot_20260527-071249.png

Kult: +52
Kull: +7
Total: 59
Ratio: 7.43
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transgender
love yourself
@adiosToreador[AT]

i THINK THIS IS PROBABLY, tHE MOST MATURE TAKE, aND i WILL ACCEPT THIS,

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This user recognizes #RankBait posts (im)piously.
Fujoshi Pride
A truly rotten girl!
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An elected official of the Party of Earth-C'S Alliance for Citizen Empowerment
Pitch Hearted
A truly reviled user.
@archiveAddict[AA]

#jakedirk kudos!

Kult: +19
Kull: +19
Total: 38
Ratio: 1.00

𝙌𝙐𝙀𝙎𝙏 𝙁𝘼𝙄𝙇𝙀𝘿

Kult: +7
Kull: +7
Total: 14
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Pickup DaVwinci
This user wrote the book on being a sleaze! #cagttl #nsfwv
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This user is still holding Amporacoin. Line go ♒︎ #TOTHEMOONS #ERIDANWEEK
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@aeneasCaldarium[AC]

cronus amporas guide to the ladies part 1: rose lalonde #nsfwv #nsfvwe #substance #dubcon #cagttl first in my kinda arbitrary order is rose lalonde, rosie, blondie, cutest babe to evwer scovwl at me. trunkbeast in the block, yeah youre gonna need one into dudes, but thats more common that youd think. wveirdly more common than some of the other gals into gals, ewven. second point of order, roses are freaks. ewvery single one, iwve newver met one that isnt. this means that youvwe got an in, but not necessarily an easy one. youvwe gotta prowve to her that you can provwide wvhat her owvn fucked up pan vwants. usually this means dealing wvith her lusus issues. she wvants a masculine figure to giwve control to so that she can pretend like she isnt messed up about mommy. her loss is your gain. theyre also usually drinking too much of the seer juice, so doing stuff they vwouldnt expect is a good in. that or shes drinking the soporifics, dont see this one super often, but the vway to take advwantage of that is obwvious. wvhatewver it is, just position yourself as someone she can giwve control to. a fawvorite line of mine is "wvhos gonna believwe me anyvways?" my personal fawvorite is the "oh no please dont" style rose. this is the one that showvs off wvhat shes got, puts herself into situations, but acts frosty anywvays. think of her like a meovwbeast. you cant come on too quick, you gotta let her come to you, figure out vwhat she wvants. a good compliment vwill usually set her off in the right wvay, preferably something crass as possible to immediately get her off-balance. tits or ass wvorks, though some vwont be impressed by that, so get creatiwve! once youwve got her on the defensiwve you can figure out vwhat her thing is. does she get off to the shame of being seen around a dude like you? do her knees go vweak at the idea of taking orders? cant handle some trollhandling? shell hiss and scratch a little, but keep up the pressure and shell crack. shell get all blushy evwen as she snarks, and shell call you a creep but she wvont stop you. these ones lowve getting taken somewvhere priwvate to "chevw you out" wvhen really they just wvant an excuse to giwve you the chance to feel em up evwen more obwviously. then youwve got the magic dabblers. magic is fake as hell, obvwiously, i think vwhat they technically do is majykks or howvevwer you spell it. doesnt matter. these ones are bored as hell and theyre wvilling to make it just about anyones, uhh... the opposite of a problem. you see a rose thinking about testing a spell from some spooky tome on herself, encourage it, shes one of these. if they can find some excuse to giwve you the reins, they wvill. find a vway to justify your ovwn magical acumen. these are usually the type wvho wvanna givwe up control, wvanna stop thinking, so take charge and giwve that to em. i think if you leawve any rose alone vwith an esoteric tome long enough she becomes one of these, so go for it if thats vwhat youre into. if youvwe got a rose vwho doesnt seem to fall into either category, but youre sure she could like dudes, then you gotta mold her yourself. make jabs at her competence, emphasize hovw easy it is for you to push her around physically, make her feel small. shell push back, but youre prodding at stuff shes already thinking about herself. shell nevwer accept you as her equal so you gotta tear her dovwn until shes about to implode, then offer yourself as a shoulder to cry on. a confidante. she can trust you, vwho wvould you tell, vwho wvould believwe you? then you make your mowve. make her feel useful, use her, make her think that givwing you her body is just as good as wvovwing you wvith her mind. you gotta be her rock. the genetic predisposition to soporifics abuse is a great help here. shes used to feeling this wvay, ewven if she cant admit it, you gotta make it feel good. make her associate this state vwith pleasure, wvith you. if you can do that, youvwe got her in the palm of your hand. alright, time for the rating bod: roses havwe a lotta wvariance, ivwe seen em scrawvny and iwve seen em curvwy as hell. bonus points for being blonde and making the best faces vwhen theyre mad. 8/10 vwariety: 9/10 you can get a rose for just about any mood you might havwe, but theyll usually act grumpy about it ease: you gotta wvork a little bit to make a rose put out, but theyre usually entertaining enough its not frustrating. 6/10 personality: i lovwe em for their rambling, makes for fun banter, but i can see hovw itd put some people off. the ice queen schtick really does it for me those 7/10 ovwerall? ten outta ten babes, cant complain. im alwvays happy to see a nevw rosie in the bubbles and figure out her deal. usually her deal ends up being an unhealthy obsession vwith xeno-biology

Kult: +33
Kull: +476
Total: 509
Ratio: 0.07

one like and i'll release the lyrics of my latest song.

Kult: +7
Kull: +22
Total: 29
Ratio: 0.32
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@gutsyGumshoe[GG]

An unnamed individual, unrelated to any #masquerade event taking place. Part trois. https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/69c71ccb275b.png

Kult: +329
Kull: +143
Total: 472
Ratio: 2.30

Your name is HILDAH THUBAN. God DAMN do you love your job. Even amongst your ELITELY mirthful peers, you are a CHAMPION of SUBJUGGLATION and a DECORATED RINGMASTER of your own tent in the Dark Carnival. You are the CHOSEN HEROINE of the mythical dragon RESHIRAM, and with the blazing blue flare of TRUTH behind your ROTATING BIZARSENAL, there is nothing that any SCUMSUCKING IDEALIST GUTTERBLOOD can do to stop you. From your spiraling tower, you help to maintain the peace of your assigned colony, POMON. Unless you're in the mood to disturb it, which is as OCCASIONAL as it is your MOTHERFUCKING BIRTHRIGHT. You like to engage in the cultural zeitgeist that dominates your planet's professional, recreational, and economical spheres, FIDUSPAWN; you are as formidable of a beast on the MAKE-BELIEVE BATTLEFIELD as you are on the REAL ONE. The WARRIOR'S BURDEN also follows you home when you aren't at work or at play, forcing you into nightly WRANGLING SESSIONS between YOURSELF, your FIERY, OVERBOARING MOTHER, and your CO-GLADIATOR. This often results in you walking away SOOT-FACED and SINGED TO SHIT, though your unruly mane grows back unrealistically fast. You enjoy yourself a good CONCERT, catching the early-morning GAME on the PROPAGANDA BOX, and long STALKS on UNDELLA BEACH. You're told you have a TOOTHY smile, even when you manage to keep your mouth shut. :oX Your trolltag is achromaticCrusade [AC] and you type with the GUTTUЯRAL GЯROWL of a woman who WANTS FOЯR _OTHING. STOP ASKI_G. (( Lore overview to be added in replies! )) https://cdn.imgchest.com/files/cd140be0a19c.jpg

Kult: +45
Kull: +35
Total: 80
Ratio: 1.29